FabSwingers.com forum: Timewasters

By *ohn831 OP Man
5 weeks ago

Glasgow

Hi everyone. Generally speaking. The fab community is such a great community filled with amazing people. But how do we go about dealing with time wasters? People who arrange meets and then don’t show, ghost and then block you?

I’m a firm believer that no one is under any obligation to meet with or interact with anyone in any way if they chose not to… and I totally understand that you might have a change of heart or have found a better option - but common decency goes a long way.

How do we go about policing our own community?

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By *ympho6969Woman
5 weeks ago

glasgow

Unfortunately there isn't a negative veri option here.

Sometimes I wish there was. I'm all for people changing their mind, I've done it myself but I have the balls to tell them well ahead of the meet.

I can't stand those who don't bother and make you look like a fool or cancel on you as you arrive.

I just try to move on and hope I find that regular fwb that I click with

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By *eroLondonMan
5 weeks ago

Mayfair

Is this a general question, OP or have you personally and repeatedly experienced so called timewasters and ghosters?

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By *uzanne and RickyCouple
5 weeks ago

Midlothian

The main reason we stopped meeting. It was endless. Went through a spell where every guy we’d arranged to meet cancelled, even social meets. Pity.

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By *ouMeandThemCouple
4 weeks ago

Leek

Aaah timewasters - yup - our last ooh half a dozen meets, we’ve been ghosted. As some have already said, life happens and there’s nothing we can do about it but we are all adults here and a polite thanks but no thanks, I’ve had second thoughts or don’t want to meet you goes a long way, instead of nothing. We’ve practically given up now. We’ve been with FAB around 6 years and it’s just got progressively worse- it’s a real shame

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By *oupleInSyncCouple
4 weeks ago

Falkirk

It's something we have struggled with. Especially this past while. Lost count of the amount of people we have opened up a WhatsApp group chat with, after them being "keen", for the conversation to completely dry up and they disappear. Three times we have gotten as far as giving an address to come and meet and if all was well to have some fun, then they've disappeared.

It puzzles us slightly that so many people post, complaining about lack of meets etc, yet some when it's literally right there in front of them, they ghost us. What a crazy world we live in.

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By *luemoonxMan
4 weeks ago

Edinburgh

A problem as old as time on Fab and any other site where people arrange nsa hookups.

You learn to spot the signs over time but Fab has definitely got worse for fakes etc. and even the verification system doesn’t offer any guarantee.

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By *oupleInSyncCouple
4 weeks ago

Falkirk

"A problem as old as time on Fab and any other site where people arrange nsa hookups.

You learn to spot the signs over time but Fab has definitely got worse for fakes etc. and even the verification system doesn’t offer any guarantee."

I'd agree on the verification not being an absolute guarantee. We had an issue recently where a male site user sent a nice opening message, started to chat, but then refused to share a face pic because our profile is as yet unverified. Which I understand in their part, but it does make a bit of a catch 22 situation. The reason we are as yet unverified is that we've fallen at the last hurdle so many times in regard to meeting.

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By *inkycherryWoman
4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

I only meet at clubs now due to the amount of timewasters i used to get least a club of they dont turn up im not left alone

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By *ugbyBawsMan
4 weeks ago

Fife

I struggle to get anyone to give me their time, let alone waste mine. Haha

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By *eard and LegsCouple
4 weeks ago

Central belt

[Removed by poster at 03/07/26 10:07:16]

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By *eard and LegsCouple
4 weeks ago

Central belt

"A problem as old as time on Fab and any other site where people arrange nsa hookups.

You learn to spot the signs over time but Fab has definitely got worse for fakes etc. and even the verification system doesn’t offer any guarantee.

Would you guys consider going to a club?

Or just meet another couple for a social?

We have our two verifications that way. Might help you get yours?

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By *eard and LegsCouple
4 weeks ago

Central belt

"I struggle to get anyone to give me their time, let alone waste mine. Haha"

Definitely harder for you guys on here!!

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By *eard and LegsCouple
4 weeks ago

Central belt

"I only meet at clubs now due to the amount of timewasters i used to get least a club of they dont turn up im not left alone

Probably make you feel safer too? And you don’t have to clean the sheets after 😜😂

I had considered coming on here as a single female but was too worried about how safe it is.

