FabSwingers.com forum: Ladies, have you ever wanted a penis?

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

And what would you do if you got one?

I really envy men the ability to just pee and go in almost any environment.

If I actually had one I think I’d spend the first few days just sticking it in random things, probably mainly food stuffs, to see how it felt.Work my way through the fridge.

And writing my name in piss. Like with a sparkler.

Anyone else?

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

I would do the same things as you

I would want to play with it a lot and watch how it responds to things/people

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, I would love to have sex with a woman using a penis not my tongue and fingers, I also want to know how the male orgasm compares to a womans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yep definitely the orgasm bit!

I’d also want to know what a BJ feels like haha

And of course helicopter daily!

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

That’s such a good idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

What a great idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hahai love Steve's

and Babs'

Just shows how males + female brain are wired

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Same as above. I'd probably come away understanding a little more why some men can't leave themselves alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it??

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I’d want a good foreskin so I could play with it and push rice crispies under it.

In private.

Probably..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Wank myself silly, windmill it and send unsolicited dick pics

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Same as above. I'd probably come away understanding a little more why some men can't leave themselves alone.

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

love this

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it?? "

There are Apps for that

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

"I’d want a good foreskin so I could play with it and push rice crispies under it.

In private.

Probably.."

You can get Maltesers under a really good one

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it??

There are Apps for that"

Maybe dog ears and whiskers would be more appealing

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I’d want a good foreskin so I could play with it and push rice crispies under it.

In private.

Probably..

You can get Maltesers under a really good one"

That’s my Wednesday night sorted..

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By *ayRosesWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I'd do the same - play with it, poke things with it, maybe do some dick-paintings...

And then hand it back

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By *moothdickMan
over a year ago

stoke

Ladies, u do know if u had a cock, it would reduce yr thinking capacity and make decisions for u

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

I'd like one and all of the above ideas would be on my to do list. Especially the glitter paint, that's a brilliant idea.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I’d want a good foreskin so I could play with it and push rice crispies under it.

In private.

Probably..

You can get Maltesers under a really good one

That’s my Wednesday night sorted.."

I'd like to eat that malteaser

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it?? "

It would make dick pics all the more interesting

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

Ladies you can borrow mine for the day if you like

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like one and all of the above ideas would be on my to do list. Especially the glitter paint, that's a brilliant idea."

I may change my profile from 'no dic pics' to '... Unless they have glitter paint on them'

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"Ladies you can borrow mine for the day if you like

Is that with or without the glitter?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it??

It would make dick pics all the more interesting

I might paint a butterfly on my vijay-ja

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it??

It would make dick pics all the more interesting

I might paint a butterfly on my vijay-ja

See if it attracts anything

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"I'd like one and all of the above ideas would be on my to do list. Especially the glitter paint, that's a brilliant idea.

I may change my profile from 'no dic pics' to '... Unless they have glitter paint on them'

It will be the new fab way, ditch the can of lynx and sky remote.... glitter paint and cock art

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Yep definitely the orgasm bit!

I’d also want to know what a BJ feels like haha

And of course helicopter daily!

"
was wondering how long helicopter would come up seem like womens favourite part lol

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By *nto My ArmsMan
over a year ago

Herts/London

Tying it into shapes like balloon modelling is the most fun...

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it??

It would make dick pics all the more interesting

I might paint a butterfly on my vijay-ja

See if it attracts anything

Haha I’m sure it would

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd like one and all of the above ideas would be on my to do list. Especially the glitter paint, that's a brilliant idea.

I may change my profile from 'no dic pics' to '... Unless they have glitter paint on them'

It will be the new fab way, ditch the can of lynx and sky remote.... glitter paint and cock art

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By *ionaScarletTV/TS
over a year ago

Dundee

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

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By *nto My ArmsMan
over a year ago

Herts/London

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it??

It would make dick pics all the more interesting

I might paint a butterfly on my vijay-ja

See if it attracts anything

A hungry caterpillar...

