FabSwingers.com forum: Must be getting old

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

But she was 20 years old.

I am 40, and I just couldn't bring myself to want to take it any further because of her age.

Most men I imagine jump at the chance of a young, attractive female, but I just felt a bit creepy, so stopped chatting.

Am I insane?

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

Not being rude but are you 100% sure it was a 20yr old female?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not being rude but are you 100% sure it was a 20yr old female?"

She was definitely female, and she said she was 20, she looks around that age, but can I say I know for sure? No, people lie dont they.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Were you chatting to her on cam or by message ?

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

"Not being rude but are you 100% sure it was a 20yr old female?

She was definitely female, and she said she was 20, she looks around that age, but can I say I know for sure? No, people lie dont they. "

The only way you would know if she was definately female would to meet her face to face over a drink.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Were you chatting to her on cam or by message ?"

A little on messages, then some snap chat.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I do the same, too close to my own kids age!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Not being rude but are you 100% sure it was a 20yr old female?

She was definitely female, and she said she was 20, she looks around that age, but can I say I know for sure? No, people lie dont they.

The only way you would know if she was definately female would to meet her face to face over a drink."

It wasnt on here. It was a dating app.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’m with you there that’s what the filters for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its not just you.

Im 35 i couldnt go for a 20 year old. Ive had a 19 year old on here that local wanting to meet, shes a nice girl but she just looks too young.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

No, if it felt creepy to you then you did the right thing in stopping talking to her, rather than leading her on.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Plenty of "girls" turn out to be blokes after a pic to wank over! Beats me!!

You think you're old, at 54 i've been called a coffin dodger!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’m with you there that’s what the filters for "

I usually set mine to 18-54 or something as usually women under 30 dont speak to me anyway

Again though it wasnt on here, it was on a dating app then snap chat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

But she was 20 years old.

I am 40, and I just couldn't bring myself to want to take it any further because of her age.

Most men I imagine jump at the chance of a young, attractive female, but I just felt a bit creepy, so stopped chatting.

Am I insane?"

Not insane. We all have an age limit for similar reasons. As much as I look at a younger guy and think “wow he is stunning” I am very unlikely to take it further as it doesn’t sit well with me.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Its not just you.

Im 35 i couldnt go for a 20 year old. Ive had a 19 year old on here that local wanting to meet, shes a nice girl but she just looks too young."

Same. I get messages off younger men all the time and I just feel like I’m their mother. Anything under 30 (and even that is pushing it) is just a no go for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I (her) had a FB when I was 40 and he was 20. He was incredibly experienced from older female lovers and was very mature for his age. We played for years together until I started my relationship.

It's up to you OP if the age gap made you feel awkward then you did the right thing by breaking contact.

Would I do it again, quite possibly not because I now find myself attracted to men in their late 30's, 40's and 50's. Our preferences change over time and that's ok too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Its down to personal preference she's over 18 WO its down to you and her but personally I'm 39 and I'd not go with a 20 year old I prefer ladies a bit more mature

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

If someone is close in age to my daughter then it starts to feel a bit icky to me.

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

I got with a guy who lied about his age. I'm 42.he was actually 22. He was one of the most experienced and exciting lovers I ever had. It really changed my perception about younger men. Thinking they be too immature and inexperienced. I also have another guy who I enjoy chatting to, he's 21 and is the most politest and sweetest guy i chatted to for ages. So age is definitely a number. Them men put other men to shame. So maybe think more about the connection etc than age

But she was 20 years old.

I am 40, and I just couldn't bring myself to want to take it any further because of her age.

Most men I imagine jump at the chance of a young, attractive female, but I just felt a bit creepy, so stopped chatting.

Am I insane?"

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By *eavenscentitCouple
over a year ago

barnstaple

For me (female) I don't meet guys under 35 and that's pushing it. It feels odd and my eldest is 31 now.

