FabSwingers.com forum: Swingers humour

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I must have asked my ex-wife twenty or thirty times if she would be willing to experiment with swinging.

She finally said yes, but quickly changed her mind once I got the noose around her neck

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

After an argument Mel stormed upstairs and returned an hour later wearing a mini skirt resembling a pelmet and a tight boob tube with thigh high boots on. Phil asked where she was going and was told “Dogging! Don’t wait up!”

After Match of the Day Phil looked at the clock and smiled a smug grin knowing she’d be home soon and hadn’t actually gone dogging but to the pub. At 3 am he consoled himself that she’d be home soon as the local Indian restaurant had closed. He woke at 5:30am to the sound of Mel staggering in.

“Where the hell have you been?” he shouted

“I went dogging and found an absolute stud!” she answered

Tearful and hurt Phil stuttered, “Did he touch those amazing boobs you have?”

Mel answered “He fondled and groped and sucked these boobs til they were sore!”

“Did he touch that big soft curvy bum?” asked Phil

“He groped and squeezed and bit this bum til it ached” Mel laughed

“And…. and…what about that big hairy c*nt?” Phil asked sobbing

Mel stared at Phil and said “He never mentioned you once!”