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Second chances

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No chance. My time is too precious to be wasted.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a chance, I’m never a second option

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By *oodnitegirlWoman
over a year ago

Yorkshire

I’d like to say none but I’m soft.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Had it done a few times. I think it depends if they made an effort to cancel in advance with a decent reason.

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By *octor RobMan
over a year ago

urmston

None , each to there own but you ladies have so many options why would you ?

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire

not a chance in hell

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By *uriousscouserWoman
over a year ago

Wirral

If they don't turn up and don't bother to cancel? Nope, no second chance.

If they cancel in reasonable time with a reasonable reason I'm a bit more persuadable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

None normally unless they have a damn good reason. But 2nd attempt we'd definitely have a plan b (club etc)

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By *ig1gaz1Man
over a year ago

bradford

No second chance, Unless good enough reason out of your control.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)

Never.

If they cancel by mail in good time, then another chance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No second chance. Times precious, i wont be messed about in any way.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I’d like to say none but I’m soft. "

I'm similar but trying not to let people walk all over me these days.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

1% chance.

If I discovered that they'd had an accident or something I'd reconsdider.

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By *naswingdressWoman
over a year ago

Manchester (she/her)


"1% chance.

If I discovered that they'd had an accident or something I'd reconsdider."

Yes, true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Unlikely but possible with a good reason.

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Depends how genuine I thought their excuse was.

But I'm probably too nice.

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By *juk72Man
over a year ago

Reading

Unless they are incapacitated there is very little reason not to take 1min to send a message.

So very unlikely.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"1% chance.

If I discovered that they'd had an accident or something I'd reconsdider."

Same here.

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By *inkysexpotMan
over a year ago

leeds

If like to say not a chance but it depends on circumstances and how much effort they out into rearranging.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I dont meet but if i did i always went rule of 3 aka 3 strikes your out

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

None my times very valuable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not a chance, I’m never a second option "

Exactly this.

I had meet arranged in Edinburgh for Saturday evening. The guy messaged in the afternoon to say he was meeting someone else but would let me know if that falls through

Oh ok I said and wished him luck, but also reminded him that I won't be anyones back up plan so despite my plans falling through I would be unavailable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Zero chance.

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

I'll tell you in the next 24 hours

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By *riar BelisseWoman
over a year ago

Delightful Bliss

None for one offs or new

Lots for my friends, sometimes shit happens...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not a chance, I’m never a second option

Exactly this.

I had meet arranged in Edinburgh for Saturday evening. The guy messaged in the afternoon to say he was meeting someone else but would let me know if that falls through

Oh ok I said and wished him luck, but also reminded him that I won't be anyones back up plan so despite my plans falling through I would be unavailable

"

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll tell you in the next 24 hours "

Okay

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No idea. Never been given the first one

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

No chance .

Unless its Kelly Brook

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I have done and they never deserve it

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

I'd give them the benefit of doubt to begin with, after that nada.

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By *osie xWoman
over a year ago

wolverhampton

Nope if no call beforehand.

It’s rude

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By *ady23Woman
over a year ago

Coventry


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

Possibly none. If an apology or explanation comes through then may give benefit of the doubt to them but after 2nd chance it's gone

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My (her) interest in that person would diminish quickly and no second chances would be offered. We would have no intention to be rude or nasty, but once the fun bubble bursts for whatever reason the interest is gone.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

If they cancel in advance and give a reason, one more chance. A no show wouldn't get a second chance from me.

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

Zero chance, because I have added them to my "block" list by now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I have done and they never deserve it "

Been there. Gave a second chance to be let down again

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

If they then messaged to explain with a plausible excuse, maybe. Otherwise no.

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS
over a year ago

doncaster

I find I very often give 2nd 3rd chances ,I'm either too soft or too desperate haha

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By *forfun500Couple
over a year ago

walsall

Depends on their situation could they have been in an accident on the way

Or a family member rushed to hospital

or something like that. The last thing on their mind would be to message to cancel

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Depends on their situation could they have been in an accident on the way

Or a family member rushed to hospital

or something like that. The last thing on their mind would be to message to cancel"

There true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

What would you say “cancelling within reasonable time” would be?

I just worry as I’ve been known to have panic attacks at just going down to the corner shop or local chippy before now, which are largely out of my control.

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By *rotic-TouchTV/TS
over a year ago

doncaster


"What would you say “cancelling within reasonable time” would be?

