FabSwingers.com forum: Coffee! I need coffee!!!

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Why is coffee not on the base of Maslow's hierarchy of needs?

I don't event trust people who don't crave coffee! That's how you can spot an alien....

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

I don't get the whole coffee thing, I must be an untrustworthy alien.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't get the whole coffee thing, I must be an untrustworthy alien."

Me either. I like a nice coffee but I never NEED one.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Alien here

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By *ick_and_BickerCouple
over a year ago

Nottingham

It’s a food group all on its own.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Always my third need each morning after a piss then a wank

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

Coffee is no longer cutting it and I don’t know where to go from here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't get the whole coffee thing, I must be an untrustworthy alien."

Should we take you to our leader? He looks a bit like an alien too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't get the whole coffee thing, I must be an untrustworthy alien.

Me either. I like a nice coffee but I never NEED one. "

I never NEED one. I CRAVE one. Would kill for one. In fact...

Not saying anything further without my lawyer present.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Too much blood in caffeine stream

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"It’s a food group all on its own. "

Thank you. Someone gets it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A nice cup of tea, that is the answer.

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead

I am weening myself off it now. Too much need for it.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Alien here "

Instant block

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By *ablo minibar123Woman
over a year ago

Now what's wrong with a nice cup of tea?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Always my third need each morning after a piss then a wank

Your 5 a day sounds different to mine....

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By *rAngleseyMan
over a year ago

Anglesey

Coffee is the fuel of the future & Aliens love it, That`s why they visit us.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Coffee is no longer cutting it and I don’t know where to go from here. "

Espresso. It's a gateway drug to other hardcore beverages macchiato Lates etc....

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Coffee is threatened by climate change. Save the planet!

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

"Coffee is no longer cutting it and I don’t know where to go from here.

Espresso. It's a gateway drug to other hardcore beverages macchiato Lates etc...."

My work coffee is a double espresso let down with some hot water.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Too much blood in caffeine stream"

Sounds like you need a transfusion from my Nespressoliser...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Too much blood in caffeine stream

Sounds like you need a transfusion from my Nespressoliser..."

Noooo. Proper coffee

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I am weening myself off it now. Too much need for it. "

It's your body telling you what it needs! Listen to your body!

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By *uesdaysfundayCouple
over a year ago

Sandbach

"Why is coffee not on the base of Maslow's hierarchy of needs?

I don't event trust people who don't crave coffee! That's how you can spot an alien...."

Totally agree, whilst you are there I take mine black xxx

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By *hatYorkLadMan
over a year ago

York

I don't drink it often, gives you teacher breath!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Too much blood in caffeine stream

Sounds like you need a transfusion from my Nespressoliser...

Noooo. Proper coffee

Blasphemy!!! Blocking you too

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why is coffee not on the base of Maslow's hierarchy of needs?

I don't event trust people who don't crave coffee! That's how you can spot an alien....

Totally agree, whilst you are there I take mine black xxx

Living proof that drop dead gorgeous non-aliens drink coffee!

Hit me up on kik sexy

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Too much blood in caffeine stream

Sounds like you need a transfusion from my Nespressoliser...

Noooo. Proper coffee

Blasphemy!!! Blocking you too

Freshly ground, roasted within a fortnight, made by hand. None of this pod nonsense.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Coffee is no longer cutting it and I don’t know where to go from here.

Espresso. It's a gateway drug to other hardcore beverages macchiato Lates etc....

My work coffee is a double espresso let down with some hot water. "

I'm not going to lie. I got a bit turned on by that passage of erotica.....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Too much blood in caffeine stream

Sounds like you need a transfusion from my Nespressoliser...

Noooo. Proper coffee

Blasphemy!!! Blocking you too

Freshly ground, roasted within a fortnight, made by hand. None of this pod nonsense."

Ok unblocked.

Marry me!!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don't get the whole coffee thing, I must be an untrustworthy alien.

Me either. I like a nice coffee but I never NEED one. "
i always need one but not a coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I don't drink it often, gives you teacher breath!"

Breathmints. Good for those worktime passage cuddles.

Don't use breathmints if your boss gets too in your face. Stale coffee and brown teeth triggers instinctive counter predatory responses. Can be used a defensive known as Skunk mechanism.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Now what's wrong with a nice cup of tea?"

This^^^

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I neeeeed coffee in the mornings. Absolutely detest tea

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By *orthantsblueeyesMan
over a year ago

Northampton

I'm trying fruit tea at work instead today

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm trying fruit tea at work instead today

Smell nice but taste like dishwater. Good luck...

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

"I'm trying fruit tea at work instead today

I have to go herbal in an afternoon or I’m wired all night. Some are better than others. Worth persevering.

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By *averockrockMan
over a year ago

swindon

coffee is best person's friend! can't live without it! lol

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Now what's wrong with a nice cup of tea?

