FabSwingers.com forum: Crisis of Confidence

By *acey_Red OP Woman
over a year ago

Liverpool

How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts.

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By *ensualtouch15Man
over a year ago

ashby de la zouch

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts."

Do something I really enjoy or am good at or both

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

I try to remind myself of everything I have previously overcome and things I have achieved that I never thought I would. I also try to be kind to myself and remind myself that I'm only human.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

Overthink it and then try not to spiral into a depression.

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By *aven RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

I have them often. I try to remember the things I am good at, or give a close friend a call and she will tell me to put my big girl pants on and it will pass x

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By *ea monkeyMan
over a year ago

Manchester (he/him)

It depends what it's about mainly, if it's something that I'm wavering about doing, I tend to weigh up the options then go all in or completely out.

If it's an emotional aspect, I tend to get quite insular and work things through or journal.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Replay what’s causing the wobble and consider what’s happened from different perspectives-hopefully coming to the conclusion, yep I’m awesome

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I message a good friend and she tells me I'm beautiful and to get a grip

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

What I've always done, a very long walk. Being inside with my thoughts are never a good idea, however outside with the fresh air and seeing other people and nature makes me realise I'm not alone.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Replay what’s causing the wobble and consider what’s happened from different perspectives-hopefully coming to the conclusion, yep I’m awesome

Oh and there she is now

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I take a step back and re assess.

And understand that the feelings pass

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I message a good friend and she tells me I'm beautiful and to get a grip "

You are

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Overthink it and then try not to spiral into a depression.

Sister?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I generally accept my feelings at the time, they are valid after all. Gonna have ups and downs so just ride the wave, work through it and dont fight it otherwise it gets bigger, it passes and order is restored

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Use my humour if possible, if we can laugh at whatever it's instantly belittled or desensitised.

Deeper things I don't deal with so good and find time and a good mask my only defence.

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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"Overthink it and then try not to spiral into a depression.

Sister? "

I really should have started Overthinkers Anonymous.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

"Overthink it and then try not to spiral into a depression.

Sister?

I really should have started Overthinkers Anonymous.

We never stay anonymous. People know our game

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts."

Oh jesus... erm...

If it's a body confidence thing I ain't too bad. Yes I have wobbles but then I think aside from surgery or hitting the gym there's bugger all I can do. This is my body, sometimes it's in better shape than at other times but it's still me.

Then the emotional ones. These are my kryptonite.

It's like I'm looking for a quick fix but I can't find it.

Like, "if I could just work out how to XYZ and not let it bother me then everything will fall into place"

Then I worry that if if doesn't I'm screwed. Then I worry about the level of worry I'm displaying internally and sometimes externally ...and that in turn makes me worry that I'm over worrying and should I go see someone, am I gonna have another breakdown? Am I too far gone to live a healthy minded life?

Yeahhhhhhh.

What works for me as a temporary patch is visiting friends who I know love me for me, for my soul. I get rather worse for wear and have a bit of a reset.

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By *2and3quartersWoman
over a year ago

Bumbletown

It's rare I have wobbles these days but I had one last week. I'd found out that someone close had been lying to me for a while and it really made me question my judgement.

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

I get momentarily stroppy until I calm myself down and swallow what little pride that I have left. Emotions suck, major donkey dick

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By *r MoriartyMan
over a year ago

The Land that time forgot (Norfolk)

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts."

What's one of those?

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By *opinovMan
over a year ago

Point Nemo, Cumbria

With varying degrees of success, or lack thereof. I try not to think in terms of interaction with others, as much as of the things I've achieved myself - but then maybe that's just a reflection of the world I inhabit.

I'll admit it can be difficult though... and I do find Xmas a bit trying.

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By *eliWoman
over a year ago

Take some time out from what is worrying me. Overthink a fuckton, really dislike myself at some point and then talk to loved ones, practise mindfulness and remember my worth. A good fuck and open communication with one of my dear friends normally helps as well.

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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago

West Wales

I try to think about the things I have done that many probably wouldn’t have had the confidence to do at the age & in the time period I did them.

Also think about where I am now compared to where I grew up.

Maybe it’s because I was a London motorcycle courier for years & have been a biker since I was twelve that I also think about some of those no longer with us, (Many) what they lost & tell myself that no matter how bad I feel now things could be so much worse...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I think of all the shit decisions I've made so far and say to myself, eventually you'll run out of shit decisions to make.

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

I tend to shut off temporarily from everyone around me, just until my internal monologue has covered every aspect of what's bothering me and decided i'm being a dick!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I go for a walk or a bike ride to some where quiet . Sit myself down and Remeber to breathe

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts."

Self doubt what's that?

Lol maybe try not to worry about pleasing other people and just be proud of yourself stunner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 21/12/19 16:38:52]

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

What's up OP?

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By *ensuallover1000Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Vodka and a pork pie

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By *ifty grades of shadyCouple
over a year ago

Carisbrooke, Isle of Wight

Had more than our fair share this year, have adopted a fuck it and just live in the moment attitude.

Life is too short to get bogged down with the things that aren't in your control, and those you can just get on with it, then do the things you want to do.

