FabSwingers.com forum: Banned substances

By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

So I need to start a banned substance list...

I hate marmite and Nutella!!!!

Anything else you want to add to the list????

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Peanut butter

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hangovers. Can I ban hangovers? Please.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I second hangovers they the work of the devil

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Offal, esp. liver and kidneys

Haggis

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Salad cream Christ search what it's made off yuk!!

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

Peanut butter is definitely on the list!!

Hangovers?? Meh, self inflicted I'm afraid lol

Salad cream? I can take it or leave it so not sure it should be a banned substance lol

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Offal, esp. liver and kidneys

Haggis"

Offal is soooooo on the banned substance list!!!

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"I second hangovers they the work of the devil

No, apparently they are the work of 3!!!! Bottles of champagne

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By *habsMan
over a year ago

Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex

Black pudding!

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Black pudding!"

Yep, give ya that one especially as I've SEEN how its made

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like offal - kidneys & liver are good for ya.

Salad cream adds a kick to a sandwich with a decent slice of ham, lettuce & tomato.

Haggis & Stornoway Black Pudding - no you can't have a good Scottish Hangover brekkie without em.

Peanut butter. No we should keep that & Nutella.

Ban Marmite.

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

definitely marmite.

Bovril! It stinks.

Hangovers - never had one so can't comment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like offal - kidneys & liver are good for ya.

Salad cream adds a kick to a sandwich with a decent slice of ham, lettuce & tomato.

Haggis & Stornoway Black Pudding - no you can't have a good Scottish Hangover brekkie without em.

Peanut butter. No we should keep that & Nutella.

Ban Marmite. "

Haggis- love

Salad cream- mmmm

Agree stornaway is by far the best.

Peanut butter and nuttela mmmm

marmite - love it on toast, roast potatoes too.

CELERY -F$#KING HATE THE STUFF!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

fixed penalty fines

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

semolina

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

Kippers and sardines

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Gherkins - bleurgh and boak

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like offal - kidneys & liver are good for ya.

Salad cream adds a kick to a sandwich with a decent slice of ham, lettuce & tomato.

Haggis & Stornoway Black Pudding - no you can't have a good Scottish Hangover brekkie without em.

Peanut butter. No we should keep that & Nutella.

Ban Marmite.

Haggis- love

Salad cream- mmmm

Agree stornaway is by far the best.

Peanut butter and nuttela mmmm

marmite - love it on toast, roast potatoes too.

CELERY -F$#KING HATE THE STUFF!!!!

I just KNEW I liked you from the start. I only like Stornoway Black Pudding & Celery is the work of the Devil I tell you. I think Van Helsing was WAY off the mark with the Garlic vs Vampires thing. He shoulda made a cross with two sticks of Celery & watch those bats get in a flap!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like offal - kidneys & liver are good for ya.

Salad cream adds a kick to a sandwich with a decent slice of ham, lettuce & tomato.

Haggis & Stornoway Black Pudding - no you can't have a good Scottish Hangover brekkie without em.

Peanut butter. No we should keep that & Nutella.

Ban Marmite.

Haggis- love

Salad cream- mmmm

Agree stornaway is by far the best.

Peanut butter and nuttela mmmm

marmite - love it on toast, roast potatoes too.

CELERY -F$#KING HATE THE STUFF!!!!

Aww thanks. Everything about it, the smell, the texture the taste just makes want to heave!

I'm just waiting now for bru to come up with a good one!

Do you think it will be celery related?

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By *ictiiWitchCouple
over a year ago

Helensburgh

Baked beans....even thinking about them makes me queasy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Fig rolls

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Butter beans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like offal - kidneys & liver are good for ya.

Salad cream adds a kick to a sandwich with a decent slice of ham, lettuce & tomato.

Haggis & Stornoway Black Pudding - no you can't have a good Scottish Hangover brekkie without em.

Peanut butter. No we should keep that & Nutella.

Ban Marmite.

Haggis- love

Salad cream- mmmm

Agree stornaway is by far the best.

Peanut butter and nuttela mmmm

marmite - love it on toast, roast potatoes too.

CELERY -F$#KING HATE THE STUFF!!!!

Aww thanks. Everything about it, the smell, the texture the taste just makes want to heave!

I'm just waiting now for bru to come up with a good one!

Do you think it will be celery related?

I'd have thought maybe BruBru would ban FAKE TAN LOTION. Heehee!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's the smelliest thing in the world!!!!An anchovies' fanny!!!!

on that premis Anchovies definately at the top of thw list!!!!

