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Divorce questions

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

First of thank you for reading. I issued divorce proceedings on my ex wife approx 9 months ago. For months she done nothing about it. I had offered to pay her solicitors fees to fasten the process. Since then we had a slight falling out when she stated “ I’ll take everything you own from you”. This was followed up with a solicitors letter 2 day’s later seeking a financial settlement. I replied via my solicitor merely asking what is she seeking. I.e a one of lump sum. No reply. I own my own house bought after split. I’m in a lot of debt ( the debt outweighs the equity in the property). Sadly since then

Her father has passed away and she’s set to inherit approx £250k. What do I do? She previously had point blank refused to engage in disclosing bank accounts. But now I know she’s inherited money. I just want divorced ASAP and no money to

Swap hands. Any advice

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I got told that if property was bought after a separation and you can prove you were separated at that time that the spouse has no legal right to said property.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I got told that if property was bought after a separation and you can prove you were separated at that time that the spouse has no legal right to said property. "
That’s what I’ve been told by my solicitor. I just simply want divorced and she’s dragging her heels for months and months

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By *lbinoGorillaMan
over a year ago

Redditch

I can't offer any advice, unfortunately, but it sounds similar to my situation. Although we weren't actually married, and it's the house that's at the heart of the arguments, but it was very one-sided in her favour and I was too stupid to see it....

Good luck, OP, and hope it doesn't take too long to sort.

Although if she still doesn't want to play ball you could wlalways say you want your half of her inheritance. That should focus the mind somewhat

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I can't offer any advice, unfortunately, but it sounds similar to my situation. Although we weren't actually married, and it's the house that's at the heart of the arguments, but it was very one-sided in her favour and I was too stupid to see it....

Good luck, OP, and hope it doesn't take too long to sort.

Although if she still doesn't want to play ball you could wlalways say you want your half of her inheritance. That should focus the mind somewhat "
I don’t want to do that. But I’m hoping solicitors will advise her to sign up ASAP!!

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By *lbinoGorillaMan
over a year ago

Redditch


"I can't offer any advice, unfortunately, but it sounds similar to my situation. Although we weren't actually married, and it's the house that's at the heart of the arguments, but it was very one-sided in her favour and I was too stupid to see it....

Good luck, OP, and hope it doesn't take too long to sort.

Although if she still doesn't want to play ball you could wlalways say you want your half of her inheritance. That should focus the mind somewhat I don’t want to do that. But I’m hoping solicitors will advise her to sign up ASAP!!"

Yes, I realise that.

Were you more financially involved in the marriage than her?

Her "taking you for everything you've got" makes me wonder. Or she's dragging it out knowing there's a weight of debt on you, and she's got nothing to lose.

But now you have a bargaining chip and she now does have something to lose it might help speed things up

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Do you have a solicitor? They should be able to give you all necessary advice. I'm going through a divorce too. It is possible to get the decree nici without her engagement. All assets and debt are joint property including her inheritance as far I am led to believe. The methods for making it happen are available through your solicitor. Sit down with one and get some proper advice. Luke

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I can't offer any advice, unfortunately, but it sounds similar to my situation. Although we weren't actually married, and it's the house that's at the heart of the arguments, but it was very one-sided in her favour and I was too stupid to see it....

Good luck, OP, and hope it doesn't take too long to sort.

Although if she still doesn't want to play ball you could wlalways say you want your half of her inheritance. That should focus the mind somewhat I don’t want to do that. But I’m hoping solicitors will advise her to sign up ASAP!!

Yes, I realise that.

Were you more financially involved in the marriage than her?

Her "taking you for everything you've got" makes me wonder. Or she's dragging it out knowing there's a weight of debt on you, and she's got nothing to lose.

