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"Can I come 
I hope so yea  "Looks like it’s just us 2...I’ll change the name....  | |||
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"Is there a free bar? " I hope so otherwise I’m not going | |||
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"Is there a free bar? " Yes...well....just put drinks on cheekys tab | |||
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"It promises to be a day to remember; I’ve just booked some Morris Dancers for entertainment and they’ll be a chocolate fountain (which Dave down the pub assures me still works) "Calm down ..that’s to much excitement | |||
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"I still have the last jar of pickled eggs from Christmas left over to; Fine dining is thus assured.... " Oh goody, I hope you like marmite  | |||
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"It promises to be a day to remember; I’ve just booked some Morris Dancers for entertainment and they’ll be a chocolate fountain (which Dave down the pub assures me still works)
Calm down ..that’s to much excitement "shall i buy a hat | |||
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"I still have the last jar of pickled eggs from Christmas left over to; Fine dining is thus assured.... Oh goody, I hope you like marmite "Oooo yessss!  Shall we put it in the chocolate fountain for a joke? | |||
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"I still have the last jar of pickled eggs from Christmas left over to; Fine dining is thus assured.... Oh goody, I hope you like marmite
Oooo yessss! Shall we put it in the chocolate fountain for a joke? "If it’s ok with Dave down the pub, then yes | |||
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"I wanna write the best man's speech!! "Of course (can you omit mentioning all that unfortunate business with me and the Asda gloryhole though? I honestly thought it was a new type of urinal.....yes...) | |||
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"How ya doing for bridesmaids?" We need some indeed - the more the merrier. And will you all please help me to eat this jar of pickled eggs? | |||
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"How ya doing for bridesmaids? We need some indeed - the more the merrier. And will you all please help me to eat this jar of pickled eggs? "Mash them into the marmite fountain | |||
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"How ya doing for bridesmaids? We need some indeed - the more the merrier. And will you all please help me to eat this jar of pickled eggs?
Mash them into the marmite fountain " Hmmmm.....you have just inspired me with this wondrous recipe idea my future bride; This taste sensation will surely win over John Torode and Gregg Wallace when I make my triumphant entry on Masterchef this year | |||
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"How ya doing for bridesmaids? We need some indeed - the more the merrier. And will you all please help me to eat this jar of pickled eggs?
Mash them into the marmite fountain
Hmmmm.....you have just inspired me with this wondrous recipe idea my future bride; This taste sensation will surely win over John Torode and Gregg Wallace when I make my triumphant entry on Masterchef this year "I can’t wait to see their faces when they try it | |||
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"How ya doing for bridesmaids? We need some indeed - the more the merrier. And will you all please help me to eat this jar of pickled eggs?
Mash them into the marmite fountain " you two are suited | |||
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"Ey up! I’ve just realised that we don’t have a vicar! Um....I don’t suppose there’s any on here willing to join us in holy matrimony? " Shhhhhhhuuuusssh  | |||
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"Ey up! I’ve just realised that we don’t have a vicar! Um....I don’t suppose there’s any on here willing to join us in holy matrimony? Shhhhhhhuuuusssh " Dave down the pub has come to the rescue; he says he’ll fill the role in exchange for a pint. He’s also offered some sausage rolls and will sing (probably highly ineptly) at our reception | |||
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"Well I guess I could do that instead of being a bridesmaid if that helps? "That will be great | |||
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"Oh I love a wedding, can I bring my own food though, Im not sure Id like those chocolate eggs "If you can share it out then by all means. Do you have any Vol Au Vonts? I love them | |||
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"What’s this?! 
(Broken heart emoji) "Sorry Nora but you spend the wedding night with us | |||
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"What’s this?!
(Broken heart emoji)
Sorry Nora but you spend the wedding night with us "Oh ok . Heart mended | |||
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"Do you need a bartender?" Yes indeed; Keep ‘em flowing | |||
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"I am a wedding photographer if you need some memories recording "Are you around at night? id quite like a keepsake | |||
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"I'm not coming." I can give you hand with that pp | |||
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"What’s this?!
(Broken heart emoji)
Sorry Nora but you spend the wedding night with us
Oh ok . Heart mended "I knew that would mend it  | |||
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"What’s this?!
