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Have the vibes changed?

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By *llWomanButNoLady OP   Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

I’ve been around off and on for a few years and I just recently came back again. I feel like there’s more guys just messaging expecting sex straightaway and going in the huff if you say no and explain you have a life that takes precedence. Or they’re more against chatting to get comfortable first. Is it just me or has the vibe changed around here?

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By *iimonMan
over a year ago

glasgow

I think that seams to be the case. I’ve see a good few comments like that. And it’s not just women that get it haha. I’ve blocked all men from messaging me. It was waaaay too intense!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd say so yes

Don't know how many times iv been called a time waster because I won't meet without a social 1st

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think it's changed at all in my time here

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By *llWomanButNoLady OP   Woman
over a year ago

Dundee

I’m glad it’s not just not me then! It’s a bit disheartening though, I used to have some great times here and made some great friends. Some who I’m still in touch with. Wonder what’s brought about this change?

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By *llWomanButNoLady OP   Woman
over a year ago

Dundee


"I don't think it's changed at all in my time here"

Wonder if it’s more where I am? How long have you been on for? I’ve been off and on for about 6 years.

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By *ike OxmallMan
over a year ago

Elderslie

I've not noticed a massive change, but then again, hardly anyone ever messages me!

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By *indfkdWoman
over a year ago

glasgow


"I don't think it's changed at all in my time here

Wonder if it’s more where I am? How long have you been on for? I’ve been off and on for about 6 years. "

In my opinion its always had the sort of guy that believe the site is for a quick shag because that is their idea of a "swinger" unfortunately

But over the past year and a half its got a lot worse, I choose to hide my profile because im fed up of the mails you get where they expect you to be jumping on them because they offered " its a swinging site but you don't want to swing" well actually I do just not with you because I dont know anything about you (personality wise)

Its a sad state of affairs, ive been on and off here for 10yrs + and had some amazing meets and some good friends

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By *llWomanButNoLady OP   Woman
over a year ago

Dundee


"I don't think it's changed at all in my time here

Wonder if it’s more where I am? How long have you been on for? I’ve been off and on for about 6 years.

In my opinion its always had the sort of guy that believe the site is for a quick shag because that is their idea of a "swinger" unfortunately

But over the past year and a half its got a lot worse, I choose to hide my profile because im fed up of the mails you get where they expect you to be jumping on them because they offered " its a swinging site but you don't want to swing" well actually I do just not with you because I dont know anything about you (personality wise)

Its a sad state of affairs, ive been on and off here for 10yrs + and had some amazing meets and some good friends

"

Yeah, there’s definitely always been an element of that just seems to have ramped up a bit. Probably fecking lockdown caused it because they couldn’t go out to a pub or a club and pull like before. Like you I’ve had some amazing times on here and i’d like to have more, it’s just a wee bit disheartening.

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By *llWomanButNoLady OP   Woman
over a year ago

Dundee


"I've not noticed a massive change, but then again, hardly anyone ever messages me!"

It’s cos you’re a man and your name is Mike Oxmall. Change it to ‘I have a large penis’ and see if that works.

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By *coupleoforangesCouple
over a year ago

Edinburgh / Stirlingshire / Glasgow-ish

People being allergic to socials seems to be a bit of a theme. If someone wants straight up sex with out any form social or chemistry test. They should just hire a SW and be done with it.

Also the amount of times our account has been messages just asking if I'm "free" for a meet as if my partner is my keeper. Someone once just asked if "they could have a go on me"

Now I know this isn't a dating site.There should still be level of manners and respect that should be given to all users. Approaching folk like unpaid SW isn't the way to do that.

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By *llWomanButNoLady OP   Woman
over a year ago

Dundee


"People being allergic to socials seems to be a bit of a theme. If someone wants straight up sex with out any form social or chemistry test. They should just hire a SW and be done with it.

