FabSwingers.com forum: Ways that you're immature

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I like to think of myself as a shining paragon of maturity, but though I'm 40, I still get urges to knock on people's doors and run away. Also, "your mum" jokes still crease me up on the inside. Oh, and when I see Cockburns port, I chuckle.

How are you still immature?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When out shopping can’t resist putting on a hat, any hate my wife gets well embarrassed sometimes.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm far too impulsive and still believe cereal is an acceptable dinner.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I watch cartoons and draw cartoon characters

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

There was a "Cockwell Inn" pub round ours always had a chuckle at that.

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By *ayRosesWoman
over a year ago

Edinburgh

I have been known to reply to emails with "yer da sells avon"

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

Still think I'm getting up to go to school most days

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Everything is still an innuendo.

Toilet humour is still the best.

Cereal for dinner is acceptable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I set off all the "try me" toys in shops

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There was a "Cockwell Inn" pub round ours always had a chuckle at that."

In Northampton there's a pub called "the cock". I always grin when I drive past. Always.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I set off all the "try me" toys in shops"

But - that's a must.... Isn't it?

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By *orraine999Woman
over a year ago

Somewhere

"I set off all the "try me" toys in shops

But - that's a must.... Isn't it? "

Was that you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

When I'm in a toilet cubicle, and somebody walks in and breaks wind, I'll be trying so hard to hold it together, and been known to have tears streaming down my face. I can't help it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I all Laugh when I say to my customer. Ballcock not Staying up

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

[Removed by poster at 12/01/20 23:48:00]

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

I don’t go home on a night out until the place I’m in closes.... must learn my age haha

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like to move things with letters on in shops so they spell out rude words

. On and at Christmas set off every moving Santa

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I set off all the "try me" toys in shops

But - that's a must.... Isn't it?

Was that you?

Shhh. Only the nosey ones.

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By *uke OzadeMan
over a year ago

Ho Chi Minge City

"I like to move things with letters on in shops so they spell out rude words

. On and at Christmas set off every moving Santa

Spice aisle

I do that regularly

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was a "Cockwell Inn" pub round ours always had a chuckle at that.

In Northampton there's a pub called "the cock". I always grin when I drive past. Always. "

The first time I visited a friend in Wollaston and my satnav said Bell End at the top I was pitifully amused.

I also find the whole subject of wanking and porn hilarious and I insist on putting my bf's nutsack in my mouth after he's just shaved it because I love how much it feels like flumps

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

I still say ‘well yah boo sucks to you’

when I’m loosing an argument.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There was a "Cockwell Inn" pub round ours always had a chuckle at that.

In Northampton there's a pub called "the cock". I always grin when I drive past. Always.

The first time I visited a friend in Wollaston and my satnav said Bell End at the top I was pitifully amused.

I also find the whole subject of wanking and porn hilarious and I insist on putting my bf's nutsack in my mouth after he's just shaved it because I love how much it feels like flumps

I think there's a street in Wollaston called "Titty Ho" as well. Always makes me laugh.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I'm in a toilet cubicle, and somebody walks in and breaks wind, I'll be trying so hard to hold it together, and been known to have tears streaming down my face. I can't help it. "

You and I are FAR too similar.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There was a "Cockwell Inn" pub round ours always had a chuckle at that.

In Northampton there's a pub called "the cock". I always grin when I drive past. Always.

The first time I visited a friend in Wollaston and my satnav said Bell End at the top I was pitifully amused.

I also find the whole subject of wanking and porn hilarious and I insist on putting my bf's nutsack in my mouth after he's just shaved it because I love how much it feels like flumps

I think there's a street in Wollaston called "Titty Ho" as well. Always makes me laugh. "

There's also Back Way. I think it's clear some town planner had a zoot one lunchtime

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My boobs are only a couple of years old and still developing.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There's also Back Way. I think it's clear some town planner had a zoot one lunchtime

Remember the sign outside the family planning clinic? It said "Use rear entrance". It's on google images somewhere. That always made me laugh like a teenager.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's also Back Way. I think it's clear some town planner had a zoot one lunchtime

Remember the sign outside the family planning clinic? It said "Use rear entrance". It's on google images somewhere. That always made me laugh like a teenager. "

And how the Bants Lane sign always got changed to Pants Lane?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"There's also Back Way. I think it's clear some town planner had a zoot one lunchtime

Remember the sign outside the family planning clinic? It said "Use rear entrance". It's on google images somewhere. That always made me laugh like a teenager.

And how the Bants Lane sign always got changed to Pants Lane?

