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most awkward meet n how u got out of it :-)

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By *egend10 OP   Man
over a year ago

glasgow/greenock

Out the kitchen window haha quicksyle

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By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow

Yet to have one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Excuse about kids only ever once. Have to admit I was desperate

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By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow


"Excuse about kids only ever once. Have to admit I was desperate "

That's happened to me! Shit I was the awkward meet

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By *lawless doveWoman
over a year ago

bothwell

Meet a guy a few weeks ago been chatting for ages shared pics etc spoke on phone and was a really friendly guy. I agreed to go for dinner.

When I got there I realised the pics were from a few years back and he looked totally different long straggly hair unkept bear dirty finger nails and bad breath.

Conversation was very dry as we waited for our table and he was fidgeting all the time. I couldn't take anymore and handed him £30 and said hope you enjoy the meal your no longer for me and legged it out the restuarant forgetting my jacket.

I went back the next day and the guy who was on said it was the funniest thing he ever saw.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

None that were that bad, but one or two I cut short. So to speak.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Haven't had the experience yet, 1st meet is Saturday night. I am however hoping it goes a little more smoothly and less awkwardly than the aforementioned.

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By *redfreddyMan
over a year ago

Valencia

I was in mid sex and the lady kept ramming her tongue so hard down my throat that I struggled to breathe. Real rapid firm tonguing, like an ant eater on speed. I love French kissing, but it felt like i was being tongued by a Labrador.

I told her a few times that I found it off putting, and she kept apologising, but the more turned on she got, the more she started the deep throat tonguing. Real smothering. I swear she could lick paint off a fence.

I just had to stop, pulled on my jeans and politely left.

Judge me now....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Excuse about kids only ever once. Have to admit I was desperate

That's happened to me! Shit I was the awkward meet "

Haha was a couple

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow


"Out the kitchen window haha quicksyle "

How many floors up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Met someone for a social and decided as he lived quite far away, we could take it further on the same day

So the guy said he would nip home, have a quick shower and I would go to his address 15mins later.

So I arrived, started to get down to oral and he was Ummm not smelling fresh shall we say

So I stopped and suggested we shower together

His face lit up, he nipped through to put shower on and I fkd off out the door

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By *redfreddyMan
over a year ago

Valencia


"Haven't had the experience yet, 1st meet is Saturday night. I am however hoping it goes a little more smoothly and less awkwardly than the aforementioned."

Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chatting to a lady for ages and she invited me round to hers.

Got there and saw mountains of empty wine bottles and the house was bogging

Got a sob story about her husband cheating on her

Then saw pic of her hubby and knew him as I worked in the same building and remembered the bunny boiler stories. Saw her one night at the office out of her face, removed her coat and was completely naked begging him.

Got out of there really quick.

Seen her on telly since really turned her life around

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Chatting to a lady for ages and she invited me round to hers.

Got there and saw mountains of empty wine bottles and the house was bogging

Got a sob story about her husband cheatirng on her

Then saw pic of her hubby and knew him as I worked in the same building and remembered the bunny boiler stories. Saw her one night at the office out of her face, removed her coat and was completely naked begging him.

Got out of there really quick.

Seen her on telly since really turned her life around

"
thought you promised no tae tell anyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Said Mr had a message from work saying he had taken keys of one of the vehicles and they needed him to take them back. He was 4 inches shorter than he said and the pics were obviously years old . His bed had collapsed and was full of Buckfast bottles and there was a chest of drawers in front of the door to keep it shut . Oh and he opened the door with a football top and joggies on !! Apparently he had been on a bender

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My bed collapsed in the middle of a meet...

Thankfully it didn't put him off

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By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow


"Excuse about kids only ever once. Have to admit I was desperate

That's happened to me! Shit I was the awkward meet

Haha was a couple "

I just meant in general! Not your awkward meet! Just I've not had an awkward meet cause I've been the awkward meet

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By *ingerTwistWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Someone I arranged to meet from another site, had his pal turn up to vet me before he arrived! He approached me at the bar asked if I was "ginger" and said his pal (my date) was outside and since I was "pretty much" like my pictures, he'd come in and meet me!!!

After i stopped laughing and realised he was serious I downed my drink and left without saying a word, while the guy frantically tried to get his pal on the phone to come in. I wish I had a witty comeback but I was gobsmacked.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Chatting to a lady for ages and she invited me round to hers.

