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Favourite comedians

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By *aitonel OP   Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

As much as I do enjoy a few modern comedians, of all styles, a lot of them seem to generally be much of the same.

Do you have a favourite comedian (past or present) and what is one of your favourt jokes/bits that they tell?

Mine will always be the late great George Carlin. With his words of wisdom. I would post one of my favourites he tells but its a bit of a wall of text.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jimeoin, he's my favorite at the moment

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

George Carlin's routine on God is superb.

Always loved Billy Connolly.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I also like Sean locke and Chappelle when he's not being a racist cunt

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By *ilth500Man
over a year ago

Merseyside

Kevin Bridges

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By *latinumkittenWoman
over a year ago

from Home Counties to Middle Earth


"Jimeoin, he's my favorite at the moment "

So many good comics.

Lee Mack can always get me going

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By *aitonel OP   Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

From the wonderful mind of George Carlin

"Here's another idea. I'm going to save you a whole lot of money on prisons, but at the same time we are still going to remove from society many of our more annoying citizens. Four groups are going away permanently.

First group: Violent criminals. Here's what you do with these Emmy award winners. You take the entire state of Kansas. You move everybody out. You give them a couple of hundred dollars for their inconvenience, you know. Got to be fair. And then, you move them out, you put a big ten story electric fence around Kansas and Kansas becomes a permanent prison farm for violent criminals. No parole, no police, no supplies, the only thing you give them is lethal weapons and live ammunition, so they can communicate in a meaningful way. Then you put the whole thing on Cable TV. The Violence Network, VNN. And for a corporate sponsor, you get one of those companies that loves to smear it's logo feces all over the landscape. Budweiser will jump at this shit in half a minute.

Alright, next group: sex criminals. Completely incurable, you got to lock them up. You could outlaw religion and in most cities sex crimes would disappear in a couple of generations. But we don't have time for rational solutions! Much easier to fence off another rectangular state. Rectangular states are cheaper to fence; saves the taxpayers money, you know? This time Wyoming. But only for true sex offenders. We're not going to bother consenting adults who like to dress up in leather Boy Scout uniforms and smash each other in the head with ball peen hammers while they take turns blowing their cat. There's certainly nothing wrong with that. It's a victimless hobby. And think of how good the cat must feel! No, we're only going to lock up rap**ts and mol**ters. Those hopeless romantics. Who're so full of love they can't help getting a little of it on you. Usually on your leg. You take all of these heavy breathing fun seekers, and you stick them in Wyoming. And you let them suck, fuck and fondle, you let them blow, chew, sniff lick whip gobble and cornhole each other...until their testicles are whistling 'Oh Come All Ye Faithful'! And..and you turn on the cameras and you've got The Sperm Channel! And don't forget our corporate sponsor. We're going to let Budweiser put little logo patches on the rapist's pants right here, 'This Pud's For You'!

Alright, next group: Drug addicts and alcoholics. Not all of them, don't get nervous. Just the ones who are making life difficult for at least one other person. And we're not going to bother first offenders. People deserve a chance to clean up. Everyone will get...twelve chances to clean up. Alright, fifteen! Fifteen! That's fine, and that's it, if you can't make it in fifteen tries, off you go *fwit* to Colorado! Colorado! The perfect- a perfect place for staying loaded. Each week, all of the illegal drugs confiscated in the United States...that the police and D.E.A. don't keep for their own personal use...will be air-dropped into Colorado. And we're going to turn the Coors brewery over to the beer drinking assholes and everyone can stay wasted, wired, stoned, bombed, hammered, smashed and shitfaced 'round the clock on another new cable channel, Shitface Central- 'This is the real Rocky Mountain HIGH!!!

