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Kink shaming

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago

If someone asks for opinions on a certain kink, how is it 'kink shaming' if people say they find it creepy? It is their opinion and feelings.

If someone is secure within themselves how can another person's opinion 'shame' them - unless they already feel shame and the other person voicing their opinion brings their guilt/ shame to the surface.

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By *icecouple561Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

East Sussex

I agree to an extent. However a lot of people are insecure in their sexuality and are really looking for someone to tell them its ok to be the way they are. I don't think that's wrong

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Saying that find it creepy, or disturbing, or off putting, is fine - that's just a statement of you're own reaction to it.

Saying that someone should stop doing it, or feel ashamed of doing it, because of that reaction is another matter.

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe

I think describing them as creepy or gross etc could be seen as kink shaming.

Just because it isn't for you, there's no need to be unpleasant.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dear lord

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dear lord "

Yes?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I agree to an extent. However a lot of people are insecure in their sexuality and are really looking for someone to tell them its ok to be the way they are. I don't think that's wrong"

Often people are pleasantly surprised that they aren't the only person that likes XYZ.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Dear lord "

What?

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port

It definitely happens on here. Any person's kink may not appeal to everyone but to refer to them as "creepy" is going too far. It's like the discussion on here recently about school uniforms, they aren't something I am into, but by the thread some people that expressed an interest in this area were being called paedos. The thread had to get taken down in the end.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion. "

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think describing them as creepy or gross etc could be seen as kink shaming.

Just because it isn't for you, there's no need to be unpleasant. "

It's like when someone insults you, it's your choice whether to accept the insult. Online I think it's simple to brush off the insult made by an unknown because it cannot be personal.

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling

This has been answered many times over many threads in quite some detail.

Unfortunately my own fucks are about to run out so I shall not be looking to provide you with the answers you seek but I suggest you go search for the answers already given as you may find some enlightenment to your unpleasant attitude.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject."

Or just think, that's not for me and move on.. Why feel you need to comment at all (OP)?

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

What if their kink is illegal? Is it ok to criticise it then?

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By *uenevereWoman
over a year ago

Scunthorpe


"I think describing them as creepy or gross etc could be seen as kink shaming.

Just because it isn't for you, there's no need to be unpleasant.

It's like when someone insults you, it's your choice whether to accept the insult. Online I think it's simple to brush off the insult made by an unknown because it cannot be personal. "

Unfortunately, not everyone is able to just brush it off.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

People always love to kink shame, crack on is all we can say, it doesn’t bother us

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject."

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"This has been answered many times over many threads in quite some detail.

Unfortunately my own fucks are about to run out so I shall not be looking to provide you with the answers you seek but I suggest you go search for the answers already given as you may find some enlightenment to your unpleasant attitude. "

Is this comment at me? How is asking questions unpleasant?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What if their kink is illegal? Is it ok to criticise it then? "

I wonder this too....

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

Or just think, that's not for me and move on.. Why feel you need to comment at all (OP)? "

Agreed - while I accept it's an open forum and people are entitled to comment, I often wonder why people feel the need to comment on something that is not for them - see it often on BDSM discussion threads where there will invariably be a number of posters whose only contribution is to make derogatory remarks on the subject by way of saying it's not for them - which to me seems pretty pointless

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

Or just think, that's not for me and move on.. Why feel you need to comment at all (OP)? "

My question is about when people ask for opinions. Not when people are looking for others who also enjoy XYZ.

If they are asking for opinions why shouldn't people comment?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman
over a year ago

little house on the praire


"What if their kink is illegal? Is it ok to criticise it then? "
if it was illegal then it would be taken of the forum

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman
over a year ago

evesham


"If someone asks for opinions on a certain kink, how is it 'kink shaming' if people say they find it creepy? It is their opinion and feelings.

If someone is secure within themselves how can another person's opinion 'shame' them - unless they already feel shame and the other person voicing their opinion brings their guilt/ shame to the surface."

It's the way the opinion is aired. Saying 'iys not for me' is fine. Saying 'its creepy' or 'its sick' 'they must be a pedo' etc...not so much.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"

Or just think, that's not for me and move on.. Why feel you need to comment at all (OP)?

Agreed - while I accept it's an open forum and people are entitled to comment, I often wonder why people feel the need to comment on something that is not for them - see it often on BDSM discussion threads where there will invariably be a number of posters whose only contribution is to make derogatory remarks on the subject by way of saying it's not for them - which to me seems pretty pointless "

Yep... As you can tell there have been a couple today... One clearly a sh*t stirring thread which seems unwilling to die lol

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What if their kink is illegal? Is it ok to criticise it then? if it was illegal then it would be taken of the forum"

Nope. Posts with discussions about flashing have not been removed.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What if their kink is illegal? Is it ok to criticise it then? "

They wouldn't be able to post about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think describing them as creepy or gross etc could be seen as kink shaming.

Just because it isn't for you, there's no need to be unpleasant.

It's like when someone insults you, it's your choice whether to accept the insult. Online I think it's simple to brush off the insult made by an unknown because it cannot be personal.

Unfortunately, not everyone is able to just brush it off."

It is something that can be learned.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject? "

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"What if their kink is illegal? Is it ok to criticise it then?

They wouldn't be able to post about it. "

But people do post about exposing their genitals in public.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Most sites like this have subjects that aren't allowed to be discussed including fetishes that involve illegal acts. I continue to be amazed at the things people find exciting and not always in a good way. But I never think of it as immoral or them as being wrong to do it. And even though sometimes I do want to vom in my mouth I'd never ever say so. Firstly cos it's not a nice thing to do. And secondly cos who gives a fuck what I think? My overriding reaction to this has always been to feel for someone who has a kink that it's hard to talk about and to hope they find someone they can share with. No-one bats an eyelid if I tell them I love being spanked, they're intrigued or indifferent. I'm lucky.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"What if their kink is illegal? Is it ok to criticise it then? "

Well spanking enough to leave a mark is technically illegal.

Of course some things are more cut and dry. If someone has a kink for murder or something then yes.

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place

I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

Or just think, that's not for me and move on.. Why feel you need to comment at all (OP)?

My question is about when people ask for opinions. Not when people are looking for others who also enjoy XYZ.

If they are asking for opinions why shouldn't people comment?"

I've posted in the past looking for other people into something I am and the thread just got filled up with horrible comments from people who weren't. When I asked for only those interested in the subject to comment I was told I can't police who can comment. That's when I gave up bothering to post about anything serious on here.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Most sites like this have subjects that aren't allowed to be discussed including fetishes that involve illegal acts. I continue to be amazed at the things people find exciting and not always in a good way. But I never think of it as immoral or them as being wrong to do it. And even though sometimes I do want to vom in my mouth I'd never ever say so. Firstly cos it's not a nice thing to do. And secondly cos who gives a fuck what I think? My overriding reaction to this has always been to feel for someone who has a kink that it's hard to talk about and to hope they find someone they can share with. No-one bats an eyelid if I tell them I love being spanked, they're intrigued or indifferent. I'm lucky. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

Or just think, that's not for me and move on.. Why feel you need to comment at all (OP)?

My question is about when people ask for opinions. Not when people are looking for others who also enjoy XYZ.

If they are asking for opinions why shouldn't people comment?

I've posted in the past looking for other people into something I am and the thread just got filled up with horrible comments from people who weren't. When I asked for only those interested in the subject to comment I was told I can't police who can comment. That's when I gave up bothering to post about anything serious on here."

That's a shame and all our loss

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people. "

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Dear lord

Yes? "

Sweet baby jesus with a small baby j.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I love kinky stuff... Why should I be made to feel bad about it just cos someone else doesn't like it?

