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why are folks scared to give honest opinions ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

baffles me a bit on here tbh

I come on the forum for a bit of a laugh , bit of debate and sheer bloody noseyness !! So i throw up daft questions in a bid to spur on some of the above

But very very folks give an honest opinion and it seems the diplomatic non offensive exclude no one answers are roundly applauded

Seems odd that so many adults have no opinions on so many topics , i have my opinions rightly or wrongly and i will stand by them , i may disagree with others opinions but would defend your right to have them and air them but nobody seems willing to do so ?????

So why the diplomacy ? Is it fear of restricting your chances ? I can only assume it is .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

just cause we have opinions that differ from you doesnt mean we are frightened.

it kicks off many times in the forums/chat rooms because people clash over different opinions....

viva la debate.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"baffles me a bit on here tbh

I come on the forum for a bit of a laugh , bit of debate and sheer bloody noseyness !! So i throw up daft questions in a bid to spur on some of the above

But very very folks give an honest opinion and it seems the diplomatic non offensive exclude no one answers are roundly applauded

Seems odd that so many adults have no opinions on so many topics , i have my opinions rightly or wrongly and i will stand by them , i may disagree with others opinions but would defend your right to have them and air them but nobody seems willing to do so ?????

So why the diplomacy ? Is it fear of restricting your chances ? I can only assume it is . "

Hmmmmmmmmm how do u know ppl answers r not an honest opinion ? i always reply to post how see fit to so not sure what ur getting at here with this post ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

reason its nameing an shaming (i belive)

an it be very up popular

so i would say keep your opinions to yourself about others as it would be unfair on the party in question

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"just cause we have opinions that differ from you doesnt mean we are frightened.

it kicks off many times in the forums/chat rooms because people clash over different opinions....

viva la debate.

"

Did you read the bit where i said that welcome opposing opinions and enjoy debate ?

As for clashes over someone having a differing opinion i find that laughable to be honest as i said i may disgree with anothers opinion but i would argue all day over their right to hold it

I hope that you dont think this is a dig at you personally as it truly aint and apologise if you feel it is , but on the skinny v curvy thread your response is exactly what i am referring to , sticking down 'both' strikes me as an easy get out without upsetting anyone and i find it hard to believe that anyone doesnt have an ideal or slight preference from one or the other. if you genuinley have no preference then fair enough but i expect the vast majority to answer in a similar manner which in turn leads me to believe that many ( not all) are playing the diplomatic card to avoid eleminating their chances

Strikes me as odd that is all

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

[Removed by poster at 22/01/10 13:28:07]

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"just cause we have opinions that differ from you doesnt mean we are frightened.

it kicks off many times in the forums/chat rooms because people clash over different opinions....

viva la debate.

Did you read the bit where i said that welcome opposing opinions and enjoy debate ?

As for clashes over someone having a differing opinion i find that laughable to be honest as i said i may disgree with anothers opinion but i would argue all day over their right to hold it

I hope that you dont think this is a dig at you personally as it truly aint and apologise if you feel it is , but on the skinny v curvy thread your response is exactly what i am referring to , sticking down 'both' strikes me as an easy get out without upsetting anyone and i find it hard to believe that anyone doesnt have an ideal or slight preference from one or the other. if you genuinley have no preference then fair enough but i expect the vast majority to answer in a similar manner which in turn leads me to believe that many ( not all) are playing the diplomatic card to avoid eleminating their chances

Strikes me as odd that is all "

hmmmmmm u ask for ppls opinions and u got them

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"baffles me a bit on here tbh

I come on the forum for a bit of a laugh , bit of debate and sheer bloody noseyness !! So i throw up daft questions in a bid to spur on some of the above

But very very folks give an honest opinion and it seems the diplomatic non offensive exclude no one answers are roundly applauded

Seems odd that so many adults have no opinions on so many topics , i have my opinions rightly or wrongly and i will stand by them , i may disagree with others opinions but would defend your right to have them and air them but nobody seems willing to do so ?????

So why the diplomacy ? Is it fear of restricting your chances ? I can only assume it is .

Hmmmmmmmmm how do u know ppl answers r not an honest opinion ? i always reply to post how see fit to so not sure what ur getting at here with this post ? "

I dont , but when you look at profiles and folks are very clear and concise about what they do or dont like then in a bit of daft harmless fun on the forum they are presented a choice of A or B the majority go against their profile prefrence and diplomatically say 'both'

As above it just strikes me as odd

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"chances". ermm "chances" of getting to meet a slim or curvy person? I really dont discriminate, i dunno, maybe if you want a rrrrrrockin debate pick another starter for ten? ,lol.

