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I fucked my mates ex Have I fucked up??

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

"

Majorly!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah, friendship is all about sharing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Obviously!!

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By *nvisible_beardMan
over a year ago

near newbridge, wales

Ditch the friend

Fuck the bird more

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes pal...yes you have!

But only of you get found out!

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By *iker boy 69Man
over a year ago

midlands

I did it a few years back. They are still best mates, but id go visiting when they were together and chat more to her, so when they split it was inevitable something woukd happen. Saw her a few times, and still see her now, but nothing happens anymore

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Only if he’s said to you “fuck my lass Dave and i’ll rip your cock off and feed it to my cat”...

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By *abat40xWoman
over a year ago

North Lincolnshire

Don't you boys have boy code??

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would say you fucked up, royally. For me that's a line I would never cross, I value my friendships immensely and I wouldn't want to jeopardise them by getting involved with their exes or family members

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m shocked that you’re 36 years of age and have to even ask that.

‘Friend’.... yeah

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By *irm hand LukeMan
over a year ago

Berkshire/West Oxfordshire

No easy answer really. That doesn't help, I'm aware of that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeah. You’re a shit friend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

"
if your mate knows you might have

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By *olgateMan
over a year ago

on the road to nowhere in particular


"Don't you boys have boy code?? "

Boys code goes out the window when the little head gets involved

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Boy code with this fella went out the window years ago. He’s never been one for it and has kinda done me in the past with it. But this girl I really like.... which is even worse right!?

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington


"Boy code with this fella went out the window years ago. He’s never been one for it and has kinda done me in the past with it. But this girl I really like.... which is even worse right!? "
sounds like the pair of yous don’t have any morals

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Boy code with this fella went out the window years ago. He’s never been one for it and has kinda done me in the past with it. But this girl I really like.... which is even worse right!? sounds like the pair of yous don’t have any morals "

And their not as close friends as he thought

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

Well I think it depends on a number of factors

How good is your friendship?

Why did they split up?

Was he cut up about it?

Did he ..

Oh fuck it ... who am I trying to kid, yup... fucked up ... the code man!!! The code!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Well I think it depends on a number of factors

How good is your friendship?

Why did they split up?

Was he cut up about it?

Did he ..

Oh fuck it ... who am I trying to kid, yup... fucked up ... the code man!!! The code!!!! "

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

"
No shes his ex so no reason why you cant have a friendship/ relationship with her now

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By *musedforlifeMan
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"Boy code with this fella went out the window years ago. He’s never been one for it and has kinda done me in the past with it. But this girl I really like.... which is even worse right!? "

Kinda done you in the past - please explain so we can compare both situations.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro


"I’m shocked that you’re 36 years of age and have to even ask that.

‘Friend’.... yeah "

Oh la la now that made me laugh more than it should have..

Fuck a bird in a bush, I give up..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

depends how long they were together, sounds like she was fair game. I would of

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

No shes his ex so no reason why you cant have a friendship/ relationship with her now "
well why doesn’t op tell his mate ? Because he knows it’s wrong especially when it’s only been a few months since the split it’s a bit shady especially if they are mates

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

Bird!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What do you think OP

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Franky, like a lot of things in life it's only a problem if you get caught.

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

They’re not together so what’s the problem?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't you boys have boy code?? "

No

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By *essie.Woman
over a year ago

Serendipity

I must have really messed with the code then, my ex hubby was really good friends with my bf of a few years. They weren’t friends though once we got together, but he’d asked my ex hubby to look after me. He just did it too well.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sorry they split up 8-9 months ago. That’s my bad... and they weren’t together very long. And we’re not close friends. I know I’m trying to make it sound better but it is what it is right?

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By *hedevilKTWoman
over a year ago

milton keynes

Depends on how close a friend you was and I would say yes that’s a big no no

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

You fucked after they had split up?

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By *acavityMan
over a year ago

Redditch

The bro code.

You should have asked if it was okay.

He should have said okay, unless he was really upset.

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

They split up: you're free agents. Personally, friends exes are up there with in-laws: no!

Other opinions are available.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"You fucked after they had split up?"

Yeah recently....

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham


"You fucked after they had split up?

Yeah recently.... "

You should of maybe ran it by your mate, dependant upon how close you are.

People have done much worse though so we wouldn't worry yourself too much.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you have to ask then you know the answer

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By *he Little Fuck MachineMan
over a year ago

Co.Antrim

Of course you fucked up. Regardless of how long ago they split up and even if my mate was in a new relationship it’s still a line I couldn’t and wouldn’t cross. A mate’s Ex is off limits, I thought that was just common sense.

