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DAFT MESSAGES AND STATUS UPDATES

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sure this has been done before, but why not have a new one, what ya got. I'll go first;

Two minutes ago a girl had a status of "Up for anything you like"

so I sent her a message of;

["now don't shout at me,

do you like computer battleships and chess?

Just Asking Like

XxX peter

even though you hate me, I so bet you had a little smile"]

She deleted mail and looked at my profile but not blocked me YET.

lol, I'm sorry I just couldn't help myself

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Peter your not right lol

LOVE YOU

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Peter your not right lol

LOVE YOU "

Think I'm one of the sanest people in here well, my latest status update is;

"Yeah I'm Hot, Yeah I'm Sexy As Feck, Considerate and Passionate and No I'm Not Fucking Your Ass - Look ffs, I Just Want To Pay For This Banana, Please"

now whats wrong with that

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Peter your not right lol

LOVE YOU "

Love you. loll LOVE YOU, right get it pmsllllllll

love you more XxX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Peter your not right lol

LOVE YOU

Love you. loll LOVE YOU, right get it pmsllllllll

love you more XxX

"

Cherub Kisses big boy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had a guy message us with

"Enlighten me "

So we replied with "did u know a grizzly bear can run as fast as an average horse". x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sure this has been done before, but why not have a new one, what ya got. I'll go first;

Two minutes ago a girl had a status of "Up for anything you like"

so I sent her a message of;

["now don't shout at me,

do you like computer battleships and chess?

Just Asking Like

XxX peter

even though you hate me, I so bet you had a little smile"]

She deleted mail and looked at my profile but not blocked me YET.

lol, I'm sorry I just couldn't help myself

"

Hahahahaha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Sure this has been done before, but why not have a new one, what ya got. I'll go first;

Two minutes ago a girl had a status of "Up for anything you like"

so I sent her a message of;

["now don't shout at me,

do you like computer battleships and chess?

Just Asking Like

XxX peter

even though you hate me, I so bet you had a little smile"]

She deleted mail and looked at my profile but not blocked me YET.

lol, I'm sorry I just couldn't help myself

Hahahahaha "

She didn't block me, ya dancer

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We had a guy message us with

"Enlighten me "

So we replied with "did u know a grizzly bear can run as fast as an average horse". x"

You could have suggested Weight watchers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sure this has been done before, but why not have a new one, what ya got. I'll go first;

Two minutes ago a girl had a status of "Up for anything you like"

so I sent her a message of;

["now don't shout at me,

do you like computer battleships and chess?

Just Asking Like

XxX peter

even though you hate me, I so bet you had a little smile"]

She deleted mail and looked at my profile but not blocked me YET.

lol, I'm sorry I just couldn't help myself

Hahahahaha

She didn't block me, ya dancer

"

You are way too funny to block

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

heres a status that a couple and a guy messaged me and didn't get it;

I had "I Decided To Get A Tattoo On My Cock but The Tattooist Told Me He Couldn't Fit The Letter 'A' On It - Auch Well Maybe I Might Get A DOT instead"

See if you don't get this, ffs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few years ago I was having a wee bevvy at home while perving on here,seen a lasses status asking if any couples would let her listen on the phone as they fucked.

So I sent her a message saying I was just on my own but she could listen to me having a wank if she fancied.

She must've thought I was being serious as she just replied with a no thanks.

Meanwhile I'm half pished nearly falling off my chair laughing!

Ach well I crack myself up at least

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By *antinsomefun44Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire


"Sure this has been done before, but why not have a new one, what ya got. I'll go first;

Two minutes ago a girl had a status of "Up for anything you like"

so I sent her a message of;

["now don't shout at me,

do you like computer battleships and chess?

Just Asking Like

XxX peter

even though you hate me, I so bet you had a little smile"]

She deleted mail and looked at my profile but not blocked me YET.

lol, I'm sorry I just couldn't help myself

"

Lol peter u mad man. Ever thought about the fact that its not only the status quotes that make u laugh. What about when some1 says something that funny that u have to stop what ur doing just to have a good laugh hehe xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Sure this has been done before, but why not have a new one, what ya got. I'll go first;

Two minutes ago a girl had a status of "Up for anything you like"

so I sent her a message of;

["now don't shout at me,

do you like computer battleships and chess?

