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Men who cry

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Is it strange that I seem to cry most days when I'm alone but I'm not depressed?

I just get upset about certain things and feel the need to let myself express that emotion rather than bottle it up. Nobody knows I do this and it can range from a couple of tears to a full on sob but I find myself crying most if not all days at some point.

Just thought I'd share this as I'm not ashamed (I do it alone as not to upset those around me) and think it's important to acknowledge that men should be able to discuss this aspect of life, as we rarely do.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Good for you. Everyone should be able to cry, whatever sex/age you are. Crying is releasing emotions that would otherwise be stored in the body. It’s healing

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Good for you. Everyone should be able to cry, whatever sex/age you are. Crying is releasing emotions that would otherwise be stored in the body. It’s healing "

Thank you x

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

I imagine more do than admit it. When times are tough or I hear of a friend going through tough times, I feel a cry building in me. I suppose I feel compelled to stifle it if others are around (and even when on my own for some reason - daft eh?) but there are times when there's nothing I can do to stop the flow. Last time was when I unexpectedly heard a piece of music that was previously played at my best mate's funeral - started crying in front of my employees... thankfully they were fine about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cry regularly too. I have always been sensitive but I have more empathy/for situations and other’s stories now. Sometimes it is due to their pain connecting with mine and sometimes it is simply feeling their joy. I like that I am emotionally expressive and I am certainly happier and more effective than I was..

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By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city

Probably falling hormone levels.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Probably falling hormone levels."

Mine fell a long time ago then.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I think some people cry more easily than others, gender isn't significant.

I don't think people should feel any differently about crying than they do about laughing.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Probably falling hormone levels.

Mine fell a long time ago then."

It is a potential reason. But obviously not the only reason either.

Age and hormones can go hand in hand, especially if the change is sudden. Some people are just naturally more sensitive and in tune with their emotions though so it's not exclusively tied to hormones.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Probably falling hormone levels.

Mine fell a long time ago then.

It is a potential reason. But obviously not the only reason either.

Age and hormones can go hand in hand, especially if the change is sudden. Some people are just naturally more sensitive and in tune with their emotions though so it's not exclusively tied to hormones. "
,

My hormones have practically disappeared and I cry less than when I had the full complement whizzing round.

People express themselves in different ways. Not crying doesn't mean not feeling, crying doesn't mean you're weak.

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By *evil_u_knowMan
over a year ago

city


"Probably falling hormone levels.

Mine fell a long time ago then.

It is a potential reason. But obviously not the only reason either.

Age and hormones can go hand in hand, especially if the change is sudden. Some people are just naturally more sensitive and in tune with their emotions though so it's not exclusively tied to hormones. ,

My hormones have practically disappeared and I cry less than when I had the full complement whizzing round.

People express themselves in different ways. Not crying doesn't mean not feeling, crying doesn't mean you're weak."

Me saying falling hormones wasnt meant to imply anything, all mens hormones fall at some point. And if this is something new it could be a reason for the change. Thats all I meant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 16/02/20 01:11:32]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it strange that I seem to cry most days when I'm alone but I'm not depressed?

I just get upset about certain things and feel the need to let myself express that emotion rather than bottle it up. Nobody knows I do this and it can range from a couple of tears to a full on sob but I find myself crying most if not all days at some point.

Just thought I'd share this as I'm not ashamed (I do it alone as not to upset those around me) and think it's important to acknowledge that men should be able to discuss this aspect of life, as we rarely do. "

Three out of four suicides in the UK are men.

We need to stop telling men

They cannot have feelings

They shouldn't cry

Etc

We also need to stop using phrases like

Man up

What are you a man or a mouse?

etc

Men have feelings. We can be happy, sad, depressed, scared, worried, etc.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Probably falling hormone levels.

Mine fell a long time ago then.

It is a potential reason. But obviously not the only reason either.