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By *awty_MissDynomiteNo1Woman
over a year ago

No idea, I'm lost. Damn Sat nav!


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

No shes his ex so no reason why you cant have a friendship/ relationship with her now well why doesn’t op tell his mate ? Because he knows it’s wrong especially when it’s only been a few months since the split it’s a bit shady especially if they are mates "
perhaps because its no ones business other than his & the females.

Im sure if its going to be a regular thing or turn into a relationship then he can choose whether he wants to tell his friend or not.

if its only going to be a one off thing then no one needs to know

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

I thought words like "bird" were obsolete

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Yeah. You’re a shit friend "

This.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham


"Of course you fucked up. Regardless of how long ago they split up and even if my mate was in a new relationship it’s still a line I couldn’t and wouldn’t cross. A mate’s Ex is off limits, I thought that was just common sense."

Depends on circumstances. Some people will be absoloutely fine about their mate going with their ex. We have friends like this and one couple are now married and his mate was their best man at their wedding. Each individual is different. No set rules in life.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't you boys have boy code?? "

Yea its like rule 2 of the bro code

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't you boys have boy code??

Yea its like rule 2 of the bro code"

I feel like I might regret asking this. What’s rule 1...?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Men don't own women or female family members, who their exes choose to date or have sex with is not their business. I can't believe that in 2020 people are suggesting that a man should ask another man's permission to have sex with a woman

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By *he Little Fuck MachineMan
over a year ago

Co.Antrim


"Of course you fucked up. Regardless of how long ago they split up and even if my mate was in a new relationship it’s still a line I couldn’t and wouldn’t cross. A mate’s Ex is off limits, I thought that was just common sense.

Depends on circumstances. Some people will be absoloutely fine about their mate going with their ex. We have friends like this and one couple are now married and his mate was their best man at their wedding. Each individual is different. No set rules in life."

Absolutely and I respect and understand than not every scenario/situation is the same. I guess that’s just my personal opinion which obviously isn’t right or wrong as there are often many variables but it’s just something I wouldn’t do as I think it crosses a line.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Don't you boys have boy code??

Yea its like rule 2 of the bro code

I feel like I might regret asking this. What’s rule 1...?"

Dont sleep with a mates current girlfriend

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you value your mate less than dipping your dick then your fine. Personally my mates friendships are not worth jeopardising for a fuck but don’t know the intricacies.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What's boy code? All I know is bro code

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By *abasaurus RexMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire

Yes, you did. But only because you’ve done it so recently imo.

If he’d genuinely moved on into another relationship then for me, it would be ok.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sharing is Caring - I thought!

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By *imbo jimboMan
over a year ago

tyldesley

Not in my opinion mate. She’s fair game but maybe tell him if u get serious.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Live with no regrets

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought words like "bird" were obsolete "

Yeah I know, that bugged me more than him doing his mates ex

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sharing is caring

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time "

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Now I wonder why I don't meet n my profiles arsey...

And have 400+ blocked

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

100% not fucking right. Hope he has some bollocks and tells his mate before he finds out another way and kicks the shit of of him. Either way your getting at least a punch

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

You define your own moral code and the importance, or otherwise, of significant people to you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs? "

It's the business of his friend as friends should be there for each other not be there for there own gain.Next he will be piecing together his friends discarded bank statements out of the bin.Its just morally wrong and if you can't see that then you obviously think anything is fair game with regards to loyalty and friendship

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By *elly72Woman
over a year ago

glasgow

No. It’s his ex so none of his business

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you feel it would hurt your friend then yes, you fucked up.

If your mate wouldn't be fussed by it then no, you haven't fucked up.

However... if you could see yourself having a serious relationship with said bird, then that may just be something your friend will need to see past to maintain your friendship, as your happiness should matter to them.

It's one of those sit down and talk things, if you're serious about the lady and your friend and want them both to remain in your life.

Who knows, he could find out and say "she's an alright shag ain't she bruv" or he could clock you square on the nose if he feels you crossed the line, especially if he still has feelings for her.

P

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I personally haven't & wouldn't have sex with anyone my friends been with. My friends & even sister however have been with people I've been with.

We all have different rules. Your own can't be dictated for everyone else to abide by.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs?

It's the business of his friend as friends should be there for each other not be there for there own gain.Next he will be piecing together his friends discarded bank statements out of the bin.Its just morally wrong and if you can't see that then you obviously think anything is fair game with regards to loyalty and friendship "

That's a bit of a jump to make both on my attitude to loyalty and friendship and piecing together bank statements

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs?

