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Memoirs of a married man

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Joining fab was a decision that was not taken lightly.

When I assessed my sexual desires and released that if I wanted to part take in some of my fantasies then cheating would have to be involved.

Even though a conscious effort was taken over the past three years to convince my wife that we should experiment with our sex lives.

This suggestion was met with resistance on a number of occasions, so here I am.

What did I expect to find on fab, that's the interesting part.

I've have sent messages to couples and females with mixed reaction.

Some members are disgusted that I would do such a thing, and if I'm honest I can see their point of _iew.

Others are in the same position and have been honest and polite in their correspondence.

Even though we are basically on a website for sexual experiences, the differences in attitudes has been somewhat refreshing.

My profile was set up to allow all members to see exactly what I am, I could say being honest is paramount but let's be honest I'm on here to cheat on my wife.

When we constantly think about our primal desires it's difficult not to give into them, or even be curious regarding what could potentially happen.

I have enjoyed the banter had with some members and take no offence to others who are put off with my private life. Which is the beauty of the website, everyone is so different.

I have read the few posts on the forum and do expect the usual suspects to come and take the piss, actually looking forward to a bit of banter.

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge

[Removed by poster at 07/07/15 13:48:45]

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge

At least you are honest....to a point we only have your word that you are in a sexless marriage.we only have your word that the subject has been broached with your wife.so many married folk who cheat have a sob story and if all were to be believed the world must be a really dark place. Im sure your partners reality is very diffrent from yours otherwise imo there would be alot more talk and resolutions (even if that ment you split).as for base desires we all have them some CHOOSE to give into them. others choose to hold to their commitment. Unfortunatly I am opinionated and dont mind voicing them others will say live and let live.im sure I will be shouted down with dont judge so on so forth but its human nature some choose to cheat I choose to speak out

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Kola your absolutely right in what your saying, your only getting one side of the story.

And respect your point of _iew on the topic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Joining fab was a decision that was not taken lightly.

When I assessed my sexual desires and released that if I wanted to part take in some of my fantasies then cheating would have to be involved.

Even though a conscious effort was taken over the past three years to convince my wife that we should experiment with our sex lives.

This suggestion was met with resistance on a number of occasions, so here I am.

What did I expect to find on fab, that's the interesting part.

I've have sent messages to couples and females with mixed reaction.

Some members are disgusted that I would do such a thing, and if I'm honest I can see their point of _iew.

Others are in the same position and have been honest and polite in their correspondence.

Even though we are basically on a website for sexual experiences, the differences in attitudes has been somewhat refreshing.

My profile was set up to allow all members to see exactly what I am, I could say being honest is paramount but let's be honest I'm on here to cheat on my wife.

When we constantly think about our primal desires it's difficult not to give into them, or even be curious regarding what could potentially happen.

I have enjoyed the banter had with some members and take no offence to others who are put off with my private life. Which is the beauty of the website, everyone is so different.

I have read the few posts on the forum and do expect the usual suspects to come and take the piss, actually looking forward to a bit of banter.

Sir

You do whatever you think is the right thing to do,not anyone's business but yours,yes,for sure you will be judged by others,nobody should be judging you for your honesty.

Just my opinion Sir

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I first joined I was in a sexless not even any feelings between us.

First thing is honesty & being up front with folk you are married.

Some people don't approve others will you are never going to get everyone the same

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Mix randy I know I will probably be shot down in flames but the topic was approached a number of times and very carefully at that.

Does that excuse me for being here, probably not.

Difficult situation.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you, that's what's great about this site is the difference in opinions x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm perhaps missing something here, but what is the purpose of the thread? Gauging opinion on what you're doing?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm perhaps missing something here, but what is the purpose of the thread? Gauging opinion on what you're doing?"

It's was more of what I had experienced from being in the site and the difference of personalities in relation to being approached by a married man.

How some may find it frustrating and annoying however I have found it refreshing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

is this basically someone trying to defend the reason they cheat??

probably best explaining it to your missus instead of trying to paint yourself as a guy that has no option but to cheat!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Read your initial post and your profile, from what I read, your loveless marriage isn't due to a physical or illness problem (as you have tries to convince her over the years to play).

So, my thinking is, if there is no love in the marriage then why go on with it?

you are obviously not happy with it, I suspect your wife will be the same, and if any kids don't think for one minute they don't detect something is up.

I was in a marriage that was going down that route so we parted. I now feel so much better, my ex also feels better, she then re-married and then again divorced but she must have had fun and excitement during that time.

Why live in a loveless marriage, does no one any good on either side, and don't for one minute try and say its for the kids (if kids are involved) as they will survive regardless.