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By *VineMan
over a year ago

The right place


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting. "

I’m with you on that. I think deliberately exposing yourself to people that haven’t consented is out of order. And people should be called out on it.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting. "

Personally I've never agreed with including non-consenting bystanders in my kinks.

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting. "

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

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By *aitonelMan
over a year ago

Travelling


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

I’m with you on that. I think deliberately exposing yourself to people that haven’t consented is out of order. And people should be called out on it. "

If it involves additional parties that have not given consent for whatever act, kink, sexual interest etc then they should be called out on it properly - still doesn't need to go the route of, at least initially, shaming.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging? "

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting. "

I'd disagree that it doesn't go unchallenged - the majority of "flashing" threads I have seen usually have a good number of people challenging the person that is promoting it

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging? "

I remember a thread a guy had posted about driving around with her partner, pulling over as if to ask someone for directions and flashing them before driving off. The response was a mix of people condemning it and others saying it's hot.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section. "

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

I remember a thread a guy had posted about driving around with her partner, pulling over as if to ask someone for directions and flashing them before driving off. The response was a mix of people condemning it and others saying it's hot."

I'd have called the police

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums "

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves "

Thank you. I've just done it. Honestly I'm shocked. It doesn't make it any less illegal just because it's a woman. The mods really do need to clamp down on this.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

Thank you. I've just done it. Honestly I'm shocked. It doesn't make it any less illegal just because it's a woman. The mods really do need to clamp down on this. "

There was another one as well about flashing your milkman or postman or something. I got into a heated debate on there about the legalities of it. Someone was insisting no offence has been committed if the person exposing themselves is not visibly aroused at the time. I was shocked at the lack of knowledge and understanding of this type of behaviour and the legal and ethical issues around consent. This is an adult sex site - that lack of knowledge is a serious concern imo.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

My postman is a delightful middle aged carribbean gentleman who would tell to me to behave myself. And who the fuck has a milkman any more? I do get that this kind of thing is exciting but that's not an excuse for being inconsiderate and basically using people to get your rocks off. Just put your bits away til someone asks to see them ffs. Don't fuck in public places and ruin some poor sods day when he's just trying to walk his dog. Your orgssm isn't his problem.

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By *ophieslutTV/TS
over a year ago

Central

It's always about the context, where comments are added, as well as the content. Often it's reasonable to consider what value we are adding, when we contribute to discussions. We each have impact upon others and most people are endowed with sufficient levels of empathy, such that they will be able to appreciate how they may affect others.

It's generally unpleasant to shame others, especially in a very public area. There's no need for it, if we're discussing legal, consensual activities in particular.

Be thoughtful and mindful that it's sometimes easier to stifle people being honest, when our environment can benefit from people being open and free to be themselves. We can be this, whilst maintaining our consideration for others and sustaining a great forum, that's compassionate and a great place for us all.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"My postman is a delightful middle aged carribbean gentleman who would tell to me to behave myself. And who the fuck has a milkman any more? I do get that this kind of thing is exciting but that's not an excuse for being inconsiderate and basically using people to get your rocks off. Just put your bits away til someone asks to see them ffs. Don't fuck in public places and ruin some poor sods day when he's just trying to walk his dog. Your orgssm isn't his problem. "

Brilliant response

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves "

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself."

When people have given reasons why they don't like certain things they usually get slated and told their preference is an 'ism. So possibly why they don't give reasons anymore.

Them not giving a reason doesn't necessarily mean they are ignorant.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

I’m with you on that. I think deliberately exposing yourself to people that haven’t consented is out of order. And people should be called out on it.

If it involves additional parties that have not given consent for whatever act, kink, sexual interest etc then they should be called out on it properly - still doesn't need to go the route of, at least initially, shaming. "

What's the difference?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

"

So you think it's acceptable to have a forum thread about men flashing themselves to women?

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

Thank you. I've just done it. Honestly I'm shocked. It doesn't make it any less illegal just because it's a woman. The mods really do need to clamp down on this.

There was another one as well about flashing your milkman or postman or something. I got into a heated debate on there about the legalities of it. Someone was insisting no offence has been committed if the person exposing themselves is not visibly aroused at the time. I was shocked at the lack of knowledge and understanding of this type of behaviour and the legal and ethical issues around consent. This is an adult sex site - that lack of knowledge is a serious concern imo. "

Would that be considered kink shaming?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Not everyone that speaks of their kinks are that secure in them, then being told here they are actually a bit grubby and disgusting for even considering it, can I imagine make them feel terrible when there is no reason too. It is just a kink.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

SBBW is a kink.

Saying "i don't fancy SBBW women" isn't shaming anyone.

Saying "SBBW women make me want to " is, imo, shaming.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"SBBW is a kink.

Saying "i don't fancy SBBW women" isn't shaming anyone.

Saying "SBBW women make me want to " is, imo, shaming. "

If a man says "I don't fancy SSBW women", some women still get irate.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

So you think it's acceptable to have a forum thread about men flashing themselves to women? "

If this was a women's institute forum, no. However this is a swinger's sorry, WAS a swinger's forum, most of what is written is fantasy. I wouldn't get my frilly knickers in a twist about it.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"SBBW is a kink.

Saying "i don't fancy SBBW women" isn't shaming anyone.

Saying "SBBW women make me want to " is, imo, shaming.

If a man says "I don't fancy SSBW women", some women still get irate."

Yep, there's no need to say it at all. But it's not "shaming", just uncalled for.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself.

When people have given reasons why they don't like certain things they usually get slated and told their preference is an 'ism. So possibly why they don't give reasons anymore.

Them not giving a reason doesn't necessarily mean they are ignorant. "

*IF* people have given reasons (which in over three years of being here they invariably don't in my experience) for not liking something and are slated for it (as opposed to having a counter opinion provided) then the slaters are obviously wrong.

Still doesn't mean that dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

So you think it's acceptable to have a forum thread about men flashing themselves to women?

If this was a women's institute forum, no. However this is a swinger's sorry, WAS a swinger's forum, most of what is written is fantasy. I wouldn't get my frilly knickers in a twist about it."

A lot of people on here definitely get their knickers in a twist over my fantasies.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

"

Nothing melting here I can assure you

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

So you think it's acceptable to have a forum thread about men flashing themselves to women?

If this was a women's institute forum, no. However this is a swinger's sorry, WAS a swinger's forum, most of what is written is fantasy. I wouldn't get my frilly knickers in a twist about it."

Since when has swinging ever been about illegal activity? I've experience of a flasher, I was with my ex wife, her children and their children. He was mssturbating in a car. It certainly was distressing thank you very much. We called the police and he got arrested and later a suspended sentence. So, yes, I do get my "frilly knickers" in a twist over it.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

So you think it's acceptable to have a forum thread about men flashing themselves to women?

If this was a women's institute forum, no. However this is a swinger's sorry, WAS a swinger's forum, most of what is written is fantasy. I wouldn't get my frilly knickers in a twist about it.

A lot of people on here definitely get their knickers in a twist over my fantasies."

It's ridiculous. Pissing their knickers over the slightest thing. It's fucking boring.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Well if we follow your way of thinking from other thread....

Saying your opinion about surgery means that you are unsecure ...so saying your opinion about someone else's kink also mean that you are unsecure.

Have some consistency in your way of thinking please.

It is becoming tiring to read the inconsistency in your pseudo intellectual question.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT


"Well if we follow your way of thinking from other thread....

Saying your opinion about surgery means that you are unsecure ...so saying your opinion about someone else's kink also mean that you are unsecure.

Have some consistency in your way of thinking please.

It is becoming tiring to read the inconsistency in your pseudo intellectual question. "

Who?

