FabSwingers.com forum: Rude

By *ert999400 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's still as rude as when you asked 2 weeks ago. No, it's not.

A DM is like junk mail, you didn't ask for it, it's an advert trying to entice you to reply. Very different to an official letter which requires a reply or there will be consequences.

This is the internet, different rules apply. Yeah in person it's rude to ignore people's attempts to talk to you but in person it's unlikely you'd get hundreds of people trying to talk to you at once whilst waving their dicks in your face.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

"
no it’s not rude at all !

If the official letter needs a reply then yes it would be replied to .

Junk mail that doesn’t !

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

With an approach of that sort buddy you will find your dms will go unread like a percentage of official letters do

Got to remember, nothing is guaranteed on fab. Bring a good attitude, treat others with respect and alas thine hot puss thou shall rain down upon thee…

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By *ooddoggyMan
over a year ago

town

Manners cost nothing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Can I play devils advocate?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

From a womans point of view.

No one has to reply, no one owes anyone a reply.

I do try to reply even just to say no thanks.

BUT half the time u get abuse back.

So its easier to just delete the ones your not interested in.

Were all adults, if someone doesnt reply take it on the chin, put on ur big boy / girl pants and move on. Simples.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"From a womans point of view.

No one has to reply, no one owes anyone a reply.

I do try to reply even just to say no thanks.

BUT half the time u get abuse back.

So its easier to just delete the ones your not interested in.

Were all adults, if someone doesnt reply take it on the chin, put on ur big boy / girl pants and move on. Simples.

"
This ^^^ a no reply should be taken as a not interested which to be fair most guys accept with the odd exception .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in the manners cost nothing camp. but...if its clear they havnt read my profile then no its not rude as its rude not too read my profile 1st.

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By *ooddoggyMan
over a year ago

town

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By *eliciouslySalaciousCouple
over a year ago

Glasgow

It's answered in the site's own FAQs:

https://m.fabswingers.com/articles/FAQ#noreply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

Re-read the type of messages you send buddy because I’ve just found it to be pushy and actually a little aggressive. I don’t care as I’d bet im a faster runner than you so you wouldn’t catch me, plus even if you did, I’m flexible so I’d manage to wriggle free. But, to females, that pushy style really isn’t welcome.

Chill a little man, with a more relaxed attitude life slows much better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When chatting to female friends on here they can get bombarded with up to hundreds of mail and if I was in that position I'd find it hard reply to all and on a weekly/daily basis they just can't get to them all.

A no reply on most occasions isn't personal and I do respect a thanks but no thanks but it must get boring and tedious doing that a lot and fabs here to compliment our life not be our life and got to respect people do things there own way.

With letters I can't imagine anyone getting the same amount of volume as on here.

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

Here's an example, a single male has just sent me this:

'Can I suck your asssss'

Why should I respond to that?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

Still not rude.

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By *om-4-SubMan
over a year ago

KILMARNOCK

Nah its not rude, it's an acknowledgement of no interest to pursue further communication from the intended recipient & that's an answer as crystal clear as your ever going to get.

Re official letters it would be wise to reply if further action will be taken if not file or spread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just to play devils advocate.

If we take an example that is sometimes used, about not sending dick pics. Its often said sending a dick pic is akin to walking upto soneone in a bar and getting your dick out. Which I agree with 100% unsolicited dick pics are just wrong.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

For the record I accept the no reply means you are not interested. But it can be a bit disheartening to send polite messages with some thought behind them to not even get a no thanks.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

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By *ert999400 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

"
I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in"
but should she if she’s not remotely interested in chatting to them ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

Why are you paraphrasing my argument?

I already set the terms that online and real life is the same. This idea has not been proposed by me, the idea that online and real life was set buy ladies on fab when they liken dick pics to walking up in a bar and getting your cock out.

So you have to answer the question onnthat context that has been set by the group who the OP has an issue with not replying.

And again for clarification, I am mearly playing devils advocate.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in"

OP are you trying to get people to hate you?

I want to retract my argument as devils advocate and have nothing to do with the OP.

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in"

Ah yes, it's always the woman's fault

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

Ah yes, it's always the woman's fault

Well you would eat that apple after god said not to!

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

OP are you trying to get people to hate you?

I want to retract my argument as devils advocate and have nothing to do with the OP."

