FabSwingers.com forum: Unopened

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok I know you women folk get hundreds of messages an hour never mind in a day!!! So my question is

What makes you open mail and not just delete!!

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By *issBehavingxxWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

For me its the content of the profile...

Text and pics.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

But 90% of the time there is no profile view and no open messages

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lots of folk look at the profile first, if there in stealth mode you won't know who looked at your profile. We might have, you would never know.(Mr)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pics and text on profile. If that doesn't interest me then I wouldn't open mail . I perve I mean look in stealth mode so you wouldn't know if I've looked at you. Like to keep my pervies secret

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pics and text on profile. If that doesn't interest me then I wouldn't open mail . I perve I mean look in stealth mode so you wouldn't know if I've looked at you. Like to keep my pervies secret

Agreed on this but also you can see the first line of the message so you often get a gist... especially if it's a hi how are you one etc

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Stealth mode!! Never knew it existed!

To be honest I could do with a profile update me thinks

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Stealth mode!! Never knew it existed!

To be honest I could do with a profile update me thinks

Pics are good

Few tight boxers pics and oooooft

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I never really realised how hard it was to take pics of yourself lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I never really realised how hard it was to take pics of yourself lol"

No not easy. Take 370 and pick the best one

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Hahaha was thinking video then freeze frame

So this stealth mode how do you do it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hahaha was thinking video then freeze frame

So this stealth mode how do you do it "

Ahh there you go your catching on

Aw that's a trade secret . Can't tell you. I'd need to hunt you down and kill ya

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By *izzabelle and well hungCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh.

They do get looked at.... The title, your location, gender, 12 words and your picture. All without the inconvenience of having to look further. I can read and delete 10 messages in 20 seconds. Reading and replying would take an hour. Sounds like a job to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pics and text on profile. If that doesn't interest me then I wouldn't open mail . I perve I mean look in stealth mode so you wouldn't know if I've looked at you. Like to keep my pervies secret

Agreed on this but also you can see the first line of the message so you often get a gist... especially if it's a hi how are you one etc "

all true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would be better if everyone filtered messages from everyone else by default, then used winks to allow the person they wink at to message them. Think Tinder.

Would free women up to go look at people's profiles and would force single guys to actually make a decent profile or float alone through Fab forever.

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge

But this isnt tinder......whatever that is as ive said on a previous post a wink isnt a question and sorry to say it but if folk think it is it shows a lack of courage imo to initiate contact. If I recieve a msg from a disrespectful gay or bi guy I block them the others I inform unlike many this is a straight profile and they are fine with it. I believe alot of the time fems over exagerate the amount of msgs they recieve due to another fem saying a hundred they say 150. Fems I know recieve nothing like that amount but they do recieve a quickfire 10 when they log on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"But this isnt tinder......whatever that is as ive said on a previous post a wink isnt a question and sorry to say it but if folk think it is it shows a lack of courage imo to initiate contact. If I recieve a msg from a disrespectful gay or bi guy I block them the others I inform unlike many this is a straight profile and they are fine with it. I believe alot of the time fems over exagerate the amount of msgs they recieve due to another fem saying a hundred they say 150. Fems I know recieve nothing like that amount but they do recieve a quickfire 10 when they log on."

I know, however it would be a simple solution to the "I get messages I don't want" problem. It doesn't help the people who use number of messages received as a confidence booster though...

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By *yldstyleWoman
over a year ago

A world of my own

Laziness. It's too much effort to press the button sometimes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To be fair I don't think you can/should make a judgement on someone based on his/her profile pictures or text.

Maybe someone isn't great with words or doesn't really know what pictures to upload, maybe people are missing out on good meets, perhaps even the best meet of their life just because they jump to conclusions based on things that don't really describe that person or show them for what they really are.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"Ok I know you women folk get hundreds of messages an hour never mind in a day!!! So my question is

What makes you open mail and not just delete!! "
it's a mix of things .

I read the profile first then look at any photos if they interest me I will read the email but that's not to say I'l always reply to it .

Just depends each is individual xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"To be fair I don't think you can/should make a judgement on someone based on his/her profile pictures or text.

You have to I'm afraid. When you're out in a club or pub trying to get laid you don't talk to everyone there just to see who you might be compatible with: you only talk to the ones you're actually attracted to. Same applies on here, and to get butt hurt when someone doesn't choose you is stupid unless you're willing to talk to absolutely anyone on here regardless of whether or not you're attracted to them.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"To be fair I don't think you can/should make a judgement on someone based on his/her profile pictures or text.

I mean if your out in a club or pub and meet someone you don't say to them, "Go home, put your best suit/dress on & come back to me with a 500+ word well written description of yourself" Do you? No! You talk to them, get to know them & decide if you like them."
but if your in a pub you must be attracted to someone enough to approach them in the first place so in effect it's the same as looking at profiles on here and thinking yes they look attractive so let's talk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can this thread be re-titled to "My profile says NSA fun and I have one out of focus cock-shot: Y U NO LOVE ME"?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Both comments above^

I get what you both are saying, and I agree with you should be attracted to someone, but to be fair, in a pub or club people are drinking & not all but alot maybe even most guys to to pubs or clubs because they know women will be drinking and easier to get, just a fact.