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By *he riverdeep69Couple
over a year ago

North west ish


"Well if we follow your way of thinking from other thread....

Saying your opinion about surgery means that you are unsecure ...so saying your opinion about someone else's kink also mean that you are unsecure.

Have some consistency in your way of thinking please.

It is becoming tiring to read the inconsistency in your pseudo intellectual question. "

Why be so personal? She is asking a genuine question that people have opinions on and is providing a good discussion. Absolutely no need to get personal in your comments. If you don't like a thread nobody is forcing you to reply.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shame ding a ling shame ding a ling

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

So you think it's acceptable to have a forum thread about men flashing themselves to women?

If this was a women's institute forum, no. However this is a swinger's sorry, WAS a swinger's forum, most of what is written is fantasy. I wouldn't get my frilly knickers in a twist about it.

A lot of people on here definitely get their knickers in a twist over my fantasies.

It's ridiculous. Pissing their knickers over the slightest thing. It's fucking boring."

Waving your cock about in front of strangers and children isn't the slightest thing. Forcing your kink on people who haven't consented isn't the slightest thing. It's sociopathic behaviour and needs to be challenged. You've got a point in that there are certainly people who are just looking to jump on the slightest thing and I agree 100% that it's fucking boring, it's also irritating, depressing and destructive. But I don't think it applies here. I'm all for people exploring, pushing boundaries, seizing the day etc. But you don't get to push other people's boundaries unless you ask first and make sure it's OK.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

This whole forum post needs Jell-O.

Always room for jello.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..

I think threads about things that are a criminal act - like flashing in public places, shouldn’t be allowed on here.

As for shaming - if I don’t like something then I will say so but I am always respectful. I usually just say it’s not for me. I accept we are all into different things and that’s fine.

The exception to that is bareback, I will speak out then. I don’t care if others do it, it’s nothing to do with me but don’t put my life at risk by lying to me about it and don’t pretend that it’s your right to put others at risk. It isn’t. It’s as simple as that and nobody is going to tell me that it’s right to keep something that could potentially be life threatening away from a person that they meet. I wouldn’t get in a car with a d*unk driver, for instance.

It’s not shaming someone it’s just setting my stall out about I feel about it. If you like bareback then please don’t approach me. I do think it’s shameful to knowingly put others at risk though.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

If someone names an act and asks for your opinion on it then it is fine to give that opinion whatever that opinion may be as long as it refers to the KINK and not to the person.

It's totally in order to say that an act is 'creepy' if you find it that way, although creepy is very subjective.

Simple solution : Don't ask if you don't really want to know opinions.

Simple solution: Ask only those you know will agree with you.

Simple solution : Read all opinions and shift your thinking or not - based on what you think of the feedback.

JUST STOP FUCKING WHINING IF SOMEONE DOESN'T FANCY STICKING CACTI UP THEIR JAPS EYE JUST COS YOU DO.

Oh ..... and if you do like it stop judging yourself.. Cos that's why you really ask ........co you are judging yourself anyway.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

It really depends on the kink. What's acceptable behaviour and what's a kink or even considered unacceptable changes with time.

Anal was once illegal and until quite recently considered taboo yet it's now considered little more than an extra thrill.

The opposite is the case for the shenanigans of 1970s TV presenters which in the 70s seemed to be frowned upon and in some countries are considered the norm even today yet today even mentioned the P word is unacceptable.

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman
over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

P.S. Don't DARE post shame me okay! Don't opinion shame me! Don't anything shame me! Just say i'm lubberly .....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone names an act and asks for your opinion on it then it is fine to give that opinion whatever that opinion may be as long as it refers to the KINK and not to the person.

It's totally in order to say that an act is 'creepy' if you find it that way, although creepy is very subjective.

Simple solution : Don't ask if you don't really want to know opinions.

Simple solution: Ask only those you know will agree with you.

Simple solution : Read all opinions and shift your thinking or not - based on what you think of the feedback.

JUST STOP FUCKING WHINING IF SOMEONE DOESN'T FANCY STICKING CACTI UP THEIR JAPS EYE JUST COS YOU DO.

Oh ..... and if you do like it stop judging yourself.. Cos that's why you really ask ........co you are judging yourself anyway."

Truth is in here. Much of it

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

..


"P.S. Don't DARE post shame me okay! Don't opinion shame me! Don't anything shame me! Just say i'm lubberly ..... "

You are lubberly

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Well if we follow your way of thinking from other thread....

Saying your opinion about surgery means that you are unsecure ...so saying your opinion about someone else's kink also mean that you are unsecure.

Have some consistency in your way of thinking please.

It is becoming tiring to read the inconsistency in your pseudo intellectual question. "

It was a question for discussion. You don't know what I think.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"It really depends on the kink. What's acceptable behaviour and what's a kink or even considered unacceptable changes with time.

Anal was once illegal and until quite recently considered taboo yet it's now considered little more than an extra thrill.

The opposite is the case for the shenanigans of 1970s TV presenters which in the 70s seemed to be frowned upon and in some countries are considered the norm even today yet today even mentioned the P word is unacceptable.

"

I agree, who decides it's normal/ ok or not.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"If someone names an act and asks for your opinion on it then it is fine to give that opinion whatever that opinion may be as long as it refers to the KINK and not to the person.

It's totally in order to say that an act is 'creepy' if you find it that way, although creepy is very subjective.

Simple solution : Don't ask if you don't really want to know opinions.

Simple solution: Ask only those you know will agree with you.

Simple solution : Read all opinions and shift your thinking or not - based on what you think of the feedback.

JUST STOP FUCKING WHINING IF SOMEONE DOESN'T FANCY STICKING CACTI UP THEIR JAPS EYE JUST COS YOU DO.

Oh ..... and if you do like it stop judging yourself.. Cos that's why you really ask ........co you are judging yourself anyway."

Got my cacti stuck.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself.

When people have given reasons why they don't like certain things they usually get slated and told their preference is an 'ism. So possibly why they don't give reasons anymore.

Them not giving a reason doesn't necessarily mean they are ignorant.

*IF* people have given reasons (which in over three years of being here they invariably don't in my experience) for not liking something and are slated for it (as opposed to having a counter opinion provided) then the slaters are obviously wrong.

Still doesn't mean that dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally."

What if they said they don't want to meet a bi man because they find the thought of two men having sex disgusting and a total turn off?

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By * and R cple4Couple
over a year ago

swansea


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself.

When people have given reasons why they don't like certain things they usually get slated and told their preference is an 'ism. So possibly why they don't give reasons anymore.

Them not giving a reason doesn't necessarily mean they are ignorant.

*IF* people have given reasons (which in over three years of being here they invariably don't in my experience) for not liking something and are slated for it (as opposed to having a counter opinion provided) then the slaters are obviously wrong.

Still doesn't mean that dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally.

What if they said they don't want to meet a bi man because they find the thought of two men having sex disgusting and a total turn off? "

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself.

When people have given reasons why they don't like certain things they usually get slated and told their preference is an 'ism. So possibly why they don't give reasons anymore.

Them not giving a reason doesn't necessarily mean they are ignorant.

*IF* people have given reasons (which in over three years of being here they invariably don't in my experience) for not liking something and are slated for it (as opposed to having a counter opinion provided) then the slaters are obviously wrong.

Still doesn't mean that dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally.

What if they said they don't want to meet a bi man because they find the thought of two men having sex disgusting and a total turn off? "

I'd say that's a perfectly valid opinion but would you call it "creepy"?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Since when is sexual orientation a kink? And no that’s not a valid opinion to raise in a forum... it’s something to keep to yourself. If you can’t say anything nice then don’t, if you can’t add anything of value then don’t. It would be great seeing politicians having debates like they do here...Liston I find it disgusting or don’t like something as a reason for anything. Mean time it’s just stooped in prejudice.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

Most of my thoughts on this matter have been expressed already on this thread by a few others, so i won’t repeat.

