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Fuck Valentines

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm in, all day alls I've heard is love stories n valentines bull shit I've got a head ache.... roll on tomorrow

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’d love a pint...of vodka.

Unfortunately I’m at work for another 3 hours and back at 8 tomorrow so no alcohol for me

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By *eplicant JoWoman
over a year ago

Sussex countryside

I will take a fuck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint? "

Yes please!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm in, all day alls I've heard is love stories n valentines bull shit I've got a head ache.... roll on tomorrow "

Top man, pint of mild for this guy please barman

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’d love a pint...of vodka.

Unfortunately I’m at work for another 3 hours and back at 8 tomorrow so no alcohol for me "

I’ll leave it in the pump for you

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By *urvyandCurious999Woman
over a year ago

Hiding from twats


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint? "

Yes please! Any decent cider on tap?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint? "

Yes please. Cappuccino Ale?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I will take a fuck "

One long screw coming right up

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please! "

What’s your poison

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’d love a pint...of vodka.

Unfortunately I’m at work for another 3 hours and back at 8 tomorrow so no alcohol for me

I’ll leave it in the pump for you "

Thanks

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please! Any decent cider on tap? "

A girl after my own

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Today mate, I'd drink anything so long as I'm not sober lol....

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please. Cappuccino Ale?"

Eh? What is this thou speaks of

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Today mate, I'd drink anything so long as I'm not sober lol....

"

White lightening it is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please!

What’s your poison "

Tequila please

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By *urvyandCurious999Woman
over a year ago

Hiding from twats


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please! Any decent cider on tap?

A girl after my own "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please!

What’s your poison

Tequila please "

Good choice, a tray of tequila slammers please barman for this young lady

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Tequila it makes you happy... I'll have a tray as well please hahaha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint? "

You just read my status, or what? Although now got people thinking I am upset about being single... I actually bloody love it!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Tequila it makes you happy... I'll have a tray as well please hahaha "

Coming right up

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

You just read my status, or what? Although now got people thinking I am upset about being single... I actually bloody love it! "

What you drinking?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm at work til 8pm. Anyone feels for me?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm at work til 8pm. Anyone feels for me? "

I’ll feel you

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke


"I will take a fuck "

U can have one off me if u want

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

A pool table and a large white sounds good

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

Top man, I’ll have a pint with u

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint? "

Yes please

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By *ememberTheNameMan
over a year ago

barnsley


"I will take a fuck "

I’d like it on tap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same, fab's not biting so i'm gonna try my luck in town

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A pool table and a large white sounds good"

Coming right up! I’ll gladly pot the pink

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Top man, I’ll have a pint with u "

A pint of lager please barman for this dude

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Spiced rum and splash of for me

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please "

Pint of ale for this guy please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I am ready for a drink,now, actually!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me "

I’d splash you

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I am ready for a drink,now, actually!"

Open wide

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you "

Lol not too much

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Same, fab's not biting so i'm gonna try my luck in town "

You’re going to Bangor in Bangor then?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am ready for a drink,now, actually!

Open wide "

I wanna know what it is first, please!?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/02/20 17:48:54]

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I am ready for a drink,now, actually!

Open wide

I wanna know what it is first, please!?"

It’s one of those squirty shots that hits the back of your throat

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Lemsip please "

No swearing on this thread please

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much

"

From your avtar I would let you too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint? "

I'd be anyone's after a pinot or two

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much

From your avtar I would let you too "

Ooooffftttt my underpants have just fell off

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"A pool table and a large white sounds good

Coming right up! I’ll gladly pot the pink "

That's snooker but hey, I'd like to see that shot

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

I'd be anyone's after a pinot or two "

3 Pinot’s please barman

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"A pool table and a large white sounds good

Coming right up! I’ll gladly pot the pink

That's snooker but hey, I'd like to see that shot "

Ooofffttt I’ll just chalk my tip

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much

From your avtar I would let you too

Ooooffftttt my underpants have just fell off "

You getting in the shower

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much

From your avtar I would let you too

Ooooffftttt my underpants have just fell off

You getting in the shower "

I’m hoping I’d be getting in something else

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much

From your avtar I would let you too

Ooooffftttt my underpants have just fell off

You getting in the shower

I’m hoping I’d be getting in something else "

Not my......

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much

From your avtar I would let you too

Ooooffftttt my underpants have just fell off

You getting in the shower

I’m hoping I’d be getting in something else

Not my...... "

Oohhh matron

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Contemplating the drink later

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint? "

Single malt whisky on the rocks please!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

You just read my status, or what? Although now got people thinking I am upset about being single... I actually bloody love it!

What you drinking? "

Gin n tonic please!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bottle of fizz and one glass. I'll be in the corner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Spiced rum and splash of for me

I’d splash you

Lol not too much

From your avtar I would let you too

Ooooffftttt my underpants have just fell off

You getting in the shower

I’m hoping I’d be getting in something else

Not my......

Oohhh matron "

Yes doctor lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Contemplating the drink later "

Here, have a pint

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Already in the pub!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Single malt whisky on the rocks please!"

Steady on now. Fuck it, here have a double

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

You just read my status, or what? Although now got people thinking I am upset about being single... I actually bloody love it!

What you drinking?

Gin n tonic please! "

Only a little bit of tonic though

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Bottle of fizz and one glass. I'll be in the corner "

One glass? we don’t drink alone here!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!! "

What’s in the middle of the egg?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Already in the pub!"

Get them in then tight arse

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38


"A pool table and a large white sounds good

Coming right up! I’ll gladly pot the pink

That's snooker but hey, I'd like to see that shot

Ooofffttt I’ll just chalk my tip "

Better set that shot up properly..can't have you miscuing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Already in the pub!