Just Asking Like

XxX peter

even though you hate me, I so bet you had a little smile"]

She deleted mail and looked at my profile but not blocked me YET.

lol, I'm sorry I just couldn't help myself

Lol peter u mad man. Ever thought about the fact that its not only the status quotes that make u laugh. What about when some1 says something that funny that u have to stop what ur doing just to have a good laugh hehe xxxx "

Who Told You I Had To Stop doing A 'NUMBER 2' half way through.

lollll

XxX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thank God for a sense of humour, Horsey!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Fab my pussy for my Snapchat name" or those kind of statuses that scream for attention.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Heres another one where I got 3 replies regarding it.

I put on my status:

{"If you think mines is big and thick then wait till you have a look at the size of my tree in the back garden"}

I really got 3 peeps sending me mail asking what kinda tree it was.

ffs I don't have a garden.

Some people just don't get me

lollllllll

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

I've had messages saying 'this isn't Facebook '. My status was about fab they just didn't see it that way

Humour bypass at times on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got to say I'm guilty for this especially when d*unk and the devil enters me

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east


"Got to say I'm guilty for this especially when d*unk and the devil enters me "

Is he on fab

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Got to say I'm guilty for this especially when d*unk and the devil enters me

Is he on fab "

either the wine has went to my head or I'm just being a bimbo

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By *mudg3rMan
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Saw an age preference of 18-99 ONLY last week. That'll stop that 103 yr old perv from messaging.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Guys I kid You Not

I put a status up the other day that said;

"Looking for A TV who is ON their Period and Has A Glass Eye"

I got a reply from a guy asking "Do TV's Have Periods"

I've not stopped laughing in one day to reply to him yet

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Guys I kid You Not

I put a status up the other day that said;

"Looking for A TV who is ON their Period and Has A Glass Eye"

I got a reply from a guy asking "Do TV's Have Periods"

I've not stopped laughing in one day to reply to him yet

"

I love you Peter

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Guys I kid You Not

I put a status up the other day that said;

"Looking for A TV who is ON their Period and Has A Glass Eye"

I got a reply from a guy asking "Do TV's Have Periods"

I've not stopped laughing in one day to reply to him yet

I love you Peter "

pmsl

with all your heart or just Love Sexually

Just asking like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Guys I kid You Not

I put a status up the other day that said;

"Looking for A TV who is ON their Period and Has A Glass Eye"

I got a reply from a guy asking "Do TV's Have Periods"

I've not stopped laughing in one day to reply to him yet

I love you Peter

pmsl

with all your heart or just Love Sexually

Just asking like

"

Lol I love your big erm personality

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By *lovesexxMan
over a year ago

Rochdale

Lol peter

Just lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love the statuses where something you've said appears as that persons status

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I love the statuses where something you've said appears as that persons status "

neverrrrrr

that must hurt but remember the guy might have feelings and not just a thick cock

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

you're no right in the head Pete... must have been all those footballs x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seen a status other day asking for interest to a impregnating party

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By *eefyBangerMan
over a year ago

edinburgh


"Seen a status other day asking for interest to a impregnating party "

I saw that too

Have people not got any respect for themselves anymore

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seen a status other day asking for interest to a impregnating party

I saw that too

Have people not got any respect for themselves anymore"

Apparently not wonder how many wee "fab" babies there are

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By *lovesexxMan
over a year ago

Rochdale


"Seen a status other day asking for interest to a impregnating party

I saw that too

Have people not got any respect for themselves anymore

Apparently not wonder how many wee "fab" babies there are "

How many indeed

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"you're no right in the head Pete... must have been all those footballs x "

Maybe we all see things differently

lol

never have I trudged through some heavy snow to watch a video

lollllllllllllll

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

and here is another status

Honest it did really happen to me

"At a 3some the girl said "I want fucked but THAT, (pointing to my cock), isn't going in my ass". I said, trust me, you'll only feel a little prick"