Age and hormones can go hand in hand, especially if the change is sudden. Some people are just naturally more sensitive and in tune with their emotions though so it's not exclusively tied to hormones. ,

My hormones have practically disappeared and I cry less than when I had the full complement whizzing round.

People express themselves in different ways. Not crying doesn't mean not feeling, crying doesn't mean you're weak.

Me saying falling hormones wasnt meant to imply anything, all mens hormones fall at some point. And if this is something new it could be a reason for the change. Thats all I meant."

I haven't taken offence, just saying !y experience as a woman whose hormones galloped into the sunset a year or so ago, taking my tears with them

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Good for you. Everyone should be able to cry, whatever sex/age you are. Crying is releasing emotions that would otherwise be stored in the body. It’s healing "

I totally agree with this lady.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yay your human ... it’s when you disregard your emoticons things go wonky ... let it out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Is it strange that I seem to cry most days when I'm alone but I'm not depressed?

I just get upset about certain things and feel the need to let myself express that emotion rather than bottle it up. Nobody knows I do this and it can range from a couple of tears to a full on sob but I find myself crying most if not all days at some point.

Just thought I'd share this as I'm not ashamed (I do it alone as not to upset those around me) and think it's important to acknowledge that men should be able to discuss this aspect of life, as we rarely do. "
mate respect, it's good for a man to cry we bottle up feelings because we have egos and pride but sometimes we need to let loose and have a cry. If you bottle up feelings they will over power you

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By *rAntrobusMan
over a year ago

Nantwich


"Is it strange that I seem to cry most days when I'm alone but I'm not depressed?

I just get upset about certain things and feel the need to let myself express that emotion rather than bottle it up. Nobody knows I do this and it can range from a couple of tears to a full on sob but I find myself crying most if not all days at some point.

Just thought I'd share this as I'm not ashamed (I do it alone as not to upset those around me) and think it's important to acknowledge that men should be able to discuss this aspect of life, as we rarely do.

Three out of four suicides in the UK are men.

We need to stop telling men

They cannot have feelings

They shouldn't cry

Etc

We also need to stop using phrases like

Man up

What are you a man or a mouse?

etc

Men have feelings. We can be happy, sad, depressed, scared, worried, etc."

Unfortunately, men are more likely to die because we always do it in a more violent way which is often less likely to recover from. Women and men are equal in attempts, it's just mens attempts are much more final.

It's always been difficult for men to speak out, and to share their pain. We often keep it bottled up, until it becomes too much and we no longer able to hold back that pain.

As humans, we were designed to deal with things such as stress in small doses; we see a sabertooth and our stress levels would go crazy and we would react in 1 of 3 ways. Fight, Freeze or Flight. Now, we are always on such high levels of stress that our body was never meant to handle.

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By *rAntrobusMan
over a year ago

Nantwich


"Probably falling hormone levels."

Testosterone in males is linked to our emotional state, but it also is linked to the reason we are more likely to die from suicide attempts.

Taking testosterone boosters, can actually greatly increase a man's mental health as well as taking B vitamins (both genders). Depression can actually be linked to vitamin B deficiency.

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

I've cried a number of times this year all very positive . For me it was the result of the endocrine system working well x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I only have tears when watching a moving movies in a stable seat.

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Really happy to see people opening up about this and that we all seem to experience life the same way.

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By *unloversCouple
over a year ago

rotherham

Good on ya

Nothing wrong with a man letting out his emotions whether alone or not

Everyone has that moment

Some more than others

Nothing to be ashamed of

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

You can do something about your hormones mate. I take testosterone and it really makes me feel good.

Coupled now with a balanced diet and exercise. I have banished some darkness.

There is no normal in my opinion so if crying is who you are then go for it.

Sadly I bottle everything up emotionally probably due to my past.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's a release of emotion and completely natural.

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham


"Is it strange that I seem to cry most days when I'm alone but I'm not depressed?

