FabSwingers.com forum: Opps...

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

No. I can't even come close

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Omg. Are you OK?

Probably I can.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I'm mortified for you

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yeap.

I flashed me cock on here once ......

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By *ensualbicockMan
over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

What did Popeye say ?

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Omg. Are you OK?

Probably I can. "

Yes I'm fine, I was in shock and did the only thing I could... I cried.

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By *epsonWoman
over a year ago

Biddulph

When my Jack Russell squatted in the middle of the vets waiting room, and did a pooh that stunk the room out.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I'm mortified for you

Oh it was awful especially as the staff were so nice.

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

"Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that? "

I knocked a family size jar of beetroot off the shelf in the Asda! It splattered two customers and went everywhere. The whole aisle was cordoned off.....

Where is my prize?

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

"Omg. Are you OK?

Probably I can.

Yes I'm fine, I was in shock and did the only thing I could... I cried.

Nothing more you could do really. It's all in a days work for them though

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"What did Popeye say ?"

They couldn't have been nicer. My boots were ruined and shop manager helped me clean them. In my defence it actually wasn't my fault as I trying to move out of the way of someone and my coat brushed against it on the shelf.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that?

I knocked a family size jar of beetroot off the shelf in the Asda! It splattered two customers and went everywhere. The whole aisle was cordoned off.....

Where is my prize? "

Ohh that's just as bad.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My waters broke all over the floor in Asda

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A woman in work pointed out that my laced knickers were on show when i was bent over putting more paper in the printer.....have never worn any to work since

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Omg. Are you OK?

Probably I can.

Yes I'm fine, I was in shock and did the only thing I could... I cried.

Nothing more you could do really. It's all in a days work for them though "

Yes but then the manager insisted on my giving me £10 towards new boots.

I wanted the ground to open up!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"My waters broke all over the floor in Asda

Oh that's messy. The staff were probably excited that you went into labour in their store and relieved they you didn't give birth there.

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By *ldham12345xxxMan
over a year ago

oldham

Hi how’s you

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When my Jack Russell squatted in the middle of the vets waiting room, and did a pooh that stunk the room out."

I'm sure they are used to it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Aww OP I (her) would have been embarrassed too.

I once came home from college (many years ago) and I had a nap, I woke up at nearly 8 o'clock in a panic and thought I had slept all night and would miss my lift to college. So I caught a bus and when 3/4 of the way to college I thought it was odd that there were kids playing outside rather than going to school.... I realised that it was 8pm and not 8am the next day... I got off the bus and on another to take me back home.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Hi how’s you "

Embarrassed and trying to Google how to get oil out of suede boots.

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By *ensualbicockMan
over a year ago

liverpool wavertree picton clock

I worked as a security guy inside a off licence ( Victoria wine ) one christmas. I leaned back to rest on a stack of cans but the plastic rings had been taken off the and the cans were loose. Ended up lying on the floor surrounded by about 300 cans of Castlmaine Maxx. Everyone in the shop just laughed.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I worked as a security guy inside a off licence ( Victoria wine ) one christmas. I leaned back to rest on a stack of cans but the plastic rings had been taken off the and the cans were loose. Ended up lying on the floor surrounded by about 300 cans of Castlmaine Maxx. Everyone in the shop just laughed.

That makes me feel better.

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By *epsonWoman
over a year ago

Biddulph

"When my Jack Russell squatted in the middle of the vets waiting room, and did a pooh that stunk the room out.

I'm sure they are used to it. "

I'm sure the shops are used to people breaking things too, it is different when it happens to you. I thought that was the point

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When my Jack Russell squatted in the middle of the vets waiting room, and did a pooh that stunk the room out.

I'm sure they are used to it.

I'm sure the shops are used to people breaking things too, it is different when it happens to you. I thought that was the point

Yes but oil! Of all the things it could be.

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

I once ran out in front of the Queens car. I was late for work and ran across the road in between the outriders and the car the Queen was in. They had to do an emergency stop. I was half asleep and didn’t initially realised it was her in the car until I’d got to the other side of the road and saw her look a bit shocked

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/01/20 21:22:14]

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

"My waters broke all over the floor in Asda

Oh that's messy. The staff were probably excited that you went into labour in their store and relieved they you didn't give birth there.

Was it a boy? Called George?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that? "

I've done that too. Share your embarrassment!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I once walked out of b&q and dropped a pot of paint which not only covered me and the path in a nice glossy white but the pot bounced up and dented the car parked next to the door

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that?

I've done that too. Share your embarrassment!

It was actually rather nasty as I covered in glass, Iv never seen a jar shatter like that. Just glad no one got hurt.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I once walked out of b&q and dropped a pot of paint which not only covered me and the path in a nice glossy white but the pot bounced up and dented the car parked next to the door

Ohh that really is opps.

