FabSwingers.com forum: social organisation ! pls read

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Ok been thinking about things and what i feel is that we should stick to a small team that organise socials..........to many people are jumping on the bandwaggon of organising them..... if a small team do it then trust can be built up and less issues happen.

Obviously the recent problems siouxwan2 has had then also the dissasterous social buzz had backs up what i mean....the more people organising them the more problems there may be.

If they same people do it the tightter it can become, the trust is built up and strategies can be built up....

what do people think???

any other ideas???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thats a good idea as long as organisers remember to change cities so everyone gets a chance of going to one

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

think its a great idea jans tbh a wouldnt go to a social unless a reconized the name anyway as ur right to many being organized worth thinking abt so this doesnt happen again cant believe people would be so nasty anyway xxx angie and jim

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By *lay_N_cum2Couple
over a year ago

The Den KY5 0DS

tart2

We think its a good idea if you have people from both the East & West who are known and trusted site members, who are willing to take on the responsibilty of running the social's on a regular basis.

The teams could talk and disscuss where and when they are going to have a social so they don't clash. One way of reducing this occuring again is to have only verified couples and singles at the socials.

However there is no way you can stop people from organising their own social events..

We think what has happend to recent events as well as one we oganised previously is hurtful and spiteful as lot of time and effort goes into organising these social..and why should the nasty few spoil it all...for the fabby many..

George n Liz..xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"tart2

We think its a good idea if you have people from both the East & West who are known and trusted site members, who are willing to take on the responsibilty of running the social's on a regular basis.

However there is no way you can stop people from organising their own social events..

George n Liz..xx"

tottaly agree with u ....u cant stop people but i think people need to think before going to a social if that member has never done a social before.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think it can happen 2 anyone who holds

a social as it was someone that was

going 2 siouxwan social that gave out the

venue details.. easy done i think

tho hopefully it wont happen again

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By *cottishcoupleCouple
over a year ago

near irvine, ayrshire

thing with 2 ppl holding one in west one in east is the venue is someone goes to one then they know the venue if they then take hump wi person are we having to change venue all the time ??

a site that we used before socials were organised with a "nominated" person/couple and the people attending had to be site members for more than 6 months maybe a good idea as this site is free

most of the time all the people are genuine and want a good night out but hey there is always one (or 2) in every chat room want to waste it for all

ok my 2p

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok been thinking about things and what i feel is that we should stick to a small team that organise socials..........to many people are jumping on the bandwaggon of organising them..... if a small team do it then trust can be built up and less issues happen.

Obviously the recent problems siouxwan2 has had then also the dissasterous social buzz had backs up what i mean....the more people organising them the more problems there may be.

If they same people do it the tightter it can become, the trust is built up and strategies can be built up....

what do people think???

any other ideas???"

good point jo hun but as i have always done social nites out an drinks lunches since i started i thought that most in fab trusted an new me by now seems i was wrong ( DOES NOT INCLUDE MY FABBY FRIENDS I HAVE MADE JIST A FEW OF THOSE EEJITS ) i have kinda got to the bottom of this now an will not be mentioning names, but yes i feel that the trust has gone now an and others like play an jacs who arange socials for all to enjoy an raise money for i think the only way forward is to have only verified peeps an those who have been on site for longer than 3 /4 months .

or as my next event maybe we will only be asking those from now on i know i can trust so they will be emailed privately which seems so unfair as newbies neva get the chance to make friends or meet those they have been talking to in chat then .

its jist so sad that this person has no life and has to subject others to his her/ both whom eva it may be and take the opportunity of raising cash for others less fortunate than themselves .

as we all know loosing someone close is neva easy an spec with children as a few on site already know .

raising money has been a good way of helping our fabby friends help to cope with the loss or even the thot of loosing someone or to help rebuild a life once completely shatterd .

thoughtless none the less this person is few an far between an as i have stated they ...

WILL NEVA EVA TELL US WHERE EOR WHEN A VENUE CAN OR WILL BE HELD AS WE ALL DO SO MUCH GOOD FOR CHOSEN CHARITIES .

SO A BIG THANKYOU TO ALL THOSE WHO DO MAKE FAB A GOOD AN THOUGHTFUL PLACE AND GOOD NITES OUT AND SUPPORT OUR WORTHY CAUSES .

sioux xxxx

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By *eclan_and_AimeeCouple
over a year ago

dunblane, stirling

"One way of reducing this occuring again is to have only verified couples and singles at the socials.

George n Liz..xx"

One problem with this is that a lot of newbies use the socials as a way to meet people and become verified. Plus if anyone really wanted to go (to mess it up), it's not difficult to get verified.

