FabSwingers.com forum: can you or maybe could you is a better question

By *good-being-bad OP Man
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

I posted a thread 'technical help' a few weeks ago about setting up a camera as cash was going missing from my mums house, I checked the cash (serial numbers taken) and two £20's were missing today.

So this afternoon I watched the video of a 'trusted' neighbour take the money.

I'm gutted I'm angry someone who looks me in the face as a friend could do such a thing, I was hoping it was the window cleaner or a n other nobody taking the cash.

My mum is due out from hospital on wednesday I have a feeling this will destroy her.

Words really don't convey the disgust I have for someone I've known nearly 40 years that would rob from a ninety year old lady.

Fuc*ing cunt.

2good is in the mood to be bad, really I want to take the thieving bitch and be really fucking bad with her.

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By *good-being-bad OP Man
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

Apologies.I'm so annoyed I forgot the question.

Can you or could you forgive that person.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Bad with her how?

Confront her ask her.

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

Have you confronted the person about it?

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

A trusted neighbour ask her.

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By *crumdiddlyumptiousMan
over a year ago

Don't tell your mum, Just tell her a "white lie" and warn your neighbour you will go to the police if they make any contact with your mum, Bit of a hard one if it will upset your mum so much

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

I can fully understand your anger, but if you let rip on this person you will probably end up the bad guy.

I would confront them calmly, maybe tell them you've installed cameras and see what their reaction is.

Not an excuse on any level, but they may have issues you're not aware of. At least by confronting them you'll get a chance to hear them.

If you're not happy with that you could go to the police, but then youd have to explain to your mum.

It's a horrible thing to happen.

Also get the locks changed pronto.

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By *ady LickWoman
over a year ago

Northampton Somewhere

Why is the neighbour going in your mum's house for if she's not even there?

Ps I don't think I could forgive that.

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By *asmeenTV/TS
over a year ago

STOKE ON TRENT

Don't tell your mum you deal with it.

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By *apascouseMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I would just get the police involved immediately, they are taking advantage of someone who, by your words, is vulnerable. If you don’t they could do it to more people, or make it look more acceptable

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Confront her with it.

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By *iss SJWoman
over a year ago

Hull

"I would just get the police involved immediately, they are taking advantage of someone who, by your words, is vulnerable. If you don’t they could do it to more people, or make it look more acceptable "

I agree, I wouldn’t give them a chance to make up excuses by warning them first either. ’m sure the police wouldn’t need to involve mum if she wasn’t even there.

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By *apascouseMan
over a year ago

Liverpool

I agree, I wouldn’t give them a chance to make up excuses by warning them first either. ’m sure the police wouldn’t need to involve mum if she wasn’t even there. "

Agreed, you can’t let someone get away with this, theft is such a scummy crime

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By *uxom redCouple
over a year ago

Shrewsbury

Don't tell your mum but confront the neighbour.

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By *good-being-bad OP Man
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"Don't tell your mum but confront the neighbour."

If I go see the neighbour I'll rip her several new holes.

This is at least the fifth occasion I'ms aware money had 'vanished'.. this time I know who. I did suspect her last time money went missing my brolther said something to someone and word got around to the neighbour, she was at great pains to tell me she didn't know where the house key was with no prompting.

Fucking cunt. Two good is two angry tonight.

Back in a bit folks off for a drink.

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By *arnayguyMan
over a year ago

Durham Tees

Like others have said, speak to the Police. I would do it before you do anything else. Then you can decide what you are going to do. I would also change the lock.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

That's so hard for you.

The cash is one thing but the loss of trust another.

Why did she do that? And is there any chance she was planning to put it back when she could?

Your mum will be vulnerable if this person takes against her. You've got the evidence but it might be worth having a discussion with her (not tonight) and being calm and saying I know you did this, I don't understand why, it's not like you at all, what's going on? Are you in trouble?

If they are arsey - police. Cow!

But if you can salvage it so you get money back and not ruin your mum's relationship with her I'd go for that. I appreciate it would involve much teeth gritting though.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Personally, I wouldn't go to the Police initially if this person is a "friend" of your mother's. Confront her calmly, show her the evidence and ask for the money back. If she pays it back, tell her she's no longer welcome at your mother's house and have nothing more to do with her. If she doesn't pay it back, go to the police. My reason for the above is that if your mother is unwell, you don't want to make her worse or worry her with police interviews or even possibly a court appearance.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South Wales

I’d go straight to the Police.