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By *entleman JayMan
over a year ago

Wakefield

No I would be the same. Have you ever spent time in the company of that age group? I’ve nothing in common with them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No I would be the same. Have you ever spent time in the company of that age group? I’ve nothing in common with them. "

I always say

I am 40 but I feel like I'm 20. Until I hng around 20 year olds, and then I realise I am definitely 40

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By *inky_couple2020Couple
over a year ago

North West

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

But she was 20 years old.

I am 40, and I just couldn't bring myself to want to take it any further because of her age.

Most men I imagine jump at the chance of a young, attractive female, but I just felt a bit creepy, so stopped chatting.

Am I insane?"

Not insane, that's why our age preference is set as it is. Ten years (ish) above and below is our ages is right for us. We wouldn't want to play with people in our son's peer group (he's 17) nor our parents ages.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nope not insane.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No I would be the same. Have you ever spent time in the company of that age group? I’ve nothing in common with them.

I always say

I am 40 but I feel like I'm 20. Until I hng around 20 year olds, and then I realise I am definitely 40

Thats it i feel early 20s but when im on a night out theres a clear sign im not, i find early 20s so so immature and lacking in life experiences.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Nope not insane. "

Good to know.

Kinda proud of myself too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No I would be the same. Have you ever spent time in the company of that age group? I’ve nothing in common with them.

I always say

I am 40 but I feel like I'm 20. Until I hng around 20 year olds, and then I realise I am definitely 40

Thats it i feel early 20s but when im on a night out theres a clear sign im not, i find early 20s so so immature and lacking in life experiences."

Mostly yes, the same. Some are very mature for their age, but generally I want someone who can at least remember things I do.

I want a woman I can talk shit about old kids tv shows and 80's growing up etc.

I wouldnt have a clue what 20 year olds watched

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

" want a woman I can talk shit about old kids tv shows and 80's growing up etc.

I wouldnt have a clue what 20 year olds watched

Definitely.. im with you on that one!

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

I think it all just depends on the person.

I might feel differently if my kids were boys, but as is, I have met men who are in my kids' age range and had a great time. They were quite unexpected surprises, and it wasn't the age that attracted me, but the man.

I think we should all just meet who we are comfortable with, period.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I think it all just depends on the person.

I think we should all just meet who we are comfortable with, period. "

Of course. But I wasnt and wouldnt be comfortable with her.

Yes, I could be a dick and just use her to get some jollies, but I'm not like that.

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

[Removed by poster at 16/02/20 10:39:32]

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

I would say if she wants to meet talk face to face don't play yet.

Our experiences have taught us a few things one being don't judge someone based on how young or old they are.

We have met plenty of people our own age who have the maturity of a teenage boy!

Yet chatted with guy's in early 20's who have turned out to be very level headed and mature.

Point being it's about the person if you click and get on who gives a shit about age difference as long as it's legal and no one is getting hurt what's the issue?

If she's old enough to make a decision about if she likes you and you like her then why not?

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By *atBottomGirlsWoman
over a year ago

St Austell-ish

"I think it all just depends on the person.

I think we should all just meet who we are comfortable with, period.

Of course. But I wasnt and wouldnt be comfortable with her.

Yes, I could be a dick and just use her to get some jollies, but I'm not like that. "

Which speaks a lot for you.

My point was that the age difference shouldn't be an issue simply because of age. The young men I have met with were not a conquest or anything to prove -- we got on and had a great time.

if it wasn't right for you, it wasn't right for you.

Using someone for sex is completely different.

And to say no simply because you chose not to for whatever reason is well within your right to choose, for whatever reason!

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By *herryblossom_BJWoman
over a year ago

Oxfordshire/Hampshire

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

But she was 20 years old.

I am 40, and I just couldn't bring myself to want to take it any further because of her age.

Most men I imagine jump at the chance of a young, attractive female, but I just felt a bit creepy, so stopped chatting.

Am I insane?"

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By *ydrewMan
over a year ago

forest

Age is definitely just a number. I've got friends of all different ages and it really makes no difference

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Definitely insane

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Because it’s legal doesn’t mean it’s moral. You did the right thing. Can you imagine how bad the conversation would be also.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Age is definitely just a number. I've got friends of all different ages and it really makes no difference "

I have friends all ages too.