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

King's Crustacean

I always wanted one when I was younger. I used to thrust a lot and got worried that maybe I was a bloke....... Duh .....kids hey.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

I know! I feel like I've found a gap in the market.. Maybe I'll have a stall at MLS and offer to paint all the dics

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

"I'd like one and all of the above ideas would be on my to do list. Especially the glitter paint, that's a brilliant idea.

I may change my profile from 'no dic pics' to '... Unless they have glitter paint on them'

That's a great idea. Dresses them up a little

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it??

It would make dick pics all the more interesting

I might paint a butterfly on my vijay-ja

See if it attracts anything

A hungry caterpillar... "

Oooo..

Creative

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

I know! I feel like I've found a gap in the market.. Maybe I'll have a stall at MLS and offer to paint all the dics

Typical, the first MLS I miss and there's dick painting

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

I've never wanted a penis, but I do wonder sometimes if I was born with a penis how big would it have been lol

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

I know! I feel like I've found a gap in the market.. Maybe I'll have a stall at MLS and offer to paint all the dics

You’d definitely have a queue. Can you make it edible paint and glitter

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By *irth.Minge.FireMan
over a year ago

Seen in far off places

In a similar vein, I'd definitely like to know how it feels to have a vag

I would want to try sitting on a washing mac_ine on full spin...

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

"In a similar vein, I'd definitely like to know how it feels to have a vag

I would want to try sitting on a washing mac_ine on full spin..."

I have no interest in having a vagina, I just want the boobs for a bit.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

I know! I feel like I've found a gap in the market.. Maybe I'll have a stall at MLS and offer to paint all the dics

You’d definitely have a queue. Can you make it edible paint and glitter

Ooo i will Google lol!! Imagine :D

I might be struck off MLS guestlist lol

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

I know! I feel like I've found a gap in the market.. Maybe I'll have a stall at MLS and offer to paint all the dics

Typical, the first MLS I miss and there's dick painting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In a similar vein, I'd definitely like to know how it feels to have a vag

I would want to try sitting on a washing mac_ine on full spin...

I have no interest in having a vagina, I just want the boobs for a bit."

Boobs are amazing.. I stroke mine a lot, especially at work.. They are so soft and warm

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

I know! I feel like I've found a gap in the market.. Maybe I'll have a stall at MLS and offer to paint all the dics

You’d definitely have a queue. Can you make it edible paint and glitter

Ooo i will Google lol!! Imagine :D

I might be struck off MLS guestlist lol

Erm yes maybe.... have to make it a side thing, pre MLS art

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By *ex HolesMan
over a year ago

Up North

"Ladies you can borrow mine for the day if you like

Is that with or without the glitter?

I was going to say something crude like it shoots glitter so I won’t

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

"Ladies you can borrow mine for the day if you like

Is that with or without the glitter?

I was going to say something crude like it shoots glitter so I won’t

Phew! Nearly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Would love one for a day....

I would take loads of pictures from all angles, then send them to all you ladies with a copy and paste "wanna fuck now?"

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

"In a similar vein, I'd definitely like to know how it feels to have a vag

I would want to try sitting on a washing mac_ine on full spin...

I have no interest in having a vagina, I just want the boobs for a bit.

Boobs are amazing.. I stroke mine a lot, especially at work.. They are so soft and warm

Are you a Nurse? Or a French Maid? Just trying to paint a picture.

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

If I had Boobs and a fanny I would never leave the house, I would be to busy playing the "Will it fit" game. Xx

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By *etite_delightWoman
over a year ago

BunnyLand

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it?? "

Can’t go wrong with a little cute heart on them, I’m with you on this :D

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If I had Boobs and a fanny I would never leave the house, I would be to busy playing the "Will it fit" game. Xx "

It often doesn't let me tell you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"In a similar vein, I'd definitely like to know how it feels to have a vag

I would want to try sitting on a washing mac_ine on full spin...

I have no interest in having a vagina, I just want the boobs for a bit.

Boobs are amazing.. I stroke mine a lot, especially at work.. They are so soft and warm

Are you a Nurse? Or a French Maid? Just trying to paint a picture."

