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Best status update you have ever seen on fab ??

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By *iesel89 OP   Man
over a year ago

West lothian

lots that I've seen but ......... " Jesus fuckin Christ I just got ruined ..... And got the gym in an hour fml " canny buy that kinda patter

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By *akedninjaMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

( user no longer available )

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 10/10/15 14:01:44]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NOT MEETING

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By *akedninjaMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

"not here for sex"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Please Stop Sending Friends Requests

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?

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By *oody2shoesWoman
over a year ago

dunbartonshire


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?"

always see this and think if it's directed at them and they know eh pm them lol

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

It was along the lines of.......What a pounding - still sore today

Really??? Waaaay too much information!

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By *rocMan
over a year ago

llandudno junction

England 25 - 28 Wales

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By *ntirelyuptoyouCouple
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Sister panties around my cock

I've never pressed block quite so fast!

Love the ones that say "need to empty my balls quick" always have me quivering with excitement

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By *inasparklesWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?"

I'm with you in this or the

Need my balls emptied pm me or

Who's sucking my cock or

Who's wanting fucked?

Yea guys that's exactly how to respect and treat a lady! My guess is they are still waiting!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I post statues all the time.

One that made me laugh was.

No statues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Saw a few from a poster who was saying she was going to the After Eight with her auntie!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like my one

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By *urray MintMan
over a year ago

Brewtoon

Seen one a couple of months ago .

I'm off to shave my pussy before my meet !!!

#tomuchinfononeed lol

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

Oh gotta love the flood of "I've got hangover horn,who's gonna sort me" ect statuses on a Sunday morning. How I've not grabbed my car keys and drove off at high speed to assist them I don't know!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh gotta love the flood of "I've got hangover horn,who's gonna sort me" ect statuses on a Sunday morning. How I've not grabbed my car keys and drove off at high speed to assist them I don't know! "

Bless them lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to make mine funny..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?"

Attention seeking, they want people to see they've had a meet.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh gotta love the flood of "I've got hangover horn,who's gonna sort me" ect statuses on a Sunday morning. How I've not grabbed my car keys and drove off at high speed to assist them I don't know! "

Such will-power .

Think the best status I've seen recently was something like "ooh that was a big winky". Had a giggle at that.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"could do with some fun tonight, ah well will have to make do with hubby instead"

a genuine status on here one time

mr

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh gotta love the flood of "I've got hangover horn,who's gonna sort me" ect statuses on a Sunday morning. How I've not grabbed my car keys and drove off at high speed to assist them I don't know! "

Sake, I thought that was a sure fire way to attract the ladies....

#updatingmystatusasyoureadthis

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews


""could do with some fun tonight, ah well will have to make do with hubby instead"

a genuine status on here one time

mr"

Bet hubby was most appreciative

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

"Free all day, tel no xxxx" Good luck with that one, mate

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By *oobsandballsMan
over a year ago

st andrews

Today's local updates contain gems such as:

"Any guys wanting sucked off? Can travel" - desperate

"need a wet pussy" - also desperate, will shag anything

and the typical "you know who you are" - and the rest of us don't care

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"England 25 - 28 Wales "

Class lolol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just read "pussy required tonight"! Really? Total turn off!

R

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lot of status updates have me reaching for the block button. I've got a few people on my hotlist purely for their status updates.

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By *exyasMan
over a year ago

glasgow


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?

I'm with you in this or the

Need my balls emptied pm me or

Who's sucking my cock or

Who's wanting fucked?

Yea guys that's exactly how to respect and treat a lady! My guess is they are still waiting! "

please! Any females on this can be called a lot of things but a lady is not one of them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

For me the annoying status's are,

Not here to meet anyone

Only here to chat to old friends

& mostly all the other above answers

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?

I'm with you in this or the

Need my balls emptied pm me or

Who's sucking my cock or

Who's wanting fucked?

Yea guys that's exactly how to respect and treat a lady! My guess is they are still waiting! please! Any females on this can be called a lot of things but a lady is not one of them "

Oh really? That statement young man says more about yourself than any of the "females" on here. Believe me, I am a lady and I know a gentleman when I see one too!!

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By *wiftieeMan
over a year ago

near Glasgow


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?

Attention seeking, they want people to see they've had a meet. "

Even when they haven't, even more hilarious!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 11/10/15 22:06:44]

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"need someone to suck me before the mrs gets home".....

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By *ifes journeyCouple
over a year ago

scotland


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?

I'm with you in this or the

Need my balls emptied pm me or

Who's sucking my cock or

Who's wanting fucked?

Yea guys that's exactly how to respect and treat a lady! My guess is they are still waiting! please! Any females on this can be called a lot of things but a lady is not one of them "

And you base this generalisation on what ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Was noseying through the meets once an I saw "need my cock milked tonight"

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By *lixerMan
over a year ago

Glasgow

I'm just emerging so don't shoot me down if I'm in the wrong here. But I've really enjoyed reading this thread. It's nice to see that some folk have more than one functioning organ!

