FabSwingers.com forum: Double standards?

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

So i reguarly attend CJs

Recently had a conversation with someone who goes, not naming names and hes not on here anyway, and he thinks CJs is just amazing, which it is, but he also said he wouldnt have a gf that went coz "you know what theyre like" and also when i made a comment about being treated like a puppet i was told what do u expect when u come to a place like this.

So is this a normal way of thinking for single guys? Happy enough to have fun but class girls who go there in some sort of category. Some guys moan about girlfriends when they are boring with regards to sex but then when they get a female thats open minded suddenly thats all shes good for?

I do not understand this at all

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's that age old premise (and completely wrong and bang out if order in my opinion) that a guy can shag 100 women and he's a stud or a hero, but if a woman does it she's a slut. Total double standards and guys who think like this really want to take a king hard look at themselves

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uttyMan
over a year ago

Local to you maybe

Don't think all single guys think that way, or all guys in general.

Some people are unfortunately that way of thinking, treat woman as a sex object

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *vbride1963TV/TS
over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow

Definitely double standards A guy with multiple partners is sowing his wild oats while a gal with multiple partners is a slag it's not really fair

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Just the comment when i was told "what do u expect to be treated like if u come to a place like this"

Bit uncalled for, i expect nothing short of respect no matter where i go, and wont apologise for being open minded and fun with regards to sex

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am sorry you had that conversation but I think the guy was just a jerk,

Just a plain case of double standards.

The few times I have been to CJ's the ladies have been brilliant. Maybe the guy just cant be classed as a real swinger.

I would have been annoyed if I had heard his comments the last time I was there with my lovely friend.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I am sorry you had that conversation but I think the guy was just a jerk,

Just a plain case of double standards.

The few times I have been to CJ's the ladies have been brilliant. Maybe the guy just cant be classed as a real swinger.

I would have been annoyed if I had heard his comments the last time I was there with my lovely friend."

Silly thing is i played with him again as i did the last time, too much drink perhaps, suppose its my own fault but that should be the last if thats really what he thinks of girls who attend cjs

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

My point being: if u think cjs and stuff like that is that amazing surely u wouldnt then just want a "normal" gf who isnt into anything beyond vanilla, just seems pointless

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reminds me of a social meet I had with a guy

I asked if he had a girlfriend would he let her swing... No way!!!! Was his reply lol

Needless to say we never went any further lol

Double standards come in all shapes

Like the cpls that only let 1 play ie... You can have sex with the guy but font touch his mrs ... Or the cpls that have sex with other cpls but they can't kiss anyone lol

Everyone is different and have different ways if thinking I suppose ?

Could argue they mental folk that say prostitutes can't get raped or husbands can't rape their wives

Some folk are just plain dillusional

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I also think it is a matter of respect.

I went to cj's one afternoon with a friend and intend to go to a fun for all with the same lady soon, I treat everyone I meet with and as I already stated if I had heard the guy making those kind of comments about my friend I would have taken it as he was disrespecting my partner.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I also think it is a matter of respect.

Hes only early 20s though so probably one reason, quite immature, suppose it is quite disrespectful

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Reminds me of a social meet I had with a guy

I asked if he had a girlfriend would he let her swing... No way!!!! Was his reply lol

Needless to say we never went any further lol

Double standards come in all shapes

Like the cpls that only let 1 play ie... You can have sex with the guy but font touch his mrs ... Or the cpls that have sex with other cpls but they can't kiss anyone lol

Everyone is different and have different ways if thinking I suppose ?

Could argue they mental folk that say prostitutes can't get raped or husbands can't rape their wives

Some folk are just plain dillusional

This boy also made the comment of not sharing his gf if he had one lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *abrina59TV/TS
over a year ago

moved to cuckold land

Coco you should have shown him which window he would be leaving through xx

Maybe we should make sure he stays at home next time and his gf comes along to see what he so seems to like about the place

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Reminds me of a social meet I had with a guy

I asked if he had a girlfriend would he let her swing... No way!!!! Was his reply lol

Needless to say we never went any further lol

Double standards come in all shapes

Like the cpls that only let 1 play ie... You can have sex with the guy but font touch his mrs ... Or the cpls that have sex with other cpls but they can't kiss anyone lol

Everyone is different and have different ways if thinking I suppose ?

