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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Fugy, son of Fugy, woke up happy (there's a joke there, but we'll leave it for now).
Today was a special day, Mrs Fugy, wife of Fugy and mother of Fugy, had promised her wayward gnomish boy a day at the seaside.
Fugy was so excited he decided to forego his bi-annual (another joke for another time) bath. He pulled on his favourite red velvet pantaloons, yellow gingham shirt, green waistcoat and red pointy hat.
He ran around inside his wadrobe and collected his red woollen speedos and his favourite beach towel. It was really one of his mother;s tea towels but she had kept this secret from him.
When he was ready he rushed downstairs to look for his mother. She told him he could bring a friend with him to the seaside. Oh wat a dilemma. Should he go back upstairs to his bedroom and wake big ears who was still sleeping soundly after a wild night of sexual athletics with Fugy. Or, should he run next door and ask Rover the Rhodesian Ridgeback?
No thought Fugy. he ran down to the bottom of the garden to his potting shed. he flung open the door and unchained drew Who Flung Dung, his Filipino houseboy,
"C'mon Drew you rascal, you're coming to the seaside!" cried Fugy.
Mrs Fugy parked the little yellow & red convertible and the beach and collected the picnic basket. Fugy skipped onto the beach carrying his Luis Vitton bag which contained his ever so skimpy, and dangerous, swimming costume.
Fugy wiggled into his trunks while Drew Who Flung Dung clinged onto Fugy's towel. Once he was changed Fugy ran towards the sea.
"Be careful!", cried Mrs Fugy, "The crabs might nip your knees."
Fugy ignored his mother and secretly hoped the crabs would nip at his nipples. He liked that.
Fugy ran into the water and started to doggy paddle in the rock pools. It was not long before he started to regret wearing his red wollen speedos. They quickly became water logged and started to drag him under.
Fugy's life flashed before his eyes, he saw the dog's home, all those sailors down at the harbour looking for company after months at sea. He even saw things yet to be, Big Ears and him down at the local registrar surrounded by family and friends for the civil ceremony, Rover sobbing at the back of the room....
Fugy realised that he would drown in that rock pool unless he took drastic action. He began to wave frantically as he bobbed up and down in the water. Mrs Fugy waved back at her wayward boy. drew lifted his head from between Mrs Fugy;s thighs and waved too before he was pulled back down.
Then, in the distance, Fugy saw something running towards him. it was abronzed, colourful, shiny figure gamboling across the sand.
"Never fear, View is here" sang the figure, "I'll save you little boy."
As View drew nearer he realised those short stubby legs did not belong to a boy. his eyes glinted mischeviously...
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