I’ll just say that it’s ok to have an opinion. But what has been happening on a lot of kink related threads is folk assuming and verbalising that the person with said kink in question is automatically a sex offender or a bad person.

What consenting adults like to do in the bedroom does not define who they are as people. Sometimes sex is just sex. No need to attribute sinister connotations to it.

That’s all i’ll say on the matter.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself.

When people have given reasons why they don't like certain things they usually get slated and told their preference is an 'ism. So possibly why they don't give reasons anymore.

Them not giving a reason doesn't necessarily mean they are ignorant.

*IF* people have given reasons (which in over three years of being here they invariably don't in my experience) for not liking something and are slated for it (as opposed to having a counter opinion provided) then the slaters are obviously wrong.

Still doesn't mean that dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally.

What if they said they don't want to meet a bi man because they find the thought of two men having sex disgusting and a total turn off? "

They provided a reason and a rationale, albeit a very loose and subjective one - and if that reason is their personal opinion and not one they are generalising and casting against all who do enjoy that "kink".

As I've said countless times before it's *how* something is expressed, not necessarily what is expressed that is the issue.

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"If someone asks for opinions on a certain kink, how is it 'kink shaming' if people say they find it creepy? It is their opinion and feelings.

If someone is secure within themselves how can another person's opinion 'shame' them - unless they already feel shame and the other person voicing their opinion brings their guilt/ shame to the surface."

Well said.

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford


"

dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally."

If this were the Oxford University Debating Societythen this might carry some merit. This forum is many things to many people who play by different rules and mainly within the rules. It's meant to be fun. Just take it for what it is and enjoy. Vivre la Difference..

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"

dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally.

If this were the Oxford University Debating Societythen this might carry some merit. This forum is many things to many people who play by different rules and mainly within the rules. It's meant to be fun. Just take it for what it is and enjoy. Vivre la Difference.."

Exactly. It's meant to be fun. Being called a paedophile, creepy, fucked up or having people say you must have been abused as a child isn't so fun.

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Belittling them and making them feel like they're doing something disgusting is really low way to behave. Call it kink shaming if you like. I call it being a cunt.

I agree if they are calling the person disgusting.

If asked for their opinion and they find the act/ kink disgusting then that is their opinion.

Calling something disgusting or creepy is more than just an opinion though - it's being quite derogatory.

If something is not to someone's taste that is of course fine but there are far more pleasant ways to express that than some of the derogatory terms that are bandied about - and often out of ignorance of the subject.

If they find it creepy what should they say?

People often use the 'ignorance' card. How do they know what experience that person has of the subject?

Usually the comment is something along the lines of "Oh god no, not for me it's creepy" nothing more nothing less - no validation of why they find it creepy, no contribution to the thread beyond that - which is what makes it derogatory and borders on, or becomes "kink shaming".

If they really *have* to contribute surely it would be far better to say "it's not for me" and leave it at that, or "while I accept that plenty enjoy it, I personally find it creepy because...." which actually contributes something to the discussion and provides reasoning rather than resorting to one line derogatory terms.

And it's not an ignorance "card" if someone has just dismissed something in the way I described, as is more often than not the case, because by dismissing something out of hand without reason, they are displaying ignorance in itself.

When people have given reasons why they don't like certain things they usually get slated and told their preference is an 'ism. So possibly why they don't give reasons anymore.

Them not giving a reason doesn't necessarily mean they are ignorant.

*IF* people have given reasons (which in over three years of being here they invariably don't in my experience) for not liking something and are slated for it (as opposed to having a counter opinion provided) then the slaters are obviously wrong.

Still doesn't mean that dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally.

What if they said they don't want to meet a bi man because they find the thought of two men having sex disgusting and a total turn off?

They provided a reason and a rationale, albeit a very loose and subjective one - and if that reason is their personal opinion and not one they are generalising and casting against all who do enjoy that "kink".

As I've said countless times before it's *how* something is expressed, not necessarily what is expressed that is the issue.

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

"

To be honest I would find the inclusion of disgusting unnecessary. Saying it's a big turn off for you is enough of a reason without having to include such a loaded word.

 (thread closed by moderator)

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By *emorefridaCouple
over a year ago

La la land


"Frankly this thread and the few from yesterday are exactly the reason why I don't discuss my kinks on here.

Not because I'm ashamed or insecure but because I can't be doing with the abuse dressed as personal opinion and passed as fact.

The simple fact is that it's not my job to educate people as to why I enjoy something. There should be a basis of respect in all of our dealings with others and that should be backed up by the mods. Both of which are severely lacking.

Time was that there could be a frank and open discussion about kinks and other things, without it descending into being said that a person is this or that for expressing a sexual preference that's outside of their perceived norm. These forums were a great tool for learning openly without judgement, I for one would rather people open their minds than their mouths. "

Exactly, really well put

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/11/19 09:13:49]

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

dismissing something out of hand without providing rationale behind that dismissal is right though and definitely displays a level of ignorance either of the subject or the ability to debate rationally.

If this were the Oxford University Debating Societythen this might carry some merit. This forum is many things to many people who play by different rules and mainly within the rules. It's meant to be fun. Just take it for what it is and enjoy. Vivre la Difference.."

No it carries merit regardless of the platform - yes this forum is many things to many people but underlying that should be respect, decency, consideration and lack of judgement for others because their preferences are "different" and sadly, all too often when it comes to that, people see the need to use derogatory terminology to express those differences and that fails to show respect, decency and consideration and does come down to ignorance whichever way you look at it.

As I have said several times throughout this thread - it's absolutely fine for people not to like something that I like, as you say "vive la difference", but if you don't please respect my preferences as I do yours - it really is that simple.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/11/19 09:13:52]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

If you don't like it, you're quite at liberty to ignore the forum if you can feel yourselves melting.

Nothing melting here I can assure you"

Nor here

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford


"

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

"

There is a difference although this is not an English lesson, it is a swinging site and the sentences to me are read with that context. Both say the same thing to me.

I do not want to meet bi men.

Get over it and move on.. One is direct and one is almost apologetic. I don't mind either approach although I would probably prefer the company of the former..

Imagine going for a meal with the former..

What do you want to eat? Salad.

The latter,

What do you want to eat? Well for years I toyed with the idea of giving up meat but I worry about the planet and then I .....

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

As I've said countless times before it's *how* something is expressed, not necessarily what is expressed that is the issue.

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

To be honest I would find the inclusion of disgusting unnecessary. Saying it's a big turn off for you is enough of a reason without having to include such a loaded word."

Good point well made - I only included it in my example off the back of the words that had been used previously.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

Thank you. I've just done it. Honestly I'm shocked. It doesn't make it any less illegal just because it's a woman. The mods really do need to clamp down on this.

There was another one as well about flashing your milkman or postman or something. I got into a heated debate on there about the legalities of it. Someone was insisting no offence has been committed if the person exposing themselves is not visibly aroused at the time. I was shocked at the lack of knowledge and understanding of this type of behaviour and the legal and ethical issues around consent. This is an adult sex site - that lack of knowledge is a serious concern imo.

Would that be considered kink shaming?"

No. I don’t consider my disapproval of an illegal activity to be “shaming”. I also disapprove of GBH and robbery. Am I “shaming” those who commit those offences by saying this?

Ensure you have Informed Consent for your sexual activity = number one priority. After that, do what the Christ you like. It’s really that simple.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

Won't somebody think of the children!!!

