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That time you bought your lube in Morrisons

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

And the alarm went off going out the door, ooooffftttt Bag search.

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By *erberaWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

I once won a dildo in the raffle at an Ann Summers party and headed straight into town after. Bag got searched by bouncer at the pub. I just smiled when he saw it lol

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By *uietbloke67Man
over a year ago

outside your bedroom window ;-)


"I once won a dildo in the raffle at an Ann Summers party and headed straight into town after. Bag got searched by bouncer at the pub. I just smiled when he saw it lol"

Was it still in the box

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

Beware of airport scanners if you only have hand luggage, they show up EVERYTHING!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I ordered mine from Amazon. The package opened as the delivery guy handed it over. 2 bottles of lube and a butt plug fell out

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By *oShrinkingVioletWoman
over a year ago

the land of unicorns and fairytales


"Beware of airport scanners if you only have hand luggage, they show up EVERYTHING! "

Yup had that happen to me, well the actual toy started vibrating in my toiletries bag as soon as I dropped the tray on the rollers, wee auld wifey next to me says excuse me your bag is vibrating, worst thing was the security guy played in the band that my then bf was the sound engineer for and he gave me what a roasting and then phoned the bf to wind him up, and Derry airport security is very small

And quiet so everyone heard the commotion I sat at the back of the departures with my head buried in my iPad avoiding eye contact with everyone for the next hour

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By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.


"Beware of airport scanners if you only have hand luggage, they show up EVERYTHING!

Yup had that happen to me, well the actual toy started vibrating in my toiletries bag as soon as I dropped the tray on the rollers, wee auld wifey next to me says excuse me your bag is vibrating, worst thing was the security guy played in the band that my then bf was the sound engineer for and he gave me what a roasting and then phoned the bf to wind him up, and Derry airport security is very small

And quiet so everyone heard the commotion I sat at the back of the departures with my head buried in my iPad avoiding eye contact with everyone for the next hour "

The moral of the story is run the batteries down first. Suction cup dildoes can't be disguised though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just run it through the self service checkout

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I ordered mine from Amazon. The package opened as the delivery guy handed it over. 2 bottles of lube and a butt plug fell out "
Hope you had a snappy comeback .

"Well thats obviously not mine, must be the neighbors"

"Well there's obviously been a mix up,i ordered a bath plug ,and two bottles of soup "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I ordered mine from Amazon. The package opened as the delivery guy handed it over. 2 bottles of lube and a butt plug fell out Hope you had a snappy comeback .

"Well thats obviously not mine, must be the neighbors"

"Well there's obviously been a mix up,i ordered a bath plug ,and two bottles of soup " "

No I just stood there looking mortified as he picked them up and handed them to me.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I ordered mine from Amazon. The package opened as the delivery guy handed it over. 2 bottles of lube and a butt plug fell out Hope you had a snappy comeback .

"Well thats obviously not mine, must be the neighbors"

"Well there's obviously been a mix up,i ordered a bath plug ,and two bottles of soup "

No I just stood there looking mortified as he picked them up and handed them to me. "
Maybe if he was a part time plumber, you could have had a wild afternoon and held his pipes

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By *erberaWoman
over a year ago

Aberdeen

I used to get all my love honey deliveries sent to the office so my kids wouldn't open them by accident. You can imagine my horror when I visited the mail room and noticed a huge parcel scanner! Fingers were crossed that they had installed it after my last delivery

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I used to get all my love honey deliveries sent to the office so my kids wouldn't open them by accident. You can imagine my horror when I visited the mail room and noticed a huge parcel scanner! Fingers were crossed that they had installed it after my last delivery "
Hahahaha that would have been fun

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I ordered mine from Amazon. The package opened as the delivery guy handed it over. 2 bottles of lube and a butt plug fell out "

Pmsl brilliant

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