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Hateful life

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

There is a lot of talk on here about how cheating is bad...however a shit, nasty, pushy relationship is worse

I'm absolutely wankered and willing to talk to anyone stuck in an awful marriage/relationship

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London

I don’t think top trumps for what’s worse is helpful. But, the point of the thread is to offer support and that’s lovely.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

OP are you OK.

X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"There is a lot of talk on here about how cheating is bad...however a shit, nasty, pushy relationship is worse

I'm absolutely wankered and willing to talk to anyone stuck in an awful marriage/relationship "

Yes it is. I was faithful and regret it bitterly. I should have thought of myself because I would have been the only one doing so. Hope you're OK xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Sorry ladies this really wasnt meant to be an attention thread. Everything is just really shitty at the moment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been there... sometimes still feel the effect on self esteem.

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By *stellaWoman
over a year ago

London


"Sorry ladies this really wasnt meant to be an attention thread. Everything is just really shitty at the moment "

Big hugs. My mumma always says “this too shall pass”, and I really hope whatever it is does for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry ladies this really wasnt meant to be an attention thread. Everything is just really shitty at the moment "

It doesn't come across as an attention thread. Just someone who is having a shitty time and that's OK. X

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By *ambofkMan
over a year ago

Hamilton

I have been in a toxic relationship before and they never end well i truly hope everything ends up well with you OP x

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By *orksRockerMan
over a year ago

Bradford


"There is a lot of talk on here about how cheating is bad...however a shit, nasty, pushy relationship is worse

I'm absolutely wankered and willing to talk to anyone stuck in an awful marriage/relationship

Yes it is. I was faithful and regret it bitterly. I should have thought of myself because I would have been the only one doing so. Hope you're OK xx"

I was utterly faithful too and my ex wasn't an old occasion.. And the last occasion too.. Feel like a fool sometimes now, but I wouldn't change what I did.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

Some people on here are far too quick to judge. Yes cheating is wrong, but a bad relationship is wrong too and incredibly difficult to deal with, you can feel stuck between a rock and a hard place.

We are fortunate that we have a great marriage, however it has taken some working at to get where we are today. We can appreciate how difficult things can be for others so we try not to judge other peoples circumstances when we know nothing about what goes on behind closed doors.

Hope you're ok OP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry ladies this really wasnt meant to be an attention thread. Everything is just really shitty at the moment "

You're not attention seeking at all xxx loads of us will know just how you feel

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don't feel bad about cheating if that's what you want to do fuck what other people think

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By *lbinoGorillaMan
over a year ago

Redditch

I've bedn in what was, with the benefit of hindsight, a toxic relationship although I didn't realise it at the time.

But it's damaged me, and helped screw up my subsequent relationship

Hope your troubles pass soon, OP

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Hope things brighten up Op and for anyone who's not got the best for them atm

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I hope you're OK OP

X

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford


"Sorry ladies this really wasnt meant to be an attention thread. Everything is just really shitty at the moment "

It happens. I’m right there in a shitty relationship, the counselling is difficult but helps me see things as they are.

I know the traditional outlook on here is that cheating is cowardly and always bad and they should be humiliated in public for doing it.

However an actual qualified professional sees it differently. You have needs for intimacy, honesty about your sexual desires and so forth. If that’s not met in your current relationship and talking doesn’t help (shock - you can’t resolve everything by talking, especially if the other person doesn’t want to) then you have 2 choices.

1. Suppress your needs.

2. Get them met elsewhere.

I can verify that doing option 1 doesn’t work for long.

I hope you can get what you need and you can make the shitty feeling really fuck off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I can understand where the Op is coming from

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By *mberWoman
over a year ago

Preston


"Sorry ladies this really wasnt meant to be an attention thread. Everything is just really shitty at the moment

It happens. I’m right there in a shitty relationship, the counselling is difficult but helps me see things as they are.

I know the traditional outlook on here is that cheating is cowardly and always bad and they should be humiliated in public for doing it.

However an actual qualified professional sees it differently. You have needs for intimacy, honesty about your sexual desires and so forth. If that’s not met in your current relationship and talking doesn’t help (shock - you can’t resolve everything by talking, especially if the other person doesn’t want to) then you have 2 choices.

1. Suppress your needs.

2. Get them met elsewhere.

I can verify that doing option 1 doesn’t work for long.

I hope you can get what you need and you can make the shitty feeling really fuck off."

I agree with this wholeheartedly. I did 1. for 5 years. Then a situation occurred where I wanted 2. I was lucky enough that I was in a position to leave. So I did. It was hard, he was my best friend in many ways.

I don't judge people in these situations, we never know what it's like until we've been there.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I’ve been in those situations ...

I think this place is dangerous for those in pushy and manipulative relationships

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I’ve been in those situations ...

I think this place is dangerous for those in pushy and manipulative relationships

"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hey gorgeous. Nobody can judge you unless they have walked in your shoes. If they do, they’re not worth knowing anyways.

Love ya and chat when your hangover has gone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey gorgeous. Nobody can judge you unless they have walked in your shoes. If they do, they’re not worth knowing anyways.

Love ya and chat when your hangover has gone. "

Agreed .... with the not judging

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford


"Hey gorgeous. Nobody can judge you unless they have walked in your shoes. If they do, they’re not worth knowing anyways.

Love ya and chat when your hangover has gone. "

Yes, I hope she comes back to this today and sees some support.

Even though you’ve apparently got her shoes?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People will judge on the basis of information available to them

It's naive to think otherwise, so sometimes it's better to not put everything out there

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By *adbury girlWoman
over a year ago

Lanarkshire

You’ve got to do what’s right for you, people always judge no matter the circumstances so it’s better to try hold your head above the judgements and live your life the way you want xx

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford


"People will judge on the basis of information available to them

It's naive to think otherwise, so sometimes it's better to not put everything out there"

True. However it’s worth rem_mbering that the people who bare their souls on here are doing it because they need to; they need to be honest and be supported for it.

Of course everyone can comment on a public forum, but it’s worth thinking of the effect of your words too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Hey gorgeous. Nobody can judge you unless they have walked in your shoes. If they do, they’re not worth knowing anyways.

Love ya and chat when your hangover has gone.

Yes, I hope she comes back to this today and sees some support.

Even though you’ve apparently got her shoes? "

I had her shoes yes . Hope you’re doing ok too sweetheart

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By *hilloutMan
over a year ago

All over the place! Northwesr, , Southwest


"I’ve been in those situations ...

I think this place is dangerous for those in pushy and manipulative relationships

"

I agree. I think some people in this situation may not have all their defenses up and allow their emotional fragility and lack of affection to make them easy prey for the predatory, manipulative types.

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By *latinumkittenWoman
over a year ago

from Home Counties to Middle Earth

I recall that hateful life and the feelings of entrapment. I impulsively jumped ship, not knowing if I'd drown, just in the belief that it couldn't be any worse. It wasn't. I'm really happy. And wish I'd done it sooner.

Big hugs coming your way.

I hope you find your happiness x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

The hangover today is very very real!

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