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

Tequila

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Flax seed oil and a big bar of chocolate

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Flax seed oil and a big bar of chocolate"

Don't be ridiculous you can't ban chocolate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Flax seed oil and a big bar of chocolate

Don't be ridiculous you can't ban chocolate

"
just the big bars Once I start on them I can't stop lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tequila

"
just cause it gives you a hangover cutie lol,marmite,cabbage and brussels soriuts should be on the list

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

Lol mr dlt..... You know me too well

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pork bellys

Pmsl

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Flax seed oil and a big bar of chocolate

Don't be ridiculous you can't ban chocolate

just the big bars Once I start on them I can't stop lol "

Well learn to share

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

oysters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oysters noo there a Afrodisiac

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Baked beans....even thinking about them makes me queasy

Me 2 can't stand the look or smell of them never mins the taste yuk!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ban prawns....sea insects masquerading as proper food...

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Liver

Kidney

Black pudding

Haggis

Sprouts

Celery

Semolina

Rice pudding

Non/low alkyhol beer (whats that all about)

Cabbage

Cauliflower

Broccoli

shell fish

Just for starters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

TRIPE!

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Oysters noo there a Afrodisiac "

I don't need an aphrodisiac sweetie

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We can't ban shellfish - I live oysters, prawns, langoustine, crab & lobster. Besides we need to keep Loch Fyne Oyster Bar open for my special lunches!

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"We can't ban shellfish - I live oysters, prawns, langoustine, crab & lobster. Besides we need to keep Loch Fyne Oyster Bar open for my special lunches!"

will you stop bloody disagreeing with everything I nominate please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Peas

Tripe

Celery

All fish

Offal

Tinned food - stew in a tin Ffs WRONG lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We can't ban shellfish - I live oysters, prawns, langoustine, crab & lobster. Besides we need to keep Loch Fyne Oyster Bar open for my special lunches!

will you stop bloody disagreeing with everything I nominate please

Naw!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"We can't ban shellfish - I live oysters, prawns, langoustine, crab & lobster. Besides we need to keep Loch Fyne Oyster Bar open for my special lunches!

will you stop bloody disagreeing with everything I nominate please

Naw!"

Gonae no dae that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can we ban Mondays?

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Can we ban Mondays?"

Seconded

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By *for funCouple
over a year ago

Dunfermline

Marzipan.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can we ban Mondays?"
but then we'd all just hate Tuesdays

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can we ban Mondays? but then we'd all just hate Tuesdays

They're next on the list till we get to Fridays - then we stop.

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By *ictiiWitchCouple
over a year ago

Helensburgh

*small voice*

I like celery.....

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

Im a typical Scot....

LOVE haggis/Black Pudding

HATE most vegetable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*small voice*

I like celery.....

So does john

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By *he Enigmatic MagnetMan
over a year ago

Glasgow West

Alcohol....

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By *ictiiWitchCouple
over a year ago

Helensburgh

"*small voice*

I like celery.....

So does john

It's good for you, doesn't really have calories and is crunchy and munchy. I eat tons of it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*small voice*

I like celery.....

So does john

It's good for you, doesn't really have calories and is crunchy and munchy. I eat tons of it.

"
yip I heard its good for your chest

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"*small voice*

I like celery.....

So does john

It's good for you, doesn't really have calories and is crunchy and munchy. I eat tons of it.

It may very well be good for you,be very low in calories and crunchy.....but its still minging

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"*small voice*

I like celery.....

So does john

It's good for you, doesn't really have calories and is crunchy and munchy. I eat tons of it.

It may very well be good for you,be very low in calories and crunchy.....but its still minging

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

It may very well be good for you,be very low in calories and crunchy.....but its still minging

like eating bits of string

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

"Im a typical Scot....

LOVE haggis/Black Pudding

HATE most vegetable

I'm the opposite...

LOVE veg, especially sprouts

HATE haggis, deep fried food and Buckfast

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

I'm the opposite...

LOVE veg, especially sprouts

HATE haggis, deep fried food and Buckfast

Thats it...

Your dumped!!!

*sob*

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By *ictiiWitchCouple
over a year ago

Helensburgh

I love chopped celery, cucumber and peppers with balsamic dressing....

I don't like the fashionable "leaves" that you get in salads now, although rocket on pizza is great.

I think we should ban paxo though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Caramel wagon wheels ehhhh

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

I'm the opposite...

LOVE veg, especially sprouts

HATE haggis, deep fried food and Buckfast

Thats it...

Your dumped!!!

*sob*

It gets worse.... I don't particularly like chocolate either!!!

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

I don't like the fashionable "leaves" that you get in salads now "

Give me nice crispy iceberg anyday....

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"Im a typical Scot....

