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"You've done the right thing, and be proud that she knows you are fine with it. But also remember everything feels like the end of the world at that age. " So very true but it's hard watching your kids hurt over something that really doesn't matter. Thanks for reply | |||
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"It's a difficult one as at that age people don't understand the complexity of sexuality and relationships. The key point is that she obviously did the right thing by dumping someone who would behave like that. Biphobia and intolerance is rife, however less so in your daughters age group and often people her age are coming to terms with their own sexuality so she may find that many peers will rally around her. In terms of what to say; the simple "it's OK to be who you are, I don't care who you love" will go a long way in this situation. It will be tough in these situations for her, and for you, as you can't fight this battle for her, just support her and be there for her. " Thank you | |||
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"To your daughter it's fine to be bi. Basically she's ended her relationship with her bf because she's realised she's bi and has an on off gf. The lads pissed she's ended it and decided to tell her whole collage she's gay. My advice so far has been to be proud of what she is. Is nobody's business but hers but she's only just 17 and in bits over it. Can anyone think of anything else I can do to help her other than obviously support her as an where I can.... plz this is a serious post and although I'm normally the joker in the pack this time I'm deadly serious. So any ideas." You've done the right thing. Peoples sexuality is their choice and their right. She will feel like crap for a while but just be there for her. Make sure she knows shes loved and judgemental people have no place in her life xxxx | |||
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"You've done the right thing, and be proud that she knows you are fine with it. But also remember everything feels like the end of the world at that age. So very true but it's hard watching your kids hurt over something that really doesn't matter. Thanks for reply " It's definitely hard to see them hurting over something that trivial in a way. You love who you love end of imo. But agree with another poster being bi is more spoken about in this age group compared to my own. Keep up the awesome parenting | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. " Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games. | |||
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"From as much as I know from my daughter of a similar age to your own, her generation is far more accepting of such things than my generation ever was at school age. I just posed your concerns to her and her reply was the lad blabbing his mouth would be more likely to suffer abuse from others for trying to publicly “out” her, than your daughter. " I thought that too. There will be one or two who will snigger but I bet the majority will think he's an arse. | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games." That's not a very good way of dealing with it | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games. That's not a very good way of dealing with it " Made her smile and that was my point. It does say up there niether of us would touch him. | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games. That's not a very good way of dealing with it " Of course it is. Dads and brothers are there to protect. The odd idle threat goes a long way sometimes, and quite often it does the trick. Nothing wrong with it. | |||
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"My daughter went to a support group for a while until they ditched it which was a shame,maybe there's something in her area to help her until she gets stronger and less likely to give a shit about what some moron says to her. My daughter at 18,19 next month has just asked her girlfriend to marry her!" Now how could I forget you'd done this already. I should of asked you 1st off sorry x | |||
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"I bet most of the people who have heard what he's said thinks he's a childish prick. You're doing what any parent would. What a great dad you are x " I try but never feel I get it quite right but I'm proud she knew to come to me. That pulled a few strings I can tell you. | |||
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"I bet most of the people who have heard what he's said thinks he's a childish prick. You're doing what any parent would. What a great dad you are x I try but never feel I get it quite right but I'm proud she knew to come to me. That pulled a few strings I can tell you." NONE of us feel we're getting it quite right! | |||
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"I bet most of the people who have heard what he's said thinks he's a childish prick. You're doing what any parent would. What a great dad you are x I try but never feel I get it quite right but I'm proud she knew to come to me. That pulled a few strings I can tell you. NONE of us feel we're getting it quite right! " So what do I do. I had no mum or dad I'm winging it the best I can | |||
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"I bet most of the people who have heard what he's said thinks he's a childish prick. You're doing what any parent would. What a great dad you are x I try but never feel I get it quite right but I'm proud she knew to come to me. That pulled a few strings I can tell you. NONE of us feel we're getting it quite right! So what do I do. I had no mum or dad I'm winging it the best I can " Sorry my bad I read that wrong | |||
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"Is she sad that she's realised she's bi, or sad that her ex bf is an arsehole? How would you deal with it if he was spreading other rumours about her (as in not saying that she's bi, saying some other shit)? As others have said, the fact that he's being a dick about it says more about him than her. Depends on where you live re: the bi stuff. Some small towns are still full of homophobes. Deal with that separately. " More the lad I think. Shes not ashamed of it I don't think more wanted to tell who she wanted to know rather than the whole collage | |||