Cyclists versus car drivers, there,thats gotta work,lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

'very diplomatic yet somehow predictable lol

I expect most will say the same in fear of putting off any possible contacts'

I had only posted an answer... an honest answer, Jac agreed and then you post this thread. You hardly gave people as chance to answer..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

iv "debated" with you a few times over items in the forums and find it very amusing!!

i say what i feel and if i offend someone then sorry but its tough!!

if i feel i dont havin anythin to put into to thread il leave it but would never resort to the insults and name callin that sometimes happens except when severely provoked!!! xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"'very diplomatic yet somehow predictable lol

I expect most will say the same in fear of putting off any possible contacts'

I had only posted an answer... an honest answer, Jac agreed and then you post this thread. You hardly gave people as chance to answer..

"

As i said mate it aint a personal dig it you and i apologise if you feel it is or was

Just a wee thing i noticed so posed the question

T - cyclists , a royal pain in the chuff are the not aware that red lights apply to all traffic !!!

Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I could be wrong, I have been wrong in the past and no doubt will be wrong again in the future!!

As its an opinion post I'll post mine.

Rugby,Honey,SJ,Mark if you dont want this thread to go in this particular direction please delete MY post rather than closing the whole thread as I dont want to ruin it for anyone else ,

I think some folks will be hesitant over posting their own opinions on certain subjects because the way they have seen previous threads, I think its totally right to have/post opinions on subjects, but when those subjects become personalised by certain replies the whole thread tends to degenerate into a name calling exercise and is rapidly closed or deleted.

The post the OP is referring to in this post I assume is the "skinny Vs curvy" thread.

Now in the past folks have posted their opinions,when describing the "preference" this has rapidly gone from skinny to skinny bitch, to stick insect etc. and the other side has gone from Curvy to fattie, to backside of a bus etc.

The people who get upset or overly involved and take "perceived offence" when certain descriptions are given tend to either subconciously or conciously use inflammatory wording when they reply, this gives admin no choice but to close or delete threads.

I know admin attempt to allow threads to develop into something but sometimes prevent a thread early because they have seen a "trend" towards an argumentative style and a possible quality debate/discussion can be closed before it really covers some of the valuable points the majority would like to have covered.

I know the mods/admin already have a really really tough job, many of us appreciate the work they do, but I wonder if possibly a football type warning system might work, possibly giving a thread or individual reply a "yellow card" a warning so that it doesnt ruin the thread completely, it lets posters know the thread is coming close to crossing the line, then if a continued offence takes place then a "red card" can be given, thread closed/deleted.

No idea whether this might work, but might it be worth a try ?

We are after all ADULTS by definition just by being here, I know some feel they have to be protected from abuse,naming shaming , etc but those type of rule breaking can like football be given a "straight red card" EG, no warning just close the thread,delete the post and in extreme cases ban the poster.

Thoughts anyone ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"iv "debated" with you a few times over items in the forums and find it very amusing!!

i say what i feel and if i offend someone then sorry but its tough!!

if i feel i dont havin anythin to put into to thread il leave it but would never resort to the insults and name callin that sometimes happens except when severely provoked!!! xx "

Indeed we have no fall outs , no name calling or insults just a bit of debate on opposing views

And at the end of it all i still 'would'

P.s still no had that smooch ye promised

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/01/10 13:45:12]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

it's cool dude. I actually agree with you.

if I did have a preference I would say.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"iv "debated" with you a few times over items in the forums and find it very amusing!!

i say what i feel and if i offend someone then sorry but its tough!!

if i feel i dont havin anythin to put into to thread il leave it but would never resort to the insults and name callin that sometimes happens except when severely provoked!!! xx

Indeed we have no fall outs , no name calling or insults just a bit of debate on opposing views

And at the end of it all i still 'would'

P.s still no had that smooch ye promised "

debatin without turnin bitchy is a great skill but as noms said sometimes people do take things as a personal thing iv done it myself!!

ps i dont type it i say it here lol!!!!!

smooch?? woah ya big romantic lol!! xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I could be wrong, I have been wrong in the past and no doubt will be wrong again in the future!!

As its an opinion post I'll post mine.