But now you have a bargaining chip and she now does have something to lose it might help speed things up "
She would think my finances are better than they are. That’s her stumbling block.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Do you have a solicitor? They should be able to give you all necessary advice. I'm going through a divorce too. It is possible to get the decree nici without her engagement. All assets and debt are joint property including her inheritance as far I am led to believe. The methods for making it happen are available through your solicitor. Sit down with one and get some proper advice. Luke "
yes I have a solicitor. Well her asset would outweigh mine significantly. I’ll go see the solicitor again.. how’s your divorce going?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

Divorce is never easy and solicitors can make it more difficult but in your case I would advise you to take their advice. Nobody in here can give you useful advice based on what you've written and it won't help you in the long run.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Divorce is never easy and solicitors can make it more difficult but in your case I would advise you to take their advice. Nobody in here can give you useful advice based on what you've written and it won't help you in the long run. "
I will 100% take my solicitors advice

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex


"Divorce is never easy and solicitors can make it more difficult but in your case I would advise you to take their advice. Nobody in here can give you useful advice based on what you've written and it won't help you in the long run. I will 100% take my solicitors advice "

Good!

I hope it gets sorted fairly for you both

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford


" I issued divorce proceedings on my ex wife approx 9 months ago. For months she done nothing about it.

Since then we had a slight falling out when she stated “ I’ll take everything you own from you”. This was followed up with a solicitors letter 2 day’s later seeking a financial settlement.

Sadly since then Her father has passed away and she’s set to inherit approx £250k. What do I do? She previously had point blank refused to engage in disclosing bank accounts. But now I know she’s inherited money. I just want divorced ASAP and no money to Swap hands. Any advice "

as shes already made it clear with the clear out comment you can also do the same as well you have every right to the inherited money

it works both ways when one threatens the other about money

seen it often when partners are still maried years after the fact and yet still come for inheritence money when not lived together for years

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Divorce is never easy and solicitors can make it more difficult but in your case I would advise you to take their advice. Nobody in here can give you useful advice based on what you've written and it won't help you in the long run. I will 100% take my solicitors advice

Good!

I hope it gets sorted fairly for you both"
that’s all I want

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

At the end of the day, if she won't engage you would have to start court proceedings, which can be expensive. Your solicitor can advise you on that.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


" I issued divorce proceedings on my ex wife approx 9 months ago. For months she done nothing about it.

Since then we had a slight falling out when she stated “ I’ll take everything you own from you”. This was followed up with a solicitors letter 2 day’s later seeking a financial settlement.

Sadly since then Her father has passed away and she’s set to inherit approx £250k. What do I do? She previously had point blank refused to engage in disclosing bank accounts. But now I know she’s inherited money. I just want divorced ASAP and no money to Swap hands. Any advice

as shes already made it clear with the clear out comment you can also do the same as well you have every right to the inherited money

it works both ways when one threatens the other about money

seen it often when partners are still maried years after the fact and yet still come for inheritence money when not lived together for years "
she’s totally lost it with the whole thing. She threatened as stated she’d “ come after my pension” after the dust had settled I try to reason with her and explained if her pension is worth more than mine then she pays me! She was baffled at this

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

If you have not done a financial agreement then you have a bargaining tool now. If you don't want any of her inheritance and just the divorce then ask her to sign and you won't ask for any of her money

Until the FA is done I think all monies are up for discussion, yours and hers

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If you have not done a financial agreement then you have a bargaining tool now. If you don't want any of her inheritance and just the divorce then ask her to sign and you won't ask for any of her money

Until the FA is done I think all monies are up for discussion, yours and hers"
I don’t want her money. But even before inheritance she won’t engage in full disclosure

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been through it all and lost everything my home my car all my possessions I built up over the the years it’s not easy and if she is dragging her heals there really isn’t a lot you can do about it if she wants to try and take you for all you’ve got then let her try if you’ve nothing to give as she will end up loosing out and owing you as regardless of who’s the debt is the courts see it as a joint debt and she will owe half as you would hers the same goes for any assets you had as a couple also inheritance regardless of separation your entitled to half as no decree absolute has been issued that is the only time either party can’t claim anyone else’s assets unless the penny clause is in that agreement

So be careful some solicitors say your not or she’s not entitled etc without knowing all the facts and yes they should know better but until the glade red absolute is in force all assets and debt are joint by law unless you both agree otherwise in court or mediation

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Also if it goes to court or mediation she has to give full disclosure that is out of her hands and if she dosent they will dig further as they will see it as she is trying to hid or defraud so that’s her loss there not yours she will have to disclose

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Look up the law regarding her inheritance.