Got there and saw mountains of empty wine bottles and the house was bogging

Got a sob story about her husband cheatirng on her

Then saw pic of her hubby and knew him as I worked in the same building and remembered the bunny boiler stories. Saw her one night at the office out of her face, removed her coat and was completely naked begging him.

Got out of there really quick.

Seen her on telly since really turned her life around

thought you promised no tae tell anyone "

That was you!!!!!!! FS you've aged well

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By *ingerTwistWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Then there was the chap who arrived with a rucksack fI'll of labour party propaganda and proceeded to regale me with his boy crush on Nigel Griffiths. I told him I was a dyed in the wool tory and there was no possible future, then scarpered

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By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow


"Someone I arranged to meet from another site, had his pal turn up to vet me before he arrived! He approached me at the bar asked if I was "ginger" and said his pal (my date) was outside and since I was "pretty much" like my pictures, he'd come in and meet me!!!

After i stopped laughing and realised he was serious I downed my drink and left without saying a word, while the guy frantically tried to get his pal on the phone to come in. I wish I had a witty comeback but I was gobsmacked. "

This for the win!!

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By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London

Went to meet a woman at her place.. First impression was that she is a good photographer because she didn't appear the same as in her photos

Her bed was all broken, on the floor, stinking like an ashtray, lights didn't work except for hallway light... Then she jokingly said that she's pinholed the condoms

So i Made an excuse that I've got to be up early in the morning and need my sleep..... And left...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Out onto the balcony and into the close. Fortunately it was a ground floor flat but unfortunately in the rush I left my car keys

Certainly more careful now LOL

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Never had a bad or awkward meet in all these years ...still time i suppose lol

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By *uckoocuckooMan
over a year ago

Tayside/Fife

met a couple without seeing face pics. got inside the house & it was minging with dirty ashtrays & clutter, etc.

guy got up to nip out for fags - and locked door behind him

left me with his gollum looking partner

I said I was nipping to toilet, headed into a bedroom, & squeezed out a tilting window - remembering the story of medusa, i never looked back.

jumped in car & drove away, passing guy coming back from shops with his packet of fags.....

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By *redfreddyMan
over a year ago

Valencia


"met a couple without seeing face pics. got inside the house & it was minging with dirty ashtrays & clutter, etc.

guy got up to nip out for fags - and locked door behind him

left me with his gollum looking partner

I said I was nipping to toilet, headed into a bedroom, & squeezed out a tilting window - remembering the story of medusa, i never looked back.

jumped in car & drove away, passing guy coming back from shops with his packet of fags....."

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By *egend10 OP   Man
over a year ago

glasgow/greenock


"Met someone for a social and decided as he lived quite far away, we could take it further on the same day

So the guy said he would nip home, have a quick shower and I would go to his address 15mins later.

So I arrived, started to get down to oral and he was Ummm not smelling fresh shall we say

So I stopped and suggested we shower together

His face lit up, he nipped through to put shower on and I fkd off out the door "

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By *egend10 OP   Man
over a year ago

glasgow/greenock

Shoulda left him a tip haha as in bar of soap for ur troubles

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By *tttttTouchMeWoman
over a year ago

Kilmarnock

I had a date with this really intelligent, articulate PhD student, who dressed smartly and was clean & freshly shaven - he had great chat, and I expected it to go swimmingly. Turned out the 'clean' part stopped once his clothes came off. LITERAL KNOB CHEESE. Not to mention the 'residue' in the hair of his bum. CODE BROWN. I swear I gagged, and not in the fun way I wanted to. I asked him if I could have a drink, and he went to make cocktails... Well, I had had enough of his cock - tails or otherwise! I said I had no signal on my phone, so I was just nipping outside to let my best friend know I was safe, and made a joke that I had to before she phoned the police... In actuality I jumped on the subway, went home and drank a bottle of wine with the aforementioned best friend.

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By *urlywurly69Woman
over a year ago

Edinburgh


"Said Mr had a message from work saying he had taken keys of one of the vehicles and they needed him to take them back. He was 4 inches shorter than he said and the pics were obviously years old . His bed had collapsed and was full of Buckfast bottles and there was a chest of drawers in front of the door to keep it shut . Oh and he opened the door with a football top and joggies on !! Apparently he had been on a bender "

Sounds exactly like someone I had the misfortune of meeting, but instead of the football top and joggies he had a onesie on!!!