It's the business of his friend as friends should be there for each other not be there for there own gain.Next he will be piecing together his friends discarded bank statements out of the bin.Its just morally wrong and if you can't see that then you obviously think anything is fair game with regards to loyalty and friendship

That's a bit of a jump to make both on my attitude to loyalty and friendship and piecing together bank statements"

Well you clearly have no limits on friendship and loyalty so nothing would shock a friend If you treat them that way.Im surprised you even needed to ask if you've done wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

On fab, for some, sharing is caring. Outside fab, depending if he’s your best buddy, being a good or close friend you turn to, then the friendship should be your priority, otherwise that friendship doesn’t mean that much to you. My best friend means everything to me, I value our friendship more than a fuck with a guy she’s been with regardless of ‘how long’. If I really liked him... I need her in my life more.

Being honest... the mere fact you posted asking gives you the answer you don’t want. Or your looking for validation, which you also potentially already know you won’t get. Never been in your situation (thank gawd, but also wouldn’t consider going there).

As for others comments ‘she’s fair game’... that’s another story!

No disrespect intended. Each to their own and that’s my tuppence worth

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs?

It's the business of his friend as friends should be there for each other not be there for there own gain.Next he will be piecing together his friends discarded bank statements out of the bin.Its just morally wrong and if you can't see that then you obviously think anything is fair game with regards to loyalty and friendship

That's a bit of a jump to make both on my attitude to loyalty and friendship and piecing together bank statements

Well you clearly have no limits on friendship and loyalty so nothing would shock a friend If you treat them that way.Im surprised you even needed to ask if you've done wrong "

I think you are misunderstanding my question to you which was designed to provoke discussion not comments on my qualities of loyalty as a friend.

I think it best we leave it here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs?

It's the business of his friend as friends should be there for each other not be there for there own gain.Next he will be piecing together his friends discarded bank statements out of the bin.Its just morally wrong and if you can't see that then you obviously think anything is fair game with regards to loyalty and friendship

That's a bit of a jump to make both on my attitude to loyalty and friendship and piecing together bank statements

Well you clearly have no limits on friendship and loyalty so nothing would shock a friend If you treat them that way.Im surprised you even needed to ask if you've done wrong

I think you are misunderstanding my question to you which was designed to provoke discussion not comments on my qualities of loyalty as a friend.

I think it best we leave it here."

I didn't misunderstand your question.You asked if you had messed up.My opinion and I think anyone else that has morals and loyalty to friends would say you've crossed the line big time.So my answer is yes you've messed up

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs?

It's the business of his friend as friends should be there for each other not be there for there own gain.Next he will be piecing together his friends discarded bank statements out of the bin.Its just morally wrong and if you can't see that then you obviously think anything is fair game with regards to loyalty and friendship

That's a bit of a jump to make both on my attitude to loyalty and friendship and piecing together bank statements

Well you clearly have no limits on friendship and loyalty so nothing would shock a friend If you treat them that way.Im surprised you even needed to ask if you've done wrong

I think you are misunderstanding my question to you which was designed to provoke discussion not comments on my qualities of loyalty as a friend.

I think it best we leave it here.

I didn't misunderstand your question.You asked if you had messed up.My opinion and I think anyone else that has morals and loyalty to friends would say you've crossed the line big time.So my answer is yes you've messed up "
I

I am not the person who started the thread, if you go to the top of the page you will see that.

As I said, I think we should leave it here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Friends like you aren't friends.Theres unwritten rules in friendships and you crossed one big time

Why? Genuine question, why is a man having consensual sex with a woman anyone's business but theirs?

It's the business of his friend as friends should be there for each other not be there for there own gain.Next he will be piecing together his friends discarded bank statements out of the bin.Its just morally wrong and if you can't see that then you obviously think anything is fair game with regards to loyalty and friendship

That's a bit of a jump to make both on my attitude to loyalty and friendship and piecing together bank statements

Well you clearly have no limits on friendship and loyalty so nothing would shock a friend If you treat them that way.Im surprised you even needed to ask if you've done wrong

I think you are misunderstanding my question to you which was designed to provoke discussion not comments on my qualities of loyalty as a friend.

I think it best we leave it here.

I didn't misunderstand your question.You asked if you had messed up.My opinion and I think anyone else that has morals and loyalty to friends would say you've crossed the line big time.So my answer is yes you've messed up I

I am not the person who started the thread, if you go to the top of the page you will see that.

As I said, I think we should leave it here."

Sorry lol

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By *teveanddebsCouple
over a year ago

Norwich

Question to all the ladies saying no you shouldn't, you're a bad friend or whatever.

Would you be happy that an ex had control of your sex life and could veto people?