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By *cothereMan
4 weeks ago

ayrshire

I would never think of not turning up for arrangements. To me that's just ignorant easy enough to send message re changed mind or something come up

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By *cothereMan
4 weeks ago

ayrshire

But as folk agree it is difficult for guys like me anyways

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By *inkycherryWoman
4 weeks ago

Ayrshire

"I only meet at clubs now due to the amount of timewasters i used to get least a club of they dont turn up im not left alone

Probably make you feel safer too? And you don’t have to clean the sheets after 😜😂

I had considered coming on here as a single female but was too worried about how safe it is. "

Safety is up to you really on how much you tell people ect i dont give out my number or anything dont even add as a friend til iv met them at a club or an arranged social get together ect

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By *lassyGent95Man
4 weeks ago

horsham

I booked and paid for a hotel, was on my way to the hotel and went to message the person to find they’d blocked me. Kinda just went about my day, tried arranging something else, but, as all single guys realise, it’s not easy on here so ended up using the hotel for a takeaway and a break away. Ended up okay, could have been better though!

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By *loise5TV/TS
4 weeks ago

Glasgow

I've had quite a few timewasters over my many years on here, so now I only meet at clubs, either CJs or AfterDark. That way, if they go, I know they are serious. Many have not shown for those meets either, but if that happens, it's no prob, because there are plenty of girls to chat to...

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By *irsttimefunclCouple
4 weeks ago

The North

Genuinely think there is a lot of people who love the idea of it and it’s a thrill. Then when the crunch time comes round it’s a back out with no explanation lol not saying that’s for all people but can guarantee a few get off on the idea rather than the action x

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By *ohn831 OP Man
4 weeks ago

Glasgow

I find it really interesting how far down the line people go before they have a change of heart or whatever you want to call it. And in all honesty… I’m ok with changing your mind. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.. I just think it’s really immature and childish when you get to the point of having something set up … a time and place and then they just block on all channels. Quite funny really. And that’s fine if that’s your kink… but then it should be flagged so others aren’t wasting their own time… or money if you’re travelling or booking a hotel etc

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By *cotsguy4funMan
4 weeks ago

north Lanarkshire

I didn't think I was naive bit genuinely surprised amount of women and couples tgat experience this. Genuinely thought it was just guys.

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By *oykoiWoman
4 weeks ago

Glasgow

I think it always has and always will be an unsolvable problem. If you allow negative verifications then you open up “spite” ones and so I think your only defence is to be rather ruthless in your vetting. I’ve found this pretty infallible and always worth it.

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By *malltownboy2Man
4 weeks ago

in the middle of nowhere

I think it all sound exciting to them and as they chat and think about it and have a wank at the same time, they cum and it's all over, until the next time they chat and same thing happens, think there is a difference between people who really want to meet and people who are just after a cheap wank. I think that's why everybody is more cautious now about meeting, very frustrating part of fab! But that's life it takes all sorts.

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By *exy gentMan
3 weeks ago

Midlothian

I have never stood anybody up, and if I couldn't make it for any reason, a message was always sent explaining and apologies

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By *otEdinburghmaleMan
3 weeks ago

Blackpool

I feel for all those who have been let down or ghosted. There should really be a site facility where the perps can have their profile removed by the site owners.

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

I haven’t ghosted, but when you’re just an ordinary man, chances of anyone chatting in the first place is about zilch.

I have chatted and decided before meeting was even mentioned that this isn’t for me.

Really can’t figure out why this is so common.

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By *ollyRoxxxWoman
3 weeks ago

Wishaw

This is why I try to have socials in a coffee place or a spoons. I keep a book and headphones handy.

The few times I've been ghosted/stood up I've been able to take some me time.

A solo date if you will.

Pain in the arse tho even if my partner and I had a lovely lunch after being stood up by a couple!!

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By *aybe one dayMan
3 weeks ago

annan

Like every other man has said its hard enough to get a meet but theres plenty of people in life who prevaricate about everything and do nothing out of fear. Acting on impulse and following through takes a degree of guts or blind stupidity in my case

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By *ottagetsomeMan
3 weeks ago

Livingston

"I only meet at clubs now due to the amount of timewasters i used to get least a club of they dont turn up im not left alone

Don't get why anyone would stand you up x

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

I don’t get standing anyone up at all.

Even if the person turns out to be not what you’d expected I’d still have a coffee and a crac.

Being sociable and friendly doesn’t hurt

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By *eetootsWoman
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

"I booked and paid for a hotel, was on my way to the hotel and went to message the person to find they’d blocked me. Kinda just went about my day, tried arranging something else, but, as all single guys realise, it’s not easy on here so ended up using the hotel for a takeaway and a break away. Ended up okay, could have been better though! "

Similar has happened to me, i was able to call the hotel and reschedule then took my friend a few months later for a wee girlie spa overnight so it wasnt wasted

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By (user no longer on site)
3 weeks ago

That’s a really trash way to be treated, but it does bring about a learning curve.

I’d only ever meet for a coffee or a walk first.

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By *gain2025Couple
3 weeks ago

kilsyth

Hey

We meet! Absolutely we meet.

Coupes and single ladies

By all means message please

Meeting is what we are here to do

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By *athy77Woman
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

"The main reason we stopped meeting. It was endless. Went through a spell where every guy we’d arranged to meet cancelled, even social meets. Pity. "

Its very frustrating. I mainly meet through my couples profile and so many seem to want to chat when they are horny, suggest meeting then ghost closer to the time

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By *athy77Woman
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

"It's something we have struggled with. Especially this past while. Lost count of the amount of people we have opened up a WhatsApp group chat with, after them being "keen", for the conversation to completely dry up and they disappear. Three times we have gotten as far as giving an address to come and meet and if all was well to have some fun, then they've disappeared.

It puzzles us slightly that so many people post, complaining about lack of meets etc, yet some when it's literally right there in front of them, they ghost us. What a crazy world we live in. "

I meet mostly with my fwb and we have had similar issues. So many relatives dying, sudden illness etc on the day of an arranged meet

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By *athy77Woman
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

"I only meet at clubs now due to the amount of timewasters i used to get least a club of they dont turn up im not left alone

Probably make you feel safer too? And you don’t have to clean the sheets after 😜😂

I had considered coming on here as a single female but was too worried about how safe it is. "

I started off as a single female then met fwb and mainly meet as a couple now.

On my own I have a trusted friend who always knew where I was but I've not had any bad experiences.

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By *alkolmBMan
3 weeks ago

Burghead

I had someone stand me up, ghost me and then three weeks later send me a wink…

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By *ncomplicated GuyMan
3 weeks ago

bathagte

Had this happen a few times and as a genuine guy it’s so frustrating if I can meet we meet but if nothing happens I will always let you know and reschedule as life sometimes happens, just be up front

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By *enelope2UWoman
3 weeks ago

Doesn't matter cant block distances

It's impossible because some get off on the thought others actually require real and the rest are sadly in between.

There's ZERO community or joint agreement on this site.

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By *enelope2UWoman
3 weeks ago

Doesn't matter cant block distances

"I feel for all those who have been let down or ghosted. There should really be a site facility where the perps can have their profile removed by the site owners. "

This site cares only about numbers and payments not actual safety or ways of improving it.

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By *arried bi100Man
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

"Hi everyone. Generally speaking. The fab community is such a great community filled with amazing people. But how do we go about dealing with time wasters? People who arrange meets and then don’t show, ghost and then block you?

You really just need to rely on common courtesy I think

How do we go about policing our own community? "

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By *andi69erMan
2 weeks ago

Carluke

It's surprising how many ghoster's there are on here. Been sent to the wrong house which was very embarrassing, sat in garden center's and cafe's for hours.

There's some lassie's on here who seem to take enjoyment out of it. They usually block me or disappear.

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By *rMrsQuietlyWildCouple
2 weeks ago

Glasgow

We've definitely had our share of people ghosting and no shows!

One in particular who we made time for a social due to previous let downs, all went great he practically begged for another meet even messaged on the day to say he was looking forward to it, then didn't show! We had arranged to meet at cjs due to previous let downs. When we went to check our phones incase he messaged to say something had come up, we realised we'd been blocked 🙄!

It definitely gave my confidence a little knock for a bit but decided it was a him problem not us and have luckily had some great meets since.

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