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

There is a difference although this is not an English lesson, it is a swinging site and the sentences to me are read with that context. Both say the same thing to me.

I do not want to meet bi men.

Get over it and move on..."

No it's not an English lesson, but there is a huge difference - one expresses personal opinion that may be based on background and is acceptable (although as Lacey rightly points out the use of the word "disgusting" is questionable), the other makes a generalisation and is inflammatory and as such is anything but acceptable.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

Thank you. I've just done it. Honestly I'm shocked. It doesn't make it any less illegal just because it's a woman. The mods really do need to clamp down on this.

There was another one as well about flashing your milkman or postman or something. I got into a heated debate on there about the legalities of it. Someone was insisting no offence has been committed if the person exposing themselves is not visibly aroused at the time. I was shocked at the lack of knowledge and understanding of this type of behaviour and the legal and ethical issues around consent. This is an adult sex site - that lack of knowledge is a serious concern imo.

Would that be considered kink shaming?

No. I don’t consider my disapproval of an illegal activity to be “shaming”. I also disapprove of GBH and robbery. Am I “shaming” those who commit those offences by saying this?

Ensure you have Informed Consent for your sexual activity = number one priority. After that, do what the Christ you like. It’s really that simple. "

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Shame shame i dont know your name

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Won't somebody think of the children!!! "

I see your point. Disgusting isn’t is. Who do these people think they are? The people in society who think the general public, including minors and vulnerable adults, should not have others’ sexual fetishes forced upon them. What an awful “boring”, uptight breed such people are. Why not just let everyone do whatever they like, whenever the like? Remove the need for informed consent and let’s all just crack on with enacting our fantasises

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford


"

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

There is a difference although this is not an English lesson, it is a swinging site and the sentences to me are read with that context. Both say the same thing to me.

I do not want to meet bi men.

Get over it and move on...

No it's not an English lesson, but there is a huge difference - one expresses personal opinion that may be based on background and is acceptable (although as Lacey rightly points out the use of the word "disgusting" is questionable), the other makes a generalisation and is inflammatory and as such is anything but acceptable.

"

Well I am sure that some people view some sexual acts as disgusting. I would rather them speak their mind and I will judge them on that rather them pussyfoot around. I think in the written word what is acceptable is subjective..

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"Won't somebody think of the children!!!

I see your point. Disgusting isn’t is. Who do these people think they are? The people in society who think the general public, including minors and vulnerable adults, should not have others’ sexual fetishes forced upon them. What an awful “boring”, uptight breed such people are. Why not just let everyone do whatever they like, whenever the like? Remove the need for informed consent and let’s all just crack on with enacting our fantasises "

I just wish people could disagree with this stand point without having to go on and on and on and on about it, you know? That's when it gets kinda dull. Bless 'em.

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

There is a difference although this is not an English lesson, it is a swinging site and the sentences to me are read with that context. Both say the same thing to me.

I do not want to meet bi men.

Get over it and move on...

No it's not an English lesson, but there is a huge difference - one expresses personal opinion that may be based on background and is acceptable (although as Lacey rightly points out the use of the word "disgusting" is questionable), the other makes a generalisation and is inflammatory and as such is anything but acceptable.

Well I am sure that some people view some sexual acts as disgusting. I would rather them speak their mind and I will judge them on that rather them pussyfoot around. I think in the written word what is acceptable is subjective.."

People are entitled to find some sexual acts disgusting to them for sure - BUT as I keep saying how that is expressed is the key and the point of this thread - expressed respectfully and with acceptance that although it's not for them it might be for others it's perfectly acceptable, expressed in a derogatory or dismissive way it is not, no subjectivity about it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Won't somebody think of the children!!!

I see your point. Disgusting isn’t is. Who do these people think they are? The people in society who think the general public, including minors and vulnerable adults, should not have others’ sexual fetishes forced upon them. What an awful “boring”, uptight breed such people are. Why not just let everyone do whatever they like, whenever the like? Remove the need for informed consent and let’s all just crack on with enacting our fantasises

I just wish people could disagree with this stand point without having to go on and on and on and on about it, you know? That's when it gets kinda dull. Bless 'em.

"

It’s a forum. By definition, it elicits multiple and lengthy discussions. I see threads that go “on and on” about boring shit (in my opinion), I just bypass them if I find them dull.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"Won't somebody think of the children!!!

I see your point. Disgusting isn’t is. Who do these people think they are? The people in society who think the general public, including minors and vulnerable adults, should not have others’ sexual fetishes forced upon them. What an awful “boring”, uptight breed such people are. Why not just let everyone do whatever they like, whenever the like? Remove the need for informed consent and let’s all just crack on with enacting our fantasises

I just wish people could disagree with this stand point without having to go on and on and on and on about it, you know? That's when it gets kinda dull. Bless 'em.

It’s a forum. By definition, it elicits multiple and lengthy discussions. I see threads that go “on and on” about boring shit (in my opinion), I just bypass them if I find them dull. "

You misunderstand me, it's not the thread subject that's dull.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Won't somebody think of the children!!!

I see your point. Disgusting isn’t is. Who do these people think they are? The people in society who think the general public, including minors and vulnerable adults, should not have others’ sexual fetishes forced upon them. What an awful “boring”, uptight breed such people are. Why not just let everyone do whatever they like, whenever the like? Remove the need for informed consent and let’s all just crack on with enacting our fantasises

I just wish people could disagree with this stand point without having to go on and on and on and on about it, you know? That's when it gets kinda dull. Bless 'em.

It’s a forum. By definition, it elicits multiple and lengthy discussions. I see threads that go “on and on” about boring shit (in my opinion), I just bypass them if I find them dull.

You misunderstand me, it's not the thread subject that's dull. "

I don’t misunderstand you at all. I realise you are saying the part that’s dull is people going “on and on” about the topic in a lengthy way? But that happens on public forums, does it not? So my point still stands - read it, think “that’s dull I can’t be arsed”, and move into a less dull thread.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I knew this thread would turn out like this.....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I knew this thread would turn out like this..... "

I just wish people could grasp the concept of informed consent being the most important part of any sexual activity. After that. I genuinely couldn’t give a shit what anyone’s kink is - each to their own, enjoy it

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I knew this thread would turn out like this.....

I just wish people could grasp the concept of informed consent being the most important part of any sexual activity. After that. I genuinely couldn’t give a shit what anyone’s kink is - each to their own, enjoy it "

Is flirting early foreplay though, where does sex start.....? And in turn consent.....?

(I'm being a cunt)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I knew this thread would turn out like this.....

I just wish people could grasp the concept of informed consent being the most important part of any sexual activity. After that. I genuinely couldn’t give a shit what anyone’s kink is - each to their own, enjoy it

Is flirting early foreplay though, where does sex start.....? And in turn consent.....?

(I'm being a cunt) "

No I don’t think flirting is remotely the same level. Unless your idea of flirting is to whip your cock out or grope her vagina? Flirting is social interaction.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

Flirting is actually a form of grooming, or coercing people into sex. The sooner it's stamped out the better!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I think as long as whatever people do is between consenting adults in private then crack on. But don’t expect everyone to be interested in the same things. I might find something disgusting but I’d probably just say that does nothing for me. There’s no benefit in trying to shame people.

Again, I come back to exposing yourself in public ... it isn’t done in private and there is no consent for the unsuspecting person. But it seems to go unchallenged on here a lot .... interesting.

You've mentioned this 3 times now. I cant recall ever seeing flashing being a topic on here. Surely it's illegal and would get taken down? Or are you referring to dogging?

No, I’m talking about flashing. And it has been a topic on here recently - maybe in Swingers Chat section.