Me and 2 mates did that once, and it made the front page of the Chronicle. That's my claim to fame in this town.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I like to move things with letters on in shops so they spell out rude words

. On and at Christmas set off every moving Santa

Or creating rude words on those sequin cushions

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port

I put random items into other people's shopping trolleys at supermarkets

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Used to be some punk promoters in Camden who's flyers said "Your Mum presents..."

Top work I thought.

Also "My Friend Billy..." is still hilarious to the day.

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

Cute, loved reading these.

I'm such a dick at parties .. I'm always the one that gets everyone to play stupid games or get everyone massaging each other's feet or swapping clothes or blindfold guess the ingredients to an unsual food combo etc etc.

You'll love me or hate me at your party

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

Someone honking my boobs still makes me laugh and I hope always will.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I put random items into other people's shopping trolleys at supermarkets

x "

Do you actually?! For real? I love that...

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Used to be some punk promoters in Camden who's flyers said "Your Mum presents..."

I'm laughing out loud!

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

"I put random items into other people's shopping trolleys at supermarkets

x "

Quality minxy behaviour.. love it!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I still write the word 5318008 on a calculator

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port

"I put random items into other people's shopping trolleys at supermarkets

Do you actually?! For real? I love that...

I do yes, when I'm feeling mischievous

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I put random items into other people's shopping trolleys at supermarkets

Do you actually?! For real? I love that...

I do yes, when I'm feeling mischievous

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

I play music too loud according to my kids

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I play music too loud according to my kids

Do you 'blow raspberries' back to them when they say it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm not, its just not in me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm not, its just not in me

I see what you did there.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I wave at people i don’t know so they’ll wave back and wonder who the hell it was.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I wave at people i don’t know so they’ll wave back and wonder who the hell it was."
i know i waved back

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By *reya73Woman
over a year ago

Whitley Bay

"I play music too loud according to my kids

Do you 'blow raspberries' back to them when they say it? "

I dance more and they hate it. Next time in the car, I will blow a raspberry!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I'm not, its just not in me

I see what you did there. "

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I wave at people i don’t know so they’ll wave back and wonder who the hell it was."

Especially when in a strange town.

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Stockport

I move ornaments round in peoples homes to see how long it takes them to notice!

Mrs J

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cockfosters, Pratts Bottom and Bat and Ball are all hilarious names for towns... what were they thinking?

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port

This is the most immature of all. Bear with me, when I was on here with my ex wife as HotnSpicey two guys let us down. So we arranged later to meet them on Ainsdale beach in Southport. We got their car reg numbers and pretended each of them was us. So they both turned up as single guys and drove round and round each other as single guys while we sat back and watched them laughing our heads off. True story x

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

"I play music too loud according to my kids

Do you 'blow raspberries' back to them when they say it?

I dance more and they hate it. Next time in the car, I will blow a raspberry!

PM me after you do. I'll have a giggle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I rely on my passions a little too much makes me volatile i should have been italian or a red head or really short

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port

"I move ornaments round in peoples homes to see how long it takes them to notice!

Mrs J "

Ha! I've done this too

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By *rchid0103Woman
over a year ago

Southport

Went for a spa day and giggled when the next treatment was a facial

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Used to be some punk promoters in Camden who's flyers said "Your Mum presents..."

Top work I thought.

Also "My Friend Billy..." is still hilarious to the day."

I love that

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By *heekyFlirtyCoupleCouple
over a year ago

Stockport

"I move ornaments round in peoples homes to see how long it takes them to notice!

Mrs J

Ha! I've done this too

Wish I was brave enough to pop things in people’s trolleys, I’d be caught out though as I’d follow them to see what happened at checkout!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's also Back Way. I think it's clear some town planner had a zoot one lunchtime

Remember the sign outside the family planning clinic? It said "Use rear entrance". It's on google images somewhere. That always made me laugh like a teenager.

And how the Bants Lane sign always got changed to Pants Lane?

Me and 2 mates did that once, and it made the front page of the Chronicle. That's my claim to fame in this town. "

Good work, my friend

some kids once burnt a cock and balls into their school lawn with killer and the Google earth cameras picked it up

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's also Back Way. I think it's clear some town planner had a zoot one lunchtime

Remember the sign outside the family planning clinic? It said "Use rear entrance". It's on google images somewhere. That always made me laugh like a teenager.

And how the Bants Lane sign always got changed to Pants Lane?

Me and 2 mates did that once, and it made the front page of the Chronicle. That's my claim to fame in this town.

Good work, my friend

some kids once burnt a cock and balls into their school lawn with killer and the Google earth cameras picked it up

That's actually beautiful

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Sat kids down for Christmas meal at a Christmas table mock up in posh ish garden centre. The looks of disapproval were delicious.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"There's also Back Way. I think it's clear some town planner had a zoot one lunchtime

Remember the sign outside the family planning clinic? It said "Use rear entrance". It's on google images somewhere. That always made me laugh like a teenager.

