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Are you honest with yourself?

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By *wist my nipples OP   Couple
over a year ago

North East Scotland, mostly

Apropos of the news about Philip Schofield today, I've been very reflective. A huge amount of pain and hurt I've seen, experienced and inflicted in life has been through people - myself included - not being honest with themselves.

Why do we do it? Why do we find it so difficult to look at ourselves, warts and all? Or do you find that easy?

Mrs TMN x

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Sometimes things aren't as simple as they seem. Lots of assumptions built over lifetimes to unpack. Various psychological traps to fall into.

I wish it were that simple!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It's very hard for people to take a step back and evaluate themselves in this way. But when one is able to, it makes life a lot easier in the way of being more comfortable living with one's skin, and therefore, makes one able to converse with others in their lives more openly and honest.

Most people when conversing, or giving advice, tend to condense whatever story, brush off the boring parts and never paint themselves as the villian...

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

[Removed by poster at 07/02/20 18:28:38]

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss


"Apropos of the news about Philip Schofield today, I've been very reflective. A huge amount of pain and hurt I've seen, experienced and inflicted in life has been through people - myself included - not being honest with themselves.

Why do we do it? Why do we find it so difficult to look at ourselves, warts and all? Or do you find that easy?

Mrs TMN x

I was lied to the whole of my childhood by someone who was supposed to love me unconditionally and care for me.

As an adult when I was able to break free I vowed never to put anyone through what I went through by not being honest with myself and them, I understand feelings and love can cloud judgement but to cause pain when you could have just told the truth and walked away is something I would never do. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don't think anyone who lies to themselves is ever happy. But if even here people still use terms like faggot then I can understand why men struggle with admitting it even to themselves let alone to anyone else.

I'm about as gay friendly as it's possible to be, I've been going to gay clubs since my mid teens. But it still took my boyfriend years to admit that he liked guys and he still thought there was a chance he'd lose me or that I'd think less of him. Even now I'm careful to be sensitive about it because he's still getting comfortable with being open about it even with me.

I wish it wasn't like this for men, I really do. I hate to think of unhappy men hiding secret lives. But I completely understand why they do it. Anyone who says Pride is unnecessary and thinks homophobia is a thing of the past... Wake up. If people here use terms like "bowel basher" what do you think it's like out there

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