Honest

Half inchers have all the fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think jokes are lost on forums at best of times, christ peter was barely smirk material yet overwhelmed with how he is a fanny magnet yet seen lad other day write 3 or 4 hilarious comments and same kinda folk on here ass fucked him for going against the grain of the cliq

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think jokes are lost on forums at best of times, christ peter was barely smirk material yet overwhelmed with how he is a fanny magnet yet seen lad other day write 3 or 4 hilarious comments and same kinda folk on here ass fucked him for going against the grain of the cliq"

LOL think theres a few comments in there that gets a few going for and against, lollll

I was gonna put a post up called "Who's A Bitch and Not A Bitch" but get a feeling more would take it serious, AGAIN

So Glad I see the lighter side lollll

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By *ilshyxWoman
over a year ago

happy lil world


"Seen a status other day asking for interest to a impregnating party "

I've saw a ff profile for that purpose

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Seen a status other day asking for interest to a impregnating party

I've saw a ff profile for that purpose "

yeha and they also asked that the guy must be bi lol

talk about mental

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey Chooks ..ya handsome fecker..come take me too bed im gagging for ya ..

I mean how daft is that ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey Chooks ..ya handsome fecker..come take me too bed im gagging for ya ..

I mean how daft is that ....

"

Sorry I'm a bit blonde couldn't think of anything else to write

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey Chooks ..ya handsome fecker..come take me too bed im gagging for ya ..

I mean how daft is that ....

"

absurd even

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Hey Chooks ..ya handsome fecker..come take me too bed im gagging for ya ..

I mean how daft is that ....

absurd even "

I'm saying nuttin

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey Chooks ..ya handsome fecker..come take me too bed im gagging for ya ..

I mean how daft is that ....

Sorry I'm a bit blonde couldn't think of anything else to write "

i felt sexually abused ...though aroused at the same time ..ya ride x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey Chooks ..ya handsome fecker..come take me too bed im gagging for ya ..

I mean how daft is that ....

absurd even "

So It Wiz

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey Chooks ..ya handsome fecker..come take me too bed im gagging for ya ..

I mean how daft is that ....

absurd even

I'm saying nuttin

"

Its know like ya ..ya walloper

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Seen a status other day asking for interest to a impregnating party

I saw that too

Have people not got any respect for themselves anymore"

Aye me three,quite fancy being a dad with none of the responsibility or cost.

I mean,what could possibly go wrong?

I'll get on Jeremy Kyle yet!

I really shouldn't have to say this,but I will....joking folks...just joking!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I love the statuses where something you've said appears as that persons status

neverrrrrr

that must hurt but remember the guy might have feelings and not just a thick cock

The only thing he's "feeling" is his cock...sorry his "thick cock"

"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Recently I was on cam in the Scots Chat room and a hot woman said in the room

"Ouff Watching You is like Something out a Herbal Essence Advert".

So I've went onto google maps to see any waterfalls close by so that am Gonna Stand Under A Waterfall Washing with Shampoo n See if I Get A Meet.

Sometimes status works, sometimes they don't, but at least my hair looks and smells clean

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Peter you crack me up certainly made a cherub smile tonight you always brighten up the forum Hun xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Peter you crack me up certainly made a cherub smile tonight you always brighten up the forum Hun xx "

I know a waterfall at Loch Lomond,

just saying like !!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Peter you crack me up certainly made a cherub smile tonight you always brighten up the forum Hun xx

I know a waterfall at Loch Lomond,

just saying like !!!

"

Lol your nuts get to yet bed mr dream of waterfalls and bananas

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not quite a status update but a couple currently "looking to meet" this weekend.

Profile states, they aren't meeting for the foreseeable future etc. No pics, list of criteria and oh if lucky enough to be invited you're paying for hotel....

Good luck with that one....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not quite a status update but a couple currently "looking to meet" this weekend.

Profile states, they aren't meeting for the foreseeable future etc. No pics, list of criteria and oh if lucky enough to be invited you're paying for hotel....

Good luck with that one.... "

pmsl paying for hotel, are we allowed to have the breakfast that is included or they taking that as well

lollll

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll pay my way but I'm no mug.

So much selfishness on here

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