And how the Bants Lane sign always got changed to Pants Lane?

Me and 2 mates did that once, and it made the front page of the Chronicle. That's my claim to fame in this town.

Good work, my friend

some kids once burnt a cock and balls into their school lawn with killer and the Google earth cameras picked it up

That's actually beautiful

I won't lie, I'd have been proud

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

One of my mates has a very prudish mother. Not so long ago she was at his house, and he doesn't really pussyfoot around her. He was showing me how his Alexa worked, and said "Alexa, make farting noises".

Well, the stern and awkward look of disapproval on his mum's face combined with a barrage of flatulence noises from behind her was too much for me. And I had to leave the room.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm guilty of setting off musical toys

I'm guilty of arranging things with letters on into rude words

IV also rode a kiddies bike around toys are us

And lay down in a display bed

I'm going to start slipping items into other people's trolleys when I go shopping

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When out shopping can’t resist putting on a hat, any hate my wife gets well embarrassed sometimes. "

HAha that’s two of us

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"One of my mates has a very prudish mother. Not so long ago she was at his house, and he doesn't really pussyfoot around her. He was showing me how his Alexa worked, and said "Alexa, make farting noises".

Well, the stern and awkward look of disapproval on his mum's face combined with a barrage of flatulence noises from behind her was too much for me. And I had to leave the room."

See, now, this is very funny...

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By *inky SpiceWoman
over a year ago

Glasgow

Cuddly toys...I just can't stop!

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

I turn into a ten year whenever I hear the train announcement for Effingham Junction and giggle when the other half says "pull my finger"...I do, and he farts.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Im very very impulsive, I do need to curb it sometimes

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Like to throw in the odd ‘chinny beard’ when someone tells a story

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

Also can anyone be productive in the opticians? My fave reason for having children is that they join in with the old “omg. These are ugly.... TRY THEM ONNNNNNN” game

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By *rHotNottsMan
over a year ago

Dubai & Nottingham

We can be very childish for late forties... Mrs loves to the word Cock inappropriately like telling everyone say “Cock” when out and taking a photo with family/friends. I always touch things I’m not meant to and flirt outrageously. Sometimes if we have a little row out, for revenge Mrs will pretend to have special needs n the middle a city and I’ll be like so embarrassed but also pissing myself laughing....

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

I still find farts as amusing as when I was a child

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I still find farts as amusing as when I was a child

Me too! When asked who farted the other day, my daughter replied that it wasn't mum because she'd have giggled!

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By *orthantsblueeyesMan
over a year ago

Northampton

You're immature

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I still find farts as amusing as when I was a child

Can't remember who said it, might have been Jack Dee. But basically it's God's joke, he had first pick so obviously it's the funniest thing of all time. However... Etiquette requires that you do offer an exclamation appropriate to the situation when someone "breaks company". Depending on where and whom this can be anything from "one nil to you" to "fuck me, that one wore hobnail boots"

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By *ooking4othersMan
over a year ago

Here ...

I like set reminders for people on their connected devices when they are not there ... particularly of my birthday

I do set other random things e.g play a scary tune at 1am etc

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I still find farts as amusing as when I was a child

I like to say "get out and walk, I ain't carrying you no more"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I still find farts as amusing as when I was a child

Me too! When asked who farted the other day, my daughter replied that it wasn't mum because she'd have giggled! "

My ex husband and I were sitting on a sofa talking to my parents many years ago. I felt a vibration which I assumed was his phone going off so I said "is that you", wondered briefly why he was struggling not to laugh then saw his phone sitting on the table next to me. I kept a straight face but god knows how...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I still find farts as amusing as when I was a child

I like to say "get out and walk, I ain't carrying you no more"

I've always liked "Keep shouting, Sir! We'll find you!"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I still find farts as amusing as when I was a child

I like to say "get out and walk, I ain't carrying you no more"

I've always liked "Keep shouting, Sir! We'll find you!"

Stealing that! Lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I'm in a toilet cubicle, and somebody walks in and breaks wind, I'll be trying so hard to hold it together, and been known to have tears streaming down my face. I can't help it. "

This gets me every time!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

The best £1.59 I ever spent in my life was on a Roger's Profanisaurus phone app. I truly can't recommend it enough if you'd like to demean yourself by giggling like an infant at toilet humour and euphemisms for onanism. Trust me, you'll be glad you did

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

Once in a long till queue with the ex wife I let a silent but incredibly smelly fart go, when the noxious cloud was noticed, I proclaimed in a loud voice "Is that you? You dirty cow" and strode out the shop.

