FabSwingers.com forum: Messaging etiquette

By *attooed Rob OP Man
over a year ago

Hornchurch

Just wondering what most people’s approach is to sending a follow up message if you didn’t get a reply first time around?

Obviously if you’re message is deleted then that’s a clear sign. However conscious that some go unread or have too many to get through.

Thanks

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By *ee04Man
over a year ago

Thurrock

Don’t let them contact you if they’re interested they will, if not move on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If your first message was no reply or deleted.. Surely your wise enough not to send a 2nd..

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By *ulahlollipopWoman
over a year ago

Reading/London

I wouldn’t be shy about sending one follow up message as often the messages get so many and overwhelming that you get a bit numb to it all.

Just don’t send “so I’m not your type then?” Or something like that- it feels a bit passive aggressive and is definitely a turn off

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

OP. as harsh as it sounds - if there's no reply, then it's a no.

Sending more isn't a good idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I find repeat messages sent to me annoying, if they spam messages to me all day, I end up blocking them, but a second message 99.9% of the time will be ignored, quite cutthroat on here for a guy I would of thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You don't. If they haven't responded to your first message, a second will most likely earn you a block at the very least. A non reply on fab, as stated in site FAQ's constitutes a 'no thank you'

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally don't mind a second message.However if it's a second message within a short space of time, or 3 and 4 messages I block

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By *wholeLotOfRosieWoman
over a year ago

Pontypridd

"OP. as harsh as it sounds - if there's no reply, then it's a no.

Sending more isn't a good idea. "

Not always. If I have a lot of messages I might be intending to respond to but the message gets lost in history. I delete when I have no intention of responding, but keep it read if I am looking to chat.

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By *nlyIfItsWorthItMan
over a year ago

Newcastle

Just move on. Their lack of reply (even just a courteous no) only fuels guys who send copy and paste messages.

Block them if you want so they don't appear in your searches anymore bit apart from that, just don't be a pest.

Plenty more fish amd sausage in the chip shop

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"OP. as harsh as it sounds - if there's no reply, then it's a no.

Sending more isn't a good idea.

I've had friends say mine get lost in the mass of messages they get, so get your meaning.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I personally don't mind a second message.However if it's a second message within a short space of time, or 3 and 4 messages I block"

This

I don't mind a second message that acknowledges the fact they've already mailed but are just hoping I missed it. Any more than that or any hint of desperation and I block.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I personally don't mind a second message.However if it's a second message within a short space of time, or 3 and 4 messages I block

This

I don't mind a second message that acknowledges the fact they've already mailed but are just hoping I missed it. Any more than that or any hint of desperation and I block. "

The difference between admiration and desperation.

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By *wholeLotOfRosieWoman
over a year ago

Pontypridd

"OP. as harsh as it sounds - if there's no reply, then it's a no.

Sending more isn't a good idea.

I've had friends say mine get lost in the mass of messages they get, so get your meaning. "

To give it context I once got 200 messages in one night. Most were garbage but that leaves dozens of decent messages from great guys. I have to shut messaging down to catch up sometimes (like now). And I'm nothing special - I can't imagine how the popular ladies begin to cope!

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By *ee04Man
over a year ago

Thurrock

"OP. as harsh as it sounds - if there's no reply, then it's a no.

Sending more isn't a good idea.

I've had friends say mine get lost in the mass of messages they get, so get your meaning.

Don’t think I’ve had 200 messages in the time I’ve been on here

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We had over 1200 views one day last week, we read all messages but don't reply to ones of no interest, so we see it as a polite no by not responding.

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

We personally wouldn't object to a follow-up message after three months if you simply didn't hear back from us, unless the messages are just shit.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham, North Yorkshire and can travel

If we sent a message but we didn't receive a reply, we would take it that they aren't interested. We wouldn't send a second message.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In the past...I have ignored messages then after a while bored ended up responding and meeting & having a great fucking time. But that has been a one off as such. I'm not saying pester, that's a no no. But we do get bombarded & sometimes I suppose some of us can be a little spontaneous & pick a lucky fucker & think fuck it.

Have no shame.

You can always be blocked.

Nothing to lose right...

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By *eachesAndCream99Couple
over a year ago

Outskirts of Cardiff just off the M4

"I personally don't mind a second message.However if it's a second message within a short space of time, or 3 and 4 messages I block"

We are with you on this one, we don’t mind a second one as long as it’s not template written or being passive aggressive as sometimes we get overwhelmed with messages but also as a couple, it is nice if we are both addressed as our profile says we will only play together and are a couple not a single lady

The Mrs

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

The general fab rule is that no reply means no interest atm or ever.

The main rule is to always respect others and not giving them potential inbox overload could be 100% that.

Spread effort broadly to many and leave a longer break before you think about any further contact. It's better to move on and create many choices

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By *atricia ParnelWoman
over a year ago

In a town full of colours

Maybe try again in a couple of days, sometimes life gets too busy to start up new conversations

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