This^^^"

Tea is good. I drink a special brand called Rooibos which cures every ailment known to man. Tastes great and lovely drink just before going to bed.

Waking up....

DON'T talking to me until I've had my coffee. My words slur. My eyes won't open properly and my feet shaffle like I'm in manacles....

(See trancelike state)

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I neeeeed coffee in the mornings. Absolutely detest tea

Spoken like a genuine human. Not that an alien could have such a perfect bottom anyway...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm trying fruit tea at work instead today

At work...? Or on your way up to the mothership?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm trying fruit tea at work instead today

I have to go herbal in an afternoon or I’m wired all night. Some are better than others. Worth persevering. "

Herbal herbal or 'herbal' the mods are watching 'herbal'?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Off to put the kettle on....

Instant or Columbian hand ground anyone?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"coffee is best person's friend! can't live without it! lol"

See. Can't drink a dog or diamonds. Coffee. Man's best friend. Aliens can't stand the stuff.

#CoffeeAlienLitmusTest

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No coffee no good and don’t be giving me none of that instant shit ,don’t matter how you dress up instant ,it’s shit !

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob"

#GuiltyAsChargedAndProudOfIt

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob

#GuiltyAsChargedAndProudOfIt"

I meh at Nespresso too

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"No coffee no good and don’t be giving me none of that instant shit ,don’t matter how you dress up instant ,it’s shit !

I own instant. It's like an emergency for when my Nespresso bulk buy pods run out. Not going to happen unless theres a zombie apocalypse.

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

"I'm trying fruit tea at work instead today

I have to go herbal in an afternoon or I’m wired all night. Some are better than others. Worth persevering.

Herbal herbal or 'herbal' the mods are watching 'herbal'?"

Fruit or peppermint or liquorice or “peace” hemp and mint and some Indian thing (ashgwarma?) I don’t even know what it is.

I quite like the berry ones. Either way they all need honey or they taste like an ashtray.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob

#GuiltyAsChargedAndProudOfIt

I meh at Nespresso too"

I'm building myself up... but looking to find a girl with the real McCoy... then I'll know she's 'the one' ..... glass slippers are so old fashioned

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob

#GuiltyAsChargedAndProudOfIt"

Trouble is if I have coffee after 5pm I’m up all night can’t sleep lol but it’s just so tempting

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm trying fruit tea at work instead today

I have to go herbal in an afternoon or I’m wired all night. Some are better than others. Worth persevering.

Herbal herbal or 'herbal' the mods are watching 'herbal'?

Fruit or peppermint or liquorice or “peace” hemp and mint and some Indian thing (ashgwarma?) I don’t even know what it is.

I quite like the berry ones. Either way they all need honey or they taste like an ashtray. "

If you find it takes you on a spiritual journey and the secrets of life are revealed to you in a very realistic dream..... you might want to re-read what's on the contents label....

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By *otsossieMan
over a year ago

Chesterfield

I keep hoping, but that never seems to happen.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob

#GuiltyAsChargedAndProudOfIt

Trouble is if I have coffee after 5pm I’m up all night can’t sleep lol but it’s just so tempting

I have insomnia. I'm up all night anyway. When I wake up I feel like I may actually be dead and trapped inside my corpse. ....until..... that First Hit of coffee!!! Then I'm like a kid on a playground...

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

I stop drinking coffee around lunchtime for my insomnia

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob

#GuiltyAsChargedAndProudOfIt

Trouble is if I have coffee after 5pm I’m up all night can’t sleep lol but it’s just so tempting

You need to get a bean to cup machine then lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I stop drinking coffee around lunchtime for my insomnia"
it’s okay if you have something worth being awake all night for

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yup my sleep is naffed

First thing large espresso

Then a takeout cappuccino large in a thermos mug for the drive/fight to work

Arrive flying lol

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I stop drinking coffee around lunchtime for my insomnia it’s okay if you have something worth being awake all night for

That's exceedingly rare and I need to function.

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By *ntrepid ExplorersCouple
over a year ago

Birmingham

"I stop drinking coffee around lunchtime for my insomnia it’s okay if you have something worth being awake all night for

That's exceedingly rare and I need to function."

I did have a latte this morning (well, two spoons of decent instant coffee in a mug of milk counts...?), but generally all that caffeine can go fuck itself. So glad when I moved from regular tea to Redbush. Once the withdrawal headaches stopped in the evenings, I feel so much more awake all day.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Got my own bean to cup coffee machine love it can’t eat the smell first thing in the morning

I never understood penis envy.

But coffee maker envy I get. I just want to be you right now!

Meh

#coffeesnob

#GuiltyAsChargedAndProudOfIt

Trouble is if I have coffee after 5pm I’m up all night can’t sleep lol but it’s just so tempting

You need to get a bean to cup machine then lol "

Worried I might start eating the beans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Ah coffee, the elixir of life, followed closely but red wine.

