FabSwingers.com forum: First messages

By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

Don't worry it's not another I'm been ignored thread.....

I know we are all indiduals with our own standards, preferences and reasons for been here, it's what makes the place so untidy, sorry special. Anyway I was brought up in a particular way and it has left a lasting impression on me. It means that one of the things I cannot do is send explicit messages to a stranger which means when I do send a message its usually either a compliment (but not a false one) or it's about something I have picked out of their profile that I think we may have in common. (I know I'm strange). So when I do get a reply (and I do sometimes) it's usually just a thank you which leaves me with no where to go. I can message back "you are welcome isn't the weather cold for this time of year?" or just accept the thank you as the courteous reply it is. So I suppose the question is do I get over myself and be more forward? Actually saying you look great I'd like to **** you or stop sending face pics with my first message?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It’s right, messaging on here isn’t an easy task!

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

As someone who is guilty of just saying thank you and that’s it, i’d encourage you to send at least one more message.

I personally think a fella is just complimenting a pic at the first message, and not interested. If he messages again the penny drops.

Try it. What have you got to lose?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As someone who is guilty of just saying thank you and that’s it, i’d encourage you to send at least one more message.

I personally think a fella is just complimenting a pic at the first message, and not interested. If he messages again the penny drops.

Try it. What have you got to lose?"

Haha when we’re being cussed out and blocked for double messaging I’m going to say Luna told me it was ok.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

We are always more than happy with a simple, hi I’m (insert name) feel free to message back.

If we like them we will.

What we don’t like is a load of dick pics or somebody’s fantasy of what they WILL do to the wife.

We expect people to treat us as they’d treat us in the street, I.e. just say hi!

That said some just don’t care.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"As someone who is guilty of just saying thank you and that’s it, i’d encourage you to send at least one more message.

I personally think a fella is just complimenting a pic at the first message, and not interested. If he messages again the penny drops.

Try it. What have you got to lose?"

Luna, you are not guilty of anything. I'm sure most men here feel as I do and are grateful that you read their message and took the time to reply. From my own experience though I would imagine most men who do compliment you are the same as me and looking for a way to interact. I doubt I'm not the only one who is Internet shy here.

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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago

"We are always more than happy with a simple, hi I’m (insert name) feel free to message back.

If we like them we will.

What we don’t like is a load of dick pics or somebody’s fantasy of what they WILL do to the wife.

We expect people to treat us as they’d treat us in the street, I.e. just say hi!

That said some just don’t care. "

Never thought of keeping it so simple. Thank you for that.

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By *sm265Woman
over a year ago

Shangri-la

A polite, friendly message that shows they have taken the time to read my profile & that shows a bit of personality is appreciated. Doesn't need to be a novel but a bit more than just "hi".

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

"As someone who is guilty of just saying thank you and that’s it, i’d encourage you to send at least one more message.

I personally think a fella is just complimenting a pic at the first message, and not interested. If he messages again the penny drops.

Try it. What have you got to lose?

Haha when we’re being cussed out and blocked for double messaging I’m going to say Luna told me it was ok.

If you get blocked for merely messaging twice then it’s not really a loss is it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"As someone who is guilty of just saying thank you and that’s it, i’d encourage you to send at least one more message.

I personally think a fella is just complimenting a pic at the first message, and not interested. If he messages again the penny drops.

Try it. What have you got to lose?

Haha when we’re being cussed out and blocked for double messaging I’m going to say Luna told me it was ok.

If you get blocked for merely messaging twice then it’s not really a loss is it?

Not really I suppose no.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Maybe try asking a question too which could lead to more engaging conversation if they chose to?

And no, you don't seem strange.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit

Thing is OP it's about finding the right balance between sending a simple compliment in a fairly closed statement that invites nothing more than a "Thank you" and sending something too "full on"

I rarely send cold messages to users I've not interacted with in some way e.g. on the forums, but when I have done in the past I've always tried to put a couple of open questions in there, along with compliments and a little about myself and why I'm writing - it gives the recipient something more to go on, in the same way as you'd like something more to go on than a "Thank you" if they reply

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Maybe try asking a question too which could lead to more engaging conversation if they chose to?

And no, you don't seem strange. "
à

this. Online conversations aren't that easy so sometimes needs a bit of work to get the ball rolling (and to keep it rolling).

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By *jb773Man
over a year ago

Bishops Stortford

Ive tried every kind of message, i am alway polite and introduce myself, but every woman i have messaged never replly back

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