Well totally staggered that this is even allowed. Threads like this should just be pulled and the user banned from the forums

Just do a forum search for "Flashing" there are countless threads on it - usually of the "do any ladies like to flash passing truckers" variety rather than tales of men exposing themselves

Thank you. I've just done it. Honestly I'm shocked. It doesn't make it any less illegal just because it's a woman. The mods really do need to clamp down on this.

There was another one as well about flashing your milkman or postman or something. I got into a heated debate on there about the legalities of it. Someone was insisting no offence has been committed if the person exposing themselves is not visibly aroused at the time. I was shocked at the lack of knowledge and understanding of this type of behaviour and the legal and ethical issues around consent. This is an adult sex site - that lack of knowledge is a serious concern imo.

Would that be considered kink shaming?

No. I don’t consider my disapproval of an illegal activity to be “shaming”. I also disapprove of GBH and robbery. Am I “shaming” those who commit those offences by saying this?

Ensure you have Informed Consent for your sexual activity = number one priority. After that, do what the Christ you like. It’s really that simple. "

I don't know if people *do* always check for consent.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

There is a difference although this is not an English lesson, it is a swinging site and the sentences to me are read with that context. Both say the same thing to me.

I do not want to meet bi men.

Get over it and move on...

No it's not an English lesson, but there is a huge difference - one expresses personal opinion that may be based on background and is acceptable (although as Lacey rightly points out the use of the word "disgusting" is questionable), the other makes a generalisation and is inflammatory and as such is anything but acceptable.

Well I am sure that some people view some sexual acts as disgusting. I would rather them speak their mind and I will judge them on that rather them pussyfoot around. I think in the written word what is acceptable is subjective.."

Not everyone has a degree in English language.

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"Won't somebody think of the children!!!

I see your point. Disgusting isn’t is. Who do these people think they are? The people in society who think the general public, including minors and vulnerable adults, should not have others’ sexual fetishes forced upon them. What an awful “boring”, uptight breed such people are. Why not just let everyone do whatever they like, whenever the like? Remove the need for informed consent and let’s all just crack on with enacting our fantasises

I just wish people could disagree with this stand point without having to go on and on and on and on about it, you know? That's when it gets kinda dull. Bless 'em.

It’s a forum. By definition, it elicits multiple and lengthy discussions. I see threads that go “on and on” about boring shit (in my opinion), I just bypass them if I find them dull.

You misunderstand me, it's not the thread subject that's dull. "

What is dull?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Flirting is actually a form of grooming, or coercing people into sex. The sooner it's stamped out the better!"

It actually can be tbf, I'm nice I promise but if I wasnt I could manipuflirt with ppl, and others do this.....

(That IS a word btw)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I knew this thread would turn out like this.....

I just wish people could grasp the concept of informed consent being the most important part of any sexual activity. After that. I genuinely couldn’t give a shit what anyone’s kink is - each to their own, enjoy it

Is flirting early foreplay though, where does sex start.....? And in turn consent.....?

(I'm being a cunt)

No I don’t think flirting is remotely the same level. Unless your idea of flirting is to whip your cock out or grope her vagina? Flirting is social interaction. "

I just wondered if there was like a set physical minimum genital seperation distance when it becomes a sex act. Like I can be on a bus and the kids behind me are calling each other wankers, or the boys might be talking about Amy from year 10's tits and chuckling, but are they having und3rage sex by saying this or just a childish laugh....?

(I'm still being a provocative cunt, so I'll stop now)

I think my point is that EVERYONE has a point and they all mean something to someone and should be respected. Very little respect shown so far in this post, hence all my eye rolling....

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I knew this thread would turn out like this.....

I just wish people could grasp the concept of informed consent being the most important part of any sexual activity. After that. I genuinely couldn’t give a shit what anyone’s kink is - each to their own, enjoy it

Is flirting early foreplay though, where does sex start.....? And in turn consent.....?

(I'm being a cunt)

No I don’t think flirting is remotely the same level. Unless your idea of flirting is to whip your cock out or grope her vagina? Flirting is social interaction.

I just wondered if there was like a set physical minimum genital seperation distance when it becomes a sex act. Like I can be on a bus and the kids behind me are calling each other wankers, or the boys might be talking about Amy from year 10's tits and chuckling, but are they having und3rage sex by saying this or just a childish laugh....?

(I'm still being a provocative cunt, so I'll stop now)

I think my point is that EVERYONE has a point and they all mean something to someone and should be respected. Very little respect shown so far in this post, hence all my eye rolling.... "

Christ Nippy, I love you and know that but you’re pushing it now. Look, I don’t make the country’s laws. Indecent exposure is recognised as a criminal offence, is it not? I didn’t decide that. Someone else did, for good reason I’m sure. Don’t show your bits to people in public, it’s simple.

The boys on the bus in your example are being disrespectful little shits, sure. But of course they’re not having und3rage sex by making a statement. But, if they *grabbed* Amy’s tits, then they’d be in a world of trouble wouldn’t they. And depending on age, might find themselves with a charge of sexual assault.

My point is - there is no law about social interaction of a flirty nature. Unless you’re revealing your bits or grabbing others’ bits.... you’re probably alright. If, however, someone asks you to stop chatting them up, and you follow them persistently and continue, you might find yourself with a harassment charge. It’s little more than common sense, in my view.

Yes, the issue of consent can be blurred in some situations, I agree with you. Two examples come to mind - 1) sleeping with person with a learning disability who is deemed not to have capacity to give informed consent but who has said they want to (*very* tricky grey area indeed - I work with cases like this daily); 2) a couple in a relationship where one claims to have asked the other to stop, and the other denies this saying it was consensual - Very hard to determine what went on there; hence the difficultly achieving a prosecution in so many cases of intimate partner sexual violence.

So - my point is this. Yes, consent can be a dodgy grey area in *some* cases (the above being a couple of examples that spring to mind). But, flashing your genitals intentionally at others in public for me, that’s pretty clean cut with no grey area. It’s illegal - don’t do it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

So, basically the world is grey but once it gets really grey we call it black. And the laws are clear on greyness to the point that we need a human judge to take a decision on how grey our shit is and whether its white or black.....?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So, basically the world is grey but once it gets really grey we call it black. And the laws are clear on greyness to the point that we need a human judge to take a decision on how grey our shit is and whether its white or black.....? "

Right. I’m out. (I can’t even wrap my head around the sentence).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So, basically the world is grey but once it gets really grey we call it black. And the laws are clear on greyness to the point that we need a human judge to take a decision on how grey our shit is and whether its white or black.....? "

If I’m understanding what your saying, yes - the criminal justice system has grey areas. Of course it does, it’s not perfect. Again, I didn’t design it and I’m not responsible for it (although I do work within it, so I am a little clued up on some stuff ).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

*you’re saying, even. I’m so passionate about this topic I’m now making grammatical errors. Time to step away...............

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By *ssex_tomMan
over a year ago

Chelmsford

The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

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By *emini ManMan
over a year ago

There and to the left a bit


"

To give an example there is a huge difference between the following two statements:

"I don't want to meet bi men because personally I find the act of two men having sex disgusting and a turn off"

And

"I don't want to meet bi men because two men having sex is disgusting and a turn off"

There is a difference although this is not an English lesson, it is a swinging site and the sentences to me are read with that context. Both say the same thing to me.

I do not want to meet bi men.

Get over it and move on...

No it's not an English lesson, but there is a huge difference - one expresses personal opinion that may be based on background and is acceptable (although as Lacey rightly points out the use of the word "disgusting" is questionable), the other makes a generalisation and is inflammatory and as such is anything but acceptable.

