FabSwingers.com forum: Such a bad feeling :/

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Don't you just hate it when you meet an old friend(or someone else) that you really like and have done for a long time, to get the same feelings back again that drive you insane but you know that they're way above you league and that you wound never have a chance!!

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

Never been there Dan.

Hope it feels better soon xx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never been there Dan.

Hope it feels better soon xx"

Thanks

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Don't you just hate it when you meet an old friend(or someone else) that you really like and have done for a long time, to get the same feelings back again that drive you insane but you know that they're way above you league and that you wound never have a chance!!

drive you insane in a good way just to make that clear :p

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

nah dont bother me

just move onto someone who you dont feel is to good for you

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By *uby In StockingsTV/TS
over a year ago

Cheadle

Dan, life is too short to wonder what might have been, you need to tell this person your feelings, you might just be surprised by their reactions, if not, then at least you know for certain, take adeep breath and go for it sugar plum, Auntie Ruby, xxxx

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

nah dont bother me

just move onto someone who you dont feel is to good for you

yeah, sometimes easier said than done. Suppose that comes with experience though. We get on great, but she is amazingly pretty so never going to happen.

thanks for your response

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Dan, life is too short to wonder what might have been, you need to tell this person your feelings, you might just be surprised by their reactions, if not, then at least you know for certain, take adeep breath and go for it sugar plum, Auntie Ruby, xxxx

aww thanks hun.. thats when I worry that I may ruin what we do have though

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

aww thanks hun.. thats when I worry that I may ruin what we do have though"

yeah be careful if she does not feel the same way she may stay clear of you in an attempt to not send out the wrong message if you do stay friends

it could work out great but you could loose a friend

i dont think id feel comfy still meeting up with a guy who had confessed he loved me

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

aww thanks hun.. thats when I worry that I may ruin what we do have though

yeah be careful if she does not feel the same way she may stay clear of you in an attempt to not send out the wrong message if you do stay friends

it could work out great but you could loose a friend

i dont think id feel comfy still meeting up with a guy who had confessed he loved me"

Yeah that's my worry

suppose I'll have to leave it

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By *drianukMan
over a year ago

Spain, Lancs

Dan, Naughty is right. Deep down you know you have to find someone else. We've all been there...and life carries on. Round the next corner etc...Good luck

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire

you say an old friend, is that a friend you have known for years, or that you havent seen for ages?

Em says there is no such thing as people that are out of anyones league, its all about attitude.

if you are positive about yourself and your own worth, then if she turns you down, you are out of her league.

you have to ask yourself, Dan, on your deathbed, will you regret never saying anything?

if the answer is yes, you owe it to yourself to tell her how you feel.

who knows, might be a life changer fella.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Em says there is no such thing as people that are out of anyones league, its all about attitude.

i have to agree with that, ive met some guys on here that as soon as they have turned up i've thought......theres no way on gods earth they are going to like me and all have proven me wrong, ive never met anyone off here that has told me no thanks upon on meets

im not compairing a meet on here to someone you have deep feeling about you have knows for years but the feeling of not being good enough is the same

Its not that people are out of your league its the way you feel about yourself that makes you feel no good enough

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By *ovedupstillCouple
over a year ago

mullinwire

Em says there is no such thing as people that are out of anyones league, its all about attitude.

im not compairing a meet on here to someone you have deep feeling about you have knows for years but the feeling of not being good enough is the same

Its not that people are out of your league its the way you feel about yourself that makes you feel no good enough

see, im like you, i know im a really nice, decent bloke, but on first looks the 'socially accepted gorgeous' women wouldnt look twice.

yet, get to know me and its the personality that wins it everytime.

thats what us ugly bokes have over good looking blokes, cuz we need a decent personality lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

see, im like you, i know im a really nice, decent bloke, but on first looks the 'socially accepted gorgeous' women wouldnt look twice.

thing is if im going to be honest the type of guy i would go for outside of swinging, who i would really look at and think he was just my type isnt what most people would class as 'socially accepted gorgeous' anyway, most womon on here wouldnt look twice at the type of man id go for

ive met hardly anyone on here who id class as my type, dont get me wrong i dont meet guys who i dont find attractive but attraction comes in all forms, i can look at a guy and think hes nice looking but still not my type but so as long as theres an attraction and we get on, on here thats all i care about as its only a shag lol

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By *iss_tressWoman
over a year ago

London

I've yet to meet anyone who is "out of my league" but I've met a few who I'm way out of theirs.

I also find it strange people use looks as a marker. The Sainsbury's delivery man looks like Ty Pennington and one of my assistants looks like a young Alex Baldwin. Some women on here would be creaming their pants and thinking they're 'out of their league" whilst I see "the help"...and not in a Lady Chatterly way!

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By *oantrimcpl2010Couple
over a year ago

Lisburn

"you say an old friend, is that a friend you have known for years, or that you havent seen for ages?

Em says there is no such thing as people that are out of anyones league, its all about attitude.

if you are positive about yourself and your own worth, then if she turns you down, you are out of her league.

you have to ask yourself, Dan, on your deathbed, will you regret never saying anything?

if the answer is yes, you owe it to yourself to tell her how you feel.

who knows, might be a life changer fella."

You dont have to declare undying love, but take the more gentle approach, ask her out on a date and take it from there. You never know she may feel exactly the same as you but doesn't want to rock the boat either.

It is better to regret the things you did, rather than regret the things you wish you did.

Good luck with what ever you choose to do. xx

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Dan, go for it mate, but carefully, you'll regret it if not. Personality and character will win out over looks. Engage her mind with banter and attention to her.