No he isn't, but he refuses to acknowledge that the reason he's not getting meets is a problem at his end, and in his mind we're all stuck up bitches.

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

Ah yes, it's always the woman's fault

Well you would eat that apple after god said not to!

My bad, it just looked so tasty!

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By *ert999400 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

Ah yes, it's always the woman's fault

Well you would eat that apple after god said not to!

My bad, it just looked so tasty!

"
I would love to eat you

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

Ah yes, it's always the woman's fault

Well you would eat that apple after god said not to!

My bad, it just looked so tasty!

I would love to eat you"

My dude, just no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Why are you paraphrasing my argument?

So you have to answer the question onnthat context that has been set by the group who the OP has an issue with not replying.

And again for clarification, I am mearly playing devils advocate. "

Two things this, one, I paraphrased and explained the weakness of your point but still explained as to why it isn’t a practicable or viable point.

Two, I do not have to do anything just because you write words on an open forum.

I do not think you understand the meaning of putting across a devils advocate counter. But it’s Sunday, I’m chilled and having the last of what’s been a good weekend so, il pat you on the head softly, as patronising as possible, and wish you well little one x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

Ah yes, it's always the woman's fault

Well you would eat that apple after god said not to!

My bad, it just looked so tasty!

To be honest I would have eaten it aswell.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/08/22 12:46:34]

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By *o scandalousWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

Take it you’ve read the rules and FAQ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My dude, just no."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some folk clearly think you are guaranteed sex here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Do you get 'no thanks' replies from the men you message OP?

You've mentioned women in this thread but just wondering if it's only women who don't reply to all messages. Or if any other bi men want to chip in and say if men also don't always reply?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you get 'no thanks' replies from the men you message OP?

You've mentioned women in this thread but just wondering if it's only women who don't reply to all messages. Or if any other bi men want to chip in and say if men also don't always reply?

I tend to ignore the men who message a ‘hey’.

I’ll get maybe 8-10 a week. And I don’t have time for those.

OP imagine the women who get 80-100 a day.

Ain’t nobody got time for that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

nope no reply needed, have you ever seen a female or couples inbox,

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Do you get 'no thanks' replies from the men you message OP?

You've mentioned women in this thread but just wondering if it's only women who don't reply to all messages. Or if any other bi men want to chip in and say if men also don't always reply?

I tend to ignore the men who message a ‘hey’.

I’ll get maybe 8-10 a week. And I don’t have time for those.

OP imagine the women who get 80-100 a day.

Ain’t nobody got time for that "

Thanks for enlightening me

The last few times I have replied no thanks to someone, they have kept messaging. I've tried 101 different ways to try run the inbox but they all have pros and cons.

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By *rBlue2022Man
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

Depends on the circumstances.

Iv received a few DMs from gay guys when my profile clearly states Im looking for female, couple fun.

F, MF, FF....

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By *ohnandJulieCouple
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

A DM has nothing to do with an official letter.

It is not rude to read a DM and not reply.

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By *cottishMrsWoman
over a year ago

Wishaw

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in"

Why should she put effort in, at all? I try to reply to everyone, even if it's a no, which it always is just now. But, to suggest that if 100 men try to talk to a woman, she should 'put in some effort' and talk to them... Eh, why? If I'm on a night out, I'm trying to enjoy myself, not be polite to strangers who feel they have a God given right to speak to me.

I'm going to suggest the lack of reply from women on here is likely to do with your attitude. Given your response to Leia, it's obvious you see women as a sexual commodity. Not cool.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thanks for enlightening me

The last few times I have replied no thanks to someone, they have kept messaging. I've tried 101 different ways to try run the inbox but they all have pros and cons.

Best just to read, delete, move on.

Maybe that’s the issue. Haha messages don’t get deleted?

Personally, if I don’t get a reply, that’s it. I get the hint.

Maybe OP wants the messages deleted so it’s a clear ‘no’

Maybe I’m just stirring the pot?

We’ll never know

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

I ahould have asked this to begin with, why do you think a DM is similar to an official letter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would chip in woman or cpls that are getting 80/100 messages a day need to use their filters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

I ahould have asked this to begin with, why do you think a DM is similar to an official letter?"

Good point.

I've never had a letter from the Chairman of the Neighbourhood Watch asking if I'd like to watch him wank.