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By *nliveneTV/TS
over a year ago

Selby

For long time i lived without any confidence but now i just say to myself i only live once .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I cry and eat a bueno in front of for all mankind

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By *elloIntrigueMan
over a year ago

North West UK

These days I take a deep breath and take that first step. I often get little pangs of self doubt and confidence attacks in certain circumstances. But I move on - I'm not going to let the depression win again.

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By *elloIntrigueMan
over a year ago

North West UK

Eek I killed it...

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By *Jones19Man
over a year ago

Evesham, Worcester, Pershore

I have a drink, look back on the times when nailed it and just keep saying to myself "I did it once, I can do it again". It doesnt always work but it either does to kicks me into gear to fix what ever needs fixing to get my confidence.

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Seal myself away, write down what I’m feeling, why I’m feeling it and work through the issue in my mind before popping it away in its box and locking the key.

Occasionally I’ll reach out to talk to make sure I’m not going nuts. The first option normally works though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts."

We all go through this at some point of our life. I take time to write a journal everyday. I record how I am feeling and end with a note of gratitude, for what I have and what I have achieved in my life. I sometimes take a 'physical step' out of my negative feelings. It has always worked for me!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Masterbate

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts."

Know they will pass, and be kind to myself in the meantime (which is hard).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I had a chat with a friend this week about this very thing, he's been struggling lately to get his mojo back. My advice for what it's worth is to think about the times in your life you had it tough but made it through. Those times you thought were the worst but you got on with it and made it out the other side. We all go through some shit in our lives but it's those times that make us stronger and sculpt us as human beings. It's easier said than done obviously, but you can definitely find confidence in knowing that if you get knocked down and pick yourself up again then things will get better.

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By *iger4uWoman
over a year ago

In my happy place

Nobidy else really knows or cares

So dig deep. Carry on. The fear of doing is worse than just getting on with it.

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By *elloIntrigueMan
over a year ago

North West UK

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts.

Know they will pass, and be kind to myself in the meantime (which is hard). "

This is a good point. Personally I am also managing to be less self critical. That has really helped.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Chin up tits out never stop moving forward

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My whole life is a crisis of confidence.

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By *ifeandhubby400Couple
over a year ago

Arse hole of nowhere ,Scotland

Ive been ill for a few days and probably shouldnt be on here as im having a bit of a wobble ....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Usually do something important while giving my head a wobble knowing it will soon pass.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I break things until i see how powerful i am or go find a win maybe beat myself at pool or summat

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Crisis what crisis....

Goes back and sits in cave scribbling gibberish

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Trouble in paradise

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"I break things until i see how powerful i am or go find a winkle maybe beat myself off in the pool or summat"

Nice to hear

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"I break things until i see how powerful i am or go find a winkle maybe beat myself off in the pool or summat

Nice to hear

"
oye

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts."

Momentary? Since when are those momentary feelings. They are very much permanent ways in which I see myself.

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By *acey_Red OP Woman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts.

Oh jesus... erm...

Then the emotional ones. These are my kryptonite.

It's like I'm looking for a quick fix but I can't find it.

Like, "if I could just work out how to XYZ and not let it bother me then everything will fall into place"

Yeahhhhhhh.

What works for me as a temporary patch is visiting friends who I know love me for me, for my soul. I get rather worse for wear and have a bit of a reset.

It seems to go hand in hand for me. I'll be plodding along doing fine and then the doubts come along in all areas at once

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By *acey_Red OP Woman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"It's rare I have wobbles these days but I had one last week. I'd found out that someone close had been lying to me for a while and it really made me question my judgement.

I'm really sorry to hear that. Sadly some people are cunning enough to deceive anyone. It's probably nothing to do with you having poor judgement. I can understand the frustration though but the only way to ever be totally immune to it is never to let anyone in and that's no life (heart).

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By *acey_Red OP Woman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"It's rare I have wobbles these days but I had one last week. I'd found out that someone close had been lying to me for a while and it really made me question my judgement.

Ooops!

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Deep breath, count to 10, be calm....

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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

Eat too much and then feel even worse and more self conscious. Well that's where I'm at at the moment

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By *acey_Red OP Woman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"How do you deal with them?

Life's momentary wobbles and self doubts.

Self doubt what's that?

Lol maybe try not to worry about pleasing other people and just be proud of yourself stunner

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have wobbles and self doubts alot. I try and keep active and busy and chat to good people, and I hope I am improving. Trying to do more of what I like, like writing stories or photography. Music also helps, weird songs that the lyrics just mean alot to me. Sometimes, remembering what you've got through to get to here, can help me

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By *acey_Red OP Woman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"Trouble in paradise"

What?

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By *acey_Red OP Woman
over a year ago

Liverpool

Thanks everyone for the genuine advice and for the giggles from the not so genuine advice

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By *ryst In IsoldeWoman
over a year ago

your imagination

Oh those... Usually by hyperventilating until I pass out, or doing a tense bumsqueak at an inappropriately quiet moment

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

In an acute moment... I steel myself and lean on my survival instincts. Head down and tough it out.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Eat too much and then feel even worse and more self conscious. Well that's where I'm at at the moment "

Yeah, that's a fun one. The damage I've done trying to make myself feel better with custard creams...

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I listen to my bad bitch music playlist.

I find music quite helpful with my moods, if I get the songs right. Although there’s nothing worse than feeling buoyant and accidentally putting the love songs on and all the gloomy stuff plays first

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