They’re stealing from a vulnerable adult.

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By *abs..Woman
over a year ago

What an awful thing for a person to do. Your poor Mum.

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By *good-being-bad OP Man
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"That's so hard for you.

The cash is one thing but the loss of trust another.

Why did she do that? And is there any chance she was planning to put it back when she could?

If they are arsey - police. Cow!

But if you can salvage it so you get money back and not ruin your mum's relationship with her I'd go for that. I appreciate it would involve much teeth gritting though.

I have really no idea how much she might have taken over the time. I know today it was two twenties, two or three weeks ago it was at least a twenty note and some 2 pound coins, they were the things that drew my attention not the note(s), as I say I'm aware of at least 5 occasions and no money has ever reappeared.

I've rung the police, no matter how quiet I try and keep this, mum will get to know , she asked my brother just today when he visited her ifs any more had gone missing,

Just gotta get the police to do their jobs now, the call handler has sent it to despatch.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Apologies.I'm so annoyed I forgot the question.

Can you or could you forgive that person."

No.

Glad you found out who it was. If it was me I'd probably not tell my mum. I'd tell the neighbour I had a camera and the police were involved, and see what they said.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would also keep the camera working, in case there's more than one person stealing.

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By *dam1971Man
over a year ago

Bedford

"Back in a bit folks off for a drink.

Definitely don’t do anything after a drink.

Your mother may value this woman’s companionship (friendship isn’t the right word) so pushing her away might upset your mother more than you intend.

Give it a day, calmly confront her and see what she says. Make it absolutely clear you won’t tolerate this and will be watching, but not in a manner that scares her.

Not just for your mother’s sake, but this neighbour might tell someone else and it could spiral badly out of control, your mother being the one to lose out.

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By *alldarksurreyMan
over a year ago

surrey

Just don't do anything stupid that you will regret later on op, i'm sure your mum won't want to visit you in prison or hospital because of some petty thieving bitch

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By *allySlinkyWoman
over a year ago

Leeds

Why did she continue to leave money accessible if she knew it had been stolen five times already ?

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By *ara JTV/TS
over a year ago

Bristol East

Just gotta get the police to do their jobs now, the call handler has sent it to despatch.

I hope it works out for the best, and you and your mum can put this behind you.

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By *innie The MinxWoman
over a year ago

Under the Duvet

"I can fully understand your anger, but if you let rip on this person you will probably end up the bad guy.

I would confront them calmly, maybe tell them you've installed cameras and see what their reaction is.

Not an excuse on any level, but they may have issues you're not aware of. At least by confronting them you'll get a chance to hear them.

If you're not happy with that you could go to the police, but then youd have to explain to your mum.

It's a horrible thing to happen.

Also get the locks changed pronto.

One more thing I would say, are you sure your mum hasn't said that this person can "borrow" money? If shes vulnerable and/or lonely she might have been manipulated into a position where the neighbour thinks it's "ok" to help herself.

I knew someone whose elderly parent had dementia and was letting all and sundry into the house as they were lonely and didn't understand the risks, and then denied it after the event.

Tread carefully.

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By *good-being-bad OP Man
over a year ago

mis-types and auto corrects leads cock leeds

"Why did she continue to leave money accessible if she knew it had been stolen five times already ?"

Mum is disabled so she has some cash to pay for things, window cleaner, gardener, folk that get her bits of shopping, she doesn't want folk to spend their money getting her stuff.

The thievingf cuntty bitch only comes when mum is in hospital and isin't there,

I'd moved the money to a back bedroom door pulled too, so the twatty cunty bastard has had to go looking.

Yep my language is likely to get worse the more I'm sat waiting for plod.

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By *ackinabox19Man
over a year ago

Harrogate

I definitely would never be able to forgive or trust them and would have to confront them about it !!

As hard as it will be staying calm I definitely agree it’s the correct approach and the reasons given would dictate my response, can’t think of any excuse to justify any form of stealing but could be some that helps you understand and make sense if this betrayal of trust !!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I would try not to tell your Mum while also ensuring the relationship with the con artist is ended. Easier said than done perhaps but it might be too upsetting for her to be told the full situation?

I would definitely have it out with the fake friend though and be clear you have evidence/they only get one chance to back off.

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