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By *riti PearWoman
over a year ago

Paisley

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

I'm going to suggest the lack of reply from women on here is likely to do with your attitude. Given your response to Leia, it's obvious you see women as a sexual commodity. Not cool."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

I'm going to suggest the lack of reply from women on here is likely to do with your attitude. Given your response to Leia, it's obvious you see women as a sexual commodity. Not cool."

It was me that used the analogy of a night out because its used when talking about dick pics being sent as first messages.

No that I disagree with not sending dick pics or not replying to messages.

But it could be argued that if you expect people to accept the analogy of tge dick pics you have to accept the extension of that analogy. This is pure from a devils advocate perspective.

My own opinion is, if something annoys anyone that much, justvleave the site, unless they get off on complaining about it. Which very well could be the case for many people.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No it's not rude. we ignore a huge number of messages on here, because either the sender has not read our profile or they are clearly message carpet bombing numerous people with the same cut and paste message. We get the same people sending the same message time after time. Even when you respond and politely say we are not interested, these people still send the same message.

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By *bwgirlygirlWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

I think it's more rude to not acknowledge people who comment on your forum post

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By *uffolkJohnMan
over a year ago

Newmarket

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

Personally I thinks it's politer to ignore them than to give the response that most DMs deserve. 'Hows yous?'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No it's not rude. we ignore a huge number of messages on here, because either the sender has not read our profile or they are clearly message carpet bombing numerous people with the same cut and paste message. We get the same people sending the same message time after time. Even when you respond and politely say we are not interested, these people still send the same message."

I wouldn't have the patience, I would just block them if they arent getting the message.

Would it be feasible to remove users who repeated pester other users with multiple messages after being told no thanks?

Because it does seem to be an ongoing issue.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"I think it's more rude to not acknowledge people who comment on your forum post

"
very much this ^^^^ they pull throw the Bonn then run away lol

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!

"I think it's more rude to not acknowledge people who comment on your forum post

very much this ^^^^ they pull throw the Bonn then run away lol

"
bomb*

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By *ab365XMan
over a year ago

Paisley

[Removed by poster at 14/08/22 17:56:09]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

An official letter from whom? Has the court been in touch again?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Is it rude not to reply to a dm. Is it rude not to reply to a official letter.

An official letter from whom? Has the court been in touch again?"

Let's hope so

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By *etLikeMan
over a year ago

most fundamental aspects

Well I’ve never received an official letter with only: “hi hru? Fancy a fuk” well not one that didn’t at least have Kind Regards after it

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By *incsladyandscotsmanCouple
over a year ago

North fife

It's not rude. It's a well known rule on fab that no answer is a polite no.

Sadly a 2 dimensional site like this can be cruel but we have life outside this and cannot reply to everyone.

Equally it is so obvious when people do not read the profile they are messaging....if they did they would see what we are looking for

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By *alcon43Woman
over a year ago

Paisley

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in"

If someone spoke to me in a pub using the same language in some of the messages then they’d be wearing my drink!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If someone spoke to me in a pub using the same language in some of the messages then they’d be wearing my drink! "

this 100%

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

If someone spoke to me in a pub using the same language in some of the messages then they’d be wearing my drink! "

I wouldn't waste a drink on them.

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By *assy LassieWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in"

And this is an example if why a return polite message of disinterest in chatting turned into 3 hrs back and forth as to why not. Being pushy and entitled is not attractive.

Yip I was bored for a bit and wondered how many ways it was possible to say no....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

And this is an example if why a return polite message of disinterest in chatting turned into 3 hrs back and forth as to why not. Being pushy and entitled is not attractive.

Yip I was bored for a bit and wondered how many ways it was possible to say no.... "

I would have blocked and reported them. Did you try fuck off you weirdo?

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By *essaWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

Not rude AT ALL! I get loads of messages, lots of which say “hi how are you?” And there’s no photos, nothing. I genuinely don’t have time to respond to them all. Plus I actually think just ignoring it is better than explaining why I’m not interested! If you don’t get an answer, take it as a no and move on. I don’t like to hurt people by explaining it’s a no. And for what it’s worth, any time I have engaged with someone to say “thanks but no” they take it as an invitation to bombard me with more messages!

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By *assy LassieWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

And this is an example if why a return polite message of disinterest in chatting turned into 3 hrs back and forth as to why not. Being pushy and entitled is not attractive.

Yip I was bored for a bit and wondered how many ways it was possible to say no....

