FabSwingers.com forum: Seasonal Seriousness

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Christmas is supposed to be time for forgiveness... a time when people can put their differences aside and realize that perhaps those old arguements were really over nothing at all.

However... what's your _iew on forgiveness... d

Do you forgive but not forget?

Do you think everyone deserves a second or even a third chance?

Do you think forgiveness is weak and it's once bitten twice shy for you - no second chances, EVER?

Please play nice and add constructive comments it's not a thread posted to give folk a chance to bicker or level insults - just a genuine question on the true meaning of Christmas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've been bitten too many times in the past, by people, both online and in the real world, to trust "nice people", and to forgive those who have wronged me. It's not a nasty thing, purely a defence mechanism.

I have never been unkind or unpleasant to someone who was nice to me.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"Christmas is supposed to be time for forgiveness... a time when people can put their differences aside and realize that perhaps those old arguements were really over nothing at all.

However... what's your _iew on forgiveness... d

Do you forgive but not forget?

Do you think everyone deserves a second or even a third chance?

Do you think forgiveness is weak and it's once bitten twice shy for you - no second chances, EVER?

Please play nice and add constructive comments it's not a thread posted to give folk a chance to bicker or level insults - just a genuine question on the true meaning of Christmas

"
It really depends whats happend in the first place some things are just unforgivable .

But that said Im a very forgiving person and always give people more chances than they deserve at times .

Usually I just take timeout from any contact until things have settled down then try talk and see if things can be resolved if they cant I simply move on .

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The worst distance between two people is miscommunication

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By *awty MaxWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I am with the Dalai Lama on this one.

'Practicing forgiveness does not mean accepting wrong doing.'

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I am with the Dalai Lama on this one.

'Practicing forgiveness does not mean accepting wrong doing.'

Agreed Petit Pois

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By *atmanhMan
over a year ago

bellshill

Life's too short

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Life's too short"

So are ma legs grrrrrrrrrrrr

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"The worst distance between two people is miscommunication

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a very forgiving nature but anyone who mistakes that for weakness is incredibly mistaken. I am the one who offers the olive branch 9 times out of 10 and to my way of thinking that's a sign of strength rather than anything else.

In my life everyone gets a second chance but very rarely a third.

Having said that, sometimes life is better without the stress and drama that some individuals bring to it and enough truly is enough.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I have a very forgiving nature but anyone who mistakes that for weakness is incredibly mistaken. I am the one who offers the olive branch 9 times out of 10 and to my way of thinking that's a sign of strength rather than anything else.

In my life everyone gets a second chance but very rarely a third.

Having said that, sometimes life is better without the stress and drama that some individuals bring to it and enough truly is enough."

I think that there is a balance Jintz and that sounds about right to me ... there's a time to be big enough to offer the hand of friendship and forgiveness and a time to let go CxXx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Life's too short

So are ma legs grrrrrrrrrrrr

Its definitely know your Twinkletits x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Life's too short

So are ma legs grrrrrrrrrrrr

Its definitely know your Twinkletits x

Mother nature is a bitch and keeps having puppies... not mine OBVIOUSLY or she woulda had a C section ffs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Christmas is supposed to be time for forgiveness... a time when people can put their differences aside and realize that perhaps those old arguements were really over nothing at all.

However... what's your _iew on forgiveness... d

Do you forgive but not forget?

Do you think everyone deserves a second or even a third chance?

Do you think forgiveness is weak and it's once bitten twice shy for you - no second chances, EVER?

Please play nice and add constructive comments it's not a thread posted to give folk a chance to bicker or level insults - just a genuine question on the true meaning of Christmas

I sometimes get in an argumentative mood and crave conflict but I don't ever mean it so forgiveness is easy.

Only a few things I cant forgive and none of them I'm listing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Christmas is supposed to be time for forgiveness... a time when people can put their differences aside and realize that perhaps those old arguements were really over nothing at all.

However... what's your _iew on forgiveness... d

Do you forgive but not forget?

Do you think everyone deserves a second or even a third chance?

Do you think forgiveness is weak and it's once bitten twice shy for you - no second chances, EVER?

Please play nice and add constructive comments it's not a thread posted to give folk a chance to bicker or level insults - just a genuine question on the true meaning of Christmas

I sometimes get in an argumentative mood and crave conflict but I don't ever mean it so forgiveness is easy.

Only a few things I cant forgive and none of them I'm listing.

We noticed ya wee secret list keeper (Santa knows what they are btw... just saying...

)

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

I think it depends on the circumstances.

I've been estranged from my father since I was 21, I'm 38 this month. He passed away 4yrs ago and asked to see me before he died.

I made the decision not to see him or attend the funeral as I felt that was the right decision for me, and I still stand by that choice.