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)


""You know who you are"

Annoys the shite out of me.

Why do morons put this up?

I'm with you in this or the

Need my balls emptied pm me or

Who's sucking my cock or

Who's wanting fucked?

Yea guys that's exactly how to respect and treat a lady! My guess is they are still waiting! please! Any females on this can be called a lot of things but a lady is not one of them

Oh really? That statement young man says more about yourself than any of the "females" on here. Believe me, I am a lady and I know a gentleman when I see one too!! "

Well said!

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By *ingerTwistWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I really hate the ones that go "are there any gen women on here?"

Or

"This site is a waste of time. Fakes".

But made me laugh recently ..

"Worried you've been abducted by aliens ? Let me probe your bum and jog your memory"

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk


"I really hate the ones that go "are there any gen women on here?"

Or

"This site is a waste of time. Fakes".

But made me laugh recently ..

"Worried you've been abducted by aliens ? Let me probe your bum and jog your memory" "

At least the last one shows some effort and the ability to have a laugh

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east


"I really hate the ones that go "are there any gen women on here?"

Or

"This site is a waste of time. Fakes".

But made me laugh recently ..

"Worried you've been abducted by aliens ? Let me probe your bum and jog your memory"

At least the last one shows some effort and the ability to have a laugh "

Wasnt yours then ? Lmao

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By *he feckersCouple
over a year ago

rosyth

Personal fave at the moment been on for a Cple of days " This site is disgusting Can't wait to leave this place " so tempted to message and say why post this why not just do one and fuck off ya twat lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Personal fave at the moment been on for a Cple of days " This site is disgusting Can't wait to leave this place " so tempted to message and say why post this why not just do one and fuck off ya twat lol "

Been seeing that for the past few weeks from the same people lol so tempted to tell them to fook off of here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Free from 4pm ... Wife at work

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"( user no longer available ) "

The best status by far

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Saw 1 a while back that made me laugh....."accommodate us (fuck buddy couple both married) and we'll let you watch"

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By *inasparklesWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Or 'leaving this place see ya' and there still here! Fooking numptys looking for a response X

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Or the "im out of here when my subscription ends " then cpl days later same user renews site supporter pass lol

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By *inasparklesWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Or the "im out of here when my subscription ends " then cpl days later same user renews site supporter pass lol "

Pmsl

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Seen a few asking guys to send them codes to renew their site passes too

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Or the "only VVVWE need apply " just makes me think ...bucket fanny

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By *exyasMan
over a year ago

glasgow

Il put my bullet proof vest on before I get shot down for this one lol here goes

"Can't play this week I'm on my period" il say no more!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Or the "only VVVWE need apply " just makes me think ...bucket fanny "

Or ask if it's like throwing a sausage up a close

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Will donate 50 quid for sweaty socks at bonnyrigg toilets 10:30am"

haha!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Somebodyhad a meet and is feeling happy.

You would pay to meet a guy who sounds likr a piper but s and n may be on cards and slap one into the c.o.m

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By *ostEligibleBachelorMan
over a year ago

"My wife has g cup tits"

Been quiet recently but that status recurred every day for about 3 months not so long ago lol.

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By *vanabeusedTV/TS
over a year ago

somewhere

Not a status but my favourite name ever was Spank Sinatra !

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By *oneythiefMan
over a year ago

Perthshire

Deleting this app unless I get a shag

Eh Yeh that's going to work lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"England 25 - 28 Wales "

love it !!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 19/10/15 13:21:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think ive just seen the worst in my local newsfeed

Wont say what it is as im probably not allowed to single something out but you should all check out glasgow men 25-33

Not sure if he thought it would be impressive or not

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By *ab femWoman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I laugh at the guys trying to pretend to be their girlfriend.

'Who wants to fuck my boyfriend while I'm at work'

Yeah alright then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I laugh at the guys trying to pretend to be their girlfriend.

'Who wants to fuck my boyfriend while I'm at work'

Yeah alright then "

You mean they are not really the girlfriend

Ive fallen for this one 5 times already

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By *lawless doveWoman
over a year ago

bothwell

The "think it's time to leave" status from people who haven't been on for weeks

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

mine are so boring... It's either going to the footie or going to hospital!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sure I seen one where someone was singing "my heart was broken,my heart was broken",

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston


"I'm sure I seen one where someone was singing "my heart was broken,my heart was broken", "

Naw, was on my way from misery to happiness... Their HEARTS were broken.. 190512...

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By *irtyGirlWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Please don't stir the pot ladies.

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By *pinCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Cow Moolester"

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By *ab femWoman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

Who will let me do them up the shitter

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