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By *ltra72Man
over a year ago

edinburgh

Good point. Everyone’s got needs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i have when i was young but my friend/s knew

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

"

Ask your mate.

Mrs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You are a good friend

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

Is her name "Up" ?? X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

up, down in or out it'll be one of them

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By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish

Do you think it is wrong OP? She is his ex, so maybe you should be asking why you can't be honest with your friend, in a mature way. This sounds like you getting revenge on your friend for unresolved issues. You both sound like shit friends.

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury


"Do you think it is wrong OP? She is his ex, so maybe you should be asking why you can't be honest with your friend, in a mature way. This sounds like you getting revenge on your friend for unresolved issues. You both sound like shit friends.

"

This is why I have 3 friends and all of them are women.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Only if he’s said to you “fuck my lass Dave and i’ll rip your cock off and feed it to my cat”...

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, you're single, she's single, he's single. I don't see why it would be any of his business.

Oh, and "bird", really?

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By *ild_oatsMan
over a year ago

the land of saints & sinners

Did you fuck her in the arse and your mate did not ?

Rule #11 of boy code broken

Punishment is you now have to suck your mates cock....

It’s all in the rules....

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By *razytimesinloveCouple
over a year ago

SW Scotland

When you say last year, do you mean Dec as that’s cutting it a bit fine.

If they split up start of last year I wouldn’t be concerned too much. Best to let him know from you as well.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

She's an ex, can't see the problem. Mind you, it's probably why I don't have any mates....

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

I think it’s morally wrong, but if they have split she’s free it’s her choice..

Was she good???

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By *iddlesticksMan
over a year ago

My nan’s spare room.


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

"

Only by starting the sentence with so, which wasn’t required and the superfluous ? at the end. Other than those I’d say you’ve done nothing wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

"

They’d already split up, don’t see a problem. Put the boot on the other foot, what if he’d got it on with your ex.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Question to all the ladies saying no you shouldn't, you're a bad friend or whatever.

Would you be happy that an ex had control of your sex life and could veto people?"

This is my point.

I honestly don't think anything has changed since 1520 where men's feelings of ownership towards women and their sex life is concerned.

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro


"Question to all the ladies saying no you shouldn't, you're a bad friend or whatever.

Would you be happy that an ex had control of your sex life and could veto people?

This is my point.

I honestly don't think anything has changed since 1520 where men's feelings of ownership towards women and their sex life is concerned."

In my opinion its not about the women involved or owning her sex life more to do with respecting your friend. Treating others how you would like to be treated.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It used to happen quite often amongst my mates at school, Uni and work. I never had a problem with one my mates getting together with one of my exes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Done it on Friday, felt fine about it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she was an ex no nothing wrong.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Question to all the ladies saying no you shouldn't, you're a bad friend or whatever.

Would you be happy that an ex had control of your sex life and could veto people?

This is my point.

I honestly don't think anything has changed since 1520 where men's feelings of ownership towards women and their sex life is concerned.

In my opinion its not about the women involved or owning her sex life more to do with respecting your friend. Treating others how you would like to be treated. "
he's lost touch with his friend he's in the navy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Some real hyperbole in here. So he's not a close friend, they were together five minutes and they split 8 months ago. It's not really an issue. Fill your boots IMO

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some real hyperbole in here. So he's not a close friend, they were together five minutes and they split 8 months ago. It's not really an issue. Fill your boots IMO"
yes fill your boots

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

if he marries her that negates moral obligation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Some real hyperbole in here. So he's not a close friend, they were together five minutes and they split 8 months ago. It's not really an issue. Fill your boots IMO"

Chances are in local areas or friend groups everyone will know someone that shagged/dated someone else, we would never be allowed to meet anyone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So I’ve always had this thing for this bird. Even before he got with her. But they split up late last year and i got real close with her. We fucked!! Have I messed up here or what??

"
nahh! She's a free agent, not cheating at all

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By *pider-WomanWoman
over a year ago

Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth, Truro

[Removed by poster at 11/03/20 12:10:17]

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Question to all the ladies saying no you shouldn't, you're a bad friend or whatever.

Would you be happy that an ex had control of your sex life and could veto people?

This is my point.

I honestly don't think anything has changed since 1520 where men's feelings of ownership towards women and their sex life is concerned.

In my opinion its not about the women involved or owning her sex life more to do with respecting your friend. Treating others how you would like to be treated. "

I genuinely wouldn't mind if a friend of mine had sex with an ex partner. I might be a bit if Mr N and I split up and my best friend went on to have sex with him but I still wouldn't think it was any of my business or disrespectful to me in any way.

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