I'm a prison warden... Spend my time doing lot of strip searches

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By *hloevtTV/TS
over a year ago

norwich

If got "WENDY" tattooed on mine ! When it's hard it says "welcome to huntingdon have a nice day" xx

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By *urvyandCurious999Woman
over a year ago

Hiding from twats

I'm fairly accident prone, so the first thing I'd probably do if I had a penis is get it caught in the zip of my jeans, so I'll give it a miss I think

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think I might have done a lot better at school if I didn’t have one to hand....all things considered....but then again think of all the things I would have missed out on

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"I'd love one.. I'd probably get some glitter and body paint to make it a little prettier

I can't believe I've never thought of doing this!!

I know! I feel like I've found a gap in the market.. Maybe I'll have a stall at MLS and offer to paint all the dics

Some of the Dicks need painting

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"If got "WENDY" tattooed on mine ! When it's hard it says "welcome to huntingdon have a nice day" xx "

I would like to see that

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And what would you do if you got one?

I really envy men the ability to just pee and go in almost any environment.

If I actually had one I think I’d spend the first few days just sticking it in random things, probably mainly food stuffs, to see how it felt.Work my way through the fridge.

And writing my name in piss. Like with a sparkler.

Anyone else?"

And there are the likes of me wishing I didn't have one x

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"And what would you do if you got one?

I really envy men the ability to just pee and go in almost any environment.

If I actually had one I think I’d spend the first few days just sticking it in random things, probably mainly food stuffs, to see how it felt.Work my way through the fridge.

And writing my name in piss. Like with a sparkler.

Anyone else?"

Would you let me grab some lunch before you start on the fridge?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And what would you do if you got one?

I really envy men the ability to just pee and go in almost any environment.

If I actually had one I think I’d spend the first few days just sticking it in random things, probably mainly food stuffs, to see how it felt.Work my way through the fridge.

And writing my name in piss. Like with a sparkler.

Anyone else?

And there are the likes of me wishing I didn't have one x "

The multicoloured nature of fab is one of its joys. My wanting to experiment with one doesn’t in any way reflect on your desire not to have one. Maybe start a ‘what would you do if you had a fanny?’ thread?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"And what would you do if you got one?

I really envy men the ability to just pee and go in almost any environment.

If I actually had one I think I’d spend the first few days just sticking it in random things, probably mainly food stuffs, to see how it felt.Work my way through the fridge.

And writing my name in piss. Like with a sparkler.

Anyone else?

Would you let me grab some lunch before you start on the fridge? "

Be quick, I can feel it pulling me to the hummus..

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

"And what would you do if you got one?

I really envy men the ability to just pee and go in almost any environment.

If I actually had one I think I’d spend the first few days just sticking it in random things, probably mainly food stuffs, to see how it felt.Work my way through the fridge.

And writing my name in piss. Like with a sparkler.

Anyone else?

Would you let me grab some lunch before you start on the fridge?

Be quick, I can feel it pulling me to the hummus.."

I'm going to use a knife to spread the houmous on the pitta bread if you don't mind.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Been there.

Done that

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Been there.

Done that

Mic drop..

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By *rightonsteveMan
over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"If got "WENDY" tattooed on mine ! When it's hard it says "welcome to huntingdon have a nice day" xx "

Haha!

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By *ineMan
over a year ago

In cave behind a waterfall on a hill

Ladies find it hard to get a penis.....

Really

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By *rghYeTimbersMan
over a year ago

Ipswich

"Seriously guys... Why don't you paint some cute hearts and a butterfly on it?? "

I can see a whole new trend in fab photos developing...

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By *UNANDNICEMan
over a year ago

Basildon

You ladies can have my one if you want..LOL

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Been there.

Done that

Mic drop.."

What?

I didn’t like it

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By *emma HoldenTV/TS
over a year ago

Ramsey

We're probably all fascinated by what we don't have. Some women wonder what having a cock would be like & of course guys are utterly fascinated by boobs cos we have nowhere on our bodies that is comparable for softness & bounce lol. Nature's curiosity that ensures the species attracts to each other & life goes on. X

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If I got one I'd want to keep it and never have a another period.

