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Age gap

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

I recently started noticing a woman where I work, she's a gorgeous woman, but 33 years younger than me. Comments please, and advice on how to approach her, without coming across as a dirty old man lol, she is very flirty with me, so maybe in with a chance

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Anyone older than half your age plus 7 is fair game

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By *ark ph0enixWoman
over a year ago

Teesside

[Removed by poster at 28/01/20 16:52:17]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I recently started noticing a woman where I work, she's a gorgeous woman, but 33 years younger than me. Comments please, and advice on how to approach her, without coming across as a dirty old man lol, she is very flirty with me, so maybe in with a chance "

I stay away from sex or dates even with anyone I work with. Had a nightmare years ago so learned my lesson. I'm not saying it couldn't work op, but I dont risk it anymore

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By *ark ph0enixWoman
over a year ago

Teesside


"Anyone older than half your age plus 7 is fair game "

I don't like your equation.

I'll stick with my own version. Its much more fun my way

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Anyone older than half your age plus 7 is fair game

I don't like your equation.

I'll stick with my own version. Its much more fun my way"

Whats your version?

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By *inky Biscuit DunkerMan
over a year ago

Gloucestershire


"I recently started noticing a woman where I work, she's a gorgeous woman, but 33 years younger than me. Comments please, and advice on how to approach her, without coming across as a dirty old man lol, she is very flirty with me, so maybe in with a chance "

Do you enjoy your job? If so, I'd suggest keeping it as just a fantasy.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ask her how her relationship with her dad is

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By *rghYeTimbersMan
over a year ago

Ipswich

It's less common but it has been known to work, depending on where people are in life and what the exptations are. A quick internet search will list several married couples with a big age gap.

There are loads of considerations and like any relationship lots to discuss but if people are adults why not if it's a strong loving bond. Like everything it will have critics and supporters.

Apparently the average age for Male marriage is now 40 so how old is too old? As for short term NSA relations age is just a number.

https://www.ons.gov.uk/peoplepopulationandcommunity/birthsdeathsandmarriages/marriagecohabitationandcivilpartnerships/bulletins/marriagesinenglandandwalesprovisional/2016

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By *rghYeTimbersMan
over a year ago

Ipswich

It is worth considering as you're both at work if any approach or relationship could be considered exploitative or a breach of organisational policy employment rules can be complicated.

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By *ark ph0enixWoman
over a year ago

Teesside


"Anyone older than half your age plus 7 is fair game

I don't like your equation.

I'll stick with my own version. Its much more fun my way

Whats your version?"

Half without the plus 7

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By *wisted999Man
over a year ago

North Bucks

I would probably take an objective view of the flirty behaviour before approaching someone with an age difference that much. And because it’s at work.

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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago

Merseyside


"Anyone older than half your age plus 7 is fair game

I don't like your equation.

I'll stick with my own version. Its much more fun my way

Whats your version?

Half without the plus 7 "

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

If I'm old enough to be their mother it's not an attraction. 20 is so young, I can't get my head round it.

My advice would be to tread carefully as it's the place you work and I'm sure you're aware that her flirting with you may not necessarily mean she wants it to go further. Read her signals carefully. She might not have the maturity to handle an older guy coming on to her. Or, if that bit was successful .. the maturity to handle the dynamics afterwards.

I actually feel a bit protective towards her!

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

She's probably just a friendly girl, always tread carefully with colleagues

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Are you sure she’s flirting? Maybe take the time to see if she actually is.

I had a situation at work with an older guy who thought I was ‘flirting’ I was actually just being friendly. Made me SUPER uncomfortable when he sent me a message about it.

It will not be worth making your/their work environment awkward because wires were crossed

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)


"She's probably just a friendly girl, always tread carefully with colleagues "

Exactly this. She most likely thinks that you'd be a good match for her mum rather than for her.

It seems to a common fantasy for an older guy to 'pull' a younger woman, most likely based around a want to appear virile and that the guy 'still has it'. It's very, very rarely a fantasy for a young woman to want to be with an older guy.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford


"She's probably just a friendly girl, always tread carefully with colleagues

Exactly this. She most likely thinks that you'd be a good match for her mum rather than for her.