If you are entitled in law to half of what she owns before divorce then go for it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Whether the desired Divorce has been agreed by both side or not, once it is registered at the Court (which ultimately it will have to be, as the Courts will issue the Nisi and Absolute, as it is a legal Marriage Partnership, You both have to complete a Form E which spells out all the assets - AND liabilities/debts - of the Marriage and each other. At a set date so no Party has an advantage in seeing the others’ first, each side swaps each other’s completed Form E, and then you look at what your spouse/Partner has declared as assets and liabilities.

You can ask any questions about what’s been declared - or not declared, more apositely, and give a reasonable timeframe for those questions to be asked (and usually, re-asked and re-asked, until the information is declared). In an initial Hearing, and subsequent Hearings, the Court can agree to legally put questions to each Party that MUST be answered or responded to (although the Court may not require ALL your questions to be put, for example if you are just being awkward or malicious or vexatious). But you can challenge the Spouse to provide evidence for what’s been written in the Form E, like bank statements, credit card, hp statements, or corroborating proofs etc). One common (deliberate!) oversight for example, that spouses make, is like the car....”but it’s not worth the £ that I owe on it:I owe more than it’s worth”. That may be true, but says it’s worth a £100 and you owe £200 on it....if you were to sell it for £100 then your debt has now reduced from £200 to £100. If you choose to keep the car, it’s no legal argument that you have £200 worth of debt.

Caution though....Solicitors are expensive. Most Spouses assume that the ex will be liable for their legal fees, but EACH PARTY is liable for their own fees, unless there is a final agreement otherwise or the Court directs all or part to be paid by the ex.

This all applies equally to Men and Women, so you should read ‘Spouse’ to apply to both, as well as in Civil Partnerships etc.

Phew - I need a coffee!

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

One thing to make note of is if you had the 250k come to you she would want it.

Give her what is right in the eye of the law and seek what is your right also and if that includes part of the 250k then take it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I should have said this applies to England&Wales, as Scottish Law is a differently based legal system.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Firstly if you are still married and shes inherited that cash your entitled. Im in a similar situation although were working on repairing things as its my demons thats caused the split.

she didnt want a penny i offered her 3 on my rental houses & 120k left me by my grandma in sept aslong as she didnt touch my cars and home (this is what by law she was entitled too accordingto the divorce lawyer), we split in july after being married for 10 years & together for 19 years. She turned round and said she didnt want a penny.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Whether the desired Divorce has been agreed by both side or not, once it is registered at the Court (which ultimately it will have to be, as the Courts will issue the Nisi and Absolute, as it is a legal Marriage Partnership, You both have to complete a Form E which spells out all the assets - AND liabilities/debts - of the Marriage and each other. At a set date so no Party has an advantage in seeing the others’ first, each side swaps each other’s completed Form E, and then you look at what your spouse/Partner has declared as assets and liabilities.

You can ask any questions about what’s been declared - or not declared, more apositely, and give a reasonable timeframe for those questions to be asked (and usually, re-asked and re-asked, until the information is declared). In an initial Hearing, and subsequent Hearings, the Court can agree to legally put questions to each Party that MUST be answered or responded to (although the Court may not require ALL your questions to be put, for example if you are just being awkward or malicious or vexatious). But you can challenge the Spouse to provide evidence for what’s been written in the Form E, like bank statements, credit card, hp statements, or corroborating proofs etc). One common (deliberate!) oversight for example, that spouses make, is like the car....”but it’s not worth the £ that I owe on it:I owe more than it’s worth”. That may be true, but says it’s worth a £100 and you owe £200 on it....if you were to sell it for £100 then your debt has now reduced from £200 to £100. If you choose to keep the car, it’s no legal argument that you have £200 worth of debt.