Rehab here I come

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"I stop drinking coffee around lunchtime for my insomnia it’s okay if you have something worth being awake all night for

That's exceedingly rare and I need to function.

I enjoy coffee and won't be giving it up, but I definitely taper it off.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Bean to cup machines and pods make coffee snob Swing cry

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By *BootyfulDayWoman
over a year ago

…

Oh dear alien here!

Don't like coffee or tea...will have a cheeky hot chocolate with marshmallows and cream though

such a kid haha!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Bean to cup machines and pods make coffee snob Swing cry "

I think I love you....

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I am NOT a coffee addict!!! I can give up any time I want. There's just no wat I'd ever want to stop. Life would be meaningless...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh dear alien here!

Don't like coffee or tea...will have a cheeky hot chocolate with marshmallows and cream though

such a kid haha!

It's ok we won't 'out' you. Your friends can still respect you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Programming: A process where coffee is input and code is the result.

If the coffee machine breaks in a software development company it has more impact than a power failure!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

And the problem is......?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

And the problem is......?"

Struggling to think of anything

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 14/01/20 12:49:05]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

And the problem is......?

Struggling to think of anything

Well I have had my morning cups (yes the plural is intentional) of coffee and for just the briefest of moments was focused on my work.

Then I looked at your profile pics. Distracted beyond all cognitive thought...

Public warning: Do NOT look at this couples private pics if you want to be able to think straight afterwards. Phew! Golly talk about a new addiction.

I'm asking you guys to block me for my own good so I get some work done today!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I stop drinking coffee around lunchtime for my insomnia it’s okay if you have something worth being awake all night for

That's exceedingly rare and I need to function.

Ermmmmmm red bush Devine love the taste as you sip run your tounge over it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

( running noise) did someone say coffee

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Why is coffee not on the base of Maslow's hierarchy of needs?

I agree, it should be, along with chocolate and sex.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

And the problem is......?

Struggling to think of anything

Well I have had my morning cups (yes the plural is intentional) of coffee and for just the briefest of moments was focused on my work.

Then I looked at your profile pics. Distracted beyond all cognitive thought...

Public warning: Do NOT look at this couples private pics if you want to be able to think straight afterwards. Phew! Golly talk about a new addiction.

I'm asking you guys to block me for my own good so I get some work done today!

Haha thanks, not blocking though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Why is coffee not on the base of Maslow's hierarchy of needs?

I agree, it should be, along with chocolate and sex.

Sex and chocolate aren't there either? Time to get my sharpie out. If Trump can do it I can do it!

Ok. So I crossed out clothing, replaced it with coffee.

Crossed out reproduction and wtore sex.

Crossed out food. Put chocolate (potato/potato).

Crossed out sleep. It's now spelt 'party'

Looks much more realistic now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

And the problem is......?

Struggling to think of anything

Well I have had my morning cups (yes the plural is intentional) of coffee and for just the briefest of moments was focused on my work.

Then I looked at your profile pics. Distracted beyond all cognitive thought...

Public warning: Do NOT look at this couples private pics if you want to be able to think straight afterwards. Phew! Golly talk about a new addiction.

I'm asking you guys to block me for my own good so I get some work done today!

Haha thanks, not blocking though

Thank you! My finger hovered over the delete this message for the longest time....

I can stop hating myself now...

Hear that plummeting sound? It's my productivity....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

And the problem is......?

Struggling to think of anything

Well I have had my morning cups (yes the plural is intentional) of coffee and for just the briefest of moments was focused on my work.

Then I looked at your profile pics. Distracted beyond all cognitive thought...

Public warning: Do NOT look at this couples private pics if you want to be able to think straight afterwards. Phew! Golly talk about a new addiction.

I'm asking you guys to block me for my own good so I get some work done today!

Haha thanks, not blocking though

Definitely wouldn’t block you I could spend 24 hrs working on you opps with you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Minimum 2 cups of strong coffee needed everyday otherwise its massive headaches.... Addicted? Hehe probably

And the problem is......?

Struggling to think of anything

Well I have had my morning cups (yes the plural is intentional) of coffee and for just the briefest of moments was focused on my work.

Then I looked at your profile pics. Distracted beyond all cognitive thought...

Public warning: Do NOT look at this couples private pics if you want to be able to think straight afterwards. Phew! Golly talk about a new addiction.

I'm asking you guys to block me for my own good so I get some work done today!

Haha thanks, not blocking though

Definitely wouldn’t block you I could spend 24 hrs working on you opps with you

Pull in. Got an extra chair and a 3 year stockpile of nespresso capsules and pringles...

There's a bit at the top that says "Stack + Snap + Share = win tasty prizes". I'd swear this was about swinging if it weren't for the "snap" bit....

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