She found me outside with tears running down my face - she ignored me and walked straight past me, god knows why lol

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By *ndrew CareyMan
over a year ago

Peterborough, Cambridgeshire & Lincolnshire

Cereal for dinner

Still watch cartoons

Still watch wrestling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Once in a long till queue with the ex wife I let a silent but incredibly smelly fart go, when the noxious cloud was noticed, I proclaimed in a loud voice "Is that you? You dirty cow" and strode out the shop.

She found me outside with tears running down my face - she ignored me and walked straight past me, god knows why lol "

My ex husband expelled a bona fide "arse banshee" in a supermarket queue once and walked off pretending to have forgotten something leaving me with a truly livid bloke standing in front me. From his face I would guess he's still pissed off about it now...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My sense of humour at times can be juvenile and when I act out emotionally rather than consciously managing my emotions.

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

She found me outside with tears running down my face - she ignored me and walked straight past me, god knows why lol

Its always hilarious for the perpetrator

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Like to throw in the odd ‘chinny beard’ when someone tells a story "

I'm loving this

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I don’t go home on a night out until the place I’m in closes.... must learn my age haha "

Yeah I noticed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Scooting and riding shopping trolleys in supermarkets and car parks, the IKEA ones roll the best plenty of room in the car parks too, always get a funny look of guys my own age

ride or die bitch, ride or die

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

"Like to throw in the odd ‘chinny beard’ when someone tells a story "

Round here it's "chinny reckon". I had to explain it to a 22 year old colleague who had never heard of it. I think he thought I'd just made it up until he googled it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Schoolboy sense of humour. Dark, weird schoolboy, but still schoolboy. Rufusal to take life seriously and of course I'm on here.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Refusal

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By *hatYorkLadMan
over a year ago

York

"Like to throw in the odd ‘chinny beard’ when someone tells a story

Round here it's "chinny reckon". I had to explain it to a 22 year old colleague who had never heard of it. I think he thought I'd just made it up until he googled it."

It was "chinny Mandela" at my school for some reason

I'm as immature as it gets half the time, don't grow up it's a trap!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 13/01/20 15:51:41]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have a giggle when eating a scottish crumpet, one side of it feels velvety like the skin on a cock rubbing against my lips, yummy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I can't keep a straight face when I hear the names Gay Byrne, or Engelbert Humperdinck. I always do that laugh-snort-through-my-nose thing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A few years back the Tories had a campaign poster with a picture of Cameron looking his floppy haired, Ruperty best with the slogan "we can't go on like this". Some genius wrote underneath it "with suspicious minds" and painted a quiff and sideburns on him. I wish people would do things like that more often. There's a stop sign opposite my boyfriends house and someone has written "Hammer time!" under it. These people are my soul tribe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I write funny things on stickers and put them on my workmates backs.

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By *sianmale89Man
over a year ago

Stockport

I do far too many immature things to list tbh, off the top off my head though is me sneaking up on people I work with or even family members and just freaking them out by making a random noise....either that or occasionally poking or prodding a guy I work with a stick who does the same back

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"A few years back the Tories had a campaign poster with a picture of Cameron looking his floppy haired, Ruperty best with the slogan "we can't go on like this". Some genius wrote underneath it "with suspicious minds" and painted a quiff and sideburns on him. I wish people would do things like that more often. There's a stop sign opposite my boyfriends house and someone has written "Hammer time!" under it. These people are my soul tribe

I love stuff like that. This is similar, but slightly more tragic.. but back in the days of the Pants Lane vandalism, I once spray painted "nobody has ever truly loved you" onto the concrete pillar of a bridge on a main road. I often wonder how many people read that on their way to work on rainy Monday mornings whilst breaking out in tears.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We have large speakers at work that play club music to motivate the work force, I regularly connect by bluetooth and when one of the girls walks past use my phones fart app to let a ripper out. Makes me giggle like a 3 year old.

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

I don' think I'm immature at all! So "Ner-Ner-Na-Ner-Ner"!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"When I'm in a toilet cubicle, and somebody walks in and breaks wind, I'll be trying so hard to hold it together, and been known to have tears streaming down my face. I can't help it. "

That genuinely did make me laugh out loud

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By *ooBulMan
over a year ago

Missin’ Yo’ Kissin’

To be honest.... there is nothing wrong at looking at the world with child like wonder at all. It takes us away from the mundane things we have to do as adults like:- paying bills, having pointless crap arguments with others close to us. Putting up with relatives... You dig me u crazy cats!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I try to find the humour in most things... even the saddest day can be lifted a little with a smile and a laugh...

Do not take life to seriously and don't be offended at everything....you will be dead one day...

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I've got a ridiculously juvenile sense of humour. Me and my 10 year old laugh like drains about all kinds of daft stuff

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