As it's been said before if the newspapers were to turn up at a social, what would the story be?... a bunch of normal looking people attending a social party?

It could well have been a p'd off well established couple on the site?

I think sioux has the right idea for this one, maybe the revealing of the venue should be left as late as possible?

xAx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"thing with 2 ppl holding one in west one in east is the venue is someone goes to one then they know the venue if they then take hump wi person are we having to change venue all the time ??

a site that we used before socials were organised with a "nominated" person/couple and the people attending had to be site members for more than 6 months maybe a good idea as this site is free

most of the time all the people are genuine and want a good night out but hey there is always one (or 2) in every chat room want to waste it for all

ok my 2p "
totally agree with u sc have always tht that shd only be veri members at socials xxxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

good idea and i understand a bout the social that fucked up, but end of day if people want to go to one its up to them if the go and send money i understand organising one isnt easy...

maybe a suggestion would be if someone wants to a social then they buddy up with someone who has done one ??? and then monies and social venue is booked can be check by the buddy ??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"good idea and i understand a bout the social that fucked up, but end of day if people want to go to one its up to them if the go and send money i understand organising one isnt easy...

maybe a suggestion would be if someone wants to a social then they buddy up with someone who has done one ??? and then monies and social venue is booked can be check by the buddy ?? "

hence why 3 of us on this one fife hun

so much easier to keep track as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

jo i agree in principal with what u are saying as there does seem to be more and more socials organised now than ever before ..... almost monthly!!!

whilst i appreciate this is the chance to give more ppl the opportunity to attend it never seems to be the case and the same ppl are always top of the list regardless.

it would tend to put all the work on the same ppl all the time which is not entirely fair but if there would be members willing to help out (not just offer to help but ACTUALLY HELP) this may be the way forward.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can really see all the points that have been made but it does sadden me.

If i were new on here then until i had met someone and or been on the site a few months i could not attend a social.

Equally if it is the same people arranging them all the time..then it becomes a 'club' not the free moving social entity that it is supposed to be. There are also those who for many reasons ask not to be verified.

It would then..more than ever...be seen as a 'clique' activity.

Bluntly if it is by private invite only..or the same people and same invitees only..then you would be as well just mailing you mates and suggesting meeting at the pub or someones house.

I would respectfully suggest that if people want to have 'private' socials and heavily monitor the guest list..then these should never be mentioned in the forums and not spoken about at all..clearly then they cease to be what we now consider a social...

Part of the ethos of a social is to meet those you have not met before..new members and old. The chance to socialise and lay eyes on someone you had never met..or perhaps considered till this point.

There are loads of reasons for and against but I would be saddened if the socials became a 'clique' event with a limited invite list.

Until all who partake in this hobby can stand proud and say that they do..these issues will always exist and we just need to learn to deal with it the best we can. It is a knee jerk reaction to try and create sanctions and a plethora of rules simply because some small minded person tried to ruin a social gather of like minded people.

Only my opinion but part of the allure of swinging is the fact that is its open to anyone and there are always new and old faces appearing and reappearing and lets be honest..if we all just wanted to fuck the familiar face...we wouldnt swing now...would we

Vol

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

Obviously the recent problems siouxwan2 has had then also the dissasterous social buzz had backs up what i mean....the more people organising them the more problems there may be.

If they same people do it the tightter it can become, the trust is built up and strategies can be built up....

what do people think???

any other ideas???"

that is not a bad idea... as long as people are going to spread them over different cities......

I was looking as possibly trying to organise one for edinburgh.. but have just seen people basically organising socials now so close together than I think my window for trying to get as many people going as possible has gone....

as long as they are set out for different places and spaced out so that it give people the time to get sorted between events then I would be up for this.... as if we are going to do this, can i also suggest 2 other things....

1) rather than block booking spaces... may people who want to go actually put there names downs.... I think it is unfair for one person/couple to ask for 6-8 tickets.....

2) open up the getting of tickets closer to the event... one site i am on doesn't open them up till 10 weeks before the event...... so of us on floating shifts mean we don't know what shifts we are on 6 months beforehand and at the speed these things fill up then newer people don't have the chance to go because its already filled....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

1) rather than block booking spaces... may people who want to go actually put there names downs.... I think it is unfair for one person/couple to ask for 6-8 tickets.....

good points well made

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i agree with voluptous for newbies its hard and to turn it into a clique activity would happen! i chose this social because so many established members were attending so knew it would be the real deal but also that other new people would be attending. its a shame what has happened and i hope truely whatever turd did this develops rampagin herpes for the hassle they have caused to people and to hit a very good cause because of their own sad twisted mind. the only way round it that i can think of is havin peoples personal email and phone numbers to confirm who they are if they are willing to attend a social then they should be willing to give some personal details out as people will see them there anyway!! xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with all of the above, we can maybe use this thread to throw ideas into the pot on how best to organise a social with regards to security and payment etc.