Well I am sure that some people view some sexual acts as disgusting. I would rather them speak their mind and I will judge them on that rather them pussyfoot around. I think in the written word what is acceptable is subjective..

Not everyone has a degree in English language. "

And one isn't needed, I certainly don't have one, decency, courtesy and respect for others preferences however would go a long way and don't require any kind of degree to be expressed in a non-derogatory way.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"So, basically the world is grey but once it gets really grey we call it black. And the laws are clear on greyness to the point that we need a human judge to take a decision on how grey our shit is and whether its white or black.....?

Right. I’m out. (I can’t even wrap my head around the sentence). "

Sorry my lovely

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

"

Well, boxing is a sport so that’s different. And yes, I agree consent is a concept with grey areas, as I’ve already said.

I don’t know a great deal about BDSM but take for example the bondage aspect of it, and let’s compare that with flashing.

In my view you’d struggle to present a legally defensible argument to the scenario of pulling down your pants in Tesco or a public park, I think. I don’t think you could (at least in legal terms) present a reasoned enough argument that all parties who did or could have seen your genitals were consenting on any level. However, maybe you could present such an argument to the scenario of injury caused by BDSM - “she wanted me to spank her, it was an agreement we made, we were engaged in consensual sex beforehand, etc.....”... therefore much greyer area.

If I’m understanding your point.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

Well, boxing is a sport so that’s different. And yes, I agree consent is a concept with grey areas, as I’ve already said.

I don’t know a great deal about BDSM but take for example the bondage aspect of it, and let’s compare that with flashing.

In my view you’d struggle to present a legally defensible argument to the scenario of pulling down your pants in Tesco or a public park, I think. I don’t think you could (at least in legal terms) present a reasoned enough argument that all parties who did or could have seen your genitals were consenting on any level. However, maybe you could present such an argument to the scenario of injury caused by BDSM - “she wanted me to spank her, it was an agreement we made, we were engaged in consensual sex beforehand, etc.....”... therefore much greyer area.

If I’m understanding your point. "

According to our laws you cannot consent to physical harm. Even if you can prove consent was obtained it is still illegal. There's a few campaigns to try to change it.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

Well, boxing is a sport so that’s different. And yes, I agree consent is a concept with grey areas, as I’ve already said.

I don’t know a great deal about BDSM but take for example the bondage aspect of it, and let’s compare that with flashing.

In my view you’d struggle to present a legally defensible argument to the scenario of pulling down your pants in Tesco or a public park, I think. I don’t think you could (at least in legal terms) present a reasoned enough argument that all parties who did or could have seen your genitals were consenting on any level. However, maybe you could present such an argument to the scenario of injury caused by BDSM - “she wanted me to spank her, it was an agreement we made, we were engaged in consensual sex beforehand, etc.....”... therefore much greyer area.

If I’m understanding your point.

According to our laws you cannot consent to physical harm. Even if you can prove consent was obtained it is still illegal. There's a few campaigns to try to change it."

Ahh. Interesting... so when I consent to my partner spanking my arse during sex, he’s still breaking the law if he leaves a mark?

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

Well, boxing is a sport so that’s different. And yes, I agree consent is a concept with grey areas, as I’ve already said.

I don’t know a great deal about BDSM but take for example the bondage aspect of it, and let’s compare that with flashing.

In my view you’d struggle to present a legally defensible argument to the scenario of pulling down your pants in Tesco or a public park, I think. I don’t think you could (at least in legal terms) present a reasoned enough argument that all parties who did or could have seen your genitals were consenting on any level. However, maybe you could present such an argument to the scenario of injury caused by BDSM - “she wanted me to spank her, it was an agreement we made, we were engaged in consensual sex beforehand, etc.....”... therefore much greyer area.

If I’m understanding your point.

According to our laws you cannot consent to physical harm. Even if you can prove consent was obtained it is still illegal. There's a few campaigns to try to change it.

Ahh. Interesting... so when I consent to my partner spanking my arse during sex, he’s still breaking the law if he leaves a mark? "

Unfortunately so.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?"

At the risk of going “on and on” and “boring” you with my “dullness”. It’s about revealing your genitals to unsuspecting people who have been given no opportunity to consent. Delivery people don’t “catch you” in a state of undress: you make a conscious decision to open the door and force that upon them.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

Well, boxing is a sport so that’s different. And yes, I agree consent is a concept with grey areas, as I’ve already said.

I don’t know a great deal about BDSM but take for example the bondage aspect of it, and let’s compare that with flashing.

In my view you’d struggle to present a legally defensible argument to the scenario of pulling down your pants in Tesco or a public park, I think. I don’t think you could (at least in legal terms) present a reasoned enough argument that all parties who did or could have seen your genitals were consenting on any level. However, maybe you could present such an argument to the scenario of injury caused by BDSM - “she wanted me to spank her, it was an agreement we made, we were engaged in consensual sex beforehand, etc.....”... therefore much greyer area.

If I’m understanding your point.

According to our laws you cannot consent to physical harm. Even if you can prove consent was obtained it is still illegal. There's a few campaigns to try to change it.

Ahh. Interesting... so when I consent to my partner spanking my arse during sex, he’s still breaking the law if he leaves a mark?

Unfortunately so."

Wowzers. There’s one I didn’t know...

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

Well, boxing is a sport so that’s different. And yes, I agree consent is a concept with grey areas, as I’ve already said.

I don’t know a great deal about BDSM but take for example the bondage aspect of it, and let’s compare that with flashing.

In my view you’d struggle to present a legally defensible argument to the scenario of pulling down your pants in Tesco or a public park, I think. I don’t think you could (at least in legal terms) present a reasoned enough argument that all parties who did or could have seen your genitals were consenting on any level. However, maybe you could present such an argument to the scenario of injury caused by BDSM - “she wanted me to spank her, it was an agreement we made, we were engaged in consensual sex beforehand, etc.....”... therefore much greyer area.

If I’m understanding your point.

According to our laws you cannot consent to physical harm. Even if you can prove consent was obtained it is still illegal. There's a few campaigns to try to change it.

Ahh. Interesting... so when I consent to my partner spanking my arse during sex, he’s still breaking the law if he leaves a mark?

Unfortunately so.

Wowzers. There’s one I didn’t know... "

One of the campaigns is called the spanner trust. Their website has a lot of really helpful information about BDSM and the law too.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"The law says that you can consent to being punched in the boxing ring but you cannot consent to being injured in a BDSM scenario. Not sure informed consent is a catchall

Well, boxing is a sport so that’s different. And yes, I agree consent is a concept with grey areas, as I’ve already said.

I don’t know a great deal about BDSM but take for example the bondage aspect of it, and let’s compare that with flashing.

In my view you’d struggle to present a legally defensible argument to the scenario of pulling down your pants in Tesco or a public park, I think. I don’t think you could (at least in legal terms) present a reasoned enough argument that all parties who did or could have seen your genitals were consenting on any level. However, maybe you could present such an argument to the scenario of injury caused by BDSM - “she wanted me to spank her, it was an agreement we made, we were engaged in consensual sex beforehand, etc.....”... therefore much greyer area.

If I’m understanding your point.

According to our laws you cannot consent to physical harm. Even if you can prove consent was obtained it is still illegal. There's a few campaigns to try to change it.

Ahh. Interesting... so when I consent to my partner spanking my arse during sex, he’s still breaking the law if he leaves a mark?

Unfortunately so.

Wowzers. There’s one I didn’t know...

One of the campaigns is called the spanner trust. Their website has a lot of really helpful information about BDSM and the law too."

