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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So I'm new here and I'm discovering that single guys have it pretty hard on here. No wonder they're all so butthurt all the time. But before I end up joining the ranks of the bitter, shunned and lonely, I should probably ask for any pointers anyone might have for being successful on here.

I find most of my messages go unread, and the ones that do are promptly deleted without so much as a polite decline... And I think that's what's most demoralising about this site especially for a man who usually sees himself as interesting and respectful. I get that patience and persistence are the key attributes to have, but you'd think on a site where literally everyone is looking for sex, I'd have more people to chat to than that one guy who keeps asking to suck me off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree single guys have a hard mountain to climb on here

But Iv said it before ...if someone sees your profile and fancies you...they will message...it's that simple

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Looks like getting that first verification to get the ball rolling will take an age then... Or perhaps never. I'm probably gonna give this up sooner rather than later if this is par for the course.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Loads of social nights you could attend or the popular cjs?

Loads of ways to get your face known...even posting in the forums

It is what it is..

Trick is not too take this site too seriously

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I have a funny feeling this is going to be a stupid question - but what are CJs?

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Patience and get it into your head ..just because your on here doesnt guarantee you a shag and be yourself let people see the real you and youll do ok

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I never thought I'd be guaranteed a shag, just to be clear. I did expect to chat to people from the area and actually get responses though. I recently used Fetlife quite a lot, but it's really more for BDSM social networking... Looking for sex on that just felt a bit too seedy hah. Somehow, I expected people to be just as friendly here.

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow


"I have a funny feeling this is going to be a stupid question - but what are CJs?"

See club section

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cjs is a place for folk to meet pay a fee tho but alot enjoy going

I'd say keep watching the forums join in the posts and get your face known

Good luck

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Conduct yourself as an equal at all times and dance to no-one's tune but your own. Maintain your standards and ignore the bluster.

Welcome and good luck, there are many good times to be had.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Meh, you've gotta pay a fee to get into a regular club to meet folk anyway, so that doesn't phase me.

I'll look into it.

Thanks for the advice guys!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes its hard for us single guys,

that's why i attend socials as its the only way to get verified

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I'm new here and I'm discovering that single guys have it pretty hard on here. No wonder they're all so butthurt "

Hehehe....

You said butthurt

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"So I'm new here and I'm discovering that single guys have it pretty hard on here. No wonder they're all so butthurt

Hehehe....

You said butthurt "

Possibly a wrong choice of words depending on orientation haha. I bet some guys here actually want to get butthurt haha

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By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow

I've found be funny and nice and treat people with respect and you'll do okay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I'm new here and I'm discovering that single guys have it pretty hard on here. No wonder they're all so butthurt

Hehehe....

You said butthurt

Possibly a wrong choice of words depending on orientation haha. I bet some guys here actually want to get butthurt haha "

I think when a few supposedly straight single guys don't find a lot of favour with the ladies that's when the butthurt comes into play!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe take more pics also, 1 friend pic is not enough for women who are window shopping.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Be careful what you put as a status update too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A profile that isn't simply made up of cock pics and "looking for fun" type text. Reveal a little of your swinger preferences, be suggestive but not graphically explicit and above all if it's a couple you are messaging please remember it's a couple and chat to them as such a it is a male and female you hope to meet.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A profile that isn't simply made up of cock pics and "looking for fun" type text. Reveal a little of your swinger preferences, be suggestive but not graphically explicit and above all if it's a couple you are messaging please remember it's a couple and chat to them as such a it is a male and female you hope to meet."

Well, no dick pics, so I'm halfway there at least. Did have one as the friend only image, but you need friends before anyone can see it haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lower your standards n you'll be knee deep in clunge in no time at all

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll honestly tell you limit any expectation you have about the site. try going to socials, make new friends and even at that you might not get a meet but surely over a period of time you will . One more thing create an identity or standard for yourself. Happy fabbing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope to attend cjs shortly but too nervous to go alone if anyone cares to join me?

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By *ornographic ArtsCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

No reply/delete is to be taken as a polite "no thanks". Writing messages like that are always awkward, not pleasant and most of the time end in abuse or attempts to change your mind.

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

Be you and have fun. Get out and about. You'll meet some wonderful people.

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"No reply/delete is to be taken as a polite "no thanks". Writing messages like that are always awkward, not pleasant and most of the time end in abuse or attempts to change your mind."

I can honestly say when I get a "No thanks" I just respond with "Oh well, no problem - happy swinging."

I quite like some acknowledge

Obviously if some folks spit the dummy I get why people don't respond, but it just seems rude to ignore some entirely.

Mind you, seen a friends inbox on here once and she'd need a secretary to respond to all the messages she got. Was quite a thing to see.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I'll honestly tell you limit any expectation you have about the site. try going to socials, make new friends and even at that you might not get a meet but surely over a period of time you will . One more thing create an identity or standard for yourself. Happy fabbing "

Says you who has no problem getting meets

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By *ornographic ArtsCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

Not everyone does, but it's not worth the hassle. Especially when the FAQ state:

"There are too many rude people on here who don't reply to my messages!

It's not rude not to reply.

Some ladies and couples get hundreds of messages a day so it simply isn't possible for them to reply to everyone. If you don't get a response, you should assume they aren't interested. If you're getting a lot of "no-replies" then you should consider your profile and the messages you send. Are they giving the right message? Are you standing out from the thousands of other guys on here?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Be you and have fun. Get out and about. You'll meet some wonderful people.

Good luck "

Simple but excellent advice. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also finding it hard and never off on the weekend as I'm always at bloody work so never get a chance to go to cj's. Nearly had a meet last week but fell through at the last minute. Meaning that all important first verification still escapes me. Chin up. Something will appear soon I guess.

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