FabSwingers.com mobile

Join us FREE, we're FREE to use

Web's largest swingers site since 2006.

Already registered?
Login here

Back to forum list
Back to Scotland

Why don't ladies message?

Jump to newest
 

By *estendrogue OP   Man
over a year ago

glasgow

So I was going through my messages and the whole time I've been on here only 9 ladies have messaged me first. Is that a high number or not?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"So I was going through my messages and the whole time I've been on here only 9 ladies have messaged me first. Is that a high number or not?"
I message those Im interested in

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *imbobaMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"So I was going through my messages and the whole time I've been on here only 9 ladies have messaged me first. Is that a high number or not?"

How long have you been on here? One year, 9 would be slightly below average I think. 5 years. Oh dearie me.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I was going through my messages and the whole time I've been on here only 9 ladies have messaged me first. Is that a high number or not?"

Because ladies get pestered that much the dont need to message anyone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We're just not that into you....

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ing_of_the_swingers400Man
over a year ago

edinbugh


"So I was going through my messages and the whole time I've been on here only 9 ladies have messaged me first. Is that a high number or not?"

I would say your lucky as I think I’ve had 1 lady message me first and that was because of a forum game lol

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I was going through my messages and the whole time I've been on here only 9 ladies have messaged me first. Is that a high number or not?"

I’ll always message someone first if I’m into them!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn

Because some couldn't cope with rejection in the same way as some guys can't.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *rgoodnbadMan
over a year ago

greenock

They simply don't have to and by the time they delete what's in their inbox they don't have the time anyway

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I message men usually to pay them a compliment or respond to something they have said on the forum.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *andsCouple
over a year ago

Edin

I message if I like the look of blokes x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I message if I like the look of blokes x"

Aherm x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If so many men wernt so shit to the ladies s nice guys would have a better shot

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly, I can't be bothered.

Aside from my crippling fear of rejection, searching and being disappointed in what I find seems like too much effort

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ilveryFoxMan
over a year ago

Midlothian


"So I was going through my messages and the whole time I've been on here only 9 ladies have messaged me first. Is that a high number or not?"

They welcome the chase?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iewMan
Forum Mod
over a year ago

Angus & Findhorn


"If so many men wernt so shit to the ladies s nice guys would have a better shot "

Nice guys will do just fine if they conduct themselves as such, in the same way as nice females do. The problematic in both genders don't.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"If so many men wernt so shit to the ladies s nice guys would have a better shot

Nice guys will do just fine if they conduct themselves as such, in the same way as nice females do. The problematic in both genders don't."
Spot on View

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *estendrogue OP   Man
over a year ago

glasgow

So 9 messages in a year is lucky or below what other guys get?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been on 5 weeks and still waiting for a female to message me but im patient and covid is fucking everything up

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *implyJayGeeMan
over a year ago

Garthamlock

Definitely would be nice to receive a wee first message. Doesn’t help that I have a heavily guarded profile but I have my reasons for that which a lot of folk seem to not like. Privacy is privacy and should be respected.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Because some couldn't cope with rejection in the same way as some guys can't. "

This

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Because some couldn't cope with rejection in the same way as some guys can't."

True this. Not enough women have been told "no thanks" by guys. Really puts their knickers in a twist.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would love to have that many women messaging me haha but gentlemen should make the first move

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe you're not what they're looking for, maybe they think they're not what you're looking for.

Or maybe they just don't know how to make the first move.

If I like the look of someone, I'll wink. Not because I'm lazy but purely to test the waters. Not everyone responds to winks though.

So I may have screwed myself over, but that's my fault x

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A lot of them don't need to they get plenty of messages to choose from either that or they don't like to message first also you may not be what they are looking for

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ootall2920Man
over a year ago

Linlithgow

Not sure why they don't message me. It's provably a combination of:

They're not attracted to me.

Don't like what's on my profile.

Too far away.

Too close by.

I've been on here too long.

And they generally have the pick of the boys.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *hav02Man
over a year ago

Glasgow/London


"So 9 messages in a year is lucky or below what other guys get?"

more likely 9 men pretending to be women; and number is irrelevant. I'd rather than 1 good friend here than 9 nonsense messages.

Majority of men on here see the site as freesex so just harass/spam the good women folk, expecting women to be desperate for sex. Not the case at all!

The decent respectful guys on here have no problems meeting women though

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)"

Aren't you a clever boy getting 6 non fatties to message you. What's your secret? Your charm?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So 9 messages in a year is lucky or below what other guys get?

more likely 9 men pretending to be women; and number is irrelevant. I'd rather than 1 good friend here than 9 nonsense messages.

Majority of men on here see the site as freesex so just harass/spam the good women folk, expecting women to be desperate for sex. Not the case at all!

The decent respectful guys on here have no problems meeting women though "

If it's not free sex ..what is it?

I wouldnt expect women to be desperate, but I would expect them to have an interest in sex.