It sort of makes sense in some situations I suppose - you can see how it could be abused and misused if a vulnerable person consents to being hit (in a non sexual scenario I mean). But it definitely creates difficulties for the sexual side of things. Very interesting.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

At the risk of going “on and on” and “boring” you with my “dullness”. It’s about revealing your genitals to unsuspecting people who have been given no opportunity to consent. Delivery people don’t “catch you” in a state of undress: you make a conscious decision to open the door and force that upon them. "

What about housewives flashing a bit of nipple to the plumber?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

At the risk of going “on and on” and “boring” you with my “dullness”. It’s about revealing your genitals to unsuspecting people who have been given no opportunity to consent. Delivery people don’t “catch you” in a state of undress: you make a conscious decision to open the door and force that upon them.

What about housewives flashing a bit of nipple to the plumber?"

Why would you do that? Some bloke trying to do a day's work, just leave him alone. Make him a cup of tea. If you're horny go and have a wank ffs. It's not fair to push this on people, it's entitled and wrong. The world isn't compelled to help you fulfill fantasies.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury

Fab is officially broken. RIP.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Fab is officially broken. RIP."

That's why half if us frequent here

School uniform...now that is creepy. Dont even try to defend it!

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Fab is officially broken. RIP.

That's why half if us frequent here

School uniform...now that is creepy. Dont even try to defend it! "

My pictures do the defending for me

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Fab is officially broken. RIP.

That's why half if us frequent here

School uniform...now that is creepy. Dont even try to defend it! "

Happy adult people dressing in school uniforms is completely harmless. I've hosted a lot of spanking parties and never found anyone who was into this creepy. But I did encounter men, usually older who would boast about owning tawses that had been used in actual schools. That's creepy. And I'd tell them so. The places I frequented on and offline allowed no discussion of anyone under eighteen, let alone admittance. That's creepy. Dressing in a school uniform is not.

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By *iss behaving2019Woman
over a year ago

East Yorkshire

" Kinky" is what other people do!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?"

Whatever people may call a kink.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

At the risk of going “on and on” and “boring” you with my “dullness”. It’s about revealing your genitals to unsuspecting people who have been given no opportunity to consent. Delivery people don’t “catch you” in a state of undress: you make a conscious decision to open the door and force that upon them.

What about housewives flashing a bit of nipple to the plumber?

Why would you do that? Some bloke trying to do a day's work, just leave him alone. Make him a cup of tea. If you're horny go and have a wank ffs. It's not fair to push this on people, it's entitled and wrong. The world isn't compelled to help you fulfill fantasies. "

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

Whatever people may call a kink."

Not the thread, the melt down about flashing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 15/11/19 14:58:20]

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

At the risk of going “on and on” and “boring” you with my “dullness”. It’s about revealing your genitals to unsuspecting people who have been given no opportunity to consent. Delivery people don’t “catch you” in a state of undress: you make a conscious decision to open the door and force that upon them.

What about housewives flashing a bit of nipple to the plumber?

Why would you do that? Some bloke trying to do a day's work, just leave him alone. Make him a cup of tea. If you're horny go and have a wank ffs. It's not fair to push this on people, it's entitled and wrong. The world isn't compelled to help you fulfill fantasies. "

Entitled is the right word and I think sums up why I dislike it so intensely. It’s completely arrogant in my view to *assume* someone else wants to see your bits. No, we don’t. If we do, you’ll know about, thanks

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

At the risk of going “on and on” and “boring” you with my “dullness”. It’s about revealing your genitals to unsuspecting people who have been given no opportunity to consent. Delivery people don’t “catch you” in a state of undress: you make a conscious decision to open the door and force that upon them.

What about housewives flashing a bit of nipple to the plumber?

Why would you do that? Some bloke trying to do a day's work, just leave him alone. Make him a cup of tea. If you're horny go and have a wank ffs. It's not fair to push this on people, it's entitled and wrong. The world isn't compelled to help you fulfill fantasies.

Entitled is the right word and I think sums up why I dislike it so intensely. It’s completely arrogant in my view to *assume* someone else wants to see your bits. No, we don’t. If we do, you’ll know about, thanks "

Oh, you should have said.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales


"Fab is officially broken. RIP.

That's why half if us frequent here

School uniform...now that is creepy. Dont even try to defend it!

Happy adult people dressing in school uniforms is completely harmless. I've hosted a lot of spanking parties and never found anyone who was into this creepy. But I did encounter men, usually older who would boast about owning tawses that had been used in actual schools. That's creepy. And I'd tell them so. The places I frequented on and offline allowed no discussion of anyone under eighteen, let alone admittance. That's creepy. Dressing in a school uniform is not. "

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

Whatever people may call a kink.

Not the thread, the melt down about flashing. "

How would you feel if a man flashed at a female family member? Possibly a young, shy woman, in a remote location/ not somewhere she could easily call for help.

If she was upset would you tell her not to have a melt down?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

Whatever people may call a kink.

Not the thread, the melt down about flashing.

How would you feel if a man flashed at a female family member? Possibly a young, shy woman, in a remote location/ not somewhere she could easily call for help.

If she was upset would you tell her not to have a melt down?"

Yes, he probably would. And he’d also probably tell her she was “boring” for going “on and on about it”.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

Whatever people may call a kink.

Not the thread, the melt down about flashing.

How would you feel if a man flashed at a female family member? Possibly a young, shy woman, in a remote location/ not somewhere she could easily call for help.

If she was upset would you tell her not to have a melt down?"

Mmmm, what would she be wearing? I want to capture the image in my mind. Is he well hung? A handsome man or fat? Im hoping a filthy, learing fat guy. He looks her in the eye as he shoots his foul smelling juices. Maybe some touches her dress.. she feels it soak through the thin material until it touches her pale skin.. looking at his dripping, shrivelled cock she bites her bottom lip...

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

Whatever people may call a kink.

Not the thread, the melt down about flashing.

How would you feel if a man flashed at a female family member? Possibly a young, shy woman, in a remote location/ not somewhere she could easily call for help.

If she was upset would you tell her not to have a melt down?

Yes, he probably would. And he’d also probably tell her she was “boring” for going “on and on about it”. "

Oh god no! None of my relatives are like that!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP   
over a year ago


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

Whatever people may call a kink.

Not the thread, the melt down about flashing.

How would you feel if a man flashed at a female family member? Possibly a young, shy woman, in a remote location/ not somewhere she could easily call for help.

If she was upset would you tell her not to have a melt down?

Mmmm, what would she be wearing? I want to capture the image in my mind. Is he well hung? A handsome man or fat? Im hoping a filthy, learing fat guy. He looks her in the eye as he shoots his foul smelling juices. Maybe some touches her dress.. she feels it soak through the thin material until it touches her pale skin.. looking at his dripping, shrivelled cock she bites her bottom lip... "

I wish I could say I'm surprised by your response. But I'm not.

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By *lem-H-FandangoMan
over a year ago

salisbury


"I thought this was about being caught by delivery people etc in a state of undress in your own home? Not flashing grans in the high street?

Whatever people may call a kink.

Not the thread, the melt down about flashing.

How would you feel if a man flashed at a female family member? Possibly a young, shy woman, in a remote location/ not somewhere she could easily call for help.

If she was upset would you tell her not to have a melt down?

Mmmm, what would she be wearing? I want to capture the image in my mind. Is he well hung? A handsome man or fat? Im hoping a filthy, learing fat guy. He looks her in the eye as he shoots his foul smelling juices. Maybe some touches her dress.. she feels it soak through the thin material until it touches her pale skin.. looking at his dripping, shrivelled cock she bites her bottom lip...

I wish I could say I'm surprised by your response. But I'm not. "

Likewise

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By *ugby 123Couple
Forum Mod
over a year ago

O o O oo

Ok I think has gone too far now.

Lets leave it there

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