Sioux, like the other regular social organisers have done a fantastic job in this and previous events. Jo and I helped to organise one last year so know how hard it is.

I believe the venue details are normally only released a week before the event. It could be suggested that this changes to a few hours before the event and be sent via sms message. Disadvantage of this is if something goes wrong, no time to organise another venue.

A lot of the established members suggest to newbies to attend socials to get themselves known so it would be a shame if we exclude then.... BUT if it means that things like this don't happen again then maybe its a sacrifice we have to make. Maybe the site has to get involved a little and those organising socials through the forums HAVE to get approval from admin? Thinking back to the Edin social last year there!

Any more thoughts on how to make them even better?

Steve

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

how about paypal for payment?? it only takes ten mins to set up?

someone else mentioned a different password for everyone??

or just location bein released but not actual venue until say hr before??

just a few ideas xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/02/10 10:19:55]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i dont think the venue being released till an hr before hand is a good idea... if someone wants to sabotage an event they will whether its an hr before or 3 days before ...at least the more time ppl have if something were to go wrong gives them time to perhaps find another venue etc xx

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

thanks... just been having some more thoughts.... just from when i organised big site socials on other sites..

I think the key one for the future is the giving out of the actually address detials as close to the event time as possible.... 5-7 days is what I always went with.. and only those who confirmed got the details...

I would love to set up some sort of social calander... and get the site to call it something else other than a "social"(not going to say the "m" word for now... but it may be heading that way) lets just say for now every 6 weeks and put them in different parts of scotland, that way they feel special and people can make genuine weekends of the events, but like someone said before, I don't think you are going to be able to stop people organising there own little socials...

being on the outside and Having been to my first scotish social...I think you do have something special going on... the key is not to milk it dry

but I think we have hit saturation point a bit here..... not having a dig at anyones socials... but 2 in the area within 4 weeks of each other does smack of people not talking to each other, plus it stop other people from organising others.... for example... I wouldn't want to be the one to split the site by organising another on the same night elsewhere.....

I hope it does get sorted..... I want to see all of scotland and meet as many people as possible... but if they are too close together.. then financially as much as anything, people are not going to be able to do it........ and people are going to end up burning themselves out.....

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

I know we don't go to the socials so shouldn't really have a view.......but can I ask a question?

The venue backed off because they found out you were a swinging social........wouldn't it be easier to try and find places to hire that you can tell the truth that it is a swingers get together?

Or do most places back off if you mention swinging?

Great post by the way Voluptuos

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Absolutley spot on vol wot a crackin post.

Rugby the venue was informed that it was an adult party and at most may be some playful highjinks that may take place. They we happy to oblige providing that it was minumal and that no damage had been done, even to the point that they themselves thought it would be a hilarious night to have. The venue owners backed off and cancelled because the complainer for want of a better word had stated that drugs would be in abundance leading to sordid sex sessions on the dancefloor. They also warned that they had already contacted the Police to advise them of the drugs to be used, as well as contacting a national newspaper to attend if it was not cancelled. Because of the nature of the intended venue,they could not take the chance of being raided by Police, with the owners apologising for the cancelation stating that they were pretty sure that the complaint was indeed malicous. Even if the Police raid did not find any problems, it would tarnish the enjoyement of all attending and leave the venue with a less than rosy reputation.

Again thanks for the support.

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"I know we don't go to the socials so shouldn't really have a view.......but can I ask a question?

The venue backed off because they found out you were a swinging social........wouldn't it be easier to try and find places to hire that you can tell the truth that it is a swingers get together?

Or do most places back off if you mention swinging?

Great post by the way Voluptuos "

having organised a few I can answer some of your questions....

what I have told venues is that the people I am organising it for is of an "adult" nature (thats my kop out way of saying it.

)... but actually the behaviour is no worst than most city centre pubs on a saturday night so in that respect they have no worries.. in fact most venues after they have seen one are keen to have us back... i still get phone calls.. lol

for most places I think it is a perception of what is going to happen (i.e a massive orgy is going to break out) that makes then back away.... whereas the reality is that, and don't tell the public this, is swingers can actually behave themselves... sssh don't tell everybody!!!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

lol _abio

Exactly what I meant though, as they are socials and not mass orgies then if people booked them and told them the same as you did, then there would be no need for any cloak and dagger stuff, as if someone was nasty enough to mail the venue, it wouldn't make any difference as the venue already knew.