Ok, I've saved my favorite group for last. The maniacs and crazy people. Yeah. The ones who live out where the buses don't run. And I distinguish between maniacs and crazy people. A maniac will beat nine people to death with a steel dildo. A crazy person will beat nine people to death with a steel dildo, but he'll be wearing a Bugs Bunny suit at the time. So you can't put them all away. You know you got to keep some of them around just for the entertainment. Like a guy who tells you the King of Sweden is using his penis as a radio transmitter to send anti-semitic lesbian meatloaf recipes to Soupy Sales and Marvin Hamlisch. A guy like that you want to give him his own radio show. No, the maniac farm will be reserved strictly for hopeless cases. Like a guy who gets a big tattoo on his chest of Liza Minnelli taking a shit, you know? And he tells you if he wiggles a certain way it looks like she's wiping her ass, you know? A guy like that, you want to get him into custody as quickly as possible. Now, for the maniac farm, I think there's no question we got to go with Utah. Utah. Easy to fence. Easy to fence. Right next to Wyoming and Colorado and Colorado is right next to Kansas, and that means all four groups of our most amusing citizens are now in one place.

Except for the big fences. And I think I have another one of my really good ideas for Cable TV. Gates. Small sliding gates in the fences. Think of what you've got here. Think of what you've got. Predators, degenerates, crackheads and fruitcakes. Nine hundred miles of fence separating them. Every fifty miles you put a small sliding gate. But- the gates are only ten inches wide and they're only open once a month...for seven seconds. And you know something? fuckk cable, this shit has got to be on Pay-Per-View. Because, if those gates are only open seven seconds a month, you are going to have some mighty interesting people pushing and shoving to be first in line. Deeply disturbed armed cranky lunatics on drugs. You know the ones. Lot of tattoos...lot of teeth broken off at the gumline...the true face of America. And every time you open the gates, a few of the more aggressive ones are going to get through. The creme de la creme. The alphas. They're going to get through, they're going to find each other and they're going to cross-breed. And pretty soon you'll have a melting pot. Child killers, corpse fuckers, drug zombies and full-blown wackaloons. Wandering the landscape in search of truth and fun. Just like now! Everyone will have guns, everyone will have drugs and no one will be in charge. Just like now! But at least we'll have a balanced budget."

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

I like early Eddie Izzard. The San Francisco show was brilliant. More recently Micky Flanagan "out, out" always gets me laughing.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"I like early Eddie Izzard. The San Francisco show was brilliant. More recently Micky Flanagan "out, out" always gets me laughing. "

I love eddie izzard

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Hugh Dennis on Mock the Week

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By *od ThrusterMan
over a year ago

Newport Pagnell


"Hugh Dennis on Mock the Week "

Isn't it funny (curious) how people are different. I'd say he's the second most unfunny comedian I've heard!

Back in the day I used to love Dave Allen (stand up rather than sketches) and Mike Harding too. Maybe it's nostalgia but I often think modern comedian's aren't as good.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Russell Howard

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters

It has to be Billy Colony

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It has to be Billy Colony "

Nah hes an arse, i prefer billy connelly sorry couldnt resist

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By *tevej1111Man
over a year ago

edinburgh

Olde but goodie Bob Monkhouse a comedy genius

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port

Tim Vine, I love his quick daft jokes eg.

"I said to the gym instructor'Can you teach me to do the splits?' He said: 'How flexible are you?' I said: 'I can’t make Tuesdays.'"

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By *orbidden eastMan
over a year ago

london dodging electric scooters


"It has to be Billy Colony

Nah hes an arse, i prefer billy connelly sorry couldnt resist"

Nice one bud by the time I realised it was out of my hands

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Lee Evans or Jeff Dunham

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Billy Connolly has always been my favourite. However I like Micky Flanagan and John Bishop quite a lot too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bill Hicks

first live act i saw was in 1988. Billy Connolly, he's still one of the best on my opinion

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rik Mayall and Ade Edmondson

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury

Rik and Ade, Gregg Davis, Eddie Izzard etc.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Kevin Bridges "

Yes!

Dara O’Briain,

John Bishop,

Deirdre O’Kane.