Rugby,Honey,SJ,Mark if you dont want this thread to go in this particular direction please delete MY post rather than closing the whole thread as I dont want to ruin it for anyone else ,

I think some folks will be hesitant over posting their own opinions on certain subjects because the way they have seen previous threads, I think its totally right to have/post opinions on subjects, but when those subjects become personalised by certain replies the whole thread tends to degenerate into a name calling exercise and is rapidly closed or deleted.

The post the OP is referring to in this post I assume is the "skinny Vs curvy" thread.

Now in the past folks have posted their opinions,when describing the "preference" this has rapidly gone from skinny to skinny bitch, to stick insect etc. and the other side has gone from Curvy to fattie, to backside of a bus etc.

The people who get upset or overly involved and take "perceived offence" when certain descriptions are given tend to either subconciously or conciously use inflammatory wording when they reply, this gives admin no choice but to close or delete threads.

I know admin attempt to allow threads to develop into something but sometimes prevent a thread early because they have seen a "trend" towards an argumentative style and a possible quality debate/discussion can be closed before it really covers some of the valuable points the majority would like to have covered.

I know the mods/admin already have a really really tough job, many of us appreciate the work they do, but I wonder if possibly a football type warning system might work, possibly giving a thread or individual reply a "yellow card" a warning so that it doesnt ruin the thread completely, it lets posters know the thread is coming close to crossing the line, then if a continued offence takes place then a "red card" can be given, thread closed/deleted.

No idea whether this might work, but might it be worth a try ?

We are after all ADULTS by definition just by being here, I know some feel they have to be protected from abuse,naming shaming , etc but those type of rule breaking can like football be given a "straight red card" EG, no warning just close the thread,delete the post and in extreme cases ban the poster.

Thoughts anyone ? "

A fine post , thank you

Being a relative newbie to the site i have not witnessed threads or posts descend into what you have mentioned above , but you may well have hit the nail square in the nut

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

maybe my brain is not in gear today but i cant properly understand what this is all about.

curvy vs skinny

what wrong with loving both or having a preference

personally i cant be bothered participating in many of these threads, i ignore it and move on yes that was tongue n cheek

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"I could be wrong, I have been wrong in the past and no doubt will be wrong again in the future!!

As its an opinion post I'll post mine.

Rugby,Honey,SJ,Mark if you dont want this thread to go in this particular direction please delete MY post rather than closing the whole thread as I dont want to ruin it for anyone else ,

I think some folks will be hesitant over posting their own opinions on certain subjects because the way they have seen previous threads, I think its totally right to have/post opinions on subjects, but when those subjects become personalised by certain replies the whole thread tends to degenerate into a name calling exercise and is rapidly closed or deleted.

The post the OP is referring to in this post I assume is the "skinny Vs curvy" thread.

Now in the past folks have posted their opinions,when describing the "preference" this has rapidly gone from skinny to skinny bitch, to stick insect etc. and the other side has gone from Curvy to fattie, to backside of a bus etc.

The people who get upset or overly involved and take "perceived offence" when certain descriptions are given tend to either subconciously or conciously use inflammatory wording when they reply, this gives admin no choice but to close or delete threads.

I know admin attempt to allow threads to develop into something but sometimes prevent a thread early because they have seen a "trend" towards an argumentative style and a possible quality debate/discussion can be closed before it really covers some of the valuable points the majority would like to have covered.

I know the mods/admin already have a really really tough job, many of us appreciate the work they do, but I wonder if possibly a football type warning system might work, possibly giving a thread or individual reply a "yellow card" a warning so that it doesnt ruin the thread completely, it lets posters know the thread is coming close to crossing the line, then if a continued offence takes place then a "red card" can be given, thread closed/deleted.

No idea whether this might work, but might it be worth a try ?

We are after all ADULTS by definition just by being here, I know some feel they have to be protected from abuse,naming shaming , etc but those type of rule breaking can like football be given a "straight red card" EG, no warning just close the thread,delete the post and in extreme cases ban the poster.

Thoughts anyone ? "

A great post by you plums xx

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By (user no longer on site)
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Nice one Plums

I know I have and I expect Rugby has mailed little warnings to people in the past or even posted warnings on threads to try and prevent them degenerating into free for alls

Sometimes it works and sometimes it does'nt as people will read posts,stop and comment before they have read the whole thread so don't always see us asking people to play nice

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh

The thing to bear in mind people is this;

Opinions are like assholes, everybodies got one, and half the time they're full of shit.

Nothing to see here. Move along please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 22/01/10 15:30:16]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I know nothing about any post or what this is all about so here's my 2p on opinions ...............

There's also the small few who can hold their water and keep their opinions to themselves and just go with the flow.