He did have a close relationship with my sister so he is a subject we don't really discuss. His remembrance was on Wednesday so I tend to avoid Facebook that day as my sister posts stuff. I try not to say anything negative out of respect for her.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

In my life everyone gets a second chance but very rarely a third.

Having said that, sometimes life is better without the stress and drama that some individuals bring to it and enough truly is enough."

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it depends on the circumstances.

I've been estranged from my father since I was 21, I'm 38 this month. He passed away 4yrs ago and asked to see me before he died.

I made the decision not to see him or attend the funeral as I felt that was the right decision for me, and I still stand by that choice.

I have something similar so feel for you situation - sometimes we know in our hearts what's best and that is different for all of us - even sisters xxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it depends on the circumstances.

I've been estranged from my father since I was 21, I'm 38 this month. He passed away 4yrs ago and asked to see me before he died.

I made the decision not to see him or attend the funeral as I felt that was the right decision for me, and I still stand by that choice.

Everyone knows what's best for them darling, and in a way you showed more strength than maybe taking the easy option. It was only your decision to make and should be respected.

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge

Not really a forgiving kinda person if messed aboit im more than happy to ignore them the rest of my life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think it depends on the circumstances.

I've been estranged from my father since I was 21, I'm 38 this month. He passed away 4yrs ago and asked to see me before he died.

I made the decision not to see him or attend the funeral as I felt that was the right decision for me, and I still stand by that choice.

I have a similar situation in regards to my brother and we have been estranged for 7 years. In that time he has become estranged with other family members and has positioned himself on the 'periphery' of the family - his choice.

I don't feel that I am losing out by not having him in my life and I am lucky to remain very close to his children (all adults now)

In general I am pretty easy going and most of my friends have been in my life 20+ years through ups and downs

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it depends on the circumstances.

I've been estranged from my father since I was 21, I'm 38 this month. He passed away 4yrs ago and asked to see me before he died.

I made the decision not to see him or attend the funeral as I felt that was the right decision for me, and I still stand by that choice.

I don't feel that I am losing out by not having him in my life and I am lucky to remain very close to his children (all adults now)

In general I am pretty easy going and most of my friends have been in my life 20+ years through ups and downs

Spookily like my own situation but with a sister... broke my heart at the time but I learned a lot - if only that nature abhors a vaccuum xxx

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By *wiftieeMan
over a year ago

near Glasgow

It might be Christmas, but there are some individuals on here who are not easy to forgive.

My 'blocked' list continues to grow, particularly with individuals who think they can get round being banned by returning under a new name, but they're soon found out!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Generally forgiving, as for forgetting that can be difficult.

We all make mistakes and misjudgements and so understanding that breeds forgiveness.

However there will at times come a point where enough is enough.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We noticed ya wee secret list keeper (Santa knows what they are btw... just saying...

I really don't get much intelligent conversation at work.

Plus I'm not really looking for meets so I can antagonize my little black heart out.

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By *ilshyxWoman
over a year ago

happy lil world

Nope no forgiveness wrong me once & your gone never looking back

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We noticed ya wee secret list keeper (Santa knows what they are btw... just saying...

)

I really don't get much intelligent conversation at work.

Plus I'm not really looking for meets so I can antagonize my little black heart out.

That would be a Black Magic heart then...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nope no forgiveness wrong me once & your gone never looking back

OOooer noted nawty nix xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It might be Christmas, but there are some individuals on here who are not easy to forgive.

My 'blocked' list continues to grow, particularly with individuals who think they can get round being banned by returning under a new name, but they're soon found out!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Generally forgiving, as for forgetting that can be difficult.

We all make mistakes and misjudgements and so understanding that breeds forgiveness.

However there will at times come a point where enough is enough. "

I'm somewhere around this thought... I was born with the gift/curse to be rather empathic... sometimes this has led to people taking advantage of my "good nature"... this is what others have told me for years btw... there does come a point where being nice turns into being a doormat.

xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Christmas is supposed to be time for forgiveness... a time when people can put their differences aside and realize that perhaps those old arguements were really over nothing at all.

However... what's your _iew on forgiveness... d

Do you forgive but not forget?

Do you think everyone deserves a second or even a third chance?

Do you think forgiveness is weak and it's once bitten twice shy for you - no second chances, EVER?

Please play nice and add constructive comments it's not a thread posted to give folk a chance to bicker or level insults - just a genuine question on the true meaning of Christmas

I have the capacity to forgive very easily, depending on a multitude of factors.

If i do forgive, i'll rarely forget, but won't dwell.

If i don't, i can cut a person very easily from my life and forget too.

And no, i don't think those who forgive are necessarily weak.

Although sometimes i do feel momentarily sad at the lack of self worth those who forgive almost anything must have (imho)

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

I decided a few years ago that no-one will negatively influence my life, I just don't allow myself to be affected by others.