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By *rwhowhatwherewhyMan
over a year ago

Aylesbury


"Rik Mayall and Ade Edmondson"

Good call

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Carlin and Hicks. Shit, I miss them

That third Bill & Ted film won’t be quite the same without Rufus...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bill Hicks

first live act i saw was in 1988. Billy Connolly, he's still one of the best on my opinion"

sorry for this but I was 1 then, not trying to make you feel old I promise x

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"It has to be Billy Colony

Nah hes an arse, i prefer billy connelly sorry couldnt resist

Nice one bud by the time I realised it was out of my hands"

Usually the case

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Steve martin! Genius...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Rik Mayall and Ade Edmondson

Good call "

I had the pleasure to meet them at one of their last live shows in Birmingham. Also to get a photo and a signed dvd

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By *carlet_woman_xxWoman
over a year ago

somewhere

Monty python classic

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Frankie Boyle

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bill Hicks

first live act i saw was in 1988. Billy Connolly, he's still one of the best on my opinionsorry for this but I was 1 then, not trying to make you feel old I promise x"

hahaha my 29 yr old reminds me all the time that Im old

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Eddie Izzard, saw him last week in Leeds

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By *hechapMan
over a year ago

Derry

George Carlin did come out with some good ones.

I enjoy Jimmy Carr.

Some comedians are not even funny.

Its actually more laughable and comical that people go and pay money to see these so called comedians.

That is more funny than the actual jokes the comedian tells.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bill Hicks and George Carlin, their comedy was on a different level.

Doug Stanhope and Jim Jefferies are also quite good in my opinion.

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By *tephTV67TV/TS
over a year ago

Cheshire

Doug Stanhope, absolutely on point with his comedy

I know he's fashionable but watch Stewart Lee do 'Braveheart' on YouTube in a Glasgow venue scary and funny

Others on the list

Dave Gorman

Agree with above poster with Dave Allen and I saw him live as well, absolutely brilliant.

Do like Mark Thomas as I enjoy Political activist comedy

So many on the list to be honest

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By *awpleasureMan
over a year ago

Sutton Coldfield

Dylan Moran

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By *ez1987Man
over a year ago

Great Harwood, Blackburn

Not a massive stand up comedian fan but I've not laughed as much since watching Gabriel ingesias

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By *il FiskMan
over a year ago

sefton

Dennis Leary, his stuff is raw, and the one that everyone forgets...

Robin Williams, his stand up was the best I'd ever seen!!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Bill Hicks

Jim Jeffries

Jim Gaffigan

Gary Delaney

Oh and Chevy Chase

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By *orenzoVonMatterhornMan
over a year ago

Lincoln

Richard Prior is absolute gold.

More recently though, I love Bert Kreisher. That man is hilarious, and a pretty wholesome guy too

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Russell Howard"

He’s hot he is!

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Micky Flanagan

Tim Vine

John Bishop

Milton Jones

Lee Evans

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"Bill Hicks

first live act i saw was in 1988. Billy Connolly, he's still one of the best on my opinion"

Bill Hicks for me

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By *rNaughtyNickMan
over a year ago

Birmingham

Comedians of the 80s and 90s before the world got PC !

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By *hyandtwistedCouple
over a year ago

loughborough

Phil Cool

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Rik may all, bottom was brilliant. Live shows great. Man was a crazy legend

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By *arlomaleMan
over a year ago

darlington

Mike reed yes he did a few Bernard manning gags but it was mikes unique style yes probably a bit dated now but recently watch him on YouTube and still laughed

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By *he Mac LassWoman
over a year ago

Hefty Hideaway

Jayde Adams is my absolute favourite at the moment. She really tickles my funny bones ans is super hot too.

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By *isaAndNicoleTransTV/TS
over a year ago

Southport / Ellesmere Port

Saw Billy Connolly at the Liverpool Arena a couple of years back. Obviously a lot slower and showing signs of his parkinsons but one of the funniest shows I have ever seen. Never stopped laughing all the way through and it takes a lot to make me laugh!

