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What should I do?

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By *hite Snake OP   Man
over a year ago

leeds

We have been swinging for around 20 years. My wife is terminally ill and is struggling with sex and has told me to carry on going on meets and to clubs. We have always played together (same house or clubs occasionaly seperate rooms) I feel like this would be cheating even though she says she doesn't mind what should I do?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it

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By *rmrs1234Couple
over a year ago

Waterford


"We have been swinging for around 20 years. My wife is terminally ill and is struggling with sex and has told me to carry on going on meets and to clubs. We have always played together (same house or clubs occasionaly seperate rooms) I feel like this would be cheating even though she says she doesn't mind what should I do? "

Im sorry that your wife is so ill OP. You need to go with your feelings as regards this. Noone else can make the decision for you. I wish you and your wife the very best in these times

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"If you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it "

Exactly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm sorry to hear about your wife.

With regards to your question only you can answer, you have to go with what feels right for you, just because she's given you permission doesn't mean you have to do it.

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land

I'm really sorry to hear your other half is unwell. It's a really traumatic time for you, you do what you need to to get through it all. Sending you positive thoughts

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By *omesticated_VixenWoman
over a year ago

sw London


"If you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it "

I agree with this x

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

Sorry to hear that OP, it must be a hard situation.

It's good that you can talk with your partner, but ultimately if it feels like cheating to you then don't do it.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

I think this is one for you to keep discussing as a couple. I’m very sorry to hear that news too.

I hope you make the most of the time you have together.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

What do you want to do as a couple? That's all that matters.

Sorry that you're both facing this

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By *luebell888Woman
over a year ago

Glasgowish

I would have thought that if your wife was terminally ill that you would want to spend every last minute with her and nobody else.

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By *ll-Knight-longMan
over a year ago

Derby/Notts(Long Eaton)

Maybe the time is best spent with her while you can, she is obviously thinking of you but live for the now not the past and our thoughts are with you for the future

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

In this situation, like many situations, allow your heart to make a decision. Your ego and libido will seek out the pleasure, I'm not saying that's wrong at all, but take time out together and listen to your heart, it rarely lies. Wishing you happiness and peace.xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sorry to hear about your better half!!

That choice can only be made by you I’m afraid and it’s going to be a hard one to make.

Personally I wouldn’t play without my wife and if I were you I’d maybe think about leaving it until your life has settled down again so you can give your wife 110% of your love and time.

The very best of luck.

T

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By *pforFUN100Man
over a year ago

Everywhere

Sorry to hear about your wife. No one can tell you what to do - in this situation I would (this is just me and you don't need to take the advice), just take a break from swinging for a while. We do have physical needs - but as we get older we realise that our mental well-being is just as important - in that guilt is a feeling that can really effect you.

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By *amissCouple
over a year ago

chelmsford

So sorry to hear about your wife. Only you know if she is really comfortable with this, but don't do something you may regret, at this time. Positive thoughts coming your way, for your wife

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"We have been swinging for around 20 years. My wife is terminally ill and is struggling with sex and has told me to carry on going on meets and to clubs. We have always played together (same house or clubs occasionaly seperate rooms) I feel like this would be cheating even though she says she doesn't mind what should I do? "
do you need it that bad, take her out do things with her or just be with her, thats what I'd do

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By *ntrigued32Couple
over a year ago

Nottingham

Sorry to hear about your wife obviously she cares for you greatly to say you can continue without her. Only you can decide but if it was me, I wouldn’t even contemplate it, I would be absorbing my time with the woman I love

D.

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire


"If you don’t feel comfortable then don’t do it

I agree with this x"

So do I .... if you do then you probably won’t enjoy it and will probably regret it.

Sending your other half hugs OP

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

Go with yr head and really sorry about ur good lady ...

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By *is BitchCouple
over a year ago

Sheffield

So sorry..

To be honest I would put swinging to one side and enjoy the time with your wife

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sex is just sex. The companionship and trust you have with your wife is worth so much more, no matter how long it lasts. If the thought makes you feel bad now, it will be magnified hugely when the unthinkable happens.

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury


"We have been swinging for around 20 years. My wife is terminally ill and is struggling with sex and has told me to carry on going on meets and to clubs. We have always played together (same house or clubs occasionaly seperate rooms) I feel like this would be cheating even though she says she doesn't mind what should I do? "

Talk to her and explain how you feel.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Sorry to hear about your wife obviously she cares for you greatly to say you can continue without her. Only you can decide but if it was me, I wouldn’t even contemplate it, I would be absorbing my time with the woman I love

D."

I am in agreement with this. I'm sorry OP.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit


"Sorry to hear about your wife obviously she cares for you greatly to say you can continue without her. Only you can decide but if it was me, I wouldn’t even contemplate it, I would be absorbing my time with the woman I love

D."

Totally agree with this

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

That’s very sad.

If it was me I’d want to ask her why is she saying that and tell her it’s really no big for me to stop, and if she said she still really wanted me to carry on and I believed her , and it felt ok and not like cheating, then I might do the odd one

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London


"We have been swinging for around 20 years. My wife is terminally ill and is struggling with sex and has told me to carry on going on meets and to clubs. We have always played together (same house or clubs occasionaly seperate rooms) I feel like this would be cheating even though she says she doesn't mind what should I do? "

A question no one can answer but you.

That said, personally, I'd want to spend as much time with my spouse as I could. The thought of losing them would kill my libido and make me sick, sad to the pit of my stomach.

We all deal with life's challenges differently: do what works for you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she gives her blessing and as no issues with it then it all comes down to how you feel.

And my best wishes go out to Mrs.

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By *oxychicWoman
over a year ago

Nottinghamshire

So sorry to hear about your wife .

Maybe your wife saying that so u keep enjoying your life.

Me personally I put swinging to one side and enjoy the time with her but only u can make that decision x

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By *parkle1974Woman
over a year ago

Leeds

So sorry to hear about your wife.

I know she has given you her blessing but in my opinion (for what it's worth) would be to focus your attention on her and enjoy each moment that is afforded to you both xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I would have thought that if your wife was terminally ill that you would want to spend every last minute with her and nobody else."

What I was gonna say. If my Mr was terminally ill then absolutely playing would probably Be at the very back of my mind x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally I dont think I could do it, even with permission. I think it's something you too need to decide more than us.

But like others have said, if it doesnt right, dont do it.

Hopefully in time you can both get back into it and experience what you've missed together

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