I just worry as I’ve been known to have panic attacks at just going down to the corner shop or local chippy before now, which are largely out of my control."
if a guy explained such difficulties before hand then I would understand and try and support him ,give him the chances that he needs

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What would you say “cancelling within reasonable time” would be?

I just worry as I’ve been known to have panic attacks at just going down to the corner shop or local chippy before now, which are largely out of my control.if a guy explained such difficulties before hand then I would understand and try and support him ,give him the chances that he needs "

Thank you. That’s actually very lovely of you. People doing things like that help soothe the anxiety away and make it genuinely easier x

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"What would you say “cancelling within reasonable time” would be?

I just worry as I’ve been known to have panic attacks at just going down to the corner shop or local chippy before now, which are largely out of my control."

I wouldn't mind if he actually text before I left the house or at all

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By *hoenixAdAstraWoman
over a year ago

Hiding in the shadows


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

Quite simply, I don't.

I've managed to avoid no shows, but being ghosted is all to common.

I have limited free time, I've had occasions, chat with someone, I'm not free that week or even the next, chat goes on, all OK.

Social arranged, then 2/3 days before, radio silence.

Send a message the night before, nothing, unread even though they've been online.

If I haven't heard from them by the lunch time, then they're blocked.

I've had quite a few, who would reappear a few weeks later, with some lame excuse, or not even acknowledge they've basically ignored me & assume I'll be overjoyed they've decided to re contact me.

So now I just block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not a chance...

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?

Quite simply, I don't.

I've managed to avoid no shows, but being ghosted is all to common.

I have limited free time, I've had occasions, chat with someone, I'm not free that week or even the next, chat goes on, all OK.

Social arranged, then 2/3 days before, radio silence.

Send a message the night before, nothing, unread even though they've been online.

If I haven't heard from them by the lunch time, then they're blocked.

I've had quite a few, who would reappear a few weeks later, with some lame excuse, or not even acknowledge they've basically ignored me & assume I'll be overjoyed they've decided to re contact me.

So now I just block.

"

Probably best.

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

Anyone can change their mind. I understand that.

All I ask is for a message to let me know.

I can respect someone who does that. The reason is irrelevant.

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By *orthern StarsCouple
over a year ago

Durham

If we found out that there was a very valid reason then we maybe would, but it was have to be a damn good reason.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Slim to none depending on things like how far I've had to travel and what their excuse was, if any.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If we found out that there was a very valid reason then we maybe would, but it was have to be a damn good reason."

Yah it would.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What would you say “cancelling within reasonable time” would be?

I just worry as I’ve been known to have panic attacks at just going down to the corner shop or local chippy before now, which are largely out of my control.

I wouldn't mind if he actually text before I left the house or at all"

Thank you. That’s reassuring to know people are okay like that x

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By *ady PaulaWoman
over a year ago

bradford

One chance only, my time is valuable to me

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By *ohohoWoman
over a year ago

Up North

Depends on the reason why. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Depends on the reason why. I like to give people the benefit of the doubt. "

I try to but it's not always easy.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No second chance. Times precious, i wont be messed about in any way."

Not even if their granny died

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Zero

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By *pursChick aka ShortieWoman
over a year ago

On a mooch

Not a second thought

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They should be thanking their lucky stars I've agreed to meet them in the first place, to stand me up would be madness!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends on how much notice was given and their ‘excuse’

Once chance I reckon

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I probably would give them a second chance. Because if I arrange to meet someone, its because I already feel like I'm really into them and that doesn't come along often.. So yeah I'd try again.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not likely at all

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"They should be thanking their lucky stars I've agreed to meet them in the first place, to stand me up would be madness! "

Love it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If they contact prior then fair enough. I know myself I've been called into work on many occasions at very short notice. B has a job where we hardly know where he will be or for how long, so again work dictates. Is it a pain? Yes. However I don't believe we're the only people with jobs that can be unpredictable so I appreciate others may be in the exact same boat.

Communication.

P

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If they contact prior then fair enough. I know myself I've been called into work on many occasions at very short notice. B has a job where we hardly know where he will be or for how long, so again work dictates. Is it a pain? Yes. However I don't believe we're the only people with jobs that can be unpredictable so I appreciate others may be in the exact same boat.

Communication.