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"You already did everything you needed to Bladey. She just needs time. It can be pretty tough being 17 with one foot in adulthood. This too shall pass and she will appreciate your unconditional support. " This for me too Bladey. Plenty of Dad hugs and love n stuff and just listen to her when she’s upset, as you have been. | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games." I really get that he's hurt your daughter and you are angry. But I wouldn't suggest playing head games. Your daughter has nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of, it is him who should be ashamed by his actions. Others will see that x | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games. I really get that he's hurt your daughter and you are angry. But I wouldn't suggest playing head games. Your daughter has nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of, it is him who should be ashamed by his actions. Others will see that x" I know your right. Gut reaction | |||
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"To your daughter it's fine to be bi. Basically she's ended her relationship with her bf because she's realised she's bi and has an on off gf. The lads pissed she's ended it and decided to tell her whole collage she's gay. My advice so far has been to be proud of what she is. Is nobody's business but hers but she's only just 17 and in bits over it. Can anyone think of anything else I can do to help her other than obviously support her as an where I can.... plz this is a serious post and although I'm normally the joker in the pack this time I'm deadly serious. So any ideas." You've given good advice. You've told her you care. You've told her you're there for her. Perfect!!!!! A wise man once wrote; Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games. I really get that he's hurt your daughter and you are angry. But I wouldn't suggest playing head games. Your daughter has nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed of, it is him who should be ashamed by his actions. Others will see that x I know your right. Gut reaction " I know it is xx | |||
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"To your daughter it's fine to be bi. Basically she's ended her relationship with her bf because she's realised she's bi and has an on off gf. The lads pissed she's ended it and decided to tell her whole collage she's gay. My advice so far has been to be proud of what she is. Is nobody's business but hers but she's only just 17 and in bits over it. Can anyone think of anything else I can do to help her other than obviously support her as an where I can.... plz this is a serious post and although I'm normally the joker in the pack this time I'm deadly serious. So any ideas. You've given good advice. You've told her you care. You've told her you're there for her. Perfect!!!!! A wise man once wrote; Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy. " Wise words | |||
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"I bet most of the people who have heard what he's said thinks he's a childish prick. You're doing what any parent would. What a great dad you are x I try but never feel I get it quite right but I'm proud she knew to come to me. That pulled a few strings I can tell you. NONE of us feel we're getting it quite right! " If your constantly questioning if your a good parent, then in all likelihood you are a good parent. Those that think they’re the best are usually the opposite. | |||
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"To your daughter it's fine to be bi. Basically she's ended her relationship with her bf because she's realised she's bi and has an on off gf. The lads pissed she's ended it and decided to tell her whole collage she's gay. My advice so far has been to be proud of what she is. Is nobody's business but hers but she's only just 17 and in bits over it. Can anyone think of anything else I can do to help her other than obviously support her as an where I can.... plz this is a serious post and although I'm normally the joker in the pack this time I'm deadly serious. So any ideas." I think you've already answered your own question. You tell her you live her and happy with her, her sexuality will never affect the way you feel about her. | |||
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"Tell her from me.. "It's who you are, not what you do with it; That's what's important in life". That she should continue to hold her head up high and walk tall and with confidence; secure in the knowledge that she is living honestly and with freedom. Now would be a good time to confess something about your own life that she may not know about you. Bond over the bizarre, unique, interesting details of how different and curious we all are. I wish her the best of luck at school, the real world will be far easier." She already knows everything about me the good and bad. She even knows she was the best mistake I ever made. She's my world | |||
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"To your daughter it's fine to be bi. Basically she's ended her relationship with her bf because she's realised she's bi and has an on off gf. The lads pissed she's ended it and decided to tell her whole collage she's gay. My advice so far has been to be proud of what she is. Is nobody's business but hers but she's only just 17 and in bits over it. Can anyone think of anything else I can do to help her other than obviously support her as an where I can.... plz this is a serious post and although I'm normally the joker in the pack this time I'm deadly serious. So any ideas." There's a group called TIE (time for inclusive education) they have a lot of resources and training for schools, colleges and unis. Outing someone is inexcusable, in this way it's damaging. Suggest you surround her with supportive friends and family and go to local events, meets etc for LGBT students and families, it's trauma to be sure but teaching her resilience will serve her well in future and if she owns everything about herself then nothing can be taken from her. Also give her a massive hug from me xxx | |||