Most of my friends are around 7 years younger than me. But sometimes age is a factor. Especially when it comes to dating or sex.

I might be the same age as her mum. That would be weird

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you felt uneasy OP you did the right thing. I’m in my 40’s and would definitely not go with a 20yr old

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

But she was 20 years old.

I am 40, and I just couldn't bring myself to want to take it any further because of her age.

Most men I imagine jump at the chance of a young, attractive female, but I just felt a bit creepy, so stopped chatting.

Am I insane?

Connection is always the main thing, I don't think we had that enough or otherwise i would be bragging of pulling a hot 20 year old.

Plus, 30+ can be sweet and polite too

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By *ools and the brainCouple
over a year ago

couple, us we him her.

"Because it’s legal doesn’t mean it’s moral. You did the right thing. Can you imagine how bad the conversation would be also. "

Would it be immoral for a 40 year old woman to get with a 60year old man?

Look I'm not saying his situation is right or wrong but when you talk about morals where is the line that shouldn't be crossed?

She's 20 so if he's 35 it's ok?

Or 30?

Or he's not allowed to be older than 25?

If he was 20 and she was 40 I guarantee that a few women would be responding with" you go girl"

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My point is assuming she's real surely it's her and his choice to make.

It's a real tricky one for sure but judging someone based purely on age is a bit closed minded.

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

Connection is always the main thing, I don't think we had that enough or otherwise i would be bragging of pulling a hot 20 year old.

But aren't you bragging that an attractive 20 year old found your pics sexy and wanted to meet ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Because it’s legal doesn’t mean it’s moral. You did the right thing. Can you imagine how bad the conversation would be also.

Would it be immoral for a 40 year old woman to get with a 60year old man?

Look I'm not saying his situation is right or wrong but when you talk about morals where is the line that shouldn't be crossed?

She's 20 so if he's 35 it's ok?

Or 30?

Or he's not allowed to be older than 25?

If he was 20 and she was 40 I guarantee that a few women would be responding with" you go girl"

Comments.

My point is assuming she's real surely it's her and his choice to make.

It's a real tricky one for sure but judging someone based purely on age is a bit closed minded."

I think they mean morally wrong as in mentally you are not comfortable rather than actual 20 years difference.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

Connection is always the main thing, I don't think we had that enough or otherwise i would be bragging of pulling a hot 20 year old.

But aren't you bragging that an attractive 20 year old found your pics sexy and wanted to meet ?"

I dont know, am I?

I'm not going to lie it was nice to have some attention, but I wrote this post to see if people thought I was nuts or doing the right thing?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I was seeing someone same age as my dad 65 I'm 32.

Didn't sit well when he talked about 20 odd year olds.

Lesson learnt my age limit is 50 now. I just can't go younger than me never have been able to.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I was seeing someone same age as my dad 65 I'm 32.

Didn't sit well when he talked about 20 odd year olds.

Lesson learnt my age limit is 50 now. I just can't go younger than me never have been able to."

To be honest. My ex was 7 years younger than me and I always thought I preferred younger, but in the last two years being single I have had encounters with numerous older ladies, usually around 45-50 bracket and I am so glad I did.

This obviously has had an effect on my preferences

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Talking to 20 year olds feels like talking to children still. There’s a huge mental leap and can’t look past that no matter how ‘sexy’ they are.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Talking to 20 year olds feels like talking to children still. There’s a huge mental leap and can’t look past that no matter how ‘sexy’ they are. "

This

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I started talking to a lass last night. Very attractive and she very much liked my pics and was very sexual towards me.

Connection is always the main thing, I don't think we had that enough or otherwise i would be bragging of pulling a hot 20 year old.

But aren't you bragging that an attractive 20 year old found your pics sexy and wanted to meet ?

I dont know, am I?

I'm not going to lie it was nice to have some attention, but I wrote this post to see if people thought I was nuts or doing the right thing?

You don’t sound like your bragging OP

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