I am guessing some venues might back away from the thought of swingers though, cos we are all deviants who can't keep our clothes on, even in public

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By *ountrypairCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

good post vol hun

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By *empnbunkCouple
over a year ago

south coast

couldnt agree more vol babe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I also agree with Vols post....

But the main thing that saddens me more,is the fact that these socials have incorporated fund raising for various charities and some folk wanna corrupt them.

What the feck is that all about ?

There is nothing more hurtful,than losing someone so close to your heart and if funds are a small token in helping others, it shows you care.

Good luck with the continued socials.

Buboo xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"thanks... just been having some more thoughts.... just from when i organised big site socials on other sites..

being on the outside and Having been to my first scotish social...I think you do have something special going on... the key is not to milk it dry

good points there _abio but ....... i neva give out details till week before an i only gave those who had paid the veuue details so where did we go wrong?

mail will now only be sent out on the day an to peoples hotmail account or yahoo which ever they do use or those who;s numbers i do have will be txt the venue .

i am not new to doing socials an have arranged a good few with no probs what so eva untill now lol but it could have been anyones this person wished to sabbotage jist luck of the draw ours was first out on the dates .

but yip i can say if any one has any better ideas on how to arrange them then im all for it .

as in all ways my first priority is to those coming an i explain that by asking them not to give venue details out to any one . or let it slip where evenue is but alsa some slip thru ..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Totally agree with vol.

Also, if a newbie/non verified member wants to run a social I don't really see how you can stop them doing it apart from boycotting their event, which would then smack of cliqueism (is that a word? lol).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have been giving thought on how best to reduce the risk of exposure or any sort of sabotage.

It has to be remembered that you cannot guarantee this, but you can do you damn best.

one of my thoughts..

a date and area is suggested.. ie..glasgow on sat 20th july...

people then have to post individually on the thread to say if they want a ticket. They also have to message the host/hostess on the site giving thier mobile number. The host then calls the interested party...speaks to the person (persons if a couple) to confirm interest and establish they are genuine.

One this has been established..the people are told they have a ticket reserved for them. This ticket is then paid for either..1) via paypal or 2) in person. Then the ticket is sent 1)to the persons home address 2)or it can be collected in person 3) or is collected by someone else that is a trusted and or known person.

Now yes..this will give away your real name and address and not all are keen, you do have the option of in person..so at the very least you are meeting someone face to face which tend to deter most who would want to cause hassles (too mcuh palaver etc ususally)

This does then mean that anyone can get a ticket and stops the need for only established members of the site being able to attend. It also means that only established members of the site are likely to want to arrange a social anyways.

There will now be a list of confirmed people who have tickets and want to go and no more..'6 tickets for me' as everyone has to do the same thing.

2 weeks before a text is sent to all those who require hotels..giving a slightly closer idea of venue..but still nothing in detail.

On the day itsself..the addy of the venue is given out 3 hours before via text only.

yes this is a palaver..yes its slightly more costly and yes it does mean there is a more face to face issue. However if you are going to attend a social..then you will see people face to face anyways..so annonimity is not possible anyways!!

It is not an ideal situation..but there are restraints that surround our lifestyle choice so its either..go the extra mile...or stay with the current format and hope this never happens again....because no system is foolproof..there will always be those who want to cause upset..its a fact of life

vol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i think maybe we just need to hand out venue details a little later, when booking tickets if u want more then 2 tickets then u have to say id like 4 tickets for bob tom dick and harry please,,, etc ????

and ALL of us being a bit more careful of who we talk to about where etc ...

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By *empnbunkCouple
over a year ago

south coast

agree wi lass on that 1 if yer gettin tickets for someone else you really have to name who they are not just ask for 4 or 6 tickets either that or yer limited to tickets for yourself only

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was generally finding myself saying, "jeezo is every tom dick n harry inventing a social" is/was gettin chaotic,appreciate the fact some great forward plannings going into this because as i say it was getting daft, My 2p worth.

T xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

wasnt aware of the problems that sioux has had with her social .

For all the good ideas floating about you can never account for the actions of one twisted pathetic sadcase arsehole .

Personally i hope the persons in question have been ip banned from the site and some measures are taking into stricter access .

And i agree with Vol , there is already a feeling of 'the clique' on here , closed shop socials would only confirm it

My tuppence worth

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By *cottishcoupleCouple
over a year ago

near irvine, ayrshire

have read all the points and i now understand why the last site i used had so many rules lol think either they have done there homework or they have had this crap happen to them !!

at the end of the day if someone wants to waste it all be it revealing the venue or trying to scam others they will do it !! rules or no rules thats how these ppl work

think leaving to last min to reveal the venue isnt always gonna work people need to book hotels and plan in advance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think it's terrible what has happened. I can totally see the problem that venues might have.