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"To your daughter it's fine to be bi. Basically she's ended her relationship with her bf because she's realised she's bi and has an on off gf. The lads pissed she's ended it and decided to tell her whole collage she's gay. My advice so far has been to be proud of what she is. Is nobody's business but hers but she's only just 17 and in bits over it. Can anyone think of anything else I can do to help her other than obviously support her as an where I can.... plz this is a serious post and although I'm normally the joker in the pack this time I'm deadly serious. So any ideas. There's a group called TIE (time for inclusive education) they have a lot of resources and training for schools, colleges and unis. Outing someone is inexcusable, in this way it's damaging. Suggest you surround her with supportive friends and family and go to local events, meets etc for LGBT students and families, it's trauma to be sure but teaching her resilience will serve her well in future and if she owns everything about herself then nothing can be taken from her. Also give her a massive hug from me xxx" Took me a second to suss the LGBT bit but I got there. Thanks most of that was my 1st conversation with her. God and I thought boys where hard work. Feeling much better now. | |||
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"My lads just come out with a cracker. All women are bi it's a blokes job to find out if its bisexual or bipolar. Sorry to the bi pipolars but it made me chuckle " I must be bipolar | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games. That's not a very good way of dealing with it Made her smile and that was my point. It does say up there niether of us would touch him." You were making her certain you had her back if she ever wanted it but you're twice as awesome for realising that what happens is her choice. Also colleges and unis have fantastic pastoral care for these situations, she may not wish to approach them but reporting a revenge outing is a good idea in case he's the type who'll foster his bruised ego and try to niggle at her in subtler ways. 10/10 Dadding tho. | |||
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"In this day and age I doubt anybody would bat an eye lid at the news, especially in a student environment. She could always spread a vicious rumour about him, lukes it up the bum with an 8” strap on or something but other than that I’d tell her to just get on with her life and to shrug off any comments. She won’t be the only gay or bi student at her college and they’ll be talking about somebody else tomorrow. Basically that's what I've tried to do. Like you I know today nobody really cares in fact I'd go so far as to say its trendy but to her it's a whole other story. Kids can be real cunts. I told her to play with his head right back. Hes met me and I'm 6ft 1 and her brother who's 6ft8. I told her to tell her we are both after his blood. Obviously niether of us would touch him unless he did her but we didn't start the head games. That's not a very good way of dealing with it Made her smile and that was my point. It does say up there niether of us would touch him. You were making her certain you had her back if she ever wanted it but you're twice as awesome for realising that what happens is her choice. Also colleges and unis have fantastic pastoral care for these situations, she may not wish to approach them but reporting a revenge outing is a good idea in case he's the type who'll foster his bruised ego and try to niggle at her in subtler ways. 10/10 Dadding tho. " Good point I'd not thought of any of that. I reckon in a week or 2 most will turn on him anyway. What's worse being gay/bi or be a homophobic | |||
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"My lads just come out with a cracker. All women are bi it's a blokes job to find out if its bisexual or bipolar. Sorry to the bi pipolars but it made me chuckle I must be bipolar " I still would | |||
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"My lads just come out with a cracker. All women are bi it's a blokes job to find out if its bisexual or bipolar. Sorry to the bi pipolars but it made me chuckle " Sorry but I hate that joke. | |||
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"I came out at high school. 90% of people were fine. Most that weren't were just childish. Eventually even my own best friends would forget as it's mostly irrelevant to everyday life. Me being out about it however did mean I had a few classmates approach me when struggling with their own sexuality as they felt they could talk to me about it which was great. It's sad that your daughter has had the power taken away from her to tell people on her terms but now that it's out I would encourage her to be proud and take no shit. The more it's talked about, the more it is being accepted. Big hugs to her and sorry she has experienced the childish behaviour of her ex. He's probably just trying to save his own ego by implying she left him because she's gay." Just what I've done. Proper cunts trick with the lad but as said say more about him than her. Thank you. | |||
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"My lads just come out with a cracker. All women are bi it's a blokes job to find out if its bisexual or bipolar. Sorry to the bi pipolars but it made me chuckle Sorry but I hate that joke." No offense ment I know it's a serious thing it just made me chuckle when I needed to. Again no offense ment. | |||
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"My lads just come out with a cracker. All women are bi it's a blokes job to find out if its bisexual or bipolar. Sorry to the bi pipolars but it made me chuckle " Not funny. | |||
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"My lads just come out with a cracker. All women are bi it's a blokes job to find out if its bisexual or bipolar. Sorry to the bi pipolars but it made me chuckle Not funny. " I've been told and do e my best to apologise. Being dislexic myself I should have know better. 1s again I apologise...... | |||
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