There is no right or wrong way of expressing your opinion. When others disagree though it has to be respected as their opinion and remember that is only an opinion and not fact.

Phew....a lot of "opinion" there lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thing to bear in mind people is this;

Opinions are like assholes, everybodies got one, and half the time they're full of shit.

Nothing to see here. Move along please."
exactly my point would be the same

dunno why we have to go on about this

let it be put to bed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The thing to bear in mind people is this;

Opinions are like assholes, everybodies got one, and half the time they're full of shit.

Nothing to see here. Move along please. exactly my point would be the same

dunno why we have to go on about this

let it be put to bed"

We agree also. The skinny vs curvy thread does not add any value to the forums in our opinion; it only serves to make the minority resultants feel less wanted, which is bad for their self esteem and a loss for the community.

This topic just appears to tug at a thread most people were too wise to pull at, recognising that little to no good can come of expressing strong opinions.

It's not inconsistency in their opinions, it's merely a display of discretion and tempering their wording accordingly.

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By *ountrypairCouple
over a year ago

edinburgh

ok ok ok if u want my honest opinion i think its a volatile thread (fat v skinny) to put up and i think that all its going to do is provoke argument within the community i dont see it as a relivent subject at all !! n thats ma onest 2 bobs worth lol

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By *rouble and strifeCouple
over a year ago

Nr Glasgow


"The thing to bear in mind people is this;

Opinions are like assholes, everybodies got one, and half the time they're full of shit.

Nothing to see here. Move along please."
so your opinion is full of shit.self confessed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

my opinion .....

who really cares what other peoples preferences are, surely it should be your own that concerns u

AND

if people spent less time trying to cause a rift in the fold fab would be a happier place

jst my opinion though

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By *imfromGlasgowMan
over a year ago

er...guess


"

We agree also. The skinny vs curvy thread does not add any value to the forums in our opinion........"

If we're only going to permit threads which 'add value' to the forums it's going to get really, really quiet around here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

We agree also. The skinny vs curvy thread does not add any value to the forums in our opinion........

If we're only going to permit threads which 'add value' to the forums it's going to get really, really quiet around here. "

i second that

imho there is some amount of dross posted

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By *ensualfire88Man
over a year ago

Edinburgh


"The thing to bear in mind people is this;

Opinions are like assholes, everybodies got one, and half the time they're full of shit.

Nothing to see here. Move along please.so your opinion is full of shit.self confessed"

Not if you were intelligent enough to read and comprehend what i wrote.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

ok my last post on the matter .

Just to clarify

At no point was the skinng v curvy thread intended to cause any rift , alienate anyone or be antagonistic in anyway shape or form ( see what i did there ?)

It was simply intended as a bit of harmless fun and a chance at a bit of a giggle , how it can be construed as an attempt to disrupt the fab community is beyond me

As for adding 'value' to the forum ??? Well i dont know where to begin tbh , on any forum i am a member of its viewed as a place to ask questions , gain info, debate any number of subjects or just generally shot the shit and have a laugh, seems i have called this place wrong .

I have not falling out with , name called or insulted anyone , if anyone has taken any sort of offence at any of my posts then i apologise .

For the time being i will shut my yap , keep my opinions to myself and leave the forum for the valued posts .

The internet - its a serious business!!!!

Peace out .

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

p.s if the admin wish to remove this or any other thread i have posted , then please feel free to do so

Ta

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

to be fair u could ask kitty cat or whiskas in the forums and it would probably decend it chaos!! at the end of the day we all responsible for our answers the same as we are all free to choose whether to post or not as are we entitled to have our opinion respected whether people agree or not!!! xx

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By *imfromGlasgowMan
over a year ago

er...guess


"p.s if the admin wish to remove this or any other thread i have posted , then please feel free to do so

Ta "

If admin wished to remove this, or any other thread, they wouldn't await permission.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"p.s if the admin wish to remove this or any other thread i have posted , then please feel free to do so

Ta

If admin wished to remove this, or any other thread, they wouldn't await permission."

No but if the origonal poster has asked for it to be removed they they can remove it

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By *imfromGlasgowMan
over a year ago

er...guess


"p.s if the admin wish to remove this or any other thread i have posted , then please feel free to do so

Ta

If admin wished to remove this, or any other thread, they wouldn't await permission.

No but if the origonal poster has asked for it to be removed they they can remove it "

They can remove it whether the OP has asked for it to be removed or not.

Has the OP asked to have it removed?

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