I just get upset about certain things and feel the need to let myself express that emotion rather than bottle it up. Nobody knows I do this and it can range from a couple of tears to a full on sob but I find myself crying most if not all days at some point.

Just thought I'd share this as I'm not ashamed (I do it alone as not to upset those around me) and think it's important to acknowledge that men should be able to discuss this aspect of life, as we rarely do. "

I cried watching a dogs way home recently on a flight, the bit at the end where he was re united. I had to consoled by a gorgeous flight attendant, truly traumatic experience

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with crying OP, you say in your op you're not depressed so it's just a healthy thing to do. I wish there wasn't a stigma around men expressing how they really feel (I know not all men want to cry and that's okay too!). I like it when men are open with who they are and how they feel.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Not ashamed to admit I'm a serial blubber - the silliest of things can set me off - memory jogs, films, TV programmes, seeing something I associate with a family member, there really is no rhyme nor reason behind it - it just is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have all broke down at some point... twice this year I've shed a wee tear or two. Nothing to worry about. It's just an emotion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Found this on Google (so must be true)

Research has found that in addition to being self-soothing, shedding emotional tears releases oxytocin and endorphins. These chemicals make people feel good and may also ease both physical and emotional pain. In this way, crying can help reduce pain and promote a sense of well-being.

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

Some great replies.

The ones involving animals bring a smile to my face, maybe because I can connect with our animal Friends in a way above and beyond connections restricted to human words.

Start working in dementia care tomorrow - wish me luck

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I think if there wasn't the stigma associated with men crying, we'd find that it's something some people do more than others regardless of gender. Maybe akin to laughing, in a group of people you have the ones to smirk but don't laugh to the ones who laugh so hard it's hilarious.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

You put a question mark after saying that you weren’t depressed OP.

Your crying may be related to depression if you:

- cry over small things or have trouble identifying why you’re crying

- cry much more than normal

- have trouble stopping your tears

If you are worried about it see your GP.

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By *ookMan
over a year ago

london

I went to a funeral of a person a friends dad the other day... had only met him once. Sat in service listening and found myself crying proper big snobby tears As a big Fella I was so embarrassed but realised afterwards that it was all about my own dad and the emotions of losing him from 35 years ago. I felt much better afterwards. A release of emotion can hit you anytime and be triggered by the strangest things.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Probably falling hormone levels."

Good to see you know we’re in the twenty first century. Crying is a normal reaction that allows all of us to express and deal with emotions. I pity the men who have been brainwashed into thinking it’s a reflection of their masculinity. I also pity the men who feel they are required to justify this perfectly normal human response mechanism...

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By *ydrewMan
over a year ago

forest

Ive been crying a lot recently. Tend to wait till I'm alone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Showing emotions amongst men seems to be a taboo crying is an emotion its OK to show it men should feel able to express themselves

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"I went to a funeral of a person a friends dad the other day... had only met him once. Sat in service listening and found myself crying proper big snobby tears As a big Fella I was so embarrassed but realised afterwards that it was all about my own dad and the emotions of losing him from 35 years ago. I felt much better afterwards. A release of emotion can hit you anytime and be triggered by the strangest things."

The worst ones are the surprise songs in busy shops that can trigger things. A song last heard at a funeral or one I associate with a deceased pet can be debilitating if they suddenly come on unexpectedly and I haven't thought of them in some time.

They're often not even sad songs but I still can't say even tell people which songs they are as just saying the song title starts me off. Sometimes they can be the daftest songs too.

The Land of Make Believe by Bucks Fizz was the last one that got me while I was out on an 80s themed night in town. (Just typing that got to me) it was the song I use to sing to by beloved basset hound that I suddenly lost last year to illness. He had been abused before I got him as a rescue dog and was so nervous about anything but when I sang softly to him he would fall asleep in my arms.