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By *e_frenchMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

Thx I will have nightmares reading these stories

X

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By *redfreddyMan
over a year ago

Valencia

[Removed by poster at 14/09/16 00:24:05]

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By *redfreddyMan
over a year ago

Valencia


"I had a date with this really intelligent, articulate PhD student, who dressed smartly and was clean & freshly shaven - he had great chat, and I expected it to go swimmingly. Turned out the 'clean' part stopped once his clothes came off. LITERAL KNOB CHEESE. Not to mention the 'residue' in the hair of his bum. CODE BROWN. I swear I gagged, and not in the fun way I wanted to. I asked him if I could have a drink, and he went to make cocktails... Well, I had had enough of his cock - tails or otherwise! I said I had no signal on my phone, so I was just nipping outside to let my best friend know I was safe, and made a joke that I had to before she phoned the police... In actuality I jumped on the subway, went home and drank a bottle of wine with the aforementioned best friend. "

That is truly, truly foul.

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By *tew008Man
over a year ago

edinburgh


"I had a date with this really intelligent, articulate PhD student, who dressed smartly and was clean & freshly shaven - he had great chat, and I expected it to go swimmingly. Turned out the 'clean' part stopped once his clothes came off. LITERAL KNOB CHEESE. Not to mention the 'residue' in the hair of his bum. CODE BROWN. I swear I gagged, and not in the fun way I wanted to. I asked him if I could have a drink, and he went to make cocktails... Well, I had had enough of his cock - tails or otherwise! I said I had no signal on my phone, so I was just nipping outside to let my best friend know I was safe, and made a joke that I had to before she phoned the police... In actuality I jumped on the subway, went home and drank a bottle of wine with the aforementioned best friend.

That is truly, truly foul."

jeezo that's just wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got sent a face pic. It was my sister.

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By *anny77Man
over a year ago

glasgow


"Got sent a face pic. It was my sister. "

Oh man!!!!

Hope she's not on here still and reading this and dying on the inside

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

bumped into a mate at the GUM clinic - Ninewells, when I was in for health check, he popped a magazine right up at his face as if; "im invisible", obviously I went right over and sat next to him, asking what he is in here for

.

anyone else head in for annual health checks? I might go in later this morning

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By *ilk and sugarCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

[Removed by poster at 14/09/16 11:13:43]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i broke his nose

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By *ablo30Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Met a lady once who was nothing like her pic that she sent (sadly not in a good way!). Not one to miss an opportunity, I was able to finally benefit from my ability to cum far too quickly, made an excuse about needing to get to work and bolted......no harm no foul!!!

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By *uncan LynnCouple
over a year ago

Kilmarnock

Met a lovely hung of a black man in the counting house , well his picture was. Super confident in the chat , I like the dominant ones ,

Well he must have sent his son that looked like him . He could hardly string a sentence together and was not the hunk.

It was the shortest social in history .

Thankfully Duncan is very direct and blunt .

Eh who you try to kid son , not a snowballs chance .

And he left .

Oh well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Giggled at these .

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By *uzzyDuck75Man
over a year ago

Glasgow & Yorkshire

Funniest topic in a while. Brilliant stories.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was in mid sex and the lady kept ramming her tongue so hard down my throat that I struggled to breathe. Real rapid firm tonguing, like an ant eater on speed. I love French kissing, but it felt like i was being tongued by a Labrador.

I told her a few times that I found it off putting, and she kept apologising, but the more turned on she got, the more she started the deep throat tonguing. Real smothering. I swear she could lick paint off a fence.

I just had to stop, pulled on my jeans and politely left.

Judge me now...."
an ant eater on speed

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By *redfreddyMan
over a year ago

Valencia


"I was in mid sex and the lady kept ramming her tongue so hard down my throat that I struggled to breathe. Real rapid firm tonguing, like an ant eater on speed. I love French kissing, but it felt like i was being tongued by a Labrador.

I told her a few times that I found it off putting, and she kept apologising, but the more turned on she got, the more she started the deep throat tonguing. Real smothering. I swear she could lick paint off a fence.

I just had to stop, pulled on my jeans and politely left.

Judge me now.... an ant eater on speed "

I still have nightmares. I can't open a packet of sliced salami without breaking into a sweat.

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