However I think if the site were to intervene on who is allowed to hold socials it would be a very dull turn out for the rest of us. I have held a couple of ladies nights when I had never been to a social. They worked out fine! No one got upset and no one turned up who shouldn't.

I do think it would be terribly sad if only verified members get to go, as others said before it becomes very cliquey.

At the end of the day it's a shame someone got so upset that they felt the only way they could vent their frustration was by ruining a perfectly innocent night of fun! Well relatively innocent anyway.... xx

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By *Y MAN n MECouple
over a year ago

FIFE

"I can really see all the points that have been made but it does sadden me.

If i were new on here then until i had met someone and or been on the site a few months i could not attend a social.

It would then..more than ever...be seen as a 'clique' activity.

Bluntly if it is by private invite only..or the same people and same invitees only..then you would be as well just mailing you mates and suggesting meeting at the pub or someones house.

Part of the ethos of a social is to meet those you have not met before..new members and old. The chance to socialise and lay eyes on someone you had never met..or perhaps considered till this point.

There are loads of reasons for and against but I would be saddened if the socials became a 'clique' event with a limited invite list.

Vol

xx"

HERE HERE! could not have put it better ourselves. very valid points about same organisers making it into a their friends only type social, no disrespect to them but to a degree this happens now, yes when a social is mentioned in forums the names are fast and furiously posted in a rush to get places, please don't exclude newbies to the site, they are nervous enough at meeting so socials are ideal to break the ice. As for the east/west area socials, from the 2 Fife socials we've attewnded there have been loads of folk from west side country.... it;s each to their own some folks will travel miles for a good party, so don't let the few idiots spoil events of the other genuine members of Fab.

XX Heather & Allan

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t attend socials, but after reading this thread and others it’s quite sad what’s happened.

However why do you have to give out the venue details to anyone? Why not all meet up at a local pub/public place near the venue at an arranged time, then just move onto the venue.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Don’t attend socials, but after reading this thread and others it’s quite sad what’s happened.

However why do you have to give out the venue details to anyone? Why not all meet up at a local pub/public place near the venue at an arranged time, then just move onto the venue.

perhaps not that practical when ur talking 150+ ppl!!!

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By *dinburgh_duoCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

Obviously the recent problems siouxwan2 has had then also the dissasterous social buzz had backs up what i mean....the more people organising them the more problems there may be.

If they same people do it the tightter it can become, the trust is built up and strategies can be built up....

what do people think???

any other ideas???"

Jo you are absolutely spot on.... Difficulty (IMO) lie's with who is going to be the 'deciding authority' on who can have them and who can't..... There are people on here who have done them for ages and others who want part of the action too, I can't keep up with them all! I guess the many different socials offer choice and something different???

To be honest there are a number of socials advertised on here that I wouldn't consider stepping foot in but thats my business and my choice. I've heard so many disaster social stories including the socials you mention, as well as a certain social that charged different people different prices not to mention threats about certain tabloids being involved..... If I'm honest there has become such a sense of rivalry between some people organising some socials that I've found it quite off putting and opted not to go. Hearing about what has happened at Sioux's social has put us off ever stepping foot in another....

So a big "up yours" to the seemingly sad looser who attempted to ruin Sioux's social, clearly they aren't into the real essence of this lifestyle at all and are more intent on wrecking what will probably be a bloody good night!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Obviously the recent problems siouxwan2 has had then also the dissasterous social buzz had backs up what i mean....the more people organising them the more problems there may be.

If they same people do it the tightter it can become, the trust is built up and strategies can be built up....

what do people think???

any other ideas???

I didn't see my social as wanting to grab 'part of the action' or as a rival force to others who organise socials, it was simply my wish to have a big happy birthday party with all my friends in one place. But don't worry I get the message.... I shan't bother organising another.

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By *dinburgh_duoCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

Obviously the recent problems siouxwan2 has had then also the dissasterous social buzz had backs up what i mean....the more people organising them the more problems there may be.

If they same people do it the tightter it can become, the trust is built up and strategies can be built up....

what do people think???

any other ideas???

Oh my god Laine I wasn't meaning you!!!!!! Sorry if it seemed that way

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

okay.... a few things than could be raised with the help of admin...

1) is there any way we can have some sort of "social calander" sticky... that way potential organisers and people who want to go can:

a) see what is out there on certain dates

b) stop the social overload and get them spaced out better...

c) finally get people from the same areas to organise socials together that then same area socials organised by different people weeks apart.....