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By *hrista BellendWoman
over a year ago

surrounded by twinkly lights

Last year at bournemouth beach air show I accidentally leant on the public shower button as I bent over to put my flip flops on, I was fully clothed and laughed at by lots and lots of people as I stood up soaked and just walked off staring up into the sky so I didn't cry

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By *latinumkittenWoman
over a year ago

from Home Counties to Middle Earth

Devastating, Lorna. Oil is so hard to clean up x

I did a neighbourly thing and offered to take their dog out for a walk when they were ill. I stopped to talk to an old lady in the street and mid-sentence, she stopped and looked down. My eyes followed hers to see the dog using her as a lamppost

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By *ot-AshMan
over a year ago

London

After a major operation a few years ago when they tried to get me out of bed the next day I did a wee on the physios brand new shoes by accident!

I didn't see her again the next day! :

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Thank you everyone. I feel so bad now that I know I'm not the only one.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"After a major operation a few years ago when they tried to get me out of bed the next day I did a wee on the physios brand new shoes by accident!

I didn't see her again the next day! :

you.

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

Coming round after having my appendix out, I threw up over the ward matron who came to check on me as they were also my next door neighbour

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By *epsonWoman
over a year ago

Biddulph

"Devastating, Lorna. Oil is so hard to clean up x

I know I shouldn't, but I actually laughed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My waters broke all over the floor in Asda

Oh that's messy. The staff were probably excited that you went into labour in their store and relieved they you didn't give birth there.

They seemed happy when the ambulance arrived

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

"My waters broke all over the floor in Asda

Ooooo

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My waters broke all over the floor in Asda

Oh that's messy. The staff were probably excited that you went into labour in their store and relieved they you didn't give birth there.

Was it a boy? Called George?

It was a boy. Why didn’t I think to call him that ?

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By *ed LipstickWoman
over a year ago

Fucksville

I tripped over at an interview and actually landed on the interviewers knee. She asked me had I eaten breakfast that morning (obviously mistook my innate clumsiness for something else) didn't even get the job either!

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

[Removed by poster at 08/01/20 21:36:28]

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"I tripped over at an interview and actually landed on the interviewers knee. She asked me had I eaten breakfast that morning (obviously mistook my innate clumsiness for something else) didn't even get the job either!

Oh nooo. That's definitely an ooppps moment.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Omg when i was married we took my stepdad + mum for dinner...the restaurant was on two levels, with the entrance + till on the top floor ...a lot of drink was consumed

When we went to pay, my stepdad reached through various bodies at the till to get an aniseed ball /mint from what i can only describe as a giant brandy glass. He was looking at me and giggling, being naughty, stealing a sweet.

In slow motion i watched as the jar tipped over... spilling what seemed like 99million anniseed + mint balls... And they ping ponged across the floor until they found the open staircase and started to 'rain' down it, bouncing into dinners, diners, drinks, waiters.. A couple of people did comedy cartoon motions... And a hush fell over the packed restaurant as everyone turned to stare

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By *ed-monkeyCouple
over a year ago

Hailsham

"Omg when i was married we took my stepdad + mum for dinner...the restaurant was on two levels, with the entrance + till on the top floor ...a lot of drink was consumed

Was it the curse of your knicker demon?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Omg when i was married we took my stepdad + mum for dinner...the restaurant was on two levels, with the entrance + till on the top floor ...a lot of drink was consumed

I can picture that. Hilarious

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Omg when i was married we took my stepdad + mum for dinner...the restaurant was on two levels, with the entrance + till on the top floor ...a lot of drink was consumed

I can picture that. Hilarious

That is brilliant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When we finally plucked up courage to return, they'd replaced the aniseed + mints with drumstick lollies

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"When we finally plucked up courage to return, they'd replaced the aniseed + mints with drumstick lollies

Sounds like a wise move.

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By *latinumkittenWoman
over a year ago

from Home Counties to Middle Earth

"Devastating, Lorna. Oil is so hard to clean up x

I know I shouldn't, but I actually laughed

I laughed typing it

I recall being stunned and speechless at the time. Half of me, mortified, wanting the ground to swallow me up, and the other half to die laughing out of sheer awkwardness. I can still picture the look on her face!

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By *ourayloversCouple
over a year ago

chesterfield

Once asked a shop assistant how much their 10p lollys were

Ray

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

"I once ran out in front of the Queens car. I was late for work and ran across the road in between the outriders and the car the Queen was in. They had to do an emergency stop. I was half asleep and didn’t initially realised it was her in the car until I’d got to the other side of the road and saw her look a bit shocked "

Lucky...A friend was an outrider, do you know why they only have low screens on their bikes? Because under their coats they carry short stock HK machine guns (from memory).. he’s retired now though so model of weapon carried may have changed.

So when you see a short screen police bike with Queeny or the PM you now know why..

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By *unningFoxWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I had flu and I was in management meeting and I sort of thought I covered all my face before sneeze but obviously something went wrong and I Iittle bit sneezed in my bosses face

I kept apologise for a week and felt so terrible!

Thank for it was end of meeting and end of working day so about apologising first 5 minutes I made a run home.