P"

If they don't mail till a few days after though. Would it bother ye?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Never

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If they contact prior then fair enough. I know myself I've been called into work on many occasions at very short notice. B has a job where we hardly know where he will be or for how long, so again work dictates. Is it a pain? Yes. However I don't believe we're the only people with jobs that can be unpredictable so I appreciate others may be in the exact same boat.

Communication.

P

If they don't mail till a few days after though. Would it bother ye?"

Days after? I'd quite probably remind them that although I'm a laid back motherfucker who appreciates shit happens, I'm not a mug and I deserve the respect I'd have given them in whatever situation arose and would have let them know, so on that basis we aren't compatible as our priorities, respect levels and morals are cut from different clothage.

P

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit

Not at all

If they can't let me know,there would be no more chances

I would probably just block.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If she has a reasonable excuse then yes.Shit happens. .

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not a chance, I’m never a second option

Exactly this.

I had meet arranged in Edinburgh for Saturday evening. The guy messaged in the afternoon to say he was meeting someone else but would let me know if that falls through

Oh ok I said and wished him luck, but also reminded him that I won't be anyones back up plan so despite my plans falling through I would be unavailable

"

Good for you! I guess he was honest but what a lizard

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not at all

If they can't let me know,there would be no more chances

I would probably just block."

What a reasonable amount of time to let you know ?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not at all

If they can't let me know,there would be no more chances

I would probably just block.

What a reasonable amount of time to let you know ?"

Would depend on the circumstance and whether you got the gut feeling they're taking the piss, are you already friends etc.

That's my take on it anyway.

P

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Not at all

If they can't let me know,there would be no more chances

I would probably just block.

What a reasonable amount of time to let you know ?

Would depend on the circumstance and whether you got the gut feeling they're taking the piss, are you already friends etc.

That's my take on it anyway.

P"

But I'd expect to know beforehand. Friends I've already met and stuff I'd forgive and give another chance. Me and one of my mates would often have stuff crop up on the day, finishing late at work etc so we'd message and let each other know we need to take a rain check. It's no biggie if you know that might be a possibility already.

P

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not at all

If they can't let me know,there would be no more chances

I would probably just block.

What a reasonable amount of time to let you know ?

Would depend on the circumstance and whether you got the gut feeling they're taking the piss, are you already friends etc.

That's my take on it anyway.

P"

That's very true and a mature way of looking at it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

No cancellation and no show = no chance.

With cancellation depends on reason but very slim chance.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Depends how good the communication is. Shit happens If it’s timely and there appears to be a genuine reason then I don’t have a problem. From experience, I now get a sense of when I’m being messed around or if people are saying one thing and then doing another. If either is the case I knock it on the head.

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By *ustBoWoman
over a year ago

Somewhere in Co. Down

They don't get a second chance if they just don't turn up. No way once was enough if they can't take a few seconds to send a message and cancel then they are not worth giving a second chance to.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?

No cancellation and no show = no chance.

With cancellation depends on reason but very slim chance."

What excuse would you accept?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?

No cancellation and no show = no chance.

With cancellation depends on reason but very slim chance.

What excuse would you accept?"

Depends how well you know that person I guess

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?

No cancellation and no show = no chance.

With cancellation depends on reason but very slim chance.

What excuse would you accept?

Depends how well you know that person I guess"

True.

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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago

Calderdale innit


"Not at all

If they can't let me know,there would be no more chances

I would probably just block.

What a reasonable amount of time to let you know ?"

A couple of hours before ,i know people have lives and things happen so i'd understand

Being stood up not so much

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Not at all

If they can't let me know,there would be no more chances

I would probably just block.

What a reasonable amount of time to let you know ?

A couple of hours before ,i know people have lives and things happen so i'd understand

Being stood up not so much"

Yah if they let you know it's not so bad.

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough

No second chances for a No Show with no message to explain why

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

No chance. They would be blocked anyway. I dont suffer fools lightly

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By *ackinabox19Man
over a year ago

Harrogate

If I had built up enough trust and connection with them and believed the reason behind it I would definitely, however it doesn’t take long to send a quick polite message explaining.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"No second chances for a No Show with no message to explain why"

It's the not messaging part that would bother me.

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By *udistnorthantsMan
over a year ago

Desborough


"No second chances for a No Show with no message to explain why

It's the not messaging part that would bother me."

I don't mind if a Fabber cancels a meet, no matter how short notice. It's not sending a brief message that's inexcusable.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If I had built up enough trust and connection with them and believed the reason behind it I would definitely, however it doesn’t take long to send a quick polite message explaining. "

True

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By *m3232Man
over a year ago

maidenhead


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

The first time it’s there fault the second time it’s your fault.