Id moan about how pathetic sanitary products adverts and tena lady adverts are just so annoying.

Moan about how I can never get any pussy.

Wank

Helicopters

Experience the male orgasm

Pee outside

Train myself to last for ages etc.

Try not to be freaked out by waking up with a body part hard as hell each morning.

And if I had the opportunity dig it in someone elses bum cheek for once!

The malteasers sounds amusing too.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Any lady that wants to handle mine for a while can message me.

I'll see if I can help.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh and I'd also NOT pee on the toilet seat or drip on the floor!

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By *ottielayWoman
over a year ago

by the bay

"Any lady that wants to handle mine for a while can message me.

I'll see if I can help.

Chunkys penile-handling service is available

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By *emma HoldenTV/TS
over a year ago

Ramsey

It's not all fun. At teenage you can take great amusement in pissing 6ft up a wall. By the time you reach my age, so long as your missing your shoes you've had a good day lol.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"Any lady that wants to handle mine for a while can message me.

I'll see if I can help.

Chunkys penile-handling service is available

Now why didn't I think of that? Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"And what would you do if you got one?

I really envy men the ability to just pee and go in almost any environment.

If I actually had one I think I’d spend the first few days just sticking it in random things, probably mainly food stuffs, to see how it felt.Work my way through the fridge.

And writing my name in piss. Like with a sparkler.

Anyone else?"

Oh yes I'd never go out and I can retire BOB. I'd love to stick it in a trifle see how it feels and swirl it all about!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No, I’d be worried about having erections at embarrassing times

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"No, I’d be worried about having erections at embarrassing times

Tight undies is the key.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Duct tape can be a bit messy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No, I’d be worried about having erections at embarrassing times

True, it’s a bit different to having a hard nipple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No.

Well except when I want lots of sex but it has to come with that bit of skin on the end...

What's it called?

Oh yes, A MAN!

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

A straight mans worse nightmare is finding out a lady does have a penis!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"No.

Well except when I want lots of sex but it has to come with that bit of skin on the end...

What's it called?

Oh yes, A MAN!

And hopefully a brain.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'd get my deodorant spray and measure it photograph it and post on here..

Just has to be done

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

"I'd get my deodorant spray and measure it photograph it and post on here..

Just has to be done"

Hahaha

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I'd get my deodorant spray and measure it photograph it and post on here..

Just has to be done"

Can you then change your name to 'Right Guard'

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

"I'd get my deodorant spray and measure it photograph it and post on here..

Just has to be done

Can you then change your name to 'Right Guard'"

I think she may need a guard from you

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I'd get my deodorant spray and measure it photograph it and post on here..

Just has to be done

Can you then change your name to 'Right Guard'

I think she may need a guard from you"

MEEEE? I'm adorable. Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'd get my deodorant spray and measure it photograph it and post on here..

Just has to be done

Can you then change your name to 'Right Guard'

I think she may need a guard from you"

Ohh I'd be.. lynx

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Pee standing up yes. A penis, no

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

"I'd get my deodorant spray and measure it photograph it and post on here..

Just has to be done

Can you then change your name to 'Right Guard'

I think she may need a guard from you

Ohh I'd be.. lynx"

Wild and untamed?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pee standing up yes. A penis, no"

I pee standing up in the shower

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

"Pee standing up yes. A penis, no

I pee standing up in the shower

I pee standing up in the shower when someone is on their knees in front of me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Pee standing up yes. A penis, no

I pee standing up in the shower

I pee standing up in the shower when someone is on their knees in front of me"

Oh boy

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"No.

Well except when I want lots of sex but it has to come with that bit of skin on the end...

What's it called?

Oh yes, A MAN!

And hopefully a brain. "

They "shouldnt" be mutually exclusive!

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"No.

Well except when I want lots of sex but it has to come with that bit of skin on the end...

What's it called?

Oh yes, A MAN!

And hopefully a brain.

They "shouldnt" be mutually exclusive!"

No, but a few guys on here make you question that. Lol

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