The Rebuttals:
-Your last name stays put.
-No one's forcing you to change yours.
-The garage is all yours.
-According to whom?
-Wedding plans take care of themselves.
-Who says you need 500 plus guests, extravagant flowers that match the bridesmaids dresses, bridesmaids, expensive band, seating arrangements and other expensive stuff.
-Chocolate is just another snack...
-Unisex.
-You can never be pregnant.
-Alright, I'll give you that.
-You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
-By all means, go right ahead.
-You can wear NO shirt to a water park.
-By all means, go right ahead.
-Car mechanics tell you the truth.
-Auto Repair and Maintenance for dummies, 14.99 for Kindle, 15.68 for paperback.
-The world is your urinal.
-Bushes are your friends.
-You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
-Selective.
-You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
-Fifty, fifty.
-Same work, more pay.
-Rich husband, no work.
-Wrinkles add character.
-Cougars.
-Wedding dress £5000. Tux rental-£100.
-Already covered.
-People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
-I'm 6'3''. People always stare at my chest when they're talking to me.
-New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
-Cause we buy them for comfort, not because they match the top we picked up yesterday.
-One mood all the time.
-Bullshit.
-Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
-Redact gossips and you can shave 10 seconds off of that.
-You know stuff about tanks.
-You know stuff about tank tops.
-A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
-Efficiency.
-You can open all your own jars.
-You can have people open them for you and save yourselves blisters.
-You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
-But three times the grievance for the slightest act of foolishness.
-If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
-Don't get mad, get even.
-Your underwear is £8.95 for a three-pack.
-Real men go commando.
-Three pairs of shoes are more than enough..
-Every day footwear, sports, special occasions. Again, efficiency.
-You almost never have strap problems in public.
-Shoulder it.
-You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes..
-Yes, we are. We're just better at ignoring them.
-Everything on your face stays its original colour.
-Clearly you've never been in a bar fight.
-The same hairstyle lasts for years, even decades.
-If the bike ain't broke...
-You only have to shave your face and neck.
-Not true.
-You can play with toys all your life.
-Phallic shaped and vibrating.
-One wallet and one pair of shoes -- one colour for all seasons.
-Black goes with everything.
-You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
-You can wear shorts if you didn't care what other people thought about your legs.
-You can 'do' your nails with a pocket knife.
-Yeeeah, I don't think so.
-You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
-If by freedom you mean consenting to endless bitching about how they scratch when we make out, sure we do.
-You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
-The reason it takes you longer is because it's called shopping. |