I think there is consensus that newbies shouldn't be discouraged from going and vol made some great points...

I was just working on something just to see if it would work with regard to spreading the socials around a bit....

if for example to say every 5 weeks... so we have 10 "fab sponsored scottish socials" a year..... and stick them in different locations..... my scottish geography is crap so just something i scribbled

social 1:Perth

social 2:Glasgow

social 3:Aberdeen

social 4:Edinburgh

social 5:Ayr

social 6:Dundee

social 7:Glasgow

social 8:Inverness

social 9:Edinburgh

social 10:Dumfries

feel free to pick apart as you wish... only reason edinburgh and glasgow got two each is that they have the biggest centres of population....

that would give people from all over scotland a chance to go..... it would locals a chance to be meet the regulars... and people to make big weekends of the events....

obviously the plan would only work if people in those areas decided to co operate but something like this may bring the buzz back....

feel free to rip!!!!

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By *dinburgh_duoCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

"okay.... a few things than could be raised with the help of admin...

1) is there any way we can have some sort of "social calander" sticky... that way potential organisers and people who want to go can:

a) see what is out there on certain dates

b) stop the social overload and get them spaced out better...

c) finally get people from the same areas to organise socials together that then same area socials organised by different people weeks apart.....

I think there is consensus that newbies shouldn't be discouraged from going and vol made some great points...

I was just working on something just to see if it would work with regard to spreading the socials around a bit....

social 1:Perth

social 2:Glasgow

social 3:Aberdeen

social 4:Edinburgh

social 5:Ayr

social 6:Dundee

social 7:Glasgow

social 8:Inverness

social 9:Edinburgh

social 10:Dumfries

feel free to pick apart as you wish... only reason edinburgh and glasgow got two each is that they have the biggest centres of population....

that would give people from all over scotland a chance to go..... it would locals a chance to be meet the regulars... and people to make big weekends of the events....

obviously the plan would only work if people in those areas decided to co operate but something like this may bring the buzz back....

feel free to rip!!!!

socials are organised by individual fab members and are not sponsored by the site in anyway nor do they take any responsibility for what may or may not occur at them.......

Good idea though!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bit too clinical, part of the fun is spontanious chances to both meet and opt to do a social, train timetable style of socials turns this scene into "a fixture list"

T xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

the best way is verified/ 6 plus mths on site if non verified folk let them do there own as most folk on here that do socials no each other

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes and they got to know each other through TRUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

which is kind of hard to develop if they dont get the chance??

one sad sick twisted individual shouldnt ruin it for the genuine people and if people dont show their verifications what next?? xx

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By *1cebren4uWoman
over a year ago

clydebank

"the best way is verified/ 6 plus mths on site if non verified folk let them do there own as most folk on here that do socials no each other

May i say that wasnt you going to this social and you say 6 mths when you have only been on this site for three weeks a little hypocritical i think . mmmmmmmmmm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yea hun thats wat they are(sick)xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

how can you be friends with yourself on your profile???? strange??

for many GENUINE newbies the socials are a chance to get verified and prove they can be TRUSTED.

im still sickened someone could do that utterly sickened!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes and they got to know each other through TRUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

which is kind of hard to develop if they dont get the chance??

one sad sick twisted individual shouldnt ruin it for the genuine people and if people dont show their verifications what next?? xx"
verifications should be shown shouldnt be allowed to hide them

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By *1cebren4uWoman
over a year ago

clydebank

"how can you be friends with yourself on your profile???? strange??

for many GENUINE newbies the socials are a chance to get verified and prove they can be TRUSTED.

im still sickened someone could do that utterly sickened!!

xx"

yea i want to know that too how ya can be ,mates wie ya self xxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

u dont show yours either???

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"how can you be friends with yourself on your profile???? strange??

for many GENUINE newbies the socials are a chance to get verified and prove they can be TRUSTED.

im still sickened someone could do that utterly sickened!!

yea i want to know that too how ya can be ,mates wie ya self xxxxxxxxx"

i love me i should be able to friends with me!!! but cant add myself as friend hmmmmmmmmmm????????x

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By *1cebren4uWoman
over a year ago

clydebank

"how can you be friends with yourself on your profile???? strange??

for many GENUINE newbies the socials are a chance to get verified and prove they can be TRUSTED.

im still sickened someone could do that utterly sickened!!

yea i want to know that too how ya can be ,mates wie ya self xxxxxxxxx

i love me i should be able to friends with me!!! but cant add myself as friend hmmmmmmmmmm????????x"

ill love you hun wanna be friends xxxxxxxxxxxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/02/10 23:04:15]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yeah and then u can verify me cause im just so cool!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes and they got to know each other through TRUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

which is kind of hard to develop if they dont get the chance??

one sad sick twisted individual shouldnt ruin it for the genuine people and if people dont show their verifications what next?? xxverifications should be shown shouldnt be allowed to hide them"

thats just crazy talk!!

verifications are a choice..choice to get them...choice to show them.