LOVE haggis/Black Pudding

HATE most vegetable

What does that make me...i hate haggis/black pudding and veg

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm the opposite...

LOVE veg, especially sprouts

HATE haggis, deep fried food and Buckfast

Thats it...

Your dumped!!!

*sob*

It gets worse.... I don't particularly like chocolate either!!!

"
ehhh whits the matter way you

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

I'm the opposite...

LOVE veg, especially sprouts

HATE haggis, deep fried food and Buckfast

Thats it...

Your dumped!!!

*sob*

It gets worse.... I don't particularly like chocolate either!!!

Panic over folks...

We are back together again

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

"Im a typical Scot....

LOVE haggis/Black Pudding

HATE most vegetable

What does that make me...i hate haggis/black pudding and veg

A fussy fkr

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

I'm the opposite...

LOVE veg, especially sprouts

HATE haggis, deep fried food and Buckfast

Thats it...

Your dumped!!!

*sob*

It gets worse.... I don't particularly like chocolate either!!!

Panic over folks...

We are back together again

Woopwoop, give us a snog love

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"Im a typical Scot....

LOVE haggis/Black Pudding

HATE most vegetable

What does that make me...i hate haggis/black pudding and veg

A fussy fkr

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dragons soup

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

I would get over my weekends quicker if they banned OVD.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

whelks, cockles, snails, any 'curly' thing that comes out of a shell bleugghhhhhhhhhhh

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"I love chopped celery, cucumber and peppers with balsamic dressing....

I don't like the fashionable "leaves" that you get in salads now, although rocket on pizza is great.

I think we should ban paxo though. "

Never ever ban paxo!!!!!!! Christ, my eldest could live on it lmao

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

"
if you take the n away from your name it be spelt

bukie lol

cana stand it myself either

how they allow 2make this rubbish

same fr peanut butter disgusting

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

Can I add anchovies...... Boak

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jellied eels.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now if I wrote that it would say jelly seals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now if I wrote that it would say jelly seals"

Also banned I believe... along with smelly seals.

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

same fr peanut butter disgusting "

leave the peanut butter out of it

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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago

MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire)

Its not so much a particular substance... but overuse...

the wifie in front of me in the local coopy just now must have bathed in her perfume... I could bloody taste it from 5ft away, and it wasn't even a nice one. Smelled like a mix of cat pish and something way to flowery. Honking! SO can we please put overuse of heavily scented products on the ban list...

And bless my darling weeman - "mammy that lady smells funny" loud enough that 2 of the staff were grinning and nodded at him! How do you teach a 4 year old tact? (Not something I'm au fait with myself)

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By *mumaWoman
over a year ago

Livingston

Calamari

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tobacco.

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By *he Enigmatic MagnetMan
over a year ago

Glasgow West

"Tobacco."

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

"Tobacco."

As a smoker.......i couldnt agree more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tobacco."
as of today its ban v the shops

non smoker of 3 years also

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tobacco.as of today its ban v the shops

non smoker of 3 years also"

Good. I don't need to worry you'll bum a fag off me when we catch up at a Social. Lol!

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By *erverts R usCouple
over a year ago

Stirling

I Would ban frogs legs, periods and allowing people to live in agony for the remainder of their lives with no hope when you wouldn't allow an animal to suffer 5 minutes in the same pain. Sorry someone cheer us up since I depressed the thread AGAIN

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I Would ban frogs legs, periods and allowing people to live in agony for the remainder of their lives with no hope when you wouldn't allow an animal to suffer 5 minutes in the same pain. Sorry someone cheer us up since I depressed the thread AGAIN

Pass me the pink fluffy slippers & the whip till I whup Bru's butt. Feeling better?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Tobacco.as of today its ban v the shops

non smoker of 3 years also"

7yrs for both of us.

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

"Tobacco.as of today its ban v the shops

It not been banned

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

"Tobacco.

As a smoker.......i couldnt agree more

Probably only way I would quit

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

Cmere you.....Il put ya out your misery

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

"Peanut butter

Noooooooooooooooooo!!!

I cant survive without my Reeses pieces!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Peanut butter

Noooooooooooooooooo!!!

I cant survive without my Reeses pieces!!!

Aww Reece's cups. Nom nom nom!

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By *riendly foeWoman
over a year ago

In a crisp poke on the A814

"Peanut butter

Noooooooooooooooooo!!!

I cant survive without my Reeses pieces!!!

Aww Reece's cups. Nom nom nom!"

OMG! Yesssssssssssss

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By *uncouple981Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire

Twiglets should be banned!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Twiglets should be banned! "

Invented for the Ryveeta eaters budgies I think.