For what it's worth I don't drink and wouldn't sleep with someone who had been drinking, tried before and I can't do it, kinda feels like rape when a woman is d*unk and puts me right off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Both comments above^

For what it's worth I don't drink and wouldn't sleep with someone who had been drinking, tried before and I can't do it, kinda feels like rape when a woman is d*unk and puts me right off.

Possibly true, but irrelevant to the point we were making. Attraction isn't a choice, so don't blame anyone for being or NOT being attracted to anyone else.

The main thing that bothers me on here is people making no effort and then complaining that it got them nowhere.

The other thing is people complaining about getting messages from single guys when they haven't taken the 12 seconds to block them, but that's another story!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Both comments above^

For what it's worth I don't drink and wouldn't sleep with someone who had been drinking, tried before and I can't do it, kinda feels like rape when a woman is d*unk and puts me right off.

Possibly true, but irrelevant to the point we were making. Attraction isn't a choice, so don't blame anyone for being or NOT being attracted to anyone else.

The main thing that bothers me on here is people making no effort and then complaining that it got them nowhere.

The other thing is people complaining about getting messages from single guys when they haven't taken the 12 seconds to block them, but that's another story!"
I've made an effort and not bothered most of the women that have mailed me have done so because they liked my pics, whenever I get meets it's usually with little effort put in on my profile.

As for the guys mailing I've been here for 7 nearly 8years and only just figured out a few month ago about the message filters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Then we're actually in agreement.

Maybe the world would be a much better place if looks didn't matter so much, but it's hard coded into our DNA, male and female alike.

It's also a problem for beautiful people who have absolutely shit personalities, incidentally! A different problem I guess, but a problem nonetheless.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot."

Block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

Block. "

I'm a good person tho and try not to use it. Always hopeful that they'll take the hint!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

Block.

I'm a good person tho and try not to use it. Always hopeful that they'll take the hint!! "

If someone doesn't take the first hint then you owe them nothing. Being a good person has nothing to do with it if the other person isn't being good.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

Block.

I'm a good person tho and try not to use it. Always hopeful that they'll take the hint!!

If someone doesn't take the first hint then you owe them nothing. Being a good person has nothing to do with it if the other person isn't being good. "

Harsh. Two strikes and then yer out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me sometimes its if i see a friend has messaged i tend to open n reply to that first n at times you get into a conversation afor you know it messages roll off the page then you have a build up of unread ..at times deleted but not intentionally coz its a bad profile just coz too many

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

Block.

I'm a good person tho and try not to use it. Always hopeful that they'll take the hint!!

If someone doesn't take the first hint then you owe them nothing. Being a good person has nothing to do with it if the other person isn't being good.

Harsh. Two strikes and then yer out

I'm afraid this is how I am now. Men and women face different problems here but bad manners does not have to be one. I have on my profile that if I do not reply please take it as a polite no thank you (which the site rules also enforce)... that is over and above the fact I have that I am happy with my current arrangements and do not seek new contacts on there too... yet I still get messages and some persist by either asking if I can "fit them in" which infuriates me as it is so disrespectful or can they keep messaging... again, I try to be tolerant and explain politely why not as I believe this is educating those who have the "dialashag" mentality... however it is always difficult to walk the line between being considered rude because you don't answer or misleading if you do... In any case my ethos is not to let the small minded ones bring me down to their level and be rude too.

I had one message today saying

Him "you free"

Me "No but you're in Watford it's immaterial?"

Him "I work near you"

Me "Your messages are brief and uniformative but I can only presume your messages are in regard to meeting, thanks for your interest but I have all I require re the site, Happy Swinging, Red"

He deleted with no response... I am sure you can see why such rude and seemingly presumptuous messages could easily have been a delete from the first for most females.

On the plus side I often get very lovely thank you for responding messages too so there are lovely folk out there too.

Ohhh the fun of fab folks eh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

Block.

I'm a good person tho and try not to use it. Always hopeful that they'll take the hint!!

If someone doesn't take the first hint then you owe them nothing. Being a good person has nothing to do with it if the other person isn't being good.

Harsh. Two strikes and then yer out

I had one message today saying

Him "you free"

Me "No but you're in Watford it's immaterial?"

Him "I work near you"

Me "Your messages are brief and uniformative but I can only presume your messages are in regard to meeting, thanks for your interest but I have all I require re the site, Happy Swinging, Red"

He deleted with no response... I am sure you can see why such rude and seemingly presumptuous messages could easily have been a delete from the first for most females.

On the plus side I often get very lovely thank you for responding messages too so there are lovely folk out there too.

Ohhh the fun of fab folks eh

This. Just be ruthless. Nice folks won't mind and not-so-nice folks are irrelevant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

Block.

I'm a good person tho and try not to use it. Always hopeful that they'll take the hint!!