I know that i dont show all of mine as i dont like to see a big list of verifications..others dont like to show any at all.

However..in my opinion its outrageous to exclude people from socials on the grounds of verifications or longevity on the site.

If thats hows its going..then its 'clique central' and destroys the very ethos of swinging.

vol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes and they got to know each other through TRUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

which is kind of hard to develop if they dont get the chance??

one sad sick twisted individual shouldnt ruin it for the genuine people and if people dont show their verifications what next?? xxverifications should be shown shouldnt be allowed to hide them

thats just crazy talk!!

verifications are a choice..choice to get them...choice to show them.

I know that i dont show all of mine as i dont like to see a big list of verifications..others dont like to show any at all.

However..in my opinion its outrageous to exclude people from socials on the grounds of verifications or longevity on the site.

If thats hows its going..then its 'clique central' and destroys the very ethos of swinging.

vol

xx"

totally agree vol!! i dont show mine as its no ones business, but know that i could ask any of my previous meets to vouch for me if i needed them too xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a was friends with myself but had a fall out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"yes and they got to know each other through TRUST!!!!!!!!!!!!!

which is kind of hard to develop if they dont get the chance??

one sad sick twisted individual shouldnt ruin it for the genuine people and if people dont show their verifications what next?? xxverifications should be shown shouldnt be allowed to hide them

thats just crazy talk!!

verifications are a choice..choice to get them...choice to show them.

I know that i dont show all of mine as i dont like to see a big list of verifications..others dont like to show any at all.

However..in my opinion its outrageous to exclude people from socials on the grounds of verifications or longevity on the site.

If thats hows its going..then its 'clique central' and destroys the very ethos of swinging.

vol

xx"

Call me naive, but when organising my birthday party I stated first come first serve for the places, irrespective of whether they were close friends, acquaintances, new 'faces' old 'faces' couples or singles.

I did not ask for verifications longevity of membership or any other factors... I extended my TRUST to those wishing to come, I HOPE they repay me with theirs.

Everyone is equal here in my eyes no matter how long (or not) they have been with FAB. Everyone starts off as newbies and when I was one trust was shown to me.

As in all things what goes around comes around. Good or bad. xxx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

def laine we were all new at some point and if you dont have trust you have nothin!!

there always some sad twisted fucker who wants to ruin somethin good!!

but karma has a fantastic way of bitin people on the ass when they least expect it!! xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Whoever it was will be loving the attention it is bringing him/her/them, so if a line is drawn under it, they get no more attention.

Even better would be a good time had by all on the social and lots of money raised for the chosen charity.

That will be good enough revenge, knowing they couldn't stop it happening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Whoever it was will be loving the attention it is bringing him/her/them, so if a line is drawn under it, they get no more attention.

Even better would be a good time had by all on the social and lots of money raised for the chosen charity.

wel said ruby xx

That will be good enough revenge, knowing they couldn't stop it happening

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

kinda jordanesque innit even bein most hated person on the forums its attention!! sad really!!

if u feel like comin up for a party rugby u can have ma sofa lol!!!

im sure the nite will be even more of a success because of this with people determined to enjoy it more!! xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

"Whoever it was will be loving the attention it is bringing him/her/them, so if a line is drawn under it, they get no more attention.

Even better would be a good time had by all on the social and lots of money raised for the chosen charity.

wel said ruby xx

That will be good enough revenge, knowing they couldn't stop it happening

Is my post a rolling eye post?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

a dont think am hated the forums are here for everyone to have there opions

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

no one said you were?? it was the person who tried to fuck up the social we meant or are you that person?? surely not!!!!!!!!!!

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

lol I thought you meant me then being the most hated person....and I was going to say it might be my whip that does it lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"no one said you were?? it was the person who tried to fuck up the social we meant or are you that person?? surely not!!!!!!!!!! "

am very sorry you did put it under my post and no i am not that person i like to have a laugh in forums i aint that sick as for you info i did lose a child a few yrs back

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

ok people, keep it clean and ignore anyone who pees you off......