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By *xperimentalistMan
over a year ago

East Yorkshire


"Bill Hicks

first live act i saw was in 1988. Billy Connolly, he's still one of the best on my opinion"

Taken too soon from this planet, would be so interesting to see what he would make of the world today

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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago

Stoke area

Ken Dodd

Rowan Atkinson

Phil Cool

Victoria Wood

Julian Clary

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By *edoriartyCouple
over a year ago

Peterborough

Stewart Lee

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By *ervent_fervourMan
over a year ago

Halifax

Hicks(well looks like we got ourselves a reader) , connelly, Allen(Dave), Izzard(would you like some cake/flags), Bailey,John Shuttleworth (I can't go back to savoury now(I've started me sweet)).

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Dave Chappelle

Ricky Gervais

Mickey Flanagan

Different comedians for different needs.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Just finished all of Whitney Cummings and Iliza Shlesinger Netflix specials, enjoyed them a lot.

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By *ily WhiteWoman
over a year ago

?

I know it probably won't be a popular opinion on here, but I find Frankie Boyle hilarious.

Further back in time, Jasper Carrott used to make me laugh, and I never tire of watching anything with John Cleese in.

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By *atebanksMan
over a year ago

North London

Jerry Seinfeld, Chris Rock, Eddie Murphy (from back in the day) and Dave Chappelle.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

An acquired taste but I love Tim Minchin.

Picked the least offensive song I could think of! https://youtu.be/UEyJnwPIr4Q

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By *aitonel OP   Man
over a year ago

Liverpool


"An acquired taste but I love Tim Minchin.

Picked the least offensive song I could think of! https://youtu.be/UEyJnwPIr4Q"

I can't look at Tim Minchin... He looks like the love child of 3 of my friends and it freaks me out...

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An acquired taste but I love Tim Minchin.

Picked the least offensive song I could think of! https://youtu.be/UEyJnwPIr4Q

I can't look at Tim Minchin... He looks like the love child of 3 of my friends and it freaks me out... "

I think he's quite hot! Are they on here...?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An acquired taste but I love Tim Minchin.

Picked the least offensive song I could think of! https://youtu.be/UEyJnwPIr4Q"

I love Tim Minchin! Bought tickets to see him in Edinburgh for my son's birthday :D

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By *nabelle21Woman
over a year ago

B38

F&B

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Billy Connelly and Lee Evans

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By *hunky GentMan
over a year ago

Maldon and Peterborough

Lee Evans.

Peter kay.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago


"An acquired taste but I love Tim Minchin.

Picked the least offensive song I could think of! https://youtu.be/UEyJnwPIr4Q

I love Tim Minchin! Bought tickets to see him in Edinburgh for my son's birthday :D"

Aw I'm jealous! Enjoy!

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By *UGGYBEAR2015Man
over a year ago

BRIDPORT

Richard Pryor is in a class of his own. Big loss to the world the day he passed away.

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By *orksRockerMan
over a year ago

Bradford

Lee Mack

Ricky Gervais

Billy Connolly

Jason Manford

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip

Patton Oswalt (look up his routines about sky cake and about Sandwich Joe!)

Rich Hall is about the funniest man alive.

Sarah Millican

George Carlin

Zoe Lyons

Miles Jupp

Simon Evans

And some oldies...

Bob Monkhouse

Tommy Cooper

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By *tella HeelsTV/TS
over a year ago

west here ford shire

John Bishop really funny to see live..

From ages gone by..

Tommy Cooper ( I watched him literally die on tv that fateful night)

Frankie Howard

Charlie Williams

Charlie Drake

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By *ervent_fervourMan
over a year ago

Halifax

Shit. Forgot Sarah Pascoe.

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity


"Jimeoin, he's my favorite at the moment

So many good comics.

Lee Mack can always get me going"

Lee Mack is awesome stand up .

Irish names especially

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Jim Jefferies

Gary Delaney

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By *rumpyMcFuckNuggetMan
over a year ago

Den of Iniquity

1. Billy Connolly

2. Lee Mack

3. George Carlin

4. Lee Evans

5. Sarah Millican

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By *istressZoeTV/TS
over a year ago

cheshire

If you are Scottish you should check out Janey Godley x

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By *aitonel OP   Man
over a year ago

Liverpool


"Shit. Forgot Sarah Pascoe. "

Yes! One of the few female stand up comedians I genuinely find consistently funny.