Also the amount of times our account has been messages just asking if I'm "free" for a meet as if my partner is my keeper. Someone once just asked if "they could have a go on me"

Now I know this isn't a dating site.There should still be level of manners and respect that should be given to all users. Approaching folk like unpaid SW isn't the way to do that."

This!!! So much this! That’s exactly what they’re approaching people like! And you’re right about the socials allergy thats prevalent lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I agree with a lot of the above but think it’s worse since the internet has exploded over the years. Bad manners and keyboard warriors are a disgusting side effect of social media in general.

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By *hatsmynameagainCouple
over a year ago

Ayrshire

I think that with the site being mentioned in the media and on Jeremy Kyle it brought more people thinking it was a hook up site rather than for people looking to explore the swinging lifestyle.

Although it has been debated a few times what swinging actually means. Some people see it as NSA where as others see it more as a social activity or for sex enthusiasts

Mr

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By *esssDanMan
over a year ago

Dundee

Jeremy Kyle?! Oh no.... Missed that news, but cannot be good

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By *ookie69Man
over a year ago

Whistle Dixie


"I’ve been around off and on for a few years and I just recently came back again. I feel like there’s more guys just messaging expecting sex straightaway and going in the huff if you say no and explain you have a life that takes precedence. Or they’re more against chatting to get comfortable first. Is it just me or has the vibe changed around here? "

I hear what you're saying here..

But also, if you're on a swinging site for sex why would you not expect a guy too message you.He doesn't want a relationship. He doesn't want to be you're best friend.He wants NSA sex.

Okay, it doesn't fit you're criteria in what maybe you seek.But guys asking for sex..seems the nature of the site. You have the filters to change that.

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By *oanne_MacTV/TS
over a year ago

Perth


"I’ve been around off and on for a few years and I just recently came back again. I feel like there’s more guys just messaging expecting sex straightaway and going in the huff if you say no and explain you have a life that takes precedence. Or they’re more against chatting to get comfortable first. Is it just me or has the vibe changed around here?

I hear what you're saying here..

But also, if you're on a swinging site for sex why would you not expect a guy too message you.He doesn't want a relationship. He doesn't want to be you're best friend.He wants NSA sex.

Okay, it doesn't fit you're criteria in what maybe you seek.But guys asking for sex..seems the nature of the site. You have the filters to change that.

"

I think Shes grumbling more at the low effort, sense of entitlement message many guys send out.

Yes it's a casual hook up site but plenty want more than a 10mn blow n go shite meet, especially if they've juggled commitments to be free and spent some time getting ready.

Ok, most of us are looking for no strings fun, but it's the attitude of many that just think its 'instashag' and treat people like a piece of meat that the OP is grumbling at..ok the guys want a shag, fair enough... but the majority could do with finding some manners. They'd possibly be more successful too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve been around off and on for a few years and I just recently came back again. I feel like there’s more guys just messaging expecting sex straightaway and going in the huff if you say no and explain you have a life that takes precedence. Or they’re more against chatting to get comfortable first. Is it just me or has the vibe changed around here?

I hear what you're saying here..

But also, if you're on a swinging site for sex why would you not expect a guy too message you.He doesn't want a relationship. He doesn't want to be you're best friend.He wants NSA sex.

Okay, it doesn't fit you're criteria in what maybe you seek.But guys asking for sex..seems the nature of the site. You have the filters to change that.

I think Shes grumbling more at the low effort, sense of entitlement message many guys send out.

Yes it's a casual hook up site but plenty want more than a 10mn blow n go shite meet, especially if they've juggled commitments to be free and spent some time getting ready.

Ok, most of us are looking for no strings fun, but it's the attitude of many that just think its 'instashag' and treat people like a piece of meat that the OP is grumbling at..ok the guys want a shag, fair enough... but the majority could do with finding some manners. They'd possibly be more successful too "

Beautifully put, as always

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By *eedsmale36Man
over a year ago

Leeds


"I think that with the site being mentioned in the media and on Jeremy Kyle it brought more people thinking it was a hook up site rather than for people looking to explore the swinging lifestyle.

