FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Scotland

Who goes first?

Jump to newest
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I’ve always worked on the basis that if I send the first message to someone on here, I would send the face pic first because I’m the one interested in them.

But if they where to send the first message, I’d expect them to send the first face pic.

Does anyone agree that this should be the way?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ringles0510Woman
over a year ago

Central Borders

You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"I’ve always worked on the basis that if I send the first message to someone on here, I would send the face pic first because I’m the one interested in them.

But if they where to send the first message, I’d expect them to send the first face pic.

Does anyone agree that this should be the way?"
only send a one when you feel comfortable to do so .

Never expect one to be returned just because you sent one tho as most will wait until they feel comfortable before sending

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I'm asking someone to exchange face pictures then id send first, if they asked me if expect them to send first.

I suppose, like is so often said on the forum, you do what works for you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If I'm asking someone to exchange face pictures then id send first, if they asked me if expect them to send first.

I suppose, like is so often said on the forum, you do what works for you. "

This is my point.

Now I’ve been blocked because I said no to going first.

Their response was - “We don’t send photos first to single guys!”

So glad that the conversation was stopped short.

These are the kind of people I don’t want to meet!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x"

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I just see how it goes.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *4Fun11Woman
over a year ago

Glasgow

I never send mine first but always reciprocate if we’ve agreed to swap

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *avie65Man
over a year ago

In the west.

I have sent them but only after I have been asked to. I've never been the first to ask for one.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andsCouple
over a year ago

Edin

If people send uninvited face pics I don’t send any back regardless of who messaged first

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If people send uninvited face pics I don’t send any back regardless of who messaged first "

That’s completely a different story but I’d be the same…

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I don't see the point in making a big performance over the swapping of face pics

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I don't see the point in making a big performance over the swapping of face pics "

You don’t?

Surely you’d want to see someone who’s asked to meet you?

What if there wasn’t an attraction?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ellinever70Woman
over a year ago

Ayrshire


"I don't see the point in making a big performance over the swapping of face pics

You don’t?

Surely you’d want to see someone who’s asked to meet you?

What if there wasn’t an attraction?

"

I manage that without a performance

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *lderChick65Woman
over a year ago

my town

Just send when comfy about it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I figure a face pic early on is kinda respectful.

When I arrange to meet, and it's a public place, wouldnt it be a little weird having to walk about with my cock out so they know it's me, if that was the first and only pic I'd sent?

I mean, you get put in handcuffs for doing that sort of thing, and get hit with a truncheon if you resist a little...sorry, its been a long day and I started slipping away there...

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I never send mine first but always reciprocate if we’ve agreed to swap "
same

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ookie69Man
over a year ago

Whistle Dixie

Send face pics ?

Feck! Hell noooooo.

Give it at least 6 months until I get to know ya, not unless I know ya

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People who send face pics within first three or so messages and say 'this is us'.... Are either just very keen or desperate

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why not send face pics don't see the big deal in it if I'm interested in someone's profile I'd prefer they knew who they were talking too

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I usually try and hold off as long as possible on sending my face pic .Cos i know once that's sent ,i can forget that potential meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I message a man first I'll send a face pic. No point him chatting to me if he thinks I look like Shrek and Donkey's love child.

If someone asks "do you have a face pic?" I think they should send first.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

I never send mine first, and will only send if I like the way the chat is going. I don't mind if they don't send their pic right away but I'd need to see it before arranging to meet as I don't do blind date

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ddkkk91Man
over a year ago

fife


"I never send mine first, and will only send if I like the way the chat is going. I don't mind if they don't send their pic right away but I'd need to see it before arranging to meet as I don't do blind date "

Imagine a blind date, then Sloth from Goonies shows up

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I message a man first I'll send a face pic. No point him chatting to me if he thinks I look like Shrek and Donkey's love child.

If someone asks "do you have a face pic?" I think they should send first.

"

This

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

I'll only send a face pic when I feel comfortable enough to do so, if they choose to send one early in the conversation I am not obliged to reciprocate. If the conversation is going well, and I'm seriously considering a social meet, then I'm happy to swap face pics but up until that point I won't.

