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At the garage...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I was at the petrol station this afternoon, filling up and noticed a bloke in front of me leaning on his car with one hand and pulling the bowser nozzle out with the other, the thing is he forgot to let go of the trigger and soaked his arm in petrol.

Anyway, when I got back in my car I drove out behind that bloke. As I followed I noticed he was trying to light a cigarette when all of sudden his whole arm explodes into flames, he then starts flapping his arm out the window.

Almost instantaneously a copper comes screaming up from behind me, pulls the car over, rips the bloke out of his car, throws him to the ground, and arrests him.

So, curious, I jump out of my car and ask the copper why the bloke’s being arrested? The copper replies;

Possession of a fire arm!

(You may now groan!)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was at the petrol station this afternoon, filling up and noticed a bloke in front of me leaning on his car with one hand and pulling the bowser nozzle out with the other, the thing is he forgot to let go of the trigger and soaked his arm in petrol.

Anyway, when I got back in my car I drove out behind that bloke. As I followed I noticed he was trying to light a cigarette when all of sudden his whole arm explodes into flames, he then starts flapping his arm out the window.

Almost instantaneously a copper comes screaming up from behind me, pulls the car over, rips the bloke out of his car, throws him to the ground, and arrests him.

So, curious, I jump out of my car and ask the copper why the bloke’s being arrested? The copper replies;

Possession of a fire arm!

(You may now groan!)"

joke is full of flaws

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

As far as I am aware, jokes don't have to 100% factual.

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow


"I was at the petrol station this afternoon, filling up and noticed a bloke in front of me leaning on his car with one hand and pulling the bowser nozzle out with the other, the thing is he forgot to let go of the trigger and soaked his arm in petrol.

Anyway, when I got back in my car I drove out behind that bloke. As I followed I noticed he was trying to light a cigarette when all of sudden his whole arm explodes into flames, he then starts flapping his arm out the window.

Almost instantaneously a copper comes screaming up from behind me, pulls the car over, rips the bloke out of his car, throws him to the ground, and arrests him.

So, curious, I jump out of my car and ask the copper why the bloke’s being arrested? The copper replies;

Possession of a fire arm!

(You may now groan!)"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was at the petrol station this afternoon, filling up and noticed a bloke in front of me leaning on his car with one hand and pulling the bowser nozzle out with the other, the thing is he forgot to let go of the trigger and soaked his arm in petrol.

Anyway, when I got back in my car I drove out behind that bloke. As I followed I noticed he was trying to light a cigarette when all of sudden his whole arm explodes into flames, he then starts flapping his arm out the window.

Almost instantaneously a copper comes screaming up from behind me, pulls the car over, rips the bloke out of his car, throws him to the ground, and arrests him.

So, curious, I jump out of my car and ask the copper why the bloke’s being arrested? The copper replies;

Possession of a fire arm!

(You may now groan!)"

Did he take it cheerfuelly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was at the petrol station this afternoon, filling up and noticed a bloke in front of me leaning on his car with one hand and pulling the bowser nozzle out with the other, the thing is he forgot to let go of the trigger and soaked his arm in petrol.

Anyway, when I got back in my car I drove out behind that bloke. As I followed I noticed he was trying to light a cigarette when all of sudden his whole arm explodes into flames, he then starts flapping his arm out the window.

Almost instantaneously a copper comes screaming up from behind me, pulls the car over, rips the bloke out of his car, throws him to the ground, and arrests him.

So, curious, I jump out of my car and ask the copper why the bloke’s being arrested? The copper replies;

Possession of a fire arm!

(You may now groan!)joke is full of flaws "

Seriously? It was a bit of fun!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I was at the petrol station this afternoon, filling up and noticed a bloke in front of me leaning on his car with one hand and pulling the bowser nozzle out with the other, the thing is he forgot to let go of the trigger and soaked his arm in petrol.

Anyway, when I got back in my car I drove out behind that bloke. As I followed I noticed he was trying to light a cigarette when all of sudden his whole arm explodes into flames, he then starts flapping his arm out the window.

Almost instantaneously a copper comes screaming up from behind me, pulls the car over, rips the bloke out of his car, throws him to the ground, and arrests him.

So, curious, I jump out of my car and ask the copper why the bloke’s being arrested? The copper replies;

Possession of a fire arm!

(You may now groan!)joke is full of flaws "

Fuck sake, it's a joke!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"As far as I am aware, jokes don't have to 100% factual."

It would seem that they don't have to be funny either

lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

Did he take it cheerfuelly "

Glad to see there some on here with sense of humour.

The rest are probably health and safety inspectors.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Did he take it cheerfuelly

Glad to see there some on here with sense of humour.

The rest are probably health and safety inspectors. "

I thought having a sense of humour was essential for here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I did actually groan!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did actually groan! "

So did I!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!"

I thought that was just your age auld man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I must be thick cause I didn't see any flaws. Did chuckle though!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I must be thick cause I didn't see any flaws. Did chuckle though! "

Oh Jinty don't encourage him

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Didn't groan, cringed

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man "

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets! "

I will kick your zimmer away

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away "

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Genuinely thought it was a real story till that last line haha

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses?? "

I type in braille!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you think he has a nickname of hot stuff?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses??

I type in braille! "

Ya know what. ....think I will give your joke 4 stars

Oh no. ...can't get 4 star anymore. ..diesel ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses??

I type in braille!

Ya know what. ....think I will give your joke 4 stars

Oh no. ...can't get 4 star anymore. ..diesel ?? "

You're a gas missus

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses??

I type in braille!

Ya know what. ....think I will give your joke 4 stars

Oh no. ...can't get 4 star anymore. ..diesel ??

You're a gas missus "

I think you pair have fuelled around a fair amount here . ( more groaning )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses??

I type in braille!

Ya know what. ....think I will give your joke 4 stars

Oh no. ...can't get 4 star anymore. ..diesel ??

You're a gas missus "

Sorry about that

It was the sprouts

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses??

I type in braille!

Ya know what. ....think I will give your joke 4 stars

Oh no. ...can't get 4 star anymore. ..diesel ??

You're a gas missus

Sorry about that

It was the sprouts "

Lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I did actually groan!

So did I!

I thought that was just your age auld man

Quiet, or I'll reveal your Tena Lady secrets!

You young upstarts have no respect for your elders!

I will kick your zimmer away

At least get your post in the right order...can't you find your glasses??

I type in braille!

Ya know what. ....think I will give your joke 4 stars

Oh no. ...can't get 4 star anymore. ..diesel ?? "

Hey! Premium...

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