Get them in then tight arse "

Naturally tight arsed but after a few pints......

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By *orny IrishMan
over a year ago

Rural Wiltshire


"I will take a fuck "

On my way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you're single and you know it, pet your cat.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you're single and you know it, pet your cat. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you're single and you know it, pet your cat. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pint of Cider please

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By *manaWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke

I'll have a vodka, a fuck and a cake please

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you're single and you know it, pet your cat.

"

What you drinking girl?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Pint of Cider please "

Yeah, scrumpy it is

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!!

What’s in the middle of the egg? "

Come have a poke around and find out!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you're single and you know it, pet your cat.

What you drinking girl? "

Me? I’ll have a porn star martini please if you’re buying

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll have a vodka, a fuck and a cake please "

Oooffftttt a double fuck is on its way

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you're single and you know it, pet your cat.

What you drinking girl?

Me? I’ll have a porn star martini please if you’re buying "

OK, and a little suck?

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By *om and JennieCouple
over a year ago

Chams or Socials

I’d love a pint but on 2nd glass of red

J x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!!

What’s in the middle of the egg?

Come have a poke around and find out!! "

I’ve a snotty knob now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If you're single and you know it, pet your cat.

What you drinking girl?

Me? I’ll have a porn star martini please if you’re buying

OK, and a little suck? "

Just the tip

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would love a fuck

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm tee total I know it's shocking so I will just have a latte please with white sugar

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please. Cappuccino Ale?

Eh? What is this thou speaks of "

Delicious ale that tasted of coffee

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’d love a pint but on 2nd glass of red

J x"

A Pint is sliding it’s way down the bar to you now

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you're single and you know it, pet your cat.

What you drinking girl?

Me? I’ll have a porn star martini please if you’re buying

OK, and a little suck?

Just the tip "

Deal

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'm tee total I know it's shocking so I will just have a latte please with white sugar "

Of course, but no sugar as it’s very bad for you

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please. Cappuccino Ale?

Eh? What is this thou speaks of

Delicious ale that tasted of coffee "

OK, a pint of that please barman

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Yes please. Cappuccino Ale?

Eh? What is this thou speaks of

Delicious ale that tasted of coffee

OK, a pint of that please barman "

Awwww. Ta very much

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!!

What’s in the middle of the egg?

Come have a poke around and find out!!

I’ve a snotty knob now "

Where have you been dipping that!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!!

What’s in the middle of the egg?

Come have a poke around and find out!!

I’ve a snotty knob now

Where have you been dipping that!!! "

Someone’s ale up there ^^

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 14/02/20 17:48:54]"

someone can’t handle their ale

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!!

What’s in the middle of the egg?

Come have a poke around and find out!!

I’ve a snotty knob now

Where have you been dipping that!!!

Someone’s ale up there ^^ "

Oi. Better not be mine

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am ready for a drink,now, actually!

Open wide

I wanna know what it is first, please!?

It’s one of those squirty shots that hits the back of your throat "

Who went unlos ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Pint of shipyard please

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Went and bought a pizza, bottle of gin and an Easter egg instead!!!

What’s in the middle of the egg?

Come have a poke around and find out!!

I’ve a snotty knob now

Where have you been dipping that!!!

Someone’s ale up there ^^

Oi. Better not be mine "

It’s not brown through dipping it in coffee ale

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Pint of shipyard please "

On its way Captain

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 14/02/20 17:48:54]

someone can’t handle my member "

Fify!

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By *arksxMan
over a year ago

Leicester / London

For all that see through the (paper) thin commercial bullshit that is valentines day.

I give you comedian Lewis Black

https://youtu.be/AdJLEYR9Igw

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"[Removed by poster at 14/02/20 17:48:54]

someone can’t handle my member

Fify!"

Is that you LOO?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'll come but I'm warning you, I'm bringing my mini banjo and oh god yes do I sing and play on it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am ready for a drink,now, actually!

Open wide

I wanna know what it is first, please!?

It’s one of those squirty shots that hits the back of your throat

Who went unlos ?"

Cheeky

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll come but I'm warning you, I'm bringing my mini banjo and oh god yes do I sing and play on it. "

I read that as willy banjo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I am ready for a drink,now, actually!

Open wide

I wanna know what it is first, please!?

It’s one of those squirty shots that hits the back of your throat

Who went unlos ?

Cheeky "

Oh no, she seemed nice,,I hope she is ok

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By *rjimMan
over a year ago

nr bristol

Told the mrs I would take her up The Khyber for valentines, unfortunately she thinks it's a curry house !

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Told the mrs I would take her up The Khyber for valentines, unfortunately she thinks it's a curry house !

"

Either way her eyes will be watering

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Single malt whisky on the rocks please!

Steady on now. Fuck it, here have a double "

And another please!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’m off the pub. D’ya wanna pint?

Single malt whisky on the rocks please!

Steady on now. Fuck it, here have a double

And another please!"

Are you trying to take advantage of me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Nah, I'll get the next two! XD

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Nah, I'll get the next two! XD "

Yeah

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Great fucking guys

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By *manaWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I'll have a vodka, a fuck and a cake please

Oooffftttt a double fuck is on its way "

And vodka and cake right?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll have a vodka, a fuck and a cake please

Oooffftttt a double fuck is on its way

And vodka and cake right? "

After the fuck otherwise you’ll be sick

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By *manaWoman
over a year ago

Basingstoke


"I'll have a vodka, a fuck and a cake please

Oooffftttt a double fuck is on its way

And vodka and cake right?

After the fuck otherwise you’ll be sick "

Good call

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