Could argue they mental folk that say prostitutes can't get raped or husbands can't rape their wives

Some folk are just plain dillusional

This boy also made the comment of not sharing his gf if he had one lol

"
you have hit the nail on the head .... BOY being the right word

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Coco you should have shown him which window he would be leaving through xx

Maybe we should make sure he stays at home next time and his gf comes along to see what he so seems to like about the place"

Hahahaha, hes not got a gf

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

definite double standards, its rife.

I've had couples where I can only have sex with him, and no toys on her - because shes not the type of girl to be fucked by anyone, and only play with single fems as "his missus was better than that"

Also, I get a few odd comments about my partner letting me play but not being into the scene (he's definitely not a cuck either)

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"definite double standards, its rife.

I've had couples where I can only have sex with him, and no toys on her - because shes not the type of girl to be fucked by anyone, and only play with single fems as "his missus was better than that"

Also, I get a few odd comments about my partner letting me play but not being into the scene (he's definitely not a cuck either) "

Hahaha its crazy

Well i probably wont be back at cjs sad to say, as long as immature little boys are there

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

Aw but if you like it, why don't you go back and just ignore the sad little boy.

Don't let him spoil your fun!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's totally hypocritical the attitude shown. Basically everyone should be able to do what they like without being judged ( unless illegal of course )

The guys a complete knobber....

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

He is not worth your time and effort move on and keep been yourself and enjoy life xx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eatherWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

so the gentleman and i se tha word very loosly wouldnt let any girl friend of his come on this site well what the feck is he doing on here oh yes hes showing his total ignorance and disrespect for females on here HOW DARE HE make such a statement and as for the comment a bout cj,s and females on here i am my own person i got to cj,s but i aint a slag if i ever ever get to meet the 2 men in question they better have a good pair of running shoes on or they wont be able to run at all after ive finished with them

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eatherWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

oh and by the way i am one of the most mild mannered persons you could ever meet just dont ever ever get me angry or disrepsect me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/07/14 07:56:08]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eatherWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

i see this PERSON was at cj,s on Saturday amd i totally agree he is one of the most if not the most rude ignorant person i have ever known

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Where did he think that he was...some Edinburgh massage parlour?

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eatherWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

so it must be ok for him to go to as he says it an over rated sex haunt Which i can assure him cj,s certainly aint the hostes is one of the mst nices and loveliest peple i have had the pleasure of knowing

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My next girlfriend will have to be a swinger, open-minded and not possessive. I love sex and would expect my partner to share my passions. Years of a non sexual marriage taught me life's too short to stand around waiting so I would be absolutely delighted if a girl told me she goes to swingers clubs.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

[Removed by poster at 28/07/14 08:29:03]

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never been but hope to go and meet the LADIES who attend, some of whom I know already as friends and they are most certainly LADIES!!!!!!!!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eatherWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

Of course he is View but also so am i and he blatantly smacks of double standard and not very nice ones at that But i wonder is this his warped idea of fun winding every one up

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Of course he is View but also so am i and he blatantly smacks of double standard and not very nice ones at that But i wonder is this his warped idea of fun winding every one up "

sorry Heather, I deleted mine as his comment was removed. For sure, it would cause angst but I know from other threads, it is a _iew that is shared.

all the best

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Of course he is View but also so am i and he blatantly smacks of double standard and not very nice ones at that But i wonder is this his warped idea of fun winding every one up "

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eatherWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

you as well _iew how are the Boys give them a clap and a cuddle from me

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Aw but if you like it, why don't you go back and just ignore the sad little boy.

Don't let him spoil your fun!"

Ano, well its just not the company i want to be around when am there tbh, immature little boys running around with too much testosterone, with attitudes like that

Ive been annoyed all day yesterday with one of them and its not worth going if thats how its gona make me feel

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"My next girlfriend will have to be a swinger, open-minded and not possessive. I love sex and would expect my partner to share my passions. Years of a non sexual marriage taught me life's too short to stand around waiting so I would be absolutely delighted if a girl told me she goes to swingers clubs."

This is what i dont get, the comment about not having a gf who went there etc coz u know what there like, aye u know what theyr like bloody great fun

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"you as well _iew how are the Boys give them a clap and a cuddle from me

I will Heather, they are great thanks.

You see many posts from females who are on dating sites and Fab, they clealry state that when they do meet a guy they will not be on a swinging site. Mostly, they don't slag off the people on here but they do judge some couples for swinging. They would never share their partner but are happy to share a couple.

Different _iews, without the need to be disingenuous

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never been to a club but really fancy trying it sometime this guy is so disrespectful to not only the women but also the lifestyle and is obviously just using the club as a way to a quick shag instead of putting in the effort and getting the most out of the experience he's giving all us single guys a bad name please ladies don't tar us all with the same brush there's some right assholes of guys out there but there's also some true genuine guys out there.