If someone pretty much demands a face pic within the first few messages then it tells me they have different priorities than me and the conversation is unlikely to ho any further.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When I feel comfortable with it. Though if I'm asking to swap I'd send one first

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *arkwaitsforyouMan
over a year ago

glasgow

Think it has to work both ways if you are insisting on a face pic with first message you need to reciprocate

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *orl1971Couple
over a year ago

Glasgow

We hate the pressure of someone exchanging a couple of messages then looking for our pics.

We’ve actually found it’s easier to not exchange face pics and do a ‘blind social’ meet. It’s bizarrely worked well for us and even if you don’t take it to a second meet you generally have a good chat. Plus you don’t have people with face pics of you.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oudBeSurprisedMan
over a year ago

Fife


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good "

Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he Regina PhalangeWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

If I want to swap, I’ll ask but send mine first, no matter who sent the first message.

There are no hard and fast rules….it’s just a face pic!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good "

If they have that many verifications that makes me wonder if they are selective of who they meet or not…..

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good

Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.

"

That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *he Regina PhalangeWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good

If they have that many verifications that makes me wonder if they are selective of who they meet or not….. "

C’mon Jess. You are likely to accumulate 25 verifications off the back of the lunch social you have organised. Not all veris are play/sex based.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *xploring_FunWoman
over a year ago

Coventry


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good

If they have that many verifications that makes me wonder if they are selective of who they meet or not….. "

A couple of socials and two/three club visits and you could easily have that many, but hardly played.

It’s amazing how judgemental it is on here

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *parkle13Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

I like to wait and get one off the man first ..

If not my type I'll say ta but not for me .

I'll not send a pic .can u imagine being out one night or in asda and person comes up and says hey what was matter with me the. Ect . Knowing my luck ... so I'd rather not be known .also I'd never acknowledge them off the site .

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If people send uninvited face pics I don’t send any back regardless of who messaged first "
same...il only swap face pics if iv asked for a face pic to be sent.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good

Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.

That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them. "

Exactly this .. just because someone has alot of verifications doesn't mean they've played with them all , sociable people tend to have a lot more than others due to the fact they actually met people at socials .. and in any instance there's an old saying if your gonna point your finger at someone make sure your hands are clean , this really shouldn't be the place to try and shame others in what they choose to get up to sexually or otherwise.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ueen CatWoman
over a year ago

fife


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good

Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.

That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them.

Exactly this .. just because someone has alot of verifications doesn't mean they've played with them all , sociable people tend to have a lot more than others due to the fact they actually met people at socials .. and in any instance there's an old saying if your gonna point your finger at someone make sure your hands are clean , this really shouldn't be the place to try and shame others in what they choose to get up to sexually or otherwise. "

Exactly this

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *oudBeSurprisedMan
over a year ago

Fife


"You're not expected to attach a face picture straight away (unless their profile specifically mentions it - and a lot of them do). No harm in some random messages to establish you've got some common interests. I am more inclined to reply if someone does send it over though.

I tend to get the mug shots out the way pretty quickly, potentially saves loads of messaging back and forth to find in the end you dinnae fancy each other. And if I message someone first, I will attach my mug.

It's the ones that request to see you without attaching their own that tend to end up on my block list, that just screams pic collector / time waster x

On their profile it says we send photos straight away to avoid any problems.

They have over 70 verifications so they’re real.

I had no problem with thinking they may be just pic collectors.

Anyway… they’ve blocked me and I’ve blocked them back so it’s all good

Face pic aside, I'd never meet anyone that has 70 verifications.

That’s very presumptive of you. I have over 300 but I organise socials and many are from social events. Doesn’t mean I’ve I’ve played with all of them.

Exactly this .. just because someone has alot of verifications doesn't mean they've played with them all , sociable people tend to have a lot more than others due to the fact they actually met people at socials .. and in any instance there's an old saying if your gonna point your finger at someone make sure your hands are clean , this really shouldn't be the place to try and shame others in what they choose to get up to sexually or otherwise. "

Yeh that is one example, the other is when someone has hundreds of verifications detailing the sex they had explicitly in every verification.

Who is shaming? My preference (we are still allowed to have preferences aren't we?) is to be more selective and not get involved with someone that has had half the population of fab hanging out the back of them. There is no shame towards those that have, each to their own, I just prefer otherwise.

Preferences.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If I message a man first I'll send a face pic. No point him chatting to me if he thinks I look like Shrek and Donkey's love child.

If someone asks "do you have a face pic?" I think they should send first.

"

You look stunning

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top