I think I might be depressed - I really don't know anymore.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land


"I went to a funeral of a person a friends dad the other day... had only met him once. Sat in service listening and found myself crying proper big snobby tears As a big Fella I was so embarrassed but realised afterwards that it was all about my own dad and the emotions of losing him from 35 years ago. I felt much better afterwards. A release of emotion can hit you anytime and be triggered by the strangest things.

The worst ones are the surprise songs in busy shops that can trigger things. A song last heard at a funeral or one I associate with a deceased pet can be debilitating if they suddenly come on unexpectedly and I haven't thought of them in some time.

They're often not even sad songs but I still can't say even tell people which songs they are as just saying the song title starts me off. Sometimes they can be the daftest songs too.

The Land of Make Believe by Bucks Fizz was the last one that got me while I was out on an 80s themed night in town. (Just typing that got to me) it was the song I use to sing to by beloved basset hound that I suddenly lost last year to illness. He had been abused before I got him as a rescue dog and was so nervous about anything but when I sang softly to him he would fall asleep in my arms.

I think I might be depressed - I really don't know anymore."

If you think you may be depressed go seek help. It'll be the best thing you can do for yourself

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds


"Is it strange that I seem to cry most days when I'm alone but I'm not depressed?

I just get upset about certain things and feel the need to let myself express that emotion rather than bottle it up. Nobody knows I do this and it can range from a couple of tears to a full on sob but I find myself crying most if not all days at some point.

Just thought I'd share this as I'm not ashamed (I do it alone as not to upset those around me) and think it's important to acknowledge that men should be able to discuss this aspect of life, as we rarely do. "

OP let it out.

Also talk to people which will help.

Big hugs xx

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By *ogostick72Man
over a year ago

Scotland

Last time I proper cried was the other day after having to put my cat of 11yrs to sleep

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"Last time I proper cried was the other day after having to put my cat of 11yrs to sleep"

The grief animal loss causes can be so powerful. I think it's because we share our emotions with them so honestly and openly through their lives that the grief is a lot more accessible for us when they die. Its raw and unfiltered.

Big hugs x

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By * Sophie xTV/TS
over a year ago

Derby

The worst thing about crying for anyone is thinking it's a bad thing or even shows weakness.

This is soooooo wrong!

Crying is a way of healing, a release of emotions that allow you to move on.

Mornings a recent loss of any kind of just a few tears for something that has made you happy.

If you want to cry, then cry.

It doesnt matter what your gender is.

It helps you deal with things your own way and it's good for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The end of Terminator 2 gets me every time.

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle


"The worst thing about crying for anyone is thinking it's a bad thing or even shows weakness.

This is soooooo wrong!

Crying is a way of healing, a release of emotions that allow you to move on.

Mornings a recent loss of any kind of just a few tears for something that has made you happy.

If you want to cry, then cry.

It doesnt matter what your gender is.

It helps you deal with things your own way and it's good for you. "

I still hide it from my loved ones as they will no doubt worry and probably more than they should. Us humans are good at imagining the worst and I would never want to burden them unnecessarily.

Need to know basis, especially where the kids are concerned (they're fully grown now but they're still my no.1 priority)

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

It's ok to cry.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Honestly cant remember the last time i cried... Or shed a tear. Just never even enters my head to.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I haven't stopped since I saw Old Yeller.

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By *nlyIfItsWorthIt OP   Man
over a year ago

Newcastle

New tablet from doctors, feeling less upset. Don't know if I like it though.

Might try watching Watership Down later and maybe the original Annie after that to see if they really work.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If crying wasn't a normal, biological process, then it wouldn't happen as an uncontrolled response. The process that isn't normal is to block crying because doing so prevents someone from experiencing a natural response and having an emotional release. The alternative is to suppress feelings by not addressing or blocking them, but unresolved emotional or psychological issues can be released in other forms (e.g., use of alcohol/drugs, a mental breakdown, abusive behavior, or even worse death/suicide).

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