No reply to tell you before hand should be a instant ban imo.

I have the same policy at work no show with no reply they are banned.

It takes 10seconds to send a simple text

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

No second chances under those circumstances

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By *ainyDaySunshineMan
over a year ago

Ayrshire


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

Nope. No chance.

No excuses not to mail

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"
I'd give you a second chance but thats it

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By *hubaysiWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

I gave a chap 4 chances owing to his job and family issues, on the 4th he played cat and mouse with me so I blocked him!

Time too precious for that!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I gave a chap 4 chances owing to his job and family issues, on the 4th he played cat and mouse with me so I blocked him!

Time too precious for that! "
awwww poor guy

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By *nnocentimesMan
over a year ago

over there by that tree

I used to agree with no 2nd chances as the OP posted, but then I did it....

I was set to have a lunch time social, my daughters school called me at around 10:00 and said that she had broken her leg and was on the way to Hospital with a teacher in an ambulance.

Mind went blank - dad mode kicked in and I was gone....

Things do happen in the “real world” outside of fab, sometimes that super hot meet you have planned is the last thing on your mind!

Thankfully the lady in question was very understanding, thus I now give the benefit of the doubt on the first one - miss 2 and nope you’re blocked.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?

The first time it’s there fault the second time it’s your fault.

No reply to tell you before hand should be a instant ban imo.

I have the same policy at work no show with no reply they are banned.

It takes 10seconds to send a simple text"

It's so true.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Zero.

Our time is way too limited for any timewasters.

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By *itty9899Man
over a year ago

Craggy Island


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

None, zip, zero, zilch.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Zero.

Our time is way too limited for any timewasters."

I'm the same. Fine it very hard to get time away

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By *ady PaulaWoman
over a year ago

bradford


"I gave a chap 4 chances owing to his job and family issues, on the 4th he played cat and mouse with me so I blocked him!

Time too precious for that! "

He would have to be Tom Cruise for me to give anyone a second chance lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Quick note.

If I lost my phone I'd be fucked. I don't have peoples numbers memorized and I don't have a laptop or anything to access fab on. I couldn't afford a new one out of nowhere either so I'd be buggered in getting hold if someone to let them know.

P

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

Always give a second chance cos some things do pop up that can't be controlled but do it again and I ain't interested any more even if you are banging hot

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I gave a chap 4 chances owing to his job and family issues, on the 4th he played cat and mouse with me so I blocked him!

Time too precious for that!

He would have to be Tom Cruise for me to give anyone a second chance lol "

Tom cruise is to small

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If the meet was real resl hot, most people would give them a secomd chance, no?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If the meet was real resl hot, most people would give them a secomd chance, no?"

Well if you hadn't met already.

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By *xtrafun4youMan
over a year ago

Dunstable


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"
0 no way, done!!!! I never give 2nd chances

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A second? Sure. Shit happens.

A third? Nah.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I'm actually undecided at the moment. I'll let you know what I decide.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

I did once when the guy got in touch 3 weeks later and apologised saying he'd been nervous. I admired the guts it took for him to get back in touch again, and when we did meet we had a really great night. It was a lesson in not letting my ego override the better decision to give someone a second chance xx

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it?"

Never

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"How likely are you to give people a second chance if they don't turn up for a meet and don't mail to cancel it? 0 no way, done!!!! I never give 2nd chances "

Even with a very good excuse

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field


"I'll tell you in the next 24 hours

Okay "

Answer was yes

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I'll tell you in the next 24 hours

Okay

Answer was yes "

Good on you.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

i did give a woman a second chance a couple of years back she lived in Nantwich which is a fair trek for me i booked a room, she didn't show and didn't message me until about 11pm she said she was nervous i said I'm a nice guy meet me now we'll have a drink she said no lol so obviously i cut contact with her about 4 months later she apologised and said can we try again i said ok once again i travelled to Nantwich to meet in a pub 2.5 hours after arranged meet time no sign of her lol she did however turn up and realised she had no reason to be nervous we met for a while

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By *omesticated_VixenWoman
over a year ago

sw London

I always meet in a club that way if they don’t turn up my night isn’t ruined and if they do even better

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I always meet in a club that way if they don’t turn up my night isn’t ruined and if they do even better"
clubs are expensive for guys would never do a first meet in a club

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