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By *1cebren4uWoman
over a year ago

clydebank

"lol I thought you meant me then being the most hated person....and I was going to say it might be my whip that does it lol

NO HUN WE LOVE YOU XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Am feeling the luuuuurve now!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"no one said you were?? it was the person who tried to fuck up the social we meant or are you that person?? surely not!!!!!!!!!!

am very sorry you did put it under my post and no i am not that person i like to have a laugh in forums i aint that sick as for you info i did lose a child a few yrs back "

im really sorry for your loss and my heart goes out to you for that to happen is somethin i could never cope with but i never mentioned anythin like that??

once again sorry for your loss xx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

lol @ bren

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"no one said you were?? it was the person who tried to fuck up the social we meant or are you that person?? surely not!!!!!!!!!!

am very sorry you did put it under my post and no i am not that person i like to have a laugh in forums i aint that sick as for you info i did lose a child a few yrs back ok sorry just thought you were getting at me not to worry we shall leave it there hun xxx

im really sorry for your loss and my heart goes out to you for that to happen is somethin i could never cope with but i never mentioned anythin like that??

once again sorry for your loss xx"

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By *1cebren4uWoman
over a year ago

clydebank

"lol @ bren"

im coming down in a wk hope to meet ya hun xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx ill mail ya xxxxxxxxxx

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ok xx

And I have to be honest, we fancy a social up in Scotland one time, but your sofa is safe nwzty, we snore !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ok xx

And I have to be honest, we fancy a social up in Scotland one time, but your sofa is safe nwzty, we snore !!

Get yerselves up here for my birthday then lol !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ping this back up,see if gets more ideas/thoughts.

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By *9fun69Couple
over a year ago

coatbridge

we think that jands are right in what they say it should be a great idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

yes i agree but all people going should all realise that the social will go ahead and not expect to know the venue until the day of the event. Sue did great post local hotels so book in log on that morning all will be reveal. Sue did great to organise another venue at short notice a great night. i know i wanted to know the venue address early on but glad i waited x

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

can I come back to something I have seen that worries me just a little....

that is so many socials in one little area of scotland in a short amount of time....

great for people living in that area... not so great for people having to deal with finding hotel accomodation and travel costs ....

3 socials for example in fife over the space of 6 weeks, and I find myself dealing with "should I go to A, B or C"..... I would love to go to all of them... but it isn't cheap!!!

now if I was in a different part of scotland (well basically live there as it is!!!) and I was organising.... first of all I wouldn't want to step over other people in regards to dates.... so thats those counted out

Plus then you have to find a window where there is space to hold one... not too close to other peoples so that as many people as possible go....

I was looking at organising a social for edinburgh, but at the moment it is becoming increasing more difficult to do so because I don't want to crowd others socials.....

I would love to travel all over scotland, and out of respect for the organisers of the Inverness and perth socials I don't want to play anything to close to theres... so people have time to recover and working out when people can then try to organise theres...

so all I would as is for some better co-ordination between event organisers... if we did have some kind of social calander up on the site... then at least people would have a better chance of spacing them all out

because it the moment and think we are in danger of having so many socials that they become stale with the same people going to the same events....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swinging is a lovely exciting,spontanious,schedule-less thing,which is part of the excitement, likewise with socials, love idea of only X amount responsible for organising them,pick the socials you fancy going to with the same freedom you choose who and when to swing with,just a thought.

T xx

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By *abioMan
over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

"Swinging is a lovely exciting,spontanious,schedule-less thing,which is part of the excitement, likewise with socials, love idea of only X amount responsible for organising them,pick the socials you fancy going to with the same freedom you choose who and when to swing with,just a thought.

T xx"

spontanious and schedule-less... great if you don't have kids, or work, or a million other things called "real life" thats gets in the way..... for the rest of us mere mortals these things do take some planning...

said by someone slap bang in the middle of the 3 socials..... lol

so you have one on feb 19th... then one on march 7... then one march 20th.... all just a few miles from each other....

3 over the stretch on 5 weekends... great if you live nearby!!!

I would love to get to as many scottish socials is humanly possible.... to support as many good events as possible, but when it gets to the stage of asking people who don't live by, to get 3 hotels rooms, or to travel 3 times then it gets to the point where people have to pick and choose not because they want to... but because they have to!

I wish I could afford to go to all 3..... but I can't, and I am sure that others will have to make choices likewise......

So all I we suggesting is that organisors "could" have some consideration and space them out better, hence some sort of social calandar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They are planned enough, you get a heads up weeks/months in advance of their happening,that for most is enough info surely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

would be cool if there was like a calender for areas then i suppose people could plan if they in that area and so forth!!

i admire the people who plan these things there is a lot of work goes into them and with what happened durin the wk with the nutcase attemptin to sabotage the ayrshire one it shows that you need to be very careful!!

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