I would have blocked and reported them. Did you try fuck off you weirdo?"

I am never so uncouth as to utter such profanities

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

If someone spoke to me in a pub using the same language in some of the messages then they’d be wearing my drink!

I wouldn't waste a drink on them.

Yeah, don't waste your drink. Use theirs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

And this is an example if why a return polite message of disinterest in chatting turned into 3 hrs back and forth as to why not. Being pushy and entitled is not attractive.

Yip I was bored for a bit and wondered how many ways it was possible to say no....

I would have blocked and reported them. Did you try fuck off you weirdo?

I am never so uncouth as to utter such profanities

Let me do it for you

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By *assy LassieWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

And this is an example if why a return polite message of disinterest in chatting turned into 3 hrs back and forth as to why not. Being pushy and entitled is not attractive.

Yip I was bored for a bit and wondered how many ways it was possible to say no....

I would have blocked and reported them. Did you try fuck off you weirdo?

I am never so uncouth as to utter such profanities

Let me do it for you

Yer fine. I can look after myself. I'm an independent woman ya know

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By *parkle13Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Here's an example, a single male has just sent me this:

'Can I suck your asssss'

Why should I respond to that?

Depends .are they hot .??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just to play devils advocate.

So if we use a similar argument, if a guy walked upto you in a bar and spoke to you in a polite way, would you just ignore him?

The point here though is that online is very different to an in-person situation. About 3/4’s of the men that dm women here wouldn’t approach them in a bar, just wouldn’t do it.

But for the sake of it, say they do and a female gets 100+ guys go up to speak to her when she’s in a pub for 2-3 hours, it would physically be impossible to speak to them all.

I disagree, she could gob of to all if she but her drink down, and put some effort in

And this is an example if why a return polite message of disinterest in chatting turned into 3 hrs back and forth as to why not. Being pushy and entitled is not attractive.

Yip I was bored for a bit and wondered how many ways it was possible to say no....

I would have blocked and reported them. Did you try fuck off you weirdo?

I am never so uncouth as to utter such profanities

Let me do it for you

Yer fine. I can look after myself. I'm an independent woman ya know

Go on, I need an excuse to swear at someone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Here's an example, a single male has just sent me this:

'Can I suck your asssss'

Why should I respond to that?

Maybe a link to some kind of therapist?

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

A DM on a swingers site isn't remotely the same as an official letter for a start. No reply means not interested on here, that is explained clearly in the site FAQs. An official letter wouldn't automatically qualify for a reply either.

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By *eiaorganaWoman
over a year ago

Dundee

"Here's an example, a single male has just sent me this:

'Can I suck your asssss'

Why should I respond to that?

Depends .are they hot .??"

Couldn't tell you, 4 cock pics and thats it

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By *he Regina PhalangeWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

"Manners cost nothing

No, but they cost time!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Manners cost nothing

No, but they cost time!"

So technically they do cost something.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Here's an example, a single male has just sent me this:

'Can I suck your asssss'

Why should I respond to that?

Depends .are they hot .??

Couldn't tell you, 4 cock pics and thats it "

Gutted. Was hoping this would unfold a bit more.

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By *ert999400 OP Man
over a year ago

Glasgow

"It's still as rude as when you asked 2 weeks ago. No, it's not.

A DM is like junk mail, you didn't ask for it, it's an advert trying to entice you to reply. Very different to an official letter which requires a reply or there will be consequences.

Did I ask 2 weeks ago

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You've typed in the middle of the quote there OP?

OP do you have a pal called Ernie?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've typed in the middle of the quote there OP?

OP do you have a pal called Ernie?"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've typed in the middle of the quote there OP?

OP do you have a pal called Ernie?

I was trying to set someone up with a muppet joke

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've typed in the middle of the quote there OP?

OP do you have a pal called Ernie?

I was trying to set someone up with a muppet joke

Bert and Ernie was Sesame Street

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some folk say that charging to use the site would get rid of a lot of problems such as the fact many don’t understand the site rule on a non response being a polite no thanks but I like the fact the site is free and easy to use. I also don’t think it would help that much. Yes, one can use ones filters but then one misses out on chatting to some very lovely people.

I wonder if having a simple questionnaire with questions such as “What should a non response to your message be taken as?” might at least raise awareness and improve the “fab experience” for everyone.

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By *macunninglinguistMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

"You've typed in the middle of the quote there OP?