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By *uncouple981Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire

"Twiglets should be banned!

Invented for the Ryveeta eaters budgies I think. "

MrFC eats them then goes in for a kiss. God I must love that man to kiss him back.

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By *he Enigmatic MagnetMan
over a year ago

Glasgow West

"Twiglets should be banned! "

No, No, No. I am the only one in this house who likes twiglets, so Jacobs should just send their entire production to me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pate

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By *uncouple981Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange. "

Ooh I just bought some too. Picnic in the park?

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By *uncouple981Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange.

Ooh I just bought some too. Picnic in the park? "

Lovely I will bring the blanket

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange.

Ooh I just bought some too. Picnic in the park?

Lovely I will bring the blanket

You're such a little planner xxx

Beers & bubbly?

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By *uncouple981Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange.

Ooh I just bought some too. Picnic in the park?

Lovely I will bring the blanket

You're such a little planner xxx

Beers & bubbly?"

Beer for me thanks. Nice and refreshing when it's hot.

I will be waiting for you under the bush. Er I meant tree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange.

Ooh I just bought some too. Picnic in the park?

Lovely I will bring the blanket

You're such a little planner xxx

Beers & bubbly?

Beer for me thanks. Nice and refreshing when it's hot.

I will be waiting for you under the bush. Er I meant tree "

A bird in the branch is worth two under the bush.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange. "

You have it then, I cannot stand the stuff but its staying on my ban list

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By *uncouple981Couple
over a year ago

ayrshire

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange.

You have it then, I cannot stand the stuff but its staying on my ban list

Ok I will eat yours then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

cheese cock

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pate

You can't ban pâté I love it. Especially duck and orange.

You have it then, I cannot stand the stuff but its staying on my ban list

Ok I will eat yours then

"
hmmmmm sounds nice lol

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By *UNKIEMan
over a year ago

south east

Can we ban golf course bunkers please

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By *eeflower69Woman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"*small voice*

I like celery.....

So does john

So do I... Yummy stuff

As my gran used to say.

Celery raw is good for the jaw

But celery stewed is more quietly chewed.

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By *eeflower69Woman
over a year ago

edinburgh

"Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

Is it true

"Buckfast makes you fuck fast"

Never tried it so I wouldn't know ,however we do have a bottle in the cupboard , been there since we've been married!

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

Is it true

"Buckfast makes you fuck fast"

Never tried it so I wouldn't know ,however we do have a bottle in the cupboard , been there since

we've been married!

Never tried buckfast - but why would you want to go fast? Why not take your time?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

Is it true

"Buckfast makes you fuck fast"

Never tried it so I wouldn't know ,however we do have a bottle in the cupboard , been there since we've been married!

"
just no buckfast cause fights among young people an has proven in the past

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By *he Enigmatic MagnetMan
over a year ago

Glasgow West

"Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

Is it true

"Buckfast makes you fuck fast"

Never tried it so I wouldn't know ,however we do have a bottle in the cupboard , been there since

we've been married!

Never tried buckfast - but why would you want to go fast? Why not take your time?

It's because your average Scottish male just wants "his hole", and to get to the tickly bit!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ban dreich, grey, drizzly days.

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Ban dreich, grey, drizzly days. "

Deal!!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Alarm cocks, mine went off today and its a day off, don't like being rudely awaken its unnecessary!

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Alarm cocks, mine went off today and its a day off, don't like being rudely awaken its unnecessary!

It's not your alarms fault you didn't turn it off lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ha I've just seen I written cock instead of clock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh & can we ban mails from pals with offensive stripey boxers before I lose my breakfast? Lol!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ha I've just seen I written cock instead of clock.

Freudian slip? Or do we call it a Bruism?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Alarm cocks, mine went off today and its a day off, don't like being rudely awaken its unnecessary!

"
so basically you were awoken this morningby a cock lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Ha I've just seen I written cock instead of clock.

Freudian slip? Or do we call it a Bruism?"

I prefer a Charlie ism.

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By *lyce and Mister MCouple
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Buckfast......fecking vile stuff

Seconded

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By *ustcutieWoman
over a year ago

edinburgh

Can I add horseradish.... Just been reminded about the awful stuff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Can I add horseradish.... Just been reminded about the awful stuff

what's it for anyway? No don't tell me... it just sucks.

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By *adgeeMan
over a year ago

SWScotland

"Can we ban golf course bunkers please

Just ban golf!

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By *ndykay OP Man
over a year ago

Falkirk

"Ha I've just seen I written cock instead of clock.

I wasn't going to mention it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some days I think I should be a banned substance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Some days I think I should be a banned substance

Be careful what you wish for.

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