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Alternative highway code.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

When approaching traffic lights..if they are at green, slow down even more. once at red you can stop and text yer pal.

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By *cottishsexgoddessWoman
over a year ago

Glenrothes

Strangely enough, when lights are at green you are not supposed to race up to them, you are meant to slow down a bit, in case they change! lol. Obviously, texting at any time is a no no

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Roundabouts: look right, if lots of traffic coming from your right, another chance to send a quick text.

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

If you drive a 'Chelsea Tractor' on the school run, just chuck the kids in the back and don't worry, those yellow zig zags outside the school are just for you to park on at any time

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By *he Enigmatic MagnetMan
over a year ago

Glasgow West

Local councils can install speed, traffic light and bus lane cameras to make you top up the council tax they can't be arsed to collect.

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

There is only 1 rule in the highway code

GET OUT MY WAY....YOU SHOULDNT BE ON MY ROAD IN THE FIRST PLACE !!!!!!!!

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By *he Enigmatic MagnetMan
over a year ago

Glasgow West


"There is only 1 rule in the highway code

GET OUT MY WAY....YOU SHOULDNT BE ON MY ROAD IN THE FIRST PLACE !!!!!!!! "

So you're a taxi driver, then?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dont turn left. Turn right

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By *akedninjaMan
over a year ago

edinburgh

Lol what are rules for if not to be broken

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

NO need to use your indicators, the good folks behind or approaching you don't need to know where you're heading.....

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By *ndykayMan
over a year ago

Falkirk

The pavement is an extension of the road for HGVs!!

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By *cottishsexgoddessWoman
over a year ago

Glenrothes

Massive puddles next to the pavement MUST be driven through and soak unsuspecting pedestrians from head to foot

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"NO need to use your indicators, the good folks behind or approaching you don't need to know where you're heading....."
Does my heed in, that.

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By *icked weaselCouple
over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

sunroofs were invented so people could actually stand up inside cars...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"sunroofs were invented so people could actually stand up inside cars... "
gives them more legroom when out dogging or having car fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Give way (but only if you think 2 metres gap isn't enough to pull out)

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814


"There is only 1 rule in the highway code

GET OUT MY WAY....YOU SHOULDNT BE ON MY ROAD IN THE FIRST PLACE !!!!!!!! "

Bloody taxi drivers

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east


"There is only 1 rule in the highway code

GET OUT MY WAY....YOU SHOULDNT BE ON MY ROAD IN THE FIRST PLACE !!!!!!!!

Bloody taxi drivers "

Whaaaaaaat ? we own the roads... they're ours rite

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"There is only 1 rule in the highway code

GET OUT MY WAY....YOU SHOULDNT BE ON MY ROAD IN THE FIRST PLACE !!!!!!!!

Bloody taxi drivers

Whaaaaaaat ? we own the roads... they're ours rite "

Yip, if you want to get along maryhill road quickly, follow a taxi,,lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Immature and insecure in your sexuality? Wind down the window and shout abuse at a cyclist as you speed past within 2 inches.

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By *eeflower69Woman
over a year ago

edinburgh

If the speed limit on the road is 40 please only drive at 30 and when it changes to 60 you may than speed up to 40 except when I go to over take you, then of course you must speed up to 65 but slow back down to 40 when I can no longer over take due to on coming traffic.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Stobarts Law - as you approach the end of a section of dual carriageway, there will always be an HGV just too far ahead to pass.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The middle or right hand lane are specifically for women who want to sit & do their make up whilst looking in their rear view mirror whilst not keeping up with the speed that other motorists are doing in that lane. Women do not drive on the left as there may be a pavement or other obstacle on their Nearside (N/S) which they will inevitably hit.

Women should only drive a Chelsea Tractor, purchased for them by some dumb husband who isn't getting any or that she can cheat on, so that she can drop off the brats at the school & then call her bit on the side on her mobile whilst double parked on the zig zag lines outside the school.

Women are allowed to text & make mobile phone calls whist driving by law - as we all know the Highway Code does not apply to women. This is the law. However this law is not written down - it appeared somewhere in an old copy of Cosmopolitan or Bella.

Women are allowed to park ANYWHERE. This is the law.

Reverse is not a gear on the car. This is an optional extra on all vehicles & should only be used sparingly, particularly if you can drive into a parking space suitable for two vehicles & make that a space suitable for one car or a Chelsea Tractor. This law only applies to women & under no circumstances should men try to use this. Reverse & considerate parking is reserved strictly for men.

Indicators are for hanging your handbag on. Under no circumstances should women use them. The driver behind you already knows you have no idea where you're going.

If you're vehicle is larger than the other road users then as a female driver you have right of way at any junction or roundabout, irrespective of oncoming vehicles.

As a woman driver it is your right to tick off other road users. This is the law.

Double white lines between carriages do not mean no overtaking/stay in lane - all drivers behind you know that as a woman you can only drive on the right so you can change lane at any time when that left hand turn is coming up. Do not use your indicators as this is where your handbag is & you may spill the contents of your bag on the floor of the vehicle & the driver behind wouldn't want that.

As a woman if you are stopped by police for any reason then FLIRT & use your god given womanly ways to get off any possible fine. Men are fucked & they know this. This is the law.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh I just KNOW what's coming. This is called Mans Intuition. Another thing men rely on when stuck behind women drivers.

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By *he Enigmatic MagnetMan
over a year ago

Glasgow West

The two best posts ever on here!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Oh I just KNOW what's coming. This is called Mans Intuition. Another thing men rely on when stuck behind women drivers.

"

Mans intuition also comes into play regularly during sex & other areas of life because as we all know it is a woman's right to change her mind - frequently. Men are born to be mind readers as we all know. This is not the law. This is just a fact. Deal with it guys.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The two best posts ever on here! "

Stop exaggerating - you meant today.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

And has "Mirror, signal, manouver" changed fur 2013 ? Its, "Signal. manouver, mirror" now then?,,,, must be, gotta be,,,lol

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Nope .....its manoeuvre ...GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!!! ....YOU SHOULDNT BE ON MY ROAD!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You must roll backwards towards the car behind you at every give way junction while trying to start your engine, rather than put on the fecking handbrake first!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Had that scenario,, poor womans auld fiesta was stuck in 2nd gear, each time it stalled,,,rolled closer,,,n closer, then bump.

I was actually nice about it(hard to believe i know),lol,i tried to get it into neutral etc for her, while all the other drivers just leant on their horns,,awsome i thought, big helps.

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