(Broken heart emoji)
Sorry Nora but you spend the wedding night with us
Oh ok . Heart mended ";-) You can carry my train to. Oh....wait.... I wear a suit right? | |||
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"I am a wedding photographer if you need some memories recording
Are you around at night? id quite like a keepsake "Ooooooo me too | |||
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"What’s this?!
(Broken heart emoji)
Sorry Nora but you spend the wedding night with us
Oh ok . Heart mended
;-) You can carry my train to. Oh....wait.... I wear a suit right? "Yes! I think suit. Definitely suit | |||
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"What’s this?!
(Broken heart emoji)
Sorry Nora but you spend the wedding night with us
Oh ok . Heart mended
I knew that would mend it "No more maltesers for you  | |||
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"Do you need a bartender? Yes indeed; Keep ‘em flowing "Whoo hooo! | |||
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"I'm not coming. I can give you hand with that pp "Does that mean I've pulled | |||
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"I'm not coming. I can give you hand with that pp
Does that mean I've pulled "Double wedding sir | |||
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"I'm not coming. I can give you hand with that pp
Does that mean I've pulled "I think you’re being pulled | |||
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"What’s this?!
(Broken heart emoji)
Sorry Nora but you spend the wedding night with us
Oh ok . Heart mended
I knew that would mend it
No more maltesers for you "That’s just mean  ...I was going to ask you to make the cock cakes | |||
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"I'm not coming. I can give you hand with that pp
Does that mean I've pulled "You pulled a muscle did you say dear | |||
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"I'm not coming. I can give you hand with that pp
Does that mean I've pulled
Double wedding sir "I'll need more than a hand job for that to happen | |||
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"Before. I can marry the bride and groom I have three questions I must ask to ensure this is a pure marriage ... " Go on then | |||
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"Firstly, are you both virgins? " Eh...... Does it count if I didn’t inhale it? | |||
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"Firstly, are you both virgins? Eh...... Does it count if I didn’t inhale it? "Virgin on the insane. So I think yes | |||
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"Firstly, are you both virgins? Eh...... Does it count if I didn’t inhale it? "I may allow that ... | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach" That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P " Get over yourself wench | |||
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"POF, who’s your plus one then! "Who ever asks first (hint hint) | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench " We have the wedding punch up | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench We have the wedding punch up "Oh and my money is on lady Pp, sorry dude | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench We have the wedding punch up
Oh and my money is on lady Pp, sorry dude "Mate, a swift back hander and she'll be done | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench "
Bless ya cotton ones
P | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench We have the wedding punch up
Oh and my money is on lady Pp, sorry dude
Mate, a swift back hander and she'll be done "Tis on beeeyatch
P | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench We have the wedding punch up
Oh and my money is on lady Pp, sorry dude
Mate, a swift back hander and she'll be done "Where shall I send the flowers | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench We have the wedding punch up
Oh and my money is on lady Pp, sorry dude
Mate, a swift back hander and she'll be done
Tis on beeeyatch
P"You couldn't touch me. You couldn't hit water if you fell out of a boat | |||
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"Um.....I know this isn’t the usual role of the groom, but can I run bets on this historic battle? "Sorry, shes highjacking the thread like she always does Continue with your wedding | |||
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"Um.....I know this isn’t the usual role of the groom, but can I run bets on this historic battle? "What odds you giving | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench We have the wedding punch up
Oh and my money is on lady Pp, sorry dude
Mate, a swift back hander and she'll be done
Where shall I send the flowers "PP knows the score.
P | |||
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"Due to the over welcoming success of Prince of Matchmaking 2. These 2 quickly hit it off and are now getting married. I'm not sure when or where it is but who wants to go? Only one condition though, and I cannot stress this enough, dont bring that bitch Princess Peach That's coz you'll knock em out the way like skittles and try to marry me instead. Limelight thief! P Get over yourself wench We have the wedding punch up
Oh and my money is on lady Pp, sorry dude
Mate, a swift back hander and she'll be done
Where shall I send the flowers
PP knows the score.
