FabSwingers.com forum: Why do SOME men…

By *ore_Please81 OP Woman
3 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Why do some men take a polite rejection so badly and turn to abuse?

Don’t get me wrong some men are very respectful and I am too when rejected as I know I’m not for everyone.

But recently, like today I’ve been call all sort been told I would kill myself… for just say no thanks not for me.

Do they really think that will change my mind? My block button is on fire today 🤯🤯🤯

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By *ustaman85Man
3 weeks ago

here and there

i honestly don’t get this, not everyone fancies every one, so just say humble, and move on, not need to resort to insults etc because someone doesn’t fancy someone else

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By *asmine_23Woman
3 weeks ago

Ayrshire

People like that should honestly just reconsider the swinging scene, honestly. Swinging does not equal guaranteed sex. It means chatting, building connections, sometimes even just social events, but at the bare minimum just being a fucking decent person. Not everyone finds everyone attractive and that’s absolutely okay! If their ego is so bruised, perhaps they need to do some inner work before they consider swinging a bit more ethically. Drives me up the wall! I’m sorry you have been subjected to this abuse, it’s not on.

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By *idmy87Man
3 weeks ago

Lenzie

[Removed by poster at 12/05/25 20:43:47]

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By *idmy87Man
3 weeks ago

Lenzie

[Removed by poster at 12/05/25 20:44:24]

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By *igYinDoonThereMan
3 weeks ago

Dunfermline

I've had my fair share of women taking the time to reply and say no thanks. I'm not offended as I know I'm not everyone's cup of tea.

Certainly wouldn't go back with an abusive message. Just sad that women feel the need to block I'm assuming because they think they'd get an abusive message back. Not my style. I'm a big boy and can handle a woman saying no.

Absolutely no need for being a keyboard warrior. Have the balls to be man enough to accept a woman's decision.

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By *idmy87Man
3 weeks ago

Lenzie

There should be a vetting process on here, and some sort of ban for abusing other people. I don’t know what the solution is but the horrible people on here have to ed out.

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By *idmy87Man
3 weeks ago

Lenzie

*moved out (won’t let me change it for some reason)

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By *ore_Please81 OP Woman
3 weeks ago

Edinburgh

"People like that should honestly just reconsider the swinging scene, honestly. Swinging does not equal guaranteed sex. It means chatting, building connections, sometimes even just social events, but at the bare minimum just being a fucking decent person. Not everyone finds everyone attractive and that’s absolutely okay! If their ego is so bruised, perhaps they need to do some inner work before they consider swinging a bit more ethically. Drives me up the wall! I’m sorry you have been subjected to this abuse, it’s not on."

Thank you just blocked, reported and moved on.

But it seems to be getting more frequent x

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By *reedyKWoman
3 weeks ago

Fife

I've also had a day of abuse and name calling. It really feels like it's getting worse on here. They feel brave and entitled behind a screen.

Hopefully you don't take it too heart. Xx

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By *yrdsisWoman
3 weeks ago

Gleam Street

Me! Some folks are just see you next Tuesdays

It happens

The block button is a wonderful tool.

If only I had a quid for every best that's chucked their toy out the pram... least I know who to avoid

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By *aylorMan
3 weeks ago

Fife

The block button has it's use's.

I usually thank the sender for taking the time when they politely inform me that I'm not for them.

Too many people nowadays feel entitled

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By *innMan
3 weeks ago

edinburgh

Historically it’s been a problem. I don’t know if reporting the abuse has any consequences. I think it’s fair for women to put the abusers profile name in their status and let others know.

One things first sure - if you receive abuse from a profile it certainly means you were right to say no in the first place.

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By *eaAndBiscuits8788Couple
3 weeks ago

moray

We've had our fair share of these people. we don't mean to be offensive but as soon as you say sorry we're not interested, looking at the moment or take time to reply they just start.

They are just trolls

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By *ellinever70Woman
3 weeks ago

Ayrshire

" I think it’s fair for women to put the abusers profile name in their status and let others know.

You may think this, but it's not allowed

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By *urd no1Woman
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

" I think it’s fair for women to put the abusers profile name in their status and let others know.

You may think this, but it's not allowed

I ALWAYS name and shame the abusers, never once have been told that I can’t

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By *assion8Man
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

I know I'm not everyone's cuppa tea, and I always show respect if I get a polite rejection or a read/delete.

However, some folk can be just plain rude with their rejection messages, one that comes to mind is "wouldn't touch you with a barge pole", there is absolutely no need for it, just read and delete rather than spurt abuse. Needless to say the block button was used there

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By *hogun300Man
3 weeks ago

Dundee

They think can say what like and have no repercussions. They are showing themselves up and to be very imature. They don't understand the site and see it as instashag and can't work out what they are doing wrong. Also word can get around via chat groups, word of mouth etc who to avoid. Its just pathetic really.