Caution though....Solicitors are expensive. Most Spouses assume that the ex will be liable for their legal fees, but EACH PARTY is liable for their own fees, unless there is a final agreement otherwise or the Court directs all or part to be paid by the ex.

This all applies equally to Men and Women, so you should read ‘Spouse’ to apply to both, as well as in Civil Partnerships etc.

Phew - I need a coffee!"

Need to issue a Form A to start financial proceedings

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo


"If you have not done a financial agreement then you have a bargaining tool now. If you don't want any of her inheritance and just the divorce then ask her to sign and you won't ask for any of her money

Until the FA is done I think all monies are up for discussion, yours and hers I don’t want her money. But even before inheritance she won’t engage in full disclosure "

Your solicitor would be able to ask for that. Use it as leverage then, she may well sign them after that

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Also if it goes to court or mediation she has to give full disclosure that is out of her hands and if she dosent they will dig further as they will see it as she is trying to hid or defraud so that’s her loss there not yours she will have to disclose "
Hi thank you. I really think she is trying to hid income from me. She works and gets working tax credits plus my contribution. All told I’d assume she’s better off than me. I truly don’t want her money. I just want a legally binding divorce ASAP

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Whether the desired Divorce has been agreed by both side or not, once it is registered at the Court (which ultimately it will have to be, as the Courts will issue the Nisi and Absolute, as it is a legal Marriage Partnership, You both have to complete a Form E which spells out all the assets - AND liabilities/debts - of the Marriage and each other. At a set date so no Party has an advantage in seeing the others’ first, each side swaps each other’s completed Form E, and then you look at what your spouse/Partner has declared as assets and liabilities.

You can ask any questions about what’s been declared - or not declared, more apositely, and give a reasonable timeframe for those questions to be asked (and usually, re-asked and re-asked, until the information is declared). In an initial Hearing, and subsequent Hearings, the Court can agree to legally put questions to each Party that MUST be answered or responded to (although the Court may not require ALL your questions to be put, for example if you are just being awkward or malicious or vexatious). But you can challenge the Spouse to provide evidence for what’s been written in the Form E, like bank statements, credit card, hp statements, or corroborating proofs etc). One common (deliberate!) oversight for example, that spouses make, is like the car....”but it’s not worth the £ that I owe on it:I owe more than it’s worth”. That may be true, but says it’s worth a £100 and you owe £200 on it....if you were to sell it for £100 then your debt has now reduced from £200 to £100. If you choose to keep the car, it’s no legal argument that you have £200 worth of debt.

Caution though....Solicitors are expensive. Most Spouses assume that the ex will be liable for their legal fees, but EACH PARTY is liable for their own fees, unless there is a final agreement otherwise or the Court directs all or part to be paid by the ex.

This all applies equally to Men and Women, so you should read ‘Spouse’ to apply to both, as well as in Civil Partnerships etc.

Phew - I need a coffee!"
lol very insightful and thank you!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Go see a lawyer. Fab won't give you the answers you need.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Go see a lawyer. Fab won't give you the answers you need."
I have done

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford


"I just want a legally binding divorce ASAP "

rush too much and you will forget what you need to do.

legally binding divource dosnt mean the end of it.

weve seen often enough where the ex comes back for more years after the fact

id look up this

Unless you also put a Clean Break Order or a Consent Order in place, your ex-spouse could be able to make a financial claim against you in the future, even if you acquired the money after your divorce.

Your ex-spouse can absolutely claim your pension after your divorce if there is no legally binding financial agreement in place.

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