FabSwingers.com forum: a plea

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I've had the shittest day ever who wants to cheer me up?? With a joke or something or funny quotes please please oh please

Xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There is every chance you could be the winning bid

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you call an elephant in a phone box?

......Stuck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do i call a dwarf in cement mixer ......

A wee hard man

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"What do i call a dwarf in cement mixer ......

A wee hard man

"
oi f$&k off you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Id love to tell a joke but id probably get banned lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Id love to tell a joke but id probably get banned lmao

"
again

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By *omma49Man
over a year ago

GLASGOW

Did you hear about the guy who took viagra the night before and woke up next morning with a stiff neck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A man walked into a bar .... ouch!!

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By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

I would but my humour only works face to face. X X X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A report has found that one in ten people is gay.

i had sex with ten people.

and it really creeps me out cause it means one of those blokes was gay

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By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

Cheek to cheek

futtock to futtock x X X

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A man walked into a bar .... ouch!!"

Pmsl sounds like me entering a bar cause I've been too d*unk

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There are 2 cows in a field

Which one is on holiday?

The 1 with the wee calf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"A man walked into a bar .... ouch!!

Pmsl sounds like me entering a bar cause I've been too d*unk

could be worse, could have a del boy moment and lean against it when it's not there x

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By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

. .we count our dollars on the train.

to the partee

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By *ScotsmanMan
over a year ago

ayrshire

"There are 2 cows in a field

Which one is on holiday?

The 1 with the wee calf

"
like it

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By *ary_ArgyllMan
over a year ago

Argyll

Hear about the dyslexic who walked into a bra

No offence intended to any dyslexics out there

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By *dub67Man
over a year ago

glasgow

"Hear about the dyslexic who walked into a bra

No offence intended to any dyslexics out there"

None taken

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How meny tickles does it take to make a octopus laugh????? Ten tickles!!!! Hehehe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How meny tickles does it take to make a octopus laugh????? Ten tickles!!!! Hehehe"

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By *icentious.LibertineWoman
over a year ago

Falkirk

Why can't you tell when a pterodactyl is going to the toilet?

'Cos it has a silent 'P'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wayne Rooney has announced "I'm going to deliver in Brazil".

Didn't know they had pizza hut over there

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are 2 cows in a field

Which one is on holiday?

The 1 with the wee calf

10 cows in a field. Which one is closest to Iran??

Kuwait

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By *il_Lou90Woman
over a year ago

falkirk

This chinese proverb always cheers me up....

Man who walk through airport door sideways surely going to bangkok

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are 2 cows in a field

Which one is on holiday?

Lol x had to think a mo x thank god for my Scottish roots

Pmsl x

The 1 with the wee calf

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There are 2 cows in a field

Which one is on holiday?

The 1 with the wee calf

10 cows in a field. Which one is closest to Iran??

Kuwait

"
pronounced coo 8 !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Confusias say

Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

To whom it may concern.....

Will you please stop photoshopping your pictures because if you ever go missing we'll be looking for Beyoncé instead of chewbacca

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

How do you keep an idiot in suspense?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"?"

Pmsl

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Oh I think I've been had he's so for it!!!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"?"

oops fell for that one hook, line & sinker

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Oh I think I've been had he's so for it!!!!!!!"

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By *icentious.LibertineWoman
over a year ago

Falkirk

*snigger*

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By *ootlover456Man
over a year ago

Paisley

One day, a man walks into a bar with an ostrich and a cat. The man orders a beer, and so does the ostrich. The cat orders half a pint, and refuses to tip the bartender. The bartender tells them their bill is $10.78. The man reaches into his pocket and gets exactly $10.78.

The next day, the man, the ostrich and the cat go back to the bar. They order the same thing as the day before, and again the cat is really rude to the bartender and won't tip him. The bartender tells them that their bill is $10.78. The man reaches into his pocket and gets exactly $10.78.

The next day, the man, the ostrich and the cat go back into the bar. This time the man and the ostrich order a double scotch. The cat orders a scotch and is rude to the bartender. The bartender smiles to himself, knowing that there is no chance the man will get the exact amount of money, and he's getting pissed at the cheapskate cat.

He tells the man that their bill is $15.63. The man reaches into his pocket and gets the exact change! The bartender is astonished. He asks the man how he always gets the right amount of change.

The man tells him, "Well, one day I came across a lamp. I rubbed it and a genie came out. He told me I could have any three wishes I wanted. My first wish was that I could reach into my pocket and get the exact change of anything I was buying."

"Very smart," said the bartender.

"My second wish was to have a high tolerance for alcohol."

"Good choice!" the bartender exclaimed. "What was your third wish?"

"Well, that wasn't too bright on my part. I wished for a chick with long legs and a tight pussy."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you call an illegitimate scottish insect?

A wee fly b@st##d

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