She is also extremely intelligent, love her on episodes of No such thing as a fish.

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Kevin bridges, robin williams, lee Evans, Jim Jeffries and Richard Pryor

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By *aitonel OP   Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

I find Jon Richardson funny, but a large part of that is because I often get told I'm a toned down version of him

Used to love listening to Russell Howard and Jon Richardson on their radio show years ago. Complete opposites playing off each other.

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By *aitonel OP   Man
over a year ago

Liverpool

I find it really difficult to view Robin Williams as just a comedian because his talent range was so good. But yes he is one of, if not the best really.

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate

Richard Pryor is my all time favourite.

I also love Rich Hall, Billy Connolly and Dave Chapelle.

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By *lack UhuruMan
over a year ago

Leeds

I can't remember the comedian's be but he was a 80's comedian and he had L & R on his boots and got letters from his ma. Now he was funny.

Present day-ish Bernie Mac. One of the rawest comedians of his time. Rest in peace Bernie Mac

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Reginald D Hunter. I think he's fucking brilliant

P

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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago

Camberley occasionally doncaster

Dara o'briain. Funniest guy I have seen. Hands down. I hurt after his shows from laughing so much.

From the past? Dave Allen. His telling the time skit is hilarious.

The 2 Ronnies were massively underrated. Absolute legends at the spin and use of the English language.

At live shows I can be a nightmare. Once strung along Jimmy Carr by telling him inwas a deep sea welder. Walked out on Reg D Hunter, telling him I was going to buy his warm up guy a drink as he was funny and should have been the headline act. He had no comeback

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By *SAchickWoman
over a year ago

Hillside desolate


"Reginald D Hunter. I think he's fucking brilliant

P"

I saw him live and he was absolutely hilarious

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By *partharmonyCouple
over a year ago

Ruislip


"I can't remember the comedian's be but he was a 80's comedian and he had L & R on his boots and got letters from his ma. Now he was funny."

Jimmy Cricket!

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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago

Camberley occasionally doncaster


"Reginald D Hunter. I think he's fucking brilliant

P

I saw him live and he was absolutely hilarious "

When I saw him he was dreary. Started spaffing quasi-philosophical crap. He had 2 decent jokes in 40 mins before I walked out..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Micky Flannigan at the mo

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By *irthandgirthMan
over a year ago

Camberley occasionally doncaster

My grandparents still think chubby brown, Jim davidson and a few others of that era are hilarious. Makes me cringe.

Some comedy does not stand the test of time..

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Thought the title said forumite comedians for a sec..... ......enough already.....

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By *andKBCouple
over a year ago

Plymouth

This is really difficult this one. Not sure if he's intentionally a comedian but I love Jonathan pie at the moment!!

From the past has to be Ronnie Barker.

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By *ce WingerMan
over a year ago

P.O. Box DE1 0NQ

Bob Newheart

Frank Skinner

Sean Locke

Kevin Bridges

Tom Allen

Victoria Wood

Gary Delaney

Bob Monkhouse

Paul Choudrey

and my other Grandfather, Milton Jones

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By *picknspanMan
over a year ago

North West Leeds

Jim Jefferies

Gary Delaney

Frankie Boyle

Today's top 3

However, back in time...

Tommy Cooper

Bernard Manning

Frank Carson

Norman Collier

But the king of all, Ever

Bob Monkouse

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By *ayjay218Man
over a year ago

Aberdeen

Kevin bridges is very funny. When he slaughtered Danny dyer I was crying

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By *elvet RopeMan
over a year ago

by the big field

NIce to see lots of love for Mr Sarah Millican...aka Gary Delaney- king of the one liner. Seen him several times and ended up with very painful sides each time.

Suprisingly, Alan Davies was brilliant live. Front row was almost full of old ladies (Johnathan Creek was at its peak at the time), one of them was sat knitting! He went straight in with the blowjob gags and got progressivly ruder from there- old dears were rolling round laughing

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Love Sara Millican and Trevor Noah

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