Although it has been debated a few times what swinging actually means. Some people see it as NSA where as others see it more as a social activity or for sex enthusiasts

Mr"

You quote Jeremy Kyle but are you willing to take a lie detector test to prove it ?

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By *achylBondTV/TS
over a year ago

Glasgow

I think it might be all the frustrations being unleashed after all the restrictions of the last 18 months but it doesn't excuse rudeness and bad manners xx

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By *ookie69Man
over a year ago

Whistle Dixie


"I’ve been around off and on for a few years and I just recently came back again. I feel like there’s more guys just messaging expecting sex straightaway and going in the huff if you say no and explain you have a life that takes precedence. Or they’re more against chatting to get comfortable first. Is it just me or has the vibe changed around here?

I hear what you're saying here..

But also, if you're on a swinging site for sex why would you not expect a guy too message you.He doesn't want a relationship. He doesn't want to be you're best friend.He wants NSA sex.

Okay, it doesn't fit you're criteria in what maybe you seek.But guys asking for sex..seems the nature of the site. You have the filters to change that.

I think Shes grumbling more at the low effort, sense of entitlement message many guys send out.

Yes it's a casual hook up site but plenty want more than a 10mn blow n go shite meet, especially if they've juggled commitments to be free and spent some time getting ready.

Ok, most of us are looking for no strings fun, but it's the attitude of many that just think its 'instashag' and treat people like a piece of meat that the OP is grumbling at..ok the guys want a shag, fair enough... but the majority could do with finding some manners. They'd possibly be more successful too "

This is true Jo.

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By *mmixtapeCouple
over a year ago

middle earth

Definitely worse than before lockdown. I put out a status looking for chat last night, got some "hey, how was your day's" a few hours later which I checked then ignored while i was sleeping. I've woken up to three gents throwing their toys because I didn't respond quickly enough, then when I explained I was sleeping they all started becoming abusive.

This place is something else at the moment

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By *ookie69Man
over a year ago

Whistle Dixie


"Definitely worse than before lockdown. I put out a status looking for chat last night, got some "hey, how was your day's" a few hours later which I checked then ignored while i was sleeping. I've woken up to three gents throwing their toys because I didn't respond quickly enough, then when I explained I was sleeping they all started becoming abusive.

This place is something else at the moment "

There's a lot of that I presume..

Desperation is ugly.

Always happy too chat x

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By *oanne_MacTV/TS
over a year ago

Perth


"Definitely worse than before lockdown. I put out a status looking for chat last night, got some "hey, how was your day's" a few hours later which I checked then ignored while i was sleeping. I've woken up to three gents throwing their toys because I didn't respond quickly enough, then when I explained I was sleeping they all started becoming abusive.

This place is something else at the moment "

I'm assuming you mean you read them then went to sleep?

Schoolgirl error no1, mark them back as unread before shutting site down before deciding in morning if worth replying to

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By *he Regina PhalangeWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire


"Definitely worse than before lockdown. I put out a status looking for chat last night, got some "hey, how was your day's" a few hours later which I checked then ignored while i was sleeping. I've woken up to three gents throwing their toys because I didn't respond quickly enough, then when I explained I was sleeping they all started becoming abusive.

This place is something else at the moment

I'm assuming you mean you read them then went to sleep?

Schoolgirl error no1, mark them back as unread before shutting site down before deciding in morning if worth replying to "

I do this!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I pretty much say this to most guys I chat to, that things have got worse. Take yesterday, this guy didn't want to talk about anything except sex. He pointed out that "this is a sex site" to which I replied, no shit, I do not need you telling me that. He took the hump as I wanted to talk about something other than sex. Clearly there are still some men on here who are unable to have a proper conversation with us. He was hard work so I put a stop to it as he was being an ass about it x

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