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 02/09/20 16:50:27]

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)

Aren't you a clever boy getting 6 non fatties to message you. What's your secret? Your charm? "

Oh I'm very charming and brutally honest

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)"

Awww the fatties don't fancy you anyway so I wouldn't worry your head about it

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It must be that spam folder at it again mate, sometimes too many messages can overload it hahaha

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ittleRed18Woman
over a year ago

Aberdeen


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)"

Get in the bin!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edeWoman
over a year ago

the abyss


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)

Aren't you a clever boy getting 6 non fatties to message you. What's your secret? Your charm?

Oh I'm very charming and brutally honest "

^^ and herein lies the reason why I never message first!!!

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ladies do message first but they often don’t have to. This is simple arithmetic, the ratio of men to women is reckoned as anything from 25 to 1 up. Therefore women can choose from those that message them or engage by going in chat or the forums for example. They will often then be messaged from that. However women do message, they just don’t do it the way men do. If a woman messages she’s probably thought about it, read the profile and found something genuinely worth her interest. Men tend to message lots of women just hoping for a response (meet) fancy-a-fuck style.

Disclaimer: I’m well aware there are women here who use the site badly and very charming, articulate and intelligent men here, hell I’ve even met a couple of them. There are behaviour patterns though, the above is merely my observation

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

maybe we’re just ugly bro

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *edGlasgowMan
over a year ago

Glasgow


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)

Aren't you a clever boy getting 6 non fatties to message you. What's your secret? Your charm?

Oh I'm very charming and brutally honest

^^ and herein lies the reason why I never message first!!! "

I'd be all over the niceness, so message me first

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ing_of_the_swingers400Man
over a year ago

edinbugh


"Ladies do message first but they often don’t have to. This is simple arithmetic, the ratio of men to women is reckoned as anything from 25 to 1 up. Therefore women can choose from those that message them or engage by going in chat or the forums for example. They will often then be messaged from that. However women do message, they just don’t do it the way men do. If a woman messages she’s probably thought about it, read the profile and found something genuinely worth her interest. Men tend to message lots of women just hoping for a response (meet) fancy-a-fuck style.

Disclaimer: I’m well aware there are women here who use the site badly and very charming, articulate and intelligent men here, hell I’ve even met a couple of them. There are behaviour patterns though, the above is merely my observation "

Oh jeez! I might have to change me profile

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We do (and I did when I had a solo profile). In my mind its better to hunt than be hunted.

If guys find their inbox empty and they don't get messages from people they are interested in I would suggest it's because their profile isn't appealing / engaging / of interest to those people

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ladies do message first but they often don’t have to. This is simple arithmetic, the ratio of men to women is reckoned as anything from 25 to 1 up. Therefore women can choose from those that message them or engage by going in chat or the forums for example. They will often then be messaged from that. However women do message, they just don’t do it the way men do. If a woman messages she’s probably thought about it, read the profile and found something genuinely worth her interest. Men tend to message lots of women just hoping for a response (meet) fancy-a-fuck style.

Disclaimer: I’m well aware there are women here who use the site badly and very charming, articulate and intelligent men here, hell I’ve even met a couple of them. There are behaviour patterns though, the above is merely my observation

Oh jeez! I might have to change me profile "

I’ve perved... I mean perused yours, it’s fine, especially the bum pic

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

I will message a profile which I find interesting, or occasionally in response to something someone has said in a forum discussion. A message doesn't automatically mean I'm interested in meeting the person though (which a lot seem to assume it does).

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)"

oh you charmer and men wonder why woman get fed up on this site with guys like you

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *iimonMan
over a year ago

glasgow

6 is more than me but I don't come on enough and chat, leave comments or upload pics. Probably find the more active you are on here the more you will get noticed.

Just my opinion. Have a great day everyone

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *adbury girlWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)"

Yet your profile doesn’t state your preference, is that cause your ego needs a boost from all the messages you receive so you’re happy to receive a message from a fatty you just wouldn’t actually go near them?

Block option comes in handy when using forums

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *indfkdWoman
over a year ago

glasgow


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)"

really?

We all have preferences, maybe you should put on your profile, you dont like fat birds

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *assy LassieWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)

Yet your profile doesn’t state your preference, is that cause your ego needs a boost from all the messages you receive so you’re happy to receive a message from a fatty you just wouldn’t actually go near them?

Block option comes in handy when using forums "

Fat birds are no use if you have a small cock......

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By *ugyukMan
over a year ago

dundee


"If so many men wernt so shit to the ladies s nice guys would have a better shot

Nice guys will do just fine if they conduct themselves as such, in the same way as nice females do. The problematic in both genders don't."

So..........whits ma excuse then??

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)

Awww the fatties don't fancy you anyway so I wouldn't worry your head about it "

lol

touchy

sometimes there is more fun in reading these messages than an actual meet

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think I’ve every had a lady message me, I’ve messaged but never seem to get any where so I stopped messaging them, I’ve never had great chat so that’s prob why I don’t get replies

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 

By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That’s got to be a world record!?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
 
 

By *irth VaderMan
over a year ago

Busby


"Ive received approx 15 messages from ladies since joining and 6 are very attractive and not obese (unlike many on here)"

See when you’ve finished with the ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’ book can I borrow it? Have you even read it?

Reply privatelyReply in forumReply +quote
Post new Message to Thread
back to top