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By *aughtyLondonGuyMan
over a year ago

london

So when you see a short screen police bike with Queeny or the PM you now know why..

Shit, my lucky day then

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Omg when i was married we took my stepdad + mum for dinner...the restaurant was on two levels, with the entrance + till on the top floor ...a lot of drink was consumed

Oh my this is outstandingly funny... I would laugh for years thinking of that night.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Turns out oil doesn't come off suede

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turns out oil doesn't come off suede

I imagine oil destroys most things

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Turns out oil doesn't come off suede

I imagine oil destroys most things

It seemed to destroy most of the shop.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Turns out oil doesn't come off suede

I imagine oil destroys most things

It seemed to destroy most of the shop.

The floor will be slippy for years

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Turns out oil doesn't come off suede

I imagine oil destroys most things

It seemed to destroy most of the shop.

The floor will be slippy for years"

I can never go back in

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

"Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that? "

Nope! That’s got to be a bloody classic Lorna!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

The staff put a load of salt on it and there were salty footprints everywhere.

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By *epsonWoman
over a year ago

Biddulph

"Once asked a shop assistant how much their 10p lollys were

Ray"

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that?

Nope! That’s got to be a bloody classic Lorna! "

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By *urvyandCurious999Woman
over a year ago

Hiding from twats

Did a shore dive last year. Finished the dive, walked up the beach, tripped over a rock and landed flat on my face in full SCUBA gear in front of over 100 half naked sun bathers

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By *lint-EverhardMan
over a year ago

Perpignan and cap

"My waters broke all over the floor in Asda

Oh that's messy. The staff were probably excited that you went into labour in their store and relieved they you didn't give birth there.

Was it a boy? Called George?

It was a boy. Why didn’t I think to call him that ?"

What boy George?

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By *heLaserGuyMan
over a year ago

Coventry

"Omg when i was married we took my stepdad + mum for dinner...the restaurant was on two levels, with the entrance + till on the top floor ...a lot of drink was consumed

That is so funny, so is the command of the English language you have, just spat my beer out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Oh god, OP

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Oh god.

If it helps my brother did similar with a tin of paint in b&q

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

Borrowed my dad's car for the day, went and bought 3 tins of paint in the morning and put them in the boot. Went to get them out that evening and at some point in the day the lids had come off two of them.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Oh god.

If it helps my brother did similar with a tin of paint in b&q"

Reading everyone else's stories really has.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Borrowed my dad's car for the day, went and bought 3 tins of paint in the morning and put them in the boot. Went to get them out that evening and at some point in the day the lids had come off two of them."

Oppps indeed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Erm.

For a while when I was with an ex he moved back in with his parents and his son. One night he got this lightweight very d*unk on South African brandy. So we go to bed, just getting down to it, and I threw up in my mouth, pushed him off, ran down the nice plush cream carpeted hallway dribbling black vomit on said carpet all the way. My then boyf helped me shower and comb my hair and popped me into one of his t shirts and we got settled down again.

Thankfully his mum completely blamed him for getting me so d*unk and had him help her clean up the next morning.

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"Thank you everyone. I feel so bad now that I know I'm not the only one.

Never happened to me

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I also worked in a home bargains as a teenager and we had loads of things knocked off shelves. Wine bottles usually though we also had jars of cooking sauce, a bottle of vinegar, etc. The only one that really annoyed everyone was a jar of garlic and chilli purree because the shop stunk of garlic for days

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

My bestie... having had a lot to drink ... tipped down a step in a restaurant, reached out to steady herself as she fell.... pulled a table cloth off, destroyed a meal and landed up sprawled out over the floor

I might add it was in a particular fancy restaurant, overlooking the sea on the island of Kos

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had just moved in to my house and had a young puppy. I took him out one day and my neighbour was smoking in his front garden. My dog ran up to him and peed all over his slippers.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Went to the co-op and accidentally knocked a huge bottle of olive oil off the shelf!

The bottle shattered and oil and glass everywhere.

I was so embarrassed, covered in glass and oil as was most of the Isle. They had to shut part of the shop. Never been so embarrassed in all my life.

Can you top that? "

Went to a health spa and took my own hair masks and a lush bottle of body oil, yeap opened the oil slippery fingers dropped the glass bottle in the changing room oil everywhere with broken glass!! Never again lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reversed my car into my house. Wanted to move it 2 ft forward went 10 ft back!!

Automatic.

Best was.. I needed new back sensors on car anyway prior and front room painting. Window needed replacing..so new bumper n sensors. Front room decorated new bay window... Cost me just my excess. So much cheaper

I asked insurance should I pilot a helicopter as I need rest of house paining n new windows.. They laughed

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 08/01/20 23:37:02]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"My bestie... having had a lot to drink ... tipped down a step in a restaurant, reached out to steady herself as she fell.... pulled a table cloth off, destroyed a meal and landed up sprawled out over the floor

I might add it was in a particular fancy restaurant, overlooking the sea on the island of Kos

Omg

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