FabSwingers.com forum: Strangel Story from Hermes

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

I worked for Hermes a few years ago in courier support and one call that came through just made me facepalm. Hermes don’t verify their couriers until they have been employed a month. If you remember a few years ago in December it was around - 5 degrees. A courier in the Midlands had cut an hole in his jeans with his dick hanging out and was exposing himself to whoever answered the door. A teenage girl answered the door. Not the kind of package she was expecting. Don’t know if he was hard or flaccid. All I know the police were involved and that was the last we heard of him. Apparently he had a record of exposing himself to women. Oops.

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By *adeiteWoman
over a year ago

Staffordshire

Well we all know how shit hermes are.

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

Hermes are nearly as bad as Yodel

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

i'm suprised he didn't just chuck it over the fence in the rain- then forge a signature, like they do with most parcels

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hermes are shit. Still waiting for a parcel for over a week now and every day I get either a delivered message or we will deliver today message.

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

In defence of Hermes I send around 300 parcels a year and have done so for the past 6 years, each parcel contains a glass coffee cafetiere.

In that six years I have had 7 breakages and 5 lost parcels, a far better outcome than in the previous 6 years when I used Royal Mail.

Sadly with regard to couriers you will always get a rotten apple or two in every barrel. Again I have been lucky with my local Hermes courier who has been delivering to me for the past 5 years, and boy is she hot

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Brings a whole new meaning to “delivering his package”

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Cutting a hole in his jeans seems like overcomplicating things. There's a zip.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Hermes are nearly as bad as Yodel "
.

I’m having a nightmare with yodel currently. I’ve ordere a package to be delivered to my local Argos and yodel are saying that they delivered it however Argos are saying I need my FM code which I’ve not received. Initially yodel said that they delivered it to a completely different address and now they are saying different.

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

Let’s be honest most couriers are pretty crap, they really don’t give a f@@k

Having used couriers to drop ship items, the amount of lost or damaged deliveries I used to get was incredibly annoying, then couriers will not accept liability

Best three incidents I can remember were.

1) a desk valued at £600 being delivered should have been a two man delivery (what we paid for) was delivered by one man, two days late, he couldn’t Cary the large boxed item so as the client videos himbon his phone, literally rolled the box up end over end to the clients door and was surprised when he was told you can take that back.

Subsequently it was damaged beyond repair..

2) one courier delivering a piece of furniture couldn’t find anyone home so signed for it on behalf of the client and left it outside on a Main Street.

He was being watched by a neighbor and later denied this, but it didn’t stop someone pinching the package either..

3) large tv cabinet delivery to Scotland

Courier lost it, we drove upto the client our self and replaced it, two months later they tried to deliver the original!!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Novel way of flashing. But what made the idiot think an owner's dog might not have got out on the cunt?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

At least he delivered something I guess

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Cutting a hole in his jeans seems like overcomplicating things. There's a zip."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hermes make me so angry, they lost a guitar my hubby sold on eBay worth about a grand, no compensation

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By *ookMan
over a year ago

london

They do make nice scarves though...

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By *arkus1812Man
over a year ago

Lifes departure lounge NN9 Northamptonshire East not West MidlandsMidlands

"Hermes make me so angry, they lost a guitar my hubby sold on eBay worth about a grand, no compensation "

Hermes website states that musical instruments are sent at your own risk and not subject to compensation should they be lost or damaged, It pays to read the small print. All the parcels I send contain glass and are not covered so any loss or breakage I have to stand the loss.

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By *eviantdeeliteCouple
over a year ago

Cheltenham

"Cutting a hole in his jeans seems like overcomplicating things. There's a zip."

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

It isn’t always easy to catch Hermes.

Pretty easy to yodel though

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By *uke OzadeMan
over a year ago

Ho Chi Minge City

"They do make nice scarves though..."

That’s what I was thinking too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Well we all know how shit hermes are. "
This!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I swear this is true though I still can't quite believe it..

Years ago I moved to a new dept with the job I was going. During orientation I was told the person I was replacing had been dismissed for exposing himself at work. I wasn't quite sure why I needed to know this but I just nodded politely.

I was then shown a group photograph taken on a staff day out including a bloke with his willy hanging out of his trousers. Just.... So many questions beginning with why I didn't even know where to start. To this day I still can't quite believe it happened.

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By *est Wales WifeCouple
over a year ago

Near Carmarthen

Think a few people here need to watch the Ken Loach film "Sorry we Missed You" to get a few things in perspective.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Think a few people here need to watch the Ken Loach film "Sorry we Missed You" to get a few things in perspective."

I'll look it up. I love his films.

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By *ocbigMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

"It isn’t always easy to catch Hermes.

Pretty easy to yodel though

DPD though...thats different

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By *attb179Man
over a year ago

London

"It isn’t always easy to catch Hermes.

Pretty easy to yodel though

DPD though...thats different"

Dpd is a pleasure to use

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"i'm suprised he didn't just chuck it over the fence in the rain- then forge a signature, like they do with most parcels "

yes, OP this

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