FabSwingers.com forum: Condoms

By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Rather horrible looking things right?

Did you happen to know that the SAS include them in emergency survival kits as they can hold up to two pints of water? Well, you do now.

Anyhoo - suggest some other non-sexual possible usages for these things.

Off you go

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Balloons for the kids?

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

They make a great pair of goggles if you’re sanding something and can’t find your actual goggles haha

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By *iamondCougarWoman
over a year ago

Norfuck! / Lincolnshire

Mittens? (Well hardly gloves

)

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Swimming cap

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

Waterproof banana case

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

"Balloons for the kids?

I was going to say head balloon..

Stretch one over your head down between your nose and upper lip.. for best results do this with a friend.. then compete to inflate the condom balloon.. by inhaling through the mouth and exhaling through your nose.. winner is first to pop their condom.

I suppose it'd be equally inappropriate with kids, but funnier for it.

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"Balloons for the kids?

‘Here you are kids - I’ve made a horse. What? The weird teet like bit on the top? Eh.....it’s a Unicorn and that’s his horn.’

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

If you tie enough of them together you could make a bungee cord. Though not advisable, it could also be used to make a rope to climb out of someone’s window... especially if her husband just came home lol

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

Paper mache hand mould?

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By *r_Jake70Man
over a year ago

London

I used them for a theatre design. I filled them with water then froze them, pealed the condoms off, attached chains and hung the resulting ice ‘tears’ over the stage to gradually melt during the performance.

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

"If you tie enough of them together you could make a bungee cord. Though not advisable, it could also be used to make a rope to climb out of someone’s window... especially if her husband just came home lol"

Beware of inadvertently bungee‘ing back up to the bedroom window - awkward....

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

The first time i asked my parents what they were was when Alan Titchmarsh mentioned them on TV. He was using them in some way to make plant waterers.

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

Veruca socks

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

"Veruca socks"

How long are your toes?!?!

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By *orenzoVonMatterhornMan
over a year ago

Lincoln

DIY shower head, just poke a few holes, whack it over the pipe and you're sorted. For best results leave running for five minutes to wash out the chemicals before use

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Fun condom related TV fact: The Jon Pertwee Dr Who era episode, The Green Death actually used inflated condoms in some scenes to represent the venomous antagonistic maggots.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

I guess you could put on on your head, inflate it and be a cockerel

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

"Veruca socks

How long are your toes?!?!"

my big toes are mahoosive!

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

How about using them as expedient crime scene shoe socks? Be sure to clear it with both your superiors and the forensics teams first though.....

‘Sir....we found traces of lubricant all over the place.’

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"DIY shower head, just poke a few holes, whack it over the pipe and you're sorted. For best results leave running for five minutes to wash out the chemicals before use

Chemicals?

I hope you just mean lube

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

"Veruca socks

How long are your toes?!?!

my big toes are mahoosive! "

Crikey, are you part orangutan?

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By *orenzoVonMatterhornMan
over a year ago

Lincoln

"DIY shower head, just poke a few holes, whack it over the pipe and you're sorted. For best results leave running for five minutes to wash out the chemicals before use

Chemicals?

I hope you just mean lube

And spermicide

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By *a LunaWoman
over a year ago

South

"Veruca socks

How long are your toes?!?!

my big toes are mahoosive!

Crikey, are you part orangutan?"

funnily enough, no.

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By *eeleyWoman
over a year ago

Dudley

"Veruca socks

How long are your toes?!?!

my big toes are mahoosive!

Crikey, are you part orangutan?

funnily enough, no."

Hmm, just got overly long toes?

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"DIY shower head, just poke a few holes, whack it over the pipe and you're sorted. For best results leave running for five minutes to wash out the chemicals before use

Chemicals?

I hope you just mean lube

And spermicide

You can still get those?

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By *ensuallover1000 OP Man
over a year ago

Somewhere In The Ether…

Another possible useful survival application: tie both ends between the prongs on a forked stick; Hey presto! - A field expedient catapult

I think I’ll email Bear Grylls with this one....

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By *thwalescplCouple
over a year ago

brecon

"Rather horrible looking things right?

Did you happen to know that the SAS include them in emergency survival kits as they can hold up to two pints of water? Well, you do now.

Anyhoo - suggest some other non-sexual possible usages for these things.

Off you go

More if you team it up with a hairnet. I know, I know, those long cold winters nights huddled around the fire just whizz by when we start playing "Whats in your survival tin?"

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By *orenzoVonMatterhornMan
over a year ago

Lincoln

"DIY shower head, just poke a few holes, whack it over the pipe and you're sorted. For best results leave running for five minutes to wash out the chemicals before use

Chemicals?

I hope you just mean lube

And spermicide

You can still get those?"

Turns out most don't any more, the more you know, just seems to be Trojan. Maybe I should read the ingredients more often

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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago

A dress

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By *acey_RedWoman
over a year ago

Liverpool

"DIY shower head, just poke a few holes, whack it over the pipe and you're sorted. For best results leave running for five minutes to wash out the chemicals before use

Chemicals?

I hope you just mean lube

And spermicide

You can still get those?

Turns out most don't any more, the more you know, just seems to be Trojan. Maybe I should read the ingredients more often

I work in sexual health so I'm just a nerd

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