It seems to a common fantasy for an older guy to 'pull' a younger woman, most likely based around a want to appear virile and that the guy 'still has it'. It's very, very rarely a fantasy for a young woman to want to be with an older guy. "

OP just enjoy her friendship

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By *hetalkingstoveMan
over a year ago

London

Assuming this isn't a made up fantasy, don't approach a much younger woman at work in that way. The chances that she's up for it are much lower than the chances that anything you do will make her very uncomfortable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Noooo, don't go there OP.

I work with a couple of men who are 30 years older than me who I get on with, one of which I get on particularly well and always give him a hug when I see him, and I tend to call him my love or my darling. That means I'm very fond of him but I'd be mortified if he thought it was more.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Try not to mix personal life with professional life OP,its not worth it,I've been there a couple of times people talk enough about you in work anyway,dont be giving them any more ammo, she's probably just a friendly girl,if you think she's into you take it as a compliment and leave it as a fantasy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Don’t.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I don’t think I would’ve been sexually interested in a 53 year old when I was 20, I don’t even have that age in my upper age limit now and I’m 36.

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By *irty PrettyWoman
over a year ago

Cardiff

Are you sure a 20-year-old woman is flirting with you? Or is she just being friendly? I was sexually assaulted by a colleague who thought I was flirting with him when I was just being friendly and professional. And he wasn’t old enough to be my father. The best thing you can do is absolutely nothing. If she wants more than a good working relationship, let her come to you. Because if you hit on her and you’ve got it wrong, you could be fired.

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By *nto My ArmsMan
over a year ago

Herts/London


"Do you enjoy your job? "

... Or your marriage?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod

over a year ago

East Sussex

I have known women in relationships with 30 odd year age gaps.

If you genuinely believe she's flirting and I'd be hopeful that you have the experience and maturity to be realistic about that, then approach her as you would any woman. What comes after that is up to both of you.

You must be aware though that this could have consequences that would be far worse for you than for her if things went wrong.

Whatever you decide I hope it works out for the best for everyone involved

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By *rnaughty90Man
over a year ago

blackburn

Ask her out for a drink flirt back but let her make the first move would be my advice and as for work place fun it's all fun and games until the manager finds out and gets jel because u jumped on it first lol

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By *rnaughty90Man
over a year ago

blackburn

Way to put him off lol being nice and flirting are diff

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Are you sure she’s flirting? Maybe take the time to see if she actually is.

I had a situation at work with an older guy who thought I was ‘flirting’ I was actually just being friendly. Made me SUPER uncomfortable when he sent me a message about it.

It will not be worth making your/their work environment awkward because wires were crossed"

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By *uicy jonesMan
over a year ago

near a big hill in s/ shropshire NOT in


"I recently started noticing a woman where I work, she's a gorgeous woman, but 33 years younger than me. Comments please, and advice on how to approach her, without coming across as a dirty old man lol, she is very flirty with me, so maybe in with a chance "

From past experiences with work colleagues doesn’t always end well if it ends or when it ends

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

First swinging experience and mmf in my life I was 20 and the lady about 54 . But my lord best memories .. and she had a daughter of my age didn't stop her ..

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By *ecky2000Couple
over a year ago

Birmingham

We have set our age limits 10 years either way of ours works for us x

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By *inkyLondonpairCouple
over a year ago

London

The chances of a 20 year old woman being sexually interested in a married 53 year old man are tiny.

As a fellow 53 year old I've found over the past few years that young women have become more chatty with me. The harsh reality its that's because I remind them of their dad and they don't see me, given my age, as a sexual being. That's almost certainly what's going on here.

So my advice is don't touch this with a barge pole. There is a 99% chance she'll be mortified by any sexual approach and at best that will make things very awkward at work in future and at worse you might get sacked.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

Thanks for all the feedback on this, it has goven me lots to think about.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Thanks for all the feedback on this, it has goven me lots to think about."

So what are you going to do?

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By *oupleErotiqueCouple
over a year ago

Ascot

When I was 39, I was dating a 19 year old

We were in a restaurant once and a table next to us kept calling me “paedo”, “pervert” and all sorts of names

It completely ruined our tenth anniversary

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