I guess as you say you have sat and considered this, so also consider the possibility or taking a nasty STD back him with you, or getting involved with a "crazy" woman who decides to follow you home and knock on your door

sometimes its easier to clean up your initial shit before starting afresh

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

sorry for couple of spelling mistakes above

Wish we had an edit button for spelling mistakes, its only one sentence of code to create one

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Read your initial post and your profile, from what I read, your loveless marriage isn't due to a physical or illness problem (as you have tries to convince her over the years to play).

So, my thinking is, if there is no love in the marriage then why go on with it?

you are obviously not happy with it, I suspect your wife will be the same, and if any kids don't think for one minute they don't detect something is up.

I was in a marriage that was going down that route so we parted. I now feel so much better, my ex also feels better, she then re-married and then again divorced but she must have had fun and excitement during that time.

Why live in a loveless marriage, does no one any good on either side, and don't for one minute try and say its for the kids (if kids are involved) as they will survive regardless.

I guess as you say you have sat and considered this, so also consider the possibility or taking a nasty STD back him with you, or getting involved with a "crazy" woman who decides to follow you home and knock on your door

sometimes its easier to clean up your initial shit before starting afresh"

I appreciate the time you have taken to write your opinion and you have made a number of excellent points.

Especially ehen discussing std and crazy females.

However, do you think that even though I'm unhappy with my sex life means I don't love my wife?

I suppose being here a number of you will argue I don't, I care to disagree.

As Kola posted at beginning, one side of the story, and also the story is too complicated to go into.

Is it possible to still love your partner and chest on them, that's a bloody good question.

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Read your initial post and your profile, from what I read, your loveless marriage isn't due to a physical or illness problem (as you have tries to convince her over the years to play).

So, my thinking is, if there is no love in the marriage then why go on with it?

you are obviously not happy with it, I suspect your wife will be the same, and if any kids don't think for one minute they don't detect something is up.

I was in a marriage that was going down that route so we parted. I now feel so much better, my ex also feels better, she then re-married and then again divorced but she must have had fun and excitement during that time.

Why live in a loveless marriage, does no one any good on either side, and don't for one minute try and say its for the kids (if kids are involved) as they will survive regardless.

I guess as you say you have sat and considered this, so also consider the possibility or taking a nasty STD back him with you, or getting involved with a "crazy" woman who decides to follow you home and knock on your door

sometimes its easier to clean up your initial shit before starting afresh"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"is this basically someone trying to defend the reason they cheat??

probably best explaining it to your missus instead of trying to paint yourself as a guy that has no option but to cheat!"

At what point I have tried to defend myself, if anything I have been critical of my potential actions.

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By *entralscotscpl7Couple
over a year ago

Falkirk

It's an open form hun. Everyone will have there own opinion and _iews which will either agree or disagree with what you have posted.

You must be in a very difficult situation but as many have said if it's affecting you this much maybe it's time to to cut yourself loose.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"1; However, do you think that even though I'm unhappy with my sex life means I don't love my wife?

2; one side of the story, and also the story is too complicated to go into.

3;Is it possible to still love your partner and chest on them, "

1; I expect everyone has a love for a partner whether old or new but with love comes respect

2; to complicated!!! try us, many on here have all day, every day and many have survived some nightmare points in life

3; Yes It is possible to love a partner and cheat on them but when you are doing it, you are throwing all these years of love & respect right out of the window, if anyone thinks its okay to love someone and cheat on them then sit down with your loved one and tell them that, after all its love so im sure they would understand

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By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

It's always best to retain the dignity of the absent partner, they may not want their situation discussed with strangers on the Internet.

And just get on with any shagging.

Good luck

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

The endorphine junkie!!!

This cheater craves the emotional excitement that comes with discovering, desiring, and seducing a new partner something that could very well be lacking in their relationship.

I've heard every story in the book for cheating but from listening to many the biggest majority simply do it because their sex life at home is according to them boring and their partners just ain't up for being more adventurous in the bedroom.

Some ain't having sex at all and for others they are just greedy f*****s lol.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If it isn't loveless but it's a sexless marriage, have you put any effort in to getting to the bottom of the problem instead of creating more in the near future?

There's a very high chance your wife will find out and I really feel for your wife at the end of the day. And no doubt there's kids involved as well.

Marriage councillors do a good job these days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You should be upfront about it on here. I personally don't care what people get up to, it's none of my concern. Although, if an attached man disguises wife/partner/kids just to get his leg over he is likely to feel my wrath (one did recently). I do not want to unknowingly put myself in the position of hurting another person or worse still the cause of a marriage breaking up. It's not nice at all. Honesty is the best policy!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everybody will be judged by everyone else might as well do what makes you happy

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By *ensual temptressWoman
over a year ago

Southampton

Sorry you say you love her but actions speak louder than words . You chose to put your fantasy's before your relationship. Your on here and may get the sex you want ..but is that worth gambling everything you have with her? Your here so guess you already answered that .

You are only in affect treating the symptoms of your problems not the cause of the issue . As said maybe wiser to sort one problem before creating whole load of new ones . If it can't be resolved between the two of you better two then go your separate ways with dignity,rather than under a cloud of deceat and recriminations when she finds out .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The guy is clearly articulate. So this puts him into the fab 1%ers. He still hasnt had a meet.

My guess is he is struggling with his conscience?

Hopefully the opinions of people on the matter will help him come to a decision. Whether that be to stay or go in his marriage. Play or not play.

Good luck with your turmoil. But remember there are (at least) two of you who are struggling in the relationship.

Culturally we are funny in the uk. Perhaps you should just learn french and make sure you have high hygiene where your extra cirricular activities are concerned!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Very much as I expected, a variety of opinions.

Most with excellent points that have offered food for thought.

When that primal instinct for sex kicks in the logical brain forgets the people we could hurt the most, which I know some may find hard to believe but was never my intention.

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By *ola cubesMan
over a year ago

coatbridge

"Very much as I expected, a variety of opinions.

Most with excellent points that have offered food for thought.

When that primal instinct for sex kicks in the logical brain forgets the people we could hurt the most, which I know some may find hard to believe but was never my intention.

"
when that primal instinct kicks in we can ignore it thats what makes us higher evolved beings. Saying the logical brain forgets couldnt be further from the truth.you weigh up the situation and decide feek it I want sex to say anything else is just an excuse.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You're on here for your reasons . At least you're upfront and honest about your situation. You're not trying to deceive anyone you may potentially meet you've said you thought about it before deciding to join up and your wife chose not to . That means that anyone who may consider meeting with you has an informed choice. There are liars cheats judges attention seekers , both males and females who enjoy the thrill of the chase . People who will say anything and do anything to get what they want. People who are doing a lot worse or similar to you so as long as you are clear in your head and your conscience allows you to do so then use the site as you see fit . What others think of you isn't your business and how you use the site isn't theirs . I get you only wanted to share your experience as it's an "open forum" to do so some might nod their heads and say it's good to see an honest story . Some might judge and come to their own conclusions. Everyone has a _iew and an opinion be it good bad or indifferent It's you cheating, no one else . What matters is that you are doing what's right for you . The same as everyone else here is on for their own reasons . Good luck op .

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"You're on here for your reasons . At least you're upfront and honest about your situation. You're not trying to deceive anyone you may potentially meet you've said you thought about it before deciding to join up and your wife chose not to . That means that anyone who may consider meeting with you has an informed choice. There are liars cheats judges attention seekers , both males and females who enjoy the thrill of the chase . People who will say anything and do anything to get what they want. People who are doing a lot worse or similar to you so as long as you are clear in your head and your conscience allows you to do so then use the site as you see fit . What others think of you isn't your business and how you use the site isn't theirs . I get you only wanted to share your experience as it's an "open forum" to do so some might nod their heads and say it's good to see an honest story . Some might judge and come to their own conclusions. Everyone has a _iew and an opinion be it good bad or indifferent It's you cheating, no one else . What matters is that you are doing what's right for you . The same as everyone else here is on for their own reasons . Good luck op .

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You're on here for your reasons . At least you're upfront and honest about your situation. You're not trying to deceive anyone you may potentially meet you've said you thought about it before deciding to join up and your wife chose not to . That means that anyone who may consider meeting with you has an informed choice. There are liars cheats judges attention seekers , both males and females who enjoy the thrill of the chase . People who will say anything and do anything to get what they want. People who are doing a lot worse or similar to you so as long as you are clear in your head and your conscience allows you to do so then use the site as you see fit . What others think of you isn't your business and how you use the site isn't theirs . I get you only wanted to share your experience as it's an "open forum" to do so some might nod their heads and say it's good to see an honest story . Some might judge and come to their own conclusions. Everyone has a _iew and an opinion be it good bad or indifferent It's you cheating, no one else . What matters is that you are doing what's right for you . The same as everyone else here is on for their own reasons . Good luck op .

"

Well said Shelley

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By *overocketoneMan
over a year ago

aberdeen

I can see this post perhaps maybe being made into a film????

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