OP do you have a pal called Ernie?

I was trying to set someone up with a muppet joke

Bert and Ernie was Sesame Street

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I honestly fail to see what is gained from having a 'no thanks' reply rather than your message deleted?

It doesn't change the outcome.

Or is it when it's read and left sitting without deletion or reply?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've typed in the middle of the quote there OP?

OP do you have a pal called Ernie?

I was trying to set someone up with a muppet joke

Bert and Ernie was Sesame Street

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there. "

Oh you Animal!!

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By *ife NinjaMan
over a year ago

Dunfermline

"Here's an example, a single male has just sent me this:

'Can I suck your asssss'

Why should I respond to that?

Tell them you have a small abces, and they're welcome

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By *IGDADDYBEAR69Man
over a year ago

GLASGOW

"I honestly fail to see what is gained from having a 'no thanks' reply rather than your message deleted?

It doesn't change the outcome.

Or is it when it's read and left sitting without deletion or reply?

That one always gets me… i usually got back 3/4 weeks and have a look and if its not deleted i try again and if they dont respond i usually block them myself to stop me accidentally sending another message and wasting my own time…

I take a no reply and a deleted as not interested

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Or is it when it's read and left sitting without deletion or reply?

Haha that’s it. He hates the blue ticks of death.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there. "

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it

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By *macunninglinguistMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it "

Sounds like you need to work on your gag reflex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it

Sounds like you need to work on your gag reflex. "

That almost sounds like an offer to help

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"You've typed in the middle of the quote there OP?

OP do you have a pal called Ernie?

I was trying to set someone up with a muppet joke

Bert and Ernie was Sesame Street

Don't be a grouch!

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By *macunninglinguistMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it

Sounds like you need to work on your gag reflex.

That almost sounds like an offer to help

See Bert

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it

Sounds like you need to work on your gag reflex.

That almost sounds like an offer to help

See Bert

What about me

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By *macunninglinguistMan
over a year ago

Aberdeenshire

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it

Sounds like you need to work on your gag reflex.

That almost sounds like an offer to help

See Bert

What about me

Sorry -

See Bert or Dr When.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it

Sounds like you need to work on your gag reflex.

That almost sounds like an offer to help

See Bert

What about me

Sorry -

See Bert or Dr When. "

Thats more like it! You know me I always like to be included.

Hate to feel left out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup. He's Kermitted a crime against comedy there.

This made me sick in my mouth a bit. So worth it

Sounds like you need to work on your gag reflex.

That almost sounds like an offer to help

See Bert

What about me

Sorry -

See Bert or Dr When.

Thats more like it! You know me I always like to be included.

Hate to feel left out

Haha well lucky me. Such supportive people In Here.

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By *xploring_FunWoman
over a year ago

Coventry

"I would chip in woman or cpls that are getting 80/100 messages a day need to use their filters

Lots of people miss that this is a reason not to reply.

When you put filters on anyone you’ve communicated with can bypass it. Even if all you’ve done is said “no thanks”

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By *xploring_FunWoman
over a year ago

Coventry

"Some folk say that charging to use the site would get rid of a lot of problems such as the fact many don’t understand the site rule on a non response being a polite no thanks but I like the fact the site is free and easy to use. I also don’t think it would help that much. Yes, one can use ones filters but then one misses out on chatting to some very lovely people.

I think charging more/charging everyone would make the site worse.

Can you imagine the entitlement of some if they were paying for the site? It would be off the scale - akin to some of the guys who end up fuming when they pay to go to a club but then don’t end up with queues of women offering them sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think charging more/charging everyone would make the site worse.

To be clear, yes that was what I said. I don’t think charging is the answer. Good point on the entitlement card though.

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By *parkle13Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

Just answered a message to meet in a hotel in town from a guy from London.. says its a no from me read my profile...he answered back ..your too fat anyway and blocks me so there's why we don't bother answering

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Just answered a message to meet in a hotel in town from a guy from London.. says its a no from me read my profile...he answered back ..your too fat anyway and blocks me so there's why we don't bother answering "

He sounds like a right t**t! Ps you're anything but fat x

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By *lexanderSupertrampMan
over a year ago

Gourock

He sounds like a right t**t! Ps you're anything but fat x"

Totally agree

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The sign of a bruised and fragile ego.

Or a complete walloper.

Probably both.

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