FabSwingers.com forum: Control

By *eah4545 OP Couple
20 weeks ago

glasgow

How do I get my man to take more control? Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing vanilla about us, however, I would like him to be a bit more forward. Any suggestions?

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By *ettercallsaul118Man
20 weeks ago

Funtown

Yes just Tell him communication is key ,make him aware you want this ,make sure he's comfortable with it .

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By *eah4545 OP Couple
20 weeks ago

glasgow

Absolutely agree. We communicate and he is happy but just never seems to initiate much although when we’re doing something it’s always. Maybe I’m just having a rant lol

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By *ittyScritchesWoman
20 weeks ago

Edinburgh

Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

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By *uietbloke67Man
20 weeks ago

outside your bedroom window ;-)

In what instances is he not taking enough control?

Talk it through, I'm assuming you have informed him of your wants and he is aware.

He might be holding back thinking what he is doing is enough.

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By *eah4545 OP Couple
20 weeks ago

glasgow

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation

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By *spressoMartini69xMan
20 weeks ago

Edinburgh

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation "

If he is a Cuck, why don’t you just lock up his cock and go fuck someone else?

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
20 weeks ago

E.K . Glasgow

Try coming in to the living room with something comfortable and slinky on then offer him your leash which is attached to your collar . ( I’d take the hint ) .

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By *vbride1963TV/TS
20 weeks ago

E.K . Glasgow

Hopefully that means the bedroom for you both if he goes for the front door and poo bags run .

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By *ookie69Man
20 weeks ago

Whistle Dixie

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation

If he is a Cuck, why don’t you just lock up his cock and go fuck someone else?

Did you read what the OP has asked?

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By (user no longer on site)
20 weeks ago

I think if you've brought it up and still not following through , perhaps take it off the table until he starts it , let him know though or you might find yourself months down the line , be clear and consise what you want to happen.

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By (user no longer on site)
20 weeks ago

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation

If he is a Cuck, why don’t you just lock up his cock and go fuck someone else?

where does the op say he is cuck or that she wants to go fuck someone else , thats the kind of advice that isnae helpful .

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By *rand Central CoupleCouple
20 weeks ago

Glasgow

He doesn’t initiate sex?

One of these is true ——

a) He doesn’t like sex

b) He doesn’t want sex with you

c) He is happy with what you initiate

d) He enjoys that you initiate it.

From what you’ve said I would be willing to bet it’s either c or d.

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By *ookie69Man
20 weeks ago

Whistle Dixie

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation

If he is a Cuck, why don’t you just lock up his cock and go fuck someone else?

where does the op say he is cuck or that she wants to go fuck someone else , thats the kind of advice that isnae helpful ."

100% agree x

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By *eah4545 OP Couple
20 weeks ago

glasgow

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation

If he is a Cuck, why don’t you just lock up his cock and go fuck someone else?

I do

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By *eah4545 OP Couple
20 weeks ago

glasgow

"He doesn’t initiate sex?

One of these is true ——

a) He doesn’t like sex

b) He doesn’t want sex with you

c) He is happy with what you initiate

d) He enjoys that you initiate it.

From what you’ve said I would be willing to bet it’s either c or d.

Haha that’s what he said “ I’m happy when you initiate it “ lol

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By *ookie69Man
20 weeks ago

Whistle Dixie

[Removed by poster at 01/07/24 19:01:37]

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By *allerthanaverage79Man
20 weeks ago

Ayrshire

"How do I get my man to take more control? Don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing vanilla about us, however, I would like him to be a bit more forward. Any suggestions?"

Maybe talk to him, tell him some idea if what you want???

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By *r-p-mrs-cCouple
20 weeks ago

near dumfries

Maybe his hormones are all over the place. Get his testosterone levels checked. I know when my test levels are low I'm not interested in sex, but will have sex if the mrs comes onto me.

So now i never let my test levels drop.

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By *oDramaLlamasCouple
20 weeks ago

Aberdeen

Maybe you just have a higher sex drive than him...could be that the poor guy is completely knackered lol

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By *spressoMartini69xMan
20 weeks ago

Edinburgh

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation

If he is a Cuck, why don’t you just lock up his cock and go fuck someone else?

where does the op say he is cuck or that she wants to go fuck someone else , thats the kind of advice that isnae helpful ."

If you look at her profile you would know that they are a cuck couple. I think my advice is sound.

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By (user no longer on site)
20 weeks ago

"Depends on why he's not 'following through' after your discussion.

If he's just agreeing to make you happy, and it's simply not his thing, then it's maybe just not realistic.

If it's a confidence issue then having a look at some resources, or having specific prompts from you until he gets comfortable with it might help.

If it's a big deal, individual or couples counselling might be worth considering.

Thanks. I see where you’re coming from. He’s totally comfortable with it when we get started and would be at it every night lol . It’s just no initiation

If he is a Cuck, why don’t you just lock up his cock and go fuck someone else?

where does the op say he is cuck or that she wants to go fuck someone else , thats the kind of advice that isnae helpful .

If you look at her profile you would know that they are a cuck couple. I think my advice is sound."

Nowhere in this thread does she mention cuck or her wanting to fuck anyone , so in regards to this thread her going to fuck someone else while caging his cock isnae helpful ,the advice was about how to get him to initiate sex .

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By *aldGingerMan
20 weeks ago

Glasgow

When I was in my 20s I wasn’t comfortable with it. I’ve always been confident and assertive, that wasn’t the issue. I just felt uncomfortable when it was brought up; but then my experience until then was mostly one night stands and pretty vanilla sex.

However my then girlfriend and I experimented with role play - she was big into erotic literature and wanted to try everything. It meant I felt I was acting it out rather than it being “me”. I felt then I was comfortable being assertive and “in control”.

It’s never left me.

Note it wasn’t dom/sub/switch stuff. She’d be assertive sometimes, and sometimes we’d both try to be and make it more fun.

For you both it might not be role play; ultimately for us it was the communication and finding a way to do something which didn’t feel as pressured as I felt when I was inexperienced. After that I was fine and really enjoyed it.

I knew her boundaries and mine, but we pushed them in a way which was comfortable for us both.

I still like to get to know someone before I know she’ll like it too; the fun bit is finding out what turns you both on!

All I’m saying is talk about it and see if you can find ways to start out lightly for him, and take it at a pace that feels natural. Doesn’t need to be extreme or weird. Good luck and more importantly have fun

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By *allerthanaverage79Man
20 weeks ago

Ayrshire

[Removed by poster at 02/07/24 18:23:59]

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By *allerthanaverage79Man
20 weeks ago

Ayrshire

If all else fails change his batteries! Lol

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