P"That's because he can count. Unlike you Oooooooo | |||
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"I could make a wedding cake " | |||
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"Ey up! I’ve just realised that we don’t have a vicar! Um....I don’t suppose there’s any on here willing to join us in holy matrimony? " Would you like me to do the ceremony? I'm named after a Norse Goddess so I'm kind of divinely pagan qualified??? Witch Doctor could support with some extra juju? There's no one pure n holy here so we'll have to do I'm afraid. As it's a Norse ceremony there'll be a pause in the procedings for debauched fornication amongst the witnesses. And would you like to opt for the mead poured over the bride and groom, licked off by the oldest virgin riding a goat? | |||
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"Ey up! I’ve just realised that we don’t have a vicar! Um....I don’t suppose there’s any on here willing to join us in holy matrimony? Would you like me to do the ceremony? I'm named after a Norse Goddess so I'm kind of divinely pagan qualified??? Witch Doctor could support with some extra juju? There's no one pure n holy here so we'll have to do I'm afraid. As it's a Norse ceremony there'll be a pause in the procedings for debauched fornication amongst the witnesses. And would you like to opt for the mead poured over the bride and groom, licked off by the oldest virgin riding a goat? "I’ll have two of what she’s on | |||
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"Ey up! I’ve just realised that we don’t have a vicar! Um....I don’t suppose there’s any on here willing to join us in holy matrimony? Would you like me to do the ceremony? I'm named after a Norse Goddess so I'm kind of divinely pagan qualified??? Witch Doctor could support with some extra juju? There's no one pure n holy here so we'll have to do I'm afraid. As it's a Norse ceremony there'll be a pause in the procedings for debauched fornication amongst the witnesses. And would you like to opt for the mead poured over the bride and groom, licked off by the oldest virgin riding a goat? " Now THAT sounds like my sort of Wedding | |||
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"We could have a drink named after the happy couple. The Cheekylover The Sensual 69 " After a good few of them they start to merge; ‘The 69 Lover’ being my inebriated choice *hic* | |||
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"Ey up! I’ve just realised that we don’t have a vicar! Um....I don’t suppose there’s any on here willing to join us in holy matrimony? Would you like me to do the ceremony? I'm named after a Norse Goddess so I'm kind of divinely pagan qualified??? Witch Doctor could support with some extra juju? There's no one pure n holy here so we'll have to do I'm afraid. As it's a Norse ceremony there'll be a pause in the procedings for debauched fornication amongst the witnesses. And would you like to opt for the mead poured over the bride and groom, licked off by the oldest virgin riding a goat?
I’ll have two of what she’s on "I know yea the weirdo theres no goats on here | |||
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"Can we name the first child? " Yes, why not Something regal sounding would be nice. Or possibly Bert. There’s not enough Bert’s around these days. | |||
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"Can we name the first child? Yes, why not Something regal sounding would be nice. Or possibly Bert. There’s not enough Bert’s around these days."Assumed it would be a girl for some reason Hope it's in a nicely stately home | |||
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"Can we name the first child? Yes, why not Something regal sounding would be nice. Or possibly Bert. There’s not enough Bert’s around these days.
Assumed it would be a girl for some reason
Hope it's in a nicely stately home "If twins. Bert and Ernistine | |||
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"Can we name the first child? Yes, why not Something regal sounding would be nice. Or possibly Bert. There’s not enough Bert’s around these days.
Assumed it would be a girl for some reason
Hope it's in a nicely stately home
If twins. Bert and Ernistine "Will you be a bridesmaid? I want to fuck a bridesmaid  | |||
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"Can we name the first child? Yes, why not Something regal sounding would be nice. Or possibly Bert. There’s not enough Bert’s around these days.
Assumed it would be a girl for some reason
Hope it's in a nicely stately home
If twins. Bert and Ernistine
Will you be a bridesmaid? I want to fuck a bridesmaid "No. I'm the bartender. | |||
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"Can we name the first child? Yes, why not Something regal sounding would be nice. Or possibly Bert. There’s not enough Bert’s around these days.
Assumed it would be a girl for some reason
Hope it's in a nicely stately home
If twins. Bert and Ernistine
Will you be a bridesmaid? I want to fuck a bridesmaid
No. I'm the bartender."Ohh trying to get me d*unk huh | |||
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