But, if she rejects the "sexy" side of it, settle with good grace for being a good mate to her. Sometimes sex does get in the way of very good relationships.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i don't feel anyone is too good for me

if i find someone physically attractive, which is the initial trigger for me, then they are in the mix.

if they don't feel the same way, then so be it, but that makes them no better or no worse than me - only that i am not attractive to them.

mrs bus is very well put together, with a personality that people instantly engage.

my long term male fb is stunningly attractive for a man.

i have been out and about with them both and have overheard people say 'what is she/he doing with him ?' and even 'what is she/he doing with THAT ?'

i've even heard people say 'oh he must be rich' (i wish)

the answer is pretty simple : i know that i'm a short, fat, bald middle aged bloke, but ya know what, some people actually like that - especially if there is a personality and good nature backing it up

whilst i recognise i will never appeal to the masses, let's just say being a niche market sometimes pays dividends

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You could always take a light hearted approach in jovial manner and tell her you used to have a crush on her when you were younger to guage her reaction.

Perhaps mentioning you are off out to the pub or somewhere for a bite to eat and she is welcome to join you and just have a bit of time catching up and have a giggle before telling her and just see how things are going before telling her.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. As long as you take it for what it is (a drink and a giggle) things should go well.

Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have never considered myself to be below anyone's league!

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You could always take a light hearted approach in jovial manner and tell her you used to have a crush on her when you were younger to guage her reaction.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. As long as you take it for what it is (a drink and a giggle) things should go well.

Good luck. "

I do like that idea

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

You just never know Dan unless you ask, I had a friend who I just doted on but never let him know cos he was soooo out of my league... I spent the weekend with him in York, we even shared a bed but nothing happened. Then afterwards he told one of my friends how he'd spent the whole weekend wishing he could fuck me just because he thinks I'm such a lovely person

I was gutted as he moved to Vietnam 2 weeks later

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i felt this way about a girl once. see her once in a bluemoon now and theres still a lil sumthing there

nowhere near as bad as it was

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have never considered myself to be below anyone's league!

yeh its usually them considering your not in their league

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By *am sampsonMan
over a year ago

cwmbran

Faint heart never won fair maiden

Would never consider myself out of someones league nor would I consider myself too good for someone - but I recognise people have preferences and tastes vary and as I got older I would not expect to be everyones cup of tea but over the years and even now I have met some beautiful women

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By *ont Ask Dont GetWoman
over a year ago

amersham

Go for it! I am seeing a guy off here who is 29 and looks like a dark Jude Law and on top of that he is the best fuck ever, ever, ever. Can't believe it... so out of my league it's untrue. He's not properly available, obviously, but we get on famously and enjoy it for what it is. I'll never be properly with him...he's married, too good looking and obviously can't be trusted but wouldn't have missed the ride for the world!

He's the main reason I'm not seeing anyone else at the moment...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never ever allow yourself to think somebody is out of your league, that kind of thinking can only lead to anxiety.

If she is not interested it does not in any way mean she is out of your league, only that she is not attracted to you.

And for me that is a huge difference.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I have never considered myself to be below anyone's league!

"
Yeah I use punching above my weight also

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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago

(She/ her) in Sensualityland

Dan, go for it mate, but carefully, you'll regret it if not. Personality and character will win out over looks. Engage her mind with banter and attention to her.

But, if she rejects the "sexy" side of it, settle with good grace for being a good mate to her. Sometimes sex does get in the way of very good relationships. "

I d echo this one hundred percent - do try, you might succeed as confidence is very sexy- good luck x

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"Never ever allow yourself to think somebody is out of your league, that kind of thinking can only lead to anxiety.

If she is not interested it does not in any way mean she is out of your league, only that she is not attracted to you.

And for me that is a huge difference.

Thanks,was interesting comment. I do have an anxiety problem actually

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Dan, go for it mate, but carefully, you'll regret it if not. Personality and character will win out over looks. Engage her mind with banter and attention to her.

But, if she rejects the "sexy" side of it, settle with good grace for being a good mate to her. Sometimes sex does get in the way of very good relationships.

I d echo this one hundred percent - do try, you might succeed as confidence is very sexy- good luck x"

Thanks, am building up courage to try is hard for me as I genuinely see myself as very ugly :s been on this site has been helping massively though. Is also making me more confident in other areas too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Yes, it is really hard, but try not to think of it in terms of leagues, you are no 'better' or 'worse', just different.... it could be about timing too you know, perhaps now it IS your time?

Only one way to find out, but try a softly, softly approach, and take it gently?

Good luck mate xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

When that happens you just say, "Look, let's put everything aside and have a shag purely for the sake of it."

Works sometimes too.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"You just never know Dan unless you ask, I had a friend who I just doted on but never let him know cos he was soooo out of my league... I spent the weekend with him in York, we even shared a bed but nothing happened. Then afterwards he told one of my friends how he'd spent the whole weekend wishing he could fuck me just because he thinks I'm such a lovely person

I was gutted as he moved to Vietnam 2 weeks later

Sorry to hear hun x

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By *ushroom7Man
over a year ago

Bradford

Whatever you do Dan do it fairly soon otherwise you'll have wanked yerself silly and blind. Voice of experience

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i don't feel anyone is too good for me

if i find someone physically attractive, which is the initial trigger for me, then they are in the mix.

if they don't feel the same way, then so be it, but that makes them no better or no worse than me - only that i am not attractive to them.

mrs bus is very well put together, with a personality that people instantly engage.

my long term male fb is stunningly attractive for a man.

i have been out and about with them both and have overheard people say 'what is she/he doing with him ?' and even 'what is she/he doing with THAT ?'

i've even heard people say 'oh he must be rich' (i wish)

whilst i recognise i will never appeal to the masses, let's just say being a niche market sometimes pays dividends"

Same here

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