If someone doesn't take the first hint then you owe them nothing. Being a good person has nothing to do with it if the other person isn't being good.

Harsh. Two strikes and then yer out

I had one message today saying

Him "you free"

Me "No but you're in Watford it's immaterial?"

Him "I work near you"

Me "Your messages are brief and uniformative but I can only presume your messages are in regard to meeting, thanks for your interest but I have all I require re the site, Happy Swinging, Red"

He deleted with no response... I am sure you can see why such rude and seemingly presumptuous messages could easily have been a delete from the first for most females.

On the plus side I often get very lovely thank you for responding messages too so there are lovely folk out there too.

Ohhh the fun of fab folks eh

This. Just be ruthless. Nice folks won't mind and not-so-nice folks are irrelevant. "

Lol I see what you mean and sometimes I am ruthless ... really rude ones get a block too but mostly I give the benefit but you're right re nice and not so nice folk, the nice ones always shine through

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"I've just deleted one unopened because despite 2 messages of 'thanks but....' he felt the need to send a third for something else. Delete button!! I find this happens quite a lot.

Block.

I'm a good person tho and try not to use it. Always hopeful that they'll take the hint!!

If someone doesn't take the first hint then you owe them nothing. Being a good person has nothing to do with it if the other person isn't being good.

Harsh. Two strikes and then yer out

I had one message today saying

Him "you free"

Me "No but you're in Watford it's immaterial?"

Him "I work near you"

Me "Your messages are brief and uniformative but I can only presume your messages are in regard to meeting, thanks for your interest but I have all I require re the site, Happy Swinging, Red"

He deleted with no response... I am sure you can see why such rude and seemingly presumptuous messages could easily have been a delete from the first for most females.

On the plus side I often get very lovely thank you for responding messages too so there are lovely folk out there too.

Ohhh the fun of fab folks eh

This. Just be ruthless. Nice folks won't mind and not-so-nice folks are irrelevant. "
spot on

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Treat people on here the same way you would in a pub or club

LOL

For 30 years I worked as a door steward and believe me majority of guys I've thrown out of pubs was because they were leg ends who didn't understand the concept of the word no, annoying women.

Yes I begin messages with Hi and their name My name is Rok and I feel like its corny and cheesy that I give up.

Contemplating going back to work where sex is on tap however as stayed by someone else above I don't drink nor do I take advantage. Having sex with a d*unk woman feels like rape.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Treat people on here the same way you would in a pub or club

LOL

For 30 years I worked as a door steward and believe me majority of guys I've thrown out of pubs was because they were leg ends who didn't understand the concept of the word no, annoying women.

Yes I begin messages with Hi and their name My name is Rok and I feel like its corny and cheesy that I give up.

Contemplating going back to work where sex is on tap however as stayed by someone else above I don't drink nor do I take advantage. Having sex with a d*unk woman feels like rape. "

Working in any environment with the public is an eye opener but when it's pubs and clubs it's something else... I am glad you see how vunerable women are to overbearing men but I do know that women are far from innocent in causing trouble too. I think decency is the word I am looking for... some have it some don't.

Red x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with women are far from innocent I've had my eyes open to a lot of goings on from them as well.

I worked briefly in early 80's as an erotic dancer, I did hen nights, Ann Summers parties etc and very nearly didn't live to tell the tale on a few occasions by d*unk women falling over themselves to get to the dancer.

However back to original post I also move around this site in ninja mode and read profiles etc before sending messages. Unfortunately for me and many like me the decent ladies on here have an upper age limit that sadly I will never see again

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hi everyone. What an interesting thread

I'm afraid my read and delete depends on my mood. Sometimes I feel chatty other times I'm just logged in to browse the forum or reply to a specific person as I might not have their phone number x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree with women are far from innocent I've had my eyes open to a lot of goings on from them as well.

Ninja mode is a gift we all love and use

As to the age limit... I think that's something easily overcome using the site in less diect ways... here for instance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree with women are far from innocent I've had my eyes open to a lot of goings on from them as well.

Ninja mode is a gift we all love and use

As to the age limit... I think that's something easily overcome using the site in less diect ways... here for instance

Grrr *direct bloomin' phone

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By *ostEligibleBachelorMan
over a year ago

—

I've been guilt of reading a message, and if she's not been my type, marking it as unread and just continuing as normal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree with women are far from innocent I've had my eyes open to a lot of goings on from them as well.

Ninja mode is a gift we all love and use

As to the age limit... I think that's something easily overcome using the site in less diect ways... here for instance

Grrr *direct bloomin' phone

LOL don't blame the phone it's an age thing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I agree with women are far from innocent I've had my eyes open to a lot of goings on from them as well.

Ninja mode is a gift we all love and use

As to the age limit... I think that's something easily overcome using the site in less diect ways... here for instance

Grrr *direct bloomin' phone

LOL don't blame the phone it's an age thing "

My phone isn't THAT old

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Did I say the phone was getting old

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Did I say the phone was getting old "

You surely weren't implying anything else was

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

C'est moi

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"C'est moi"

Vous mon cher

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