Whether it's words on a screen, or in real life. It serves me well and not getting involved is just great.

People have wronged me but to waste a second of my time thinking about them is wasted life. I have one and I like to use it positively.

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By *andACouple
over a year ago

glasgow

Thankfully been very lucky and there's no one I can think of that I'd need to forgive for any reason.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I decided a few years ago that no-one will negatively influence my life, I just don't allow myself to be affected by others.

Whether it's words on a screen, or in real life. It serves me well and not getting involved is just great.

People have wronged me but to waste a second of my time thinking about them is wasted life. I have one and I like to use it positively."

This. Life's too short.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I decided a few years ago that no-one will negatively influence my life, I just don't allow myself to be affected by others.

Whether it's words on a screen, or in real life. It serves me well and not getting involved is just great.

People have wronged me but to waste a second of my time thinking about them is wasted life. I have one and I like to use it positively."

There are elements of this I follow now and decided to a number of years ago View

Don't think I have got it completely sorted but much better than previously

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Landa, you are fortunate indeed, View and Shorty - a wise and considered outlook as always. Tilly I think I understand your last point, it reminds me of the Relationship Triangle where you have the Victim, the Persecutor and the Persecuted... often they are interchangeable and you are right there are issues of self worth involved there to name but one

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I decided a few years ago that no-one will negatively influence my life, I just don't allow myself to be affected by others.

Whether it's words on a screen, or in real life. It serves me well and not getting involved is just great.

People have wronged me but to waste a second of my time thinking about them is wasted life. I have one and I like to use it positively.

There are elements of this I follow now and decided to a number of years ago View

Don't think I have got it completely sorted but much better than previously

We are all a work in progress methinks

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

"I think it depends on the circumstances.

I've been estranged from my father since I was 21, I'm 38 this month. He passed away 4yrs ago and asked to see me before he died.

I made the decision not to see him or attend the funeral as I felt that was the right decision for me, and I still stand by that choice.

I don't feel that I am losing out by not having him in my life and I am lucky to remain very close to his children (all adults now)

In general I am pretty easy going and most of my friends have been in my life 20+ years through ups and downs

Similar with my little brother, he lives in Edinburgh and only contacts my mum when he wants something, doesn't speak to the rest of us. Yet I'm willing to forgive his crap and get on for the sake of everyone else. He doesn't want to, his choice. And his loss, really. Doesn't bother me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We noticed ya wee secret list keeper (Santa knows what they are btw... just saying...

)

I really don't get much intelligent conversation at work.

Plus I'm not really looking for meets so I can antagonize my little black heart out.

That would be a Black Magic heart then...

Awww I like that!

I dont pick fights often except with my brat sub who keeps struggling when I try to chain or tie her up

but she's gone back to England over Christmas and I miss her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We noticed ya wee secret list keeper (Santa knows what they are btw... just saying...

)

I really don't get much intelligent conversation at work.

Plus I'm not really looking for meets so I can antagonize my little black heart out.

That would be a Black Magic heart then...

Awww I like that!

I dont pick fights often except with my brat sub who keeps struggling when I try to chain or tie her up

but she's gone back to England over Christmas and I miss her.

I see... I'm sure you do a Moonpig card to tell her that...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We noticed ya wee secret list keeper (Santa knows what they are btw... just saying...

)

I really don't get much intelligent conversation at work.

Plus I'm not really looking for meets so I can antagonize my little black heart out.

That would be a Black Magic heart then...

Awww I like that!

I dont pick fights often except with my brat sub who keeps struggling when I try to chain or tie her up

but she's gone back to England over Christmas and I miss her.

I see... I'm sure you do a Moonpig card to tell her that...

I sent her a steam punk snowflake necklace, she knows.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We noticed ya wee secret list keeper (Santa knows what they are btw... just saying...

)

I really don't get much intelligent conversation at work.

Plus I'm not really looking for meets so I can antagonize my little black heart out.

That would be a Black Magic heart then...

Awww I like that!

I dont pick fights often except with my brat sub who keeps struggling when I try to chain or tie her up

but she's gone back to England over Christmas and I miss her.

I see... I'm sure you do a Moonpig card to tell her that...

I sent her a steam punk snowflake necklace, she knows."

Ya auld romantic... good for you, you should ALWAYS let your woman know, we need to be reminded noo and again

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"I decided a few years ago that no-one will negatively influence my life, I just don't allow myself to be affected by others.

Whether it's words on a screen, or in real life. It serves me well and not getting involved is just great.

People have wronged me but to waste a second of my time thinking about them is wasted life. I have one and I like to use it positively.

There are elements of this I follow now and decided to a number of years ago View

Don't think I have got it completely sorted but much better than previously

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Certain things I can forgive but I don't forget.

Certain people however I will never forgive or forget.

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