Looking to get a chance and the more guys like this there are make it near impossible for the rest of us to get taken seriously

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"I have never been to a club but really fancy trying it sometime this guy is so disrespectful to not only the women but also the lifestyle and is obviously just using the club as a way to a quick shag instead of putting in the effort and getting the most out of the experience "

what is wrong with going to a club just for a shag ?

I agree there is no need to be disingenuous about other people who attend, but it is still NSA sex for some.

They shouldn't be condemned

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *erverts R usCouple
over a year ago

Stirling

I think its called respect

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I think its called respect"

Distinct lack thereof from some single guys on here unfortunately!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"I think its called respect"

for all

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"I think its called respect"

True, and i got disrespected right to my face and its not what i expect from going there as its usually a lovely atmosphere

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *erverts R usCouple
over a year ago

Stirling

Too right respect for yourself and associated perverts goes a long way especially when you can be descreet also as I find lifes very much a swings and roundabout ride and Karma kicks like a bitch

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

"Too right respect for yourself and associated perverts goes a long way especially when you can be descreet also as I find lifes very much a swings and roundabout ride and Karma kicks like a bitch

that is very true. That goes for the disrespectful in all categories. I have seen women refer to some other woman on here as the Fab bikes. Just because you attend a certain cub, respect is not guaranteed within that community. People reap what they sow.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *uttyMan
over a year ago

Local to you maybe

Respect and discretion tend to fade away from some when they get what they want, get bored or don't get what they want.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *erverts R usCouple
over a year ago

Stirling

Then you be civil lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *-and-LCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

In fairness to Coco the same person she refers to was also extremely disrespectful to my wife later that night, however it was dealt with at the time by our host. I guess in all walks of life you get rude people and the swinging community is no different. However we've met so many fantastic people, a number of whom we are now proud to call friends, that it far outweighs anything else. Just don't take it personally, you know yourself better than anyone and that's what counts. Rise above it and whatever you do don't let it spoil something you enjoy.

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just a silly wee boy!! The next partner I have would need to accept I enjoy group sex, 3sums, girly time etc & hopefully play too but this doesn't make me a slut just someone who enjoys myself sexually

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just a silly wee boy!! The next partner I have would need to accept I enjoy group sex, 3sums, girly time etc & hopefully play too but this doesn't make me a slut just someone who enjoys myself sexually

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Spot on

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *eatherWoman
over a year ago

glasgow

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spot on

And your next partner should feel privileged that you have chosen to make him your partner and join in

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spot on

And your next partner should feel privileged that you have chosen to make him your partner and join in "

Lol I'm honest so they would know from day 1 the way I am & it would obviously be his choice if it was the kind of lifestyle he would want to join with x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

Spot on

And your next partner should feel privileged that you have chosen to make him your partner and join in "

My partner doesn't want to join in, but is happy for me to have this side of my life, and to explore and enjoy it, so joining in might not be necessary if the understanding is there.

I did actually get told off the other day for not doing much with this part of my life for a while, and that I should get off my arse and meet again lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *aucy MikeCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Never been to CJs (so far) but idiots like that would put me off and if the club's not up for barring them .... Sx

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spot on

And your next partner should feel privileged that you have chosen to make him your partner and join in

My partner doesn't want to join in, but is happy for me to have this side of my life, and to explore and enjoy it, so joining in might not be necessary if the understanding is there.

I did actually get told off the other day for not doing much with this part of my life for a while, and that I should get off my arse and meet again lol"

Even that would work for me x

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ee-YinWoman
over a year ago

nr bathgate

"Just the comment when i was told "what do u expect to be treated like if u come to a place like this"

Bit uncalled for, i expect nothing short of respect no matter where i go, and wont apologise for being open minded and fun with regards to sex

I'd have slapped him!!

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *ee-YinWoman
over a year ago

nr bathgate

"Never been to CJs (so far) but idiots like that would put me off and if the club's not up for barring them .... Sx"

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I think the swinging lifestyle is healthy for couples. Sex and love are two different emotions. IMO at least lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

By *othingButCocoChanel OP Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Just the comment when i was told "what do u expect to be treated like if u come to a place like this"

Bit uncalled for, i expect nothing short of respect no matter where i go, and wont apologise for being open minded and fun with regards to sex

I'd have slapped him!!

I shuda lol

Reply privately

Reply in forum

Reply +quote

Post new Message to Thread