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By *lirty_fit2Couple
3 weeks ago

Northumberland

We've had couples do this too, it's bang out of order, sorry you've been subjected to it. The lifestyle is about choice, freedom and attraction is a major part of the lifestyle if it's not there then people should accept it and move on.

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By *Carver-Man
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

It's pathetic, isn't it? My best guess is that they regret having been vulnerable enough to express desire and so immediately need to rewrite history for themselves so that it somehow never happened.

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By *lder budweiserMan
3 weeks ago

Stirlingshire

"Why do some men take a polite rejection so badly and turn to abuse?

Don’t get me wrong some men are very respectful and I am too when rejected as I know I’m not for everyone.

But recently, like today I’ve been call all sort been told I would kill myself… for just say no thanks not for me.

Do they really think that will change my mind? My block button is on fire today 🤯🤯🤯"

A mistaken sense of entitlement?

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By *erfHerder74Man
3 weeks ago

Inverclyde

It’s sad when they act like that, definitely a good escape from what could be a violent person.

The issue with a lot of fab members is that because they masturbate to porn, and take a picture of their dick that they think they are gods gift and attractive to everyone.

The worst ones are those who take a huff and they haven’t shared a face picture.

Definitely unstable

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By *corpioboyMan
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

I agree with a lot of the comments on this post. I can’t understand why some people feel the need to resort to a torrent of abuse aimed at women and couples if they’ve been turned down. Totally no need for it. Just be nice and accept that we’re not all for everyone. Get used to rejection, accept it and move on.

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By *wissT2024Man
3 weeks ago

Glasgow

It's just sad wee boys taking the nip coz they think they're something special when in most cases they're painfully ordinary.

They can't handle rejection coz they have the emotional maturity of a housebrick and yes I've had absuse for rejecting guys even though my profile says im straight, go figure

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By *exy gentMan
3 weeks ago

Midlothian

Bit of a bug bear of mine, never can understand the abuse given out, fucking keyboard warriors that still live with their parents

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By *nce flew over a ....Man
3 weeks ago

falkirk

I've have taken the approach of blocking females if they ignore me or if i don't like them.

Saves coming across as a undesirable or chasing just anything.

There's just very few females left on updates now 🤣😂🤣

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By *oco_BanjoMan
3 weeks ago

Paisley

Got surprising abuse from a rather hot couples profile once. Blocked and reported. Nothing happened with that though the profile is still active.

I hate how it gives the rest of us a bad name. A frustration of mine is that sent messages get left unread, I understand why - I try my best not to resend a message, at least until a week later. But I don’t give out any abuse whatsoever. I’d like to think most guys on here are respectful but it sounds like most are not, unfortunately. I guess a lot of women will read the preview of a message and consider whether or not to read/reply based on a presumption that they’re gonna get abuse.

Surely something can be done about abusers… a better reporting mechanism perhaps where you can upload a screenshot of the abuse itself?

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By *ainyDaySunshineMan
3 weeks ago

Ayrshire

A reply either way is nice. The majority just read and delete.

Go with no news is good news

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By *ifemarkMan
3 weeks ago

dalgety bay

Ratio of men, their frustrations in thinking they are entitled to an answer, the expectation that this is a quick fuck and go resource, there are many reasons why this abuse happens and it will continue to happen until there are consequences, hiding behind a screen gives people the bravery they otherwise would never have, and that applies to all online media.

It’s just a sad fact of current life and until there is a seismic shift in community sense, social acceptance, accountability and responsibility then we will remain in this social purgatory.

I ever hope for a reply, I accept that the numbers suggest otherwise, I therefore browse, enjoy and put the phone down again…

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By *assy LassieWoman
3 weeks ago

Lanarkshire

"Bit of a bug bear of mine, never can understand the abuse given out, fucking keyboard warriors that still live with their parents "

I've had more abuse from older men late 50s and above than younger guys. Reckon they know time is limited and desperation is setting in

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By *irthybrownMan
3 weeks ago

near you

When I get a rejection I politely say thanks and happy gabbing. No need to waste time being abusive. If someone doesn’t fancy chatting or meeting then move on and hope to find someone interested.

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By *neyewillyMan
3 weeks ago

Falkirk

I don't get a lot of mail in the first place. They tend to go for younger guys. Yet am good for my age am told. I can take a straight forward no. But some get nasty. That says more about them than me. Personally it your that nasty your not my kind of person anyway. I treat everyone with respect after all it costs nothing to be nice and civil to each other.

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By *aketaxibelfastMan
3 weeks ago